"I still can't believe you fucking forgot us in jail," Puck groused once more as he rode in the back seat with Santana on the way back to Lima. "You guys suck so bad."
"Oh grow up, Noah," Rachel sighed in response. "We came for you, you're out, no one is pressing charges. I'd consider it a successful evening."
"Of course you would," he sniped back. "You got laid. You made up with your husband."
"Puck. Seriously. I don't think you got too bad of a deal out of the extra thirty minutes," Santana interjected before he and Rachel could get into another of their typical fights. "I mean, you and I made up," she added.
"This is true," he smirked before sliding closer to Santana and slipping his arm around her. He winked at Rachel through the rearview mirror before pressing his lips to Santana's neck.
"They're making out, aren't they?" Finn asked, eyes glued on the road.
"Yeah," Rachel said as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
"Do you have to go to the bathroom again?" her husband asked. She had been doing that every once in a while since leaving Dayton.
"No," she grunted out as she shifted again. "Baby's just wiggling a lot."
"Hads was like that too," Finn commented. "Right before you …" he trailed off as his eyes went wide. "Rach?"
"Keep driving, Finn," she told him thickly.
"Rachel."
"Please, Finn. I need to get back to Lima. Now."
"The fuck is wrong with you?" Puck asked as he and Santana came up for air. "You look sick."
"Nothing,' Rachel told him as she clenched her teeth and her hands flew to her stomach and a small whimper escaped her lips.
"Oh my God," Santana said as she straightened herself out. "Are you in fucking labor?"
"What the fuck?" Puck screeched as he pulled his legs up onto the back seat.
-x-
Kurt groaned as he rolled over and tried to grab his alarm clock and came up with something completely different.
"Why are you grabbing my nose?" Jesse groaned as he swatted Kurt's hand away.
Kurt shrieked, grabbed the blanket and fell out of bed.
-x-
"Mmm," Quinn smiled as she snuggled closer to her husband. "I'm really glad we decided not to go back to Lima last night."
"Me too," Sam said as his lips ran gently across his wife's bare shoulders.
"I wonder what happened to them," Quinn said absently as she turned in her husband's arms and shifted so she could press her lips to his. "I would have thought for sure Santana would have called to bitch us out or …"
"Baby," he whispered as he rolled them so he was hovering over her, "if you're thinking of Santana and the rest of them, clearly I didn't do my job right."
"Well, you know what they say," she giggled as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Practice makes perfect."
"Little minx," he growled before lowering himself to press a hot kiss against his wife's smiling lips.
"Say my name," she giggled again as he attached her slender neck with his tongue and teeth.
"No time," Sam said as he placed a last kiss on her lips before rolling to the side. "We need to head back. You have church in a few hours and I need to get working on the landscaping over at West. It's Spirit Week or something and Finn and Puck are letting me run lead on the project. I don't want to let them down on my first run through."
"And exactly how long are you planning on working in landscaping?" Quinn asked as she moved to an upright position and pulled the sheet up to cover her chest.
"Until I can do something else," Sam said softly as he pulled his boxers on. "It's giving me the rehab I need without me having to go to a gym and have other guys staring at me like they know what it feels like."
"If you'd go to the gym over in Columbus …"
"I'm not going to an Air Force gym. I don't need to be around those cocky flyboys all the time and I sure don't need to drive all the way to Columbus to do it. I have the gym at home and the guys are letting me help out. It's helping me get back my range of motion a lot faster than lifting weights at the gym. So can we please drop it? I like what I'm doing, I get to spend time with our friends and I don't need to be on the other side of the world to make a difference to someone."
"I'm just not sure planting flowers is the best way to rehabilitate your arm."
"So, what? You report on one health story and you're a doctor now?" he gritted out, wincing a little as his arm got caught in his sleeve.
"Sam," she said softly, reaching out to help him.
"Don't," he said as he shifted away and stood up. "We need to get going. I'll go see if I can find Kurt." She pulled his pants on and slid on his flip flops. "I'm sorry I won't be moving up the ranks in the Army like your father wanted. I can't help that I got shot and discharged. Finn and Puck do good, solid work. They provide. And I will too. If they can do it planting shrubs and flowers and stuff, so can I." He paused as he opened the door. "There's nothing wrong with getting your hands dirty for a living. I feel good when I come home from work. I'll meet you in the lobby in fifteen minutes," he told her finally before walking out of the hotel room and leaving her alone.
