*Disclaimer: I do not own "Gossip Girl" or any of its characters or originally initial storylines from the show. No copyright infringement intended.

…

She'd tried her best to keep busy. For the most part it hadn't been that difficult. She'd had Serena, her father, and her mother to interact and worry about – especially after Thanksgiving. But in those spare moments when the only thing she had was herself and her thoughts, she thought more about Chuck than Nate, and she knew, despite everything her age-old ex-boyfriend had done to her, that that shouldn't be the case. She figured it was probably because he had taken her virginity from her, but she didn't want to forget that if at all possible, even if he had been abnormally sweet the night of her birthday party, so keeping busy seemed like the most brilliant decision she had come up with yet.

Truth was, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about it since it had happened. Not the first time because she'd done fairly well keeping herself occupied the next day, not to mention the fact that the pain had her wanting nothing more than to abandon sex for the rest of her life. But the following time, the second time, when she'd just thrown herself into it because she needed to forget how much Nate had disappointed her after the hundredth chance she'd given him, and the embarrassment of it being blasted for the whole of Manhattan to see. She couldn't believe she'd actually felt guilty about sleeping with Chuck the night they broke up, or the fact that his family was not exactly in the best of circumstances at the moment. He'd found some other girl to blow off his steam on, and what was worse was that it wasn't even Serena this time. That could only mean that it wasn't merely attraction for Serena – or maybe even being in love with her – it was her, she, Blair Waldorf that was the problem, and she just couldn't take that. Chuck had made her feel wanted, adored, had gloried in her body and had comforted her when he knew she hurt the much. She couldn't help but stopping thinking about it. It was what linked them together – their new state anyway.

She'd thought about sex often enough since puberty, though obviously not as much as Chuck did, given he felt the need to have sex every time he thought about it. But ever since that night a week or so prior, whenever she had a spare moment to herself, it was all she could think about. Her body had been aching to feel Chuck's touch again. The last thing in the world she wanted to think about was Nate, and, she'd never admit aloud, but secretly she was convinced he couldn't be half as good as Chuck was. He wasn't as experienced after all, she justified herself. And so, with Chuck gone for the holidays and her determined that this was just a phase – she'd wear off the urges in due time obviously – she resorted to masturbating in her bathroom, tonight being one of those nights. She always washed her hands for like ten minutes afterwards. The fact that she'd actually given into the repulsive act disgusted her beyond belief, but she supposed it was better she sit on the toilet to do that then doing what she'd done in the past. This was less…damaging…health-wise. At least, she thought it was. The fact that she hadn't orgasmed once during one of these experiments further proved her point. Of course, it also frustrated her to no end. She did not like that Chuck had so imprinted himself on her body that she could not help but want him to a greedy, desirous state.

Just a phase, she repeated to herself over and over. Just a phase.

"Am I interrupting something?"

The question froze her two steps out of the bathroom. She hadn't realized she'd started saying the words aloud. She only hoped she hadn't said anything else out loud. Or that the individual that that voice belonged to hadn't heard her heavy panting behind the bathroom doors. She may not have orgasmed, but that didn't mean she hadn't gotten herself pretty worked up. Another thing that had her very frustrated. The way Chuck's fingers had moved on and in her the two times they'd slept together had been burned into her mind. Visualizing him doing the dirty deed no helped in said heavy panting.

She cleared her throat, slowly turning towards him. He was leaning against the wall by the doorway entering into her room. The smirk that was ever present on his face did not disappoint today. His voice had sent chills down her spine, and she felt the muscles around her thighs clench at the sight of that smirk, of the ever so fashionable and yet flamboyant clothes that shouted Chuck Bass. And the fact that he was in her bedroom, with the door closed. She hadn't remembered the door being closed when she'd gone into the bathroom.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, extremely disappointed in herself for not sounding more snappy or cold or cruel. Fact was that she wanted him, or at least her body did. When she'd just spent the last half hour trying to get a rush that he could achieve in two minutes, she couldn't help but feel drawn to him. At one point she thought she was going to go weak at the knees and faint.

"We just got back an hour ago," he said casually, lazily walking across the room and sitting down on the edge of her bed. She followed him with her cautious brown eyes and then was suddenly very conscious of just how much of herself was showing in her nightwear. It made her flush bright pink. The flames she felt now came from both her cheeks and the depths of her stomach. She needed him to leave, but she prayed to God that he wouldn't. She would have smiled at the fact that she knew he wouldn't – he was Chuck Bass. Only, she was too intoxicated by the whole situation to think straight at all.

"You look hot," he said, his eyes raking over her figure and the barely there nightie she'd decided to put on. I hadn't planned for him to be here, she defended herself.

She rolled her eyes and walked to her closed bedroom door. She was nothing if not insistent and dominating when it came to decision-making. Chuck was not her best friend or the boyfriend she'd so doted on for years. He was Chuck Bass, and if she wanted to outgrow the phase he'd sucked her into, she could not give into temptation, especially not so easily. She frowned though at the realization that she was pushing away the pleasure she'd so yearned for in the last week. The heat she'd felt in her face and stomach spread to the back of her thighs where he was no doubt staring at as she walked towards the door. She felt his gaze burn through her clothes too and knew she wouldn't be able to get him to leave. She would still try though. She wouldn't be another girl that would just fall into his arms begging for sex because he was hot, charming and rich. She realized then that that was the first time she'd referred to him as hot and charming, even in her mind. It was a very unsettling realization.

"Get out, Chuck," she said, opening the door and turning back to him. "And stop staring at my ass," she demanded coolly. She was proud of herself for that.

He raised his brows in amusement and leaned back on his elbows, kicking off his shoes and sinking into the comforter on her bed. "I have a proposition for you, Waldorf."

She pursed her lips tightly. "Well, I don't want to hear it. It's late and—"

"It's 8:00," he blanched, "on a Saturday night." She closed her eyes in frustration. "I'm surprised you're not out with Serena or some of the girls from school. There's got to be a party going on somewhere."

"Thanksgiving was yesterday, Chuck," she said.

"It's the Upper East Side," he countered, and she knew she could not argue that point. She contemplated giving him another reason as to why she was in, how Thanksgiving had been quite stressful for her, to say the least. The last thing she wanted to be doing was out partying with people she was not really close to. She gave up on that.

"Everyone knows that it's not a party without Chuck Bass."

He smirked smugly and she cursed herself. What the hell was she doing? Boosting his ego was not going to help her cause in getting him to leave.

He sat up and stood to his feet, keeping his eyes pinned on hers as he walked towards her. He stopped a foot and a half away from her and slid his hands into his pockets. "About my proposal…" he began again. It was somewhat difficult this time to keep her frustration from visibly appearing on her face. She had one more source of ammunition she could use to throw at him. Despite who he was, she didn't want to hurt him in that regard, but she felt she had no other chance. She'd no doubt regret it, because he was bound to hurt her just as badly in return, but at the moment it was all she had to work with. And, it would get him to leave, and get this phase to end much quicker.

"How was your trip?" she asked innocently. "Was there some good bonding time with your father?" She looked at him in wait of what he would say. Chuck's face fell, though not as much as she would have hoped. The sore spot she'd no doubt poked at seemed to go right over his head almost.

"Just about as much as there was with yours. Tell me, did Daddy dearest bring his French lover with him to share your beloved pumpkin pie?" he asked lightly. Her brows narrowed, her eyes grew dark, and her face paled all at the same time.

"Those weren't quite the events of yesterday," she said neutrally, but she knew he could tell the bitterness in her voice, but like the usual Chuck she knew, he didn't appear to be feeling guilty. He was just waiting now for her next words. She would not give into him. She wouldn't. Especially now that he'd prodded just as roughly if not more at her sore spot and had no doubt affected her.

"Oh?" he asked innocently. She was annoyed. "What did happen then?" he inquired. She rolled her eyes and scoffed, moving around him towards her bed. She pulled back the covers at the head of her bed.

"Just leave, Chuck," she said on a brief short sigh. The horny state she'd been in just a few minutes earlier had completely dissipated. Now she was hurt and frustrated and he needed to leave, because she was sure she wouldn't be having any physical urges for him till at least until the middle of the night, the morning if she was lucky.

She heard the footsteps move away from her and encouraged herself that he was leaving. She even heard the door close. She told her that was a good thing. She didn't even have the desire for sex now, so it made perfect sense that she just got over his hurtful words with a good night's sleep. The fact that she was so back-and-forth in regards to her feelings for him and the whole of the situation was something she did not want to think about. It would all be so much clearer when she was out of this phase.

When she turned around to get the lights though, he was still in the room and two feet away from the door, walking towards her. She noticed that he'd taken the liberty to lock the door. Her eyes widened as she finally registered him advancing towards her. He pulled his sweater over his head mid-way there and tossed it across the room. She barely had time to realize everything that was happening before he was right in her face, cupping it in his hands and kissing her deeply. Despite herself she sunk into the embrace, her hands shakily coming around to grip his shoulders. He lowered the both of them to her bed and turned off the light.

"I think you're going to like my proposition," he said huskily into her mouth. She moaned and arched against him as his hands traveled down her body and slipped under the silk material of her nightgown. The fire in the pit of her stomach ignited itself once again the second she'd realized he was still in the room. It had rushed into her naval when he'd ripped his sweater off and she was actually annoyed by the fact that he'd had a shirt under it.

They gasped simultaneously – her because the feel of his hands even on her thighs was incredible, exotic and warm and tempting the pleasures that she'd so desired for what felt like a millennium; him because he'd discovered she wasn't wearing any panties. A lightbulb went on in his head and he lifted his head to look into her eyes. He'd clearly recovered from his shock and was now fairly sure that he was very right in the assumption that had come to him.

"Blair, were you…?" He left the question open-ended, because he knew that she knew exactly what he was referring to. And what he'd anticipated just then was confirmed when her cheeks flushed pink bordering on red, able to see even in the dark. A beat later she tensed and avoided his eyes madly. He just chuckled huskily against her and pressed a kiss against the spot where her jaw and neck collided. Despite her new embarrassment, she couldn't help but arch up into him again.

"Oh Blair," he said cockily, knowingly. He moved his mouth up further and nibbled lightly on her ear lobe. She tried very hard to stifle her moan. "You want me," he told her, as if she wasn't already aware of that fact. But hearing the words from his mouth set her off. The tension turned from one of embarrassment to sexual desire. Her whole body was on fire, consumed in the passion he always brought to her on a silver platter, demanding she partake in the deliciously forbidden fruit. She opened her eyes wide and pushed her hands on his chest so that he'd have to sit up. He didn't look to be upset at all, or about to disobey whatever negative decision she might have decided she needed to demand of him. He just unbuttoned and tossed his shirt to the floor. An even more intense desire twisted with relief flooded onto her face. She reached for him desperately and crushed his body into hers, now kissing him wildly.

"I think you've already said yes," he said breathlessly when she began to tease him mercilessly, slipping her hands beneath his waistband and taking a considerable amount of time there before pushing the pants even a little off his waist. Oh yeah, she thought. She was definitely saying yes. She didn't know what to exactly yet, but there were a few ideas spinning in her head that she considered he might have thought of. One of them stood out more than the rest and she was quite pleased with the possibility of it. In fact, she yearned for it to be true, phase be damned. This felt too good.

A secret affair sounded perfect.

…

A/N: Hope you enjoyed. Please review. =)