"Okay don't kill me please, I was on vacation for three weeks then had a week of writers block" I said
"Thank god for that" muttered Malfoy
"Shut it Malfoy" I said
"Okay, good Fred and George are here" I said
"We sure are" they said
"Yes, now clearly all my reviewers hate me, but we'll get to that later first from Alex-nutter, if you remember Fred" I hinted
"Oh, I remember" he said
"Okay, first for Harry, he has to go to Rita Skeeter with some ridiculous story, for her to print" I said
"Oh, great" moaned Harry, I snapped my fingers, which I do a lot, and Rita Skeeter appeared.
"Oh my" she tittered
"Yeah, yeah, so Rita I've got a story for you" said Harry
"In that case let me get my quick-quill quotes" she said excitedly
"Ok, well you see, me, Ron and Hermione here we um..." he started
"Oh Harry don't get me involved" whispered Hermione, Harry motioned for her to shush.
"We, well have discovered a new animal" said Harry
"Harry what are you doing" asked Hermione quietly
"You don't say" said Rita
"Yes, Ron saw it one day, while his, Brother Fred was kicking him" said Harry
"I was what?" asked Fred
"You remember, when he poured soup on you" said Harry
"So, Ron, why did you pour soup on your brother?" she asked "Angry perhaps? Maybe he stole one of your girlfriends" she said her eyes flickering to Hermione
"What? I mean no" said Ron
"It's okay dear, it wouldn't be the first time Hermione has strayed-"said Rita
"Okay, you out!" said Hermione standing, Rita shrugged and disappeared
"Well that was fun" I said "Oh no"
"What" asked Ron
"Malfoy and I gave to play 7 minutes in heaven" I muttered
"What's that?" asked Malfoy
"Oh a muggle game where two people go into a small place and do whatever they want for 7 minutes" laughed Hermione, I glared at her, and she fell silent
"So come on Malfoy" I said, he followed me into a closet at the end of the great hall, in the closet we were quite squished up against each other, Malfoy gave me a questioning look.
"Try anything and you die" I said simply, he nodded fearfully
"Your time's up" said the twins
"Finally" I said pushing past Malfoy
"Have fun?" asked George
"Do you like living?" I asked back, he just shrugged
"Okay after that, George, you have to go up to a random girl and say this" I said handing him the piece of paper
"Oh, wow" he said, he looked around the great hall "But there is no one here"
"Well go look in the corridor" I suggested, he shrugged and stuck his head out the door.
"Oi, you" he said calling to a girl
"Yes" replied a timid voice
"Come here" said George, a tiny girl, looking to be about 3rd year entered the great hall. George took a breath.
"Georgie porgy pudding and pie, kissed the girls and made them cry, when the boys came out to play, Georgie porgy ran away" sang George dancing around for good measure, everyone was laughing, and the poor girl looked positively terrified , her eyes as wide as saucers. The girl ran away and everyone applauded as George took a bow.
"Oh my god, poor girl" I said
"Yep this boy keeps all the girls away" said Fred giving his brother a playful punch.
"Alright dare for Hermione and Ron, sing so this is love from Cinderella
"Oh I love that song" said Hermione dreamily.
"What the heck is that?' asked Ron
"Just go" I said
"So this is love" sang Hermione dancing with Ron "So this is love, so this is what makes life divine, I'm all aglow, and now I know"
"And know I know" sang Ron, the twins were stiffing their laughter, while Malfoy made gagging noises and Harry shook his head embarrassed for his best friends. Finally the song ended.
"Wow that was..." I started "Let's move on" just then there was a loud knock on the door, I leapt up and went to the door
"Hello" I said opening the door
"What is the meaning of this?" asked Professor McGonagall.
"Professor, so good to see you again" I said
"Do I know you?" she asked thinking, then her face hardened. "Oh yes your that girl who asked me all those wretched questions" said McGonagall.
"I didn't come up with them" I defended
"Well, these children need to go in there for breakfast" said McGonagall
"Not today, but I need you, come in" I said, she hesitated but entered.
"Oh it's THIS group, should have guessed" she said
"Yes, yes now Alex wants to know if you'd be mad if she realised a dog in your office." I said
"What? The very Idea, I am not a cat all the time" she sputtered
"Right, would you be mad? And can she do it?" I asked
"Well of course I would be mad, and NO she can't do it, any professor would be mad if they found a dog in their office." She said
"Okay thank you for your time, goodbye" I said snapping my fingers and she disappeared
"Okay, truth for Fred, how much do you love Alex?" I asked
"Well, of course a lot, I mean how could you not with that sexy Irish accent, and sparkling personality plus you have great choice in guys" said Fred
"Oh give it a rest" said George
"You're just jealous I'm the better looking twin" said Fred
"Oh my god" said Hermione
"Shut up you two" I yelled at them and they grew silent.
"Okay dare for Malfoy, you have to move like Malfoy from a very potter musical, if you remember" I said
"I try not to" cringed Malfoy
"Okay well you have to "I said, he rolled his eyes, but started to roll on the floor, he fell and struck another pose.