-x-
"What the hell, Jesse?" Kurt cried as he wrapped the blanket around his chest.
"You know you're not naked, right?" Jesse asked absently as he rolled over and slid a pair of slim glasses onto his nose. "You're still wearing pants."
Kurt furrowed his brow before pulling the blanket away from his body and cautiously peering down the front. "Huh," he said slowly before letting the blanket slide to the floor. "So I am."
"You're so overdramatic," the older man told him as he rolled out of bed and pulled a long-sleeved t-shirt on. He ran his fingers through his hair and turned back to his bedmate. "Before you can ask, no. We didn't have sex last night."
"Right," Kurt nodded quickly. "Pretty sure I would feel it if we had."
Jesse simply stared at him, eyes wide.
"I … cannot believe I said that out loud. To you. Right now," Kurt said, his eyes blinking in disbelief. "I … please excuse me," he added before running to the bathroom and shutting the door.
Jesse sighed and looked to the ceiling, silently wondering what was up with this McKinley group and locking themselves in the bathroom after an uncomfortable, somewhat sexual situation. "Kurt," he said exasperatedly. "Come out of there. No reason to hide or be ashamed."
"Go away."
"You're being dramatic."
"It's kind of my thing," Kurt shot back, his voice muffled by the door. "Just … give me a minute to collect myself."
"Fine," Jesse muttered. "I'll go grab some coffee and pastries from the continental breakfast. You … do whatever it is you have to do in there and I'll be back in ten minutes or so."
"Okay," Kurt said as he sat down on the closed toilet lid.
He was completely mortified. He really needed to censor himself better when he was around Jesse. Not that he intended on being around Jesse. At all. Ever.
He held his breath and listened for the door to the hotel room to close. Once it had, he slowly opened the door to the bathroom, his eyes darting around to make sure Jesse actually left. When he saw the coast was clear, he zipped across the room to grab his shirt. As he buttoned it, his eyes scanned the room for his shoes. Once found, he quickly slid them on, grabbed his cell phone, and moved to the door. He repeated his actions from the bathroom and let out a breath when he saw he was alone.
Or so he thought.
"Sneaking out?" a voice called from over his shoulder.
"N-no," he squeaked as he spun to see Jesse leaning against the wall next to the ice machine.
"Listen, it's okay," the older man smiled as he advanced. "Still not completely comfortable with the whole one night stand thing …"
"You said we didn't have sex!" Kurt screeched before slapping his hands over his mouth before whispering the same phrase fiercely to his companion.
"Calm down. We didn't. It was a phrase. I'm just saying …" he said as he stepped closer still, backing Kurt against the wall. "When you decide that you're finished with safe guys …" But he didn't finish the sentence. He simply leaned forward and pressed a hot open-mouthed kiss to Kurt's lips.
As soon as the younger man started responding, Jesse pulled back with a grin. "You know where to find me," he said before disappearing into his hotel room again.
Kurt stood in the hall for a moment, eyes wide, breathing heavy, as he tried to comprehend what had just happened.
What in the hell did he tell Jesse last night?
-x-
"Oh God," Rachel ground out, her eyes watering and hands gripping tighter at her stomach. "This hurts way more without the epidural."
"I'm going as fast as I can, babe," Finn said in panic. "We're only fifteen minutes away."
"I don't know if she's going to make it twenty minutes," Santana said from where she was leaned forward, her hand being held in Rachel's. "Her contractions are only seven minutes apart."
"Get me to that hospital, Finn Hudson. Speed if you have to."
Santana looked to see where Finn's speedometer was hitting 85. "He's going as fast as he can, honey. We'll make it."
Finn pressed a little harder.
When Rachel cried out only five minutes later, they all resigned themselves to the fact that this baby was probably going to come in the car.
Luckily, however, Finn pressed a little harder and they cut their time in half. Finn pulled into the emergency parking bay and yelled, "San! Go get someone with a wheelchair. Puck! Help me get Rachel out of the car."
Santana brought Rachel's hand up and pressed it to her lips before bolting from the car.
Puck got out as well and opened the passenger door. "I got her. You go park and meet us in there."
"Right. Make sure you tell them she's having a baby."
"I think they'll be able to figure that one out all on their own," Puck told his friend seriously as he gently lifted Rachel from the car.
"I love you," Finn called out as he pulled from the bay and headed to try to find a parking spot.
"Noah," Rachel said softly as she looked up to him. "It hurts really bad," she told him before her knees buckled.
"Damnit," he swore as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. "The fuck is …?" He looked up to see Santana arguing with some kid with a wheelchair. "Fuck it," he muttered to himself before grunting and lifting Rachel into his arms. He walked into the ER and shouted, "Can somebody get her a fucking wheelchair?"
"Language," Rachel whispered.
"Fuck'em," he whispered back and he saw her smile.
And then she started screaming bloody murder.
That sure as hell got the kid's attention.
-x-
"Sam!" Quinn called as she ran into the lobby. "Sam. We have to go. We have to go now. I just got a text from Santana. Rachel's in labor."
"Isn't it early?"
"Yeah, but not too early. But we need to get there."
"Where's Kurt?" her husband asked as his eyes darted around the lobby.
"Right here," Kurt said as he approached. He still looked slightly dazed. "Let's go."
"I'm driving," Quinn said as she swiped the keys from Sam's hand. "I wanna get there before the baby graduates college."
"I can see this is going to be a calm ride back," Kurt muttered as he followed behind, his eyes occasionally glancing behind him to the hallway where room 189 was situated.
-x-
"Where's Finn?" Rachel ground out as she held Noah's hand tightly and Santana wiped her brow with a cool towel.
"He fell when he was running into the ER. They're making sure he doesn't have a concussion," Dr. Woo said as he walked into the room. "Hello, Rachel."
"Stuff it," she muttered before letting out a breath and relaxing her grip on Noah's hand.
He winced slightly as he pulled his hand from her grip and shook it out in a vain attempt to restart circulation.
"Looks like most of the contractions were before you got here?"
"Started in the car," Santana said to the doctor. "They looked really painful."
"They were," Rachel said softly, her eyes closing. "I just want my husband."
"I'll go find him," Puck said as he smoothed her hair away from her sweaty forehead. "And I'll call Carole and Burt while I'm at it."
"Please don't leave me," Rachel whimpered as she gripped his hand again. "Please, Noah."
"I'll go," Santana said as she pressed a kiss to Rachel's forehead and headed out of the room.
"I'm sorry," she said to Puck as soon as Santana was gone. "You're such a wonderful man … I don't know why I always think the worst of you …"
"Uhh …" he said as he screwed up his face.
"It's the drugs talking," the nurse said with a smile. "She'll be like this between contractions but then …"
"Oh my God!" Rachel cried out as she grabbed Puck's hand and squeezed.
"Ow!" he cried out and tried to pull his hand back but she just squeezed harder. "The hell, Berry! Let me go!" His eyes were wide and his breathing was heavy, seriously concerned for the wellbeing of his hand. "I need this thing!" he said as her breathing slowed and her grip loosened.
"Woo! Get my husband!"
"Sorry, Rachel," he said with a smile as he pulled on his gloves. "But it's time for you to start pushing."
"No!" she cried out. "Not without Finn! Noah! Push my legs together!"
He stared at her for a moment, eyes wide, mouth gaping open. "No one has ever said that to me before."
"Noah!"
"Rachel!" Finn cried out as he ran into the room, sliding into the position next to her bed. "Babe, I am so sorry. I was running in and I slipped and I hit my head and everyone was freaking out so they made me get checked out. I'm fine. No damage …"
"Big surprise," Puck muttered.
"Shut up, Puck," Finn said without taking his eyes off of Rachel. "Santana called Mom and Burt. They're on their way with Hadley."
"Well they can meet the new baby when they get here. Rachel, I need you to push."
"Hold my hand, baby," Finn said as he held his large hand out to her. "Squeeze as hard as you need to. I'm right here and I love you."
"I love you too," she whimpered before she started to push and a loud screamed was torn from her throat.
Puck thought it was so much different seeing this when he was older. He looked up when the door opened and gave Santana a small smile that she couldn't see as she entered the room with her mask pulled back over her face.
Five good pushes, seven loud screams and a possibly-broken finger later, Rachel slumped back onto the bed and the sound of a baby wailing filled the room.
"It's a boy," Dr. Woo said with a smile.
.xo.
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