"I don't see a difference form how he moves normally" said Ron, he and Harry laughed
"Yep, okay back in your seat Malfoy" I said
"Okay next review, can you believe that one took up three pages? Oh well" I said "Next from trachie17"
"Oh it's that illness again" said Malfoy
"Shut it, we will do her first dares last just because I'm not sure if the whole school will still be here" I said then went to open the door.
"Ok, whole school, sit down where you normally do, we have a few announcements" I yelled so everyone could hear me. After a big rustle everyone was sitting.
"Okay Ron, Hermione your first you have to announce your love to everyone" I said
"What?" they asked
"Go" I said pushing them up to that bird pedestal thing.
"Um, okay, I would just like to say that I love Hermione" said Ron
"And I love Ron" said Hermione, there was a moment of silence
"Well finally" someone shouted and the hall burst into applause
"Okay calm down" I said "Now Ginny and Harry"
"What?" they asked
"Same deal, now go" I said
"Yeah, well um, I love Ginny" said Harry
"Ya and I love Harry" she said
"Saw that one coming too" said another voice from the crowd and everyone started clapping again.
"Okay, um, Malfoy is next" I said
"What do I say" he hissed at me.
"Here I whispered handing him a piece of paper with the dare on it. He went up and read the paper to himself; he gave me a pleading look. I shrugged
"Well if you want me to do this, get up here" he whispered to me, I groaned and walked up.
"Ok um, Pansy?" he said, Pansy stood up from the Slytherin table,
"Yes" she said excitedly, I glared at her, was she expecting a confession too, well you getting one.
"Um, well were over" he said, there was a great rush of whispering.
"What?" she screeched "Is there someone else?"
"Well ya" he said tilting his head towards me.
"Her? You have got to be kidding me" she scoffed, he frowned
"Don't insult her, he grabbed my arm and kissed me on the mouth. Okay let's get this straight I didn't like it, I don't care what, you, even though he has really soft lips I DIDN'T like it, okay?
When he stopped I was a little dazed and so was he, the hall erupted in applause again, Pansy looked dumbstruck.
"Okay, bye" I said clapping my hands and the hall was empty again except for Seamus
"What am I still doing here" he asked
"Oh, you're about to meet your new girlfriend" I said smiling
"What?" he asked, just then trachie13 appeared
"Hey baby, so I am free tomorrow so you can take me out then, come on we have a lot to talk about" she said dragging Seamus out of the great hall.
"Okay now from ravenclawgurl" I said and read over the paper "oh really your LITTLE sister said that? How old is she?" I said very irritated
"Let's go Malfoy" I said
"Go where?" he asked
"Um, read the paper, come on keep up" I said, he read it rolled his eyes and followed me
"So where do you want to go?" he asked me as we walked out of Hogwarts with the rest of the gang trailing after us.
"I don't know it's supposed to be 'romantic'" I said putting air quotes around romantic
"Well how about here?" he asked, it was a small cozy place between hogsmead and Hogwarts
"Sure I suppose" I said and we walked in.
"Oh what a lovely couple" said the waitress seeing us, my fists clenched but I did nothing else
"Will you all be seated together?" she asked seeing all the people behind us.
"Absolutely not" Malfoy and I said at the same time
"Yeah, but we want a table right next to theirs" said George
"You know where you can hear them and get a good view" finished Fred; I shot them a death glare they grinned.
"Alright then" she said cheerfully and we went to our tables. We just sat there for a while I glared at him, it amazed me that he can look arrogant and nervous at the same time.
"You guys aren't being romantic enough" Whispered Fred to us
"Shut up Fred" I hissed back at him, he continued to look at me expectantly until I leaned in closer to Malfoy and grabbed his hand. "Happy?" I asked angrily
"Ecstatic" he replied happily, we had our date, it was hard to enjoy it with our, or at least my, friends breathing down our necks, of course I wouldn't have enjoyed it anyway.
"So" I said
"What?" he asked
"Did you not read the rest of the dare?' I asked
"Oh" he said, I turned to the gang
"Do you people have to be here?" I asked
"Yes" they all said at the same time
"Fine" I said, so Malfoy and I snogged for like 30 seconds, it was a dare, not done willingly. And for like the millionth time I did not enjoy it, I have said that so many time, but that means... how many times have I kissed that prat anyway?
"Okay back to the castle" I said, we all trudged back to the castle and in into the great hall.
"Alright now for Hermione, you must tell your parents you're in love with Ron" I said
"Oh no" she exclaimed
"And why is that so bad?" asked Ron offended
"You really need to ask that" scoffed Malfoy, I glared at him
"Well you see they don't really like you" said Hermione in a small voice
"Why not?" he asked
"Well no matter what I say now, they keep their well my first impression of you in their heads" she said
"Oh they must really not like me" he said thinking back
"Yeah, they like Harry much more" said Hermione, Ron glared at Harry and Ginny glared at Hermione
"Oh you guys just calm down" I said then snapped my fingers and Hermione's parents were there
"Oh Hermione what are we doing here" they asked
"Well Mom, Dad I have something to tell you" she said
"I'm in love with... someone" she said
"Oh is it Harry, what a fine young man" beamed Mrs. Granger
"NO" Ron, and Ginny said loudly standing
"Oh well is it this handsome fellow, I don't believe we've met" said Mr. Granger
"NO" I said angrily
"Um, it's Ron" she said
"Ron?" they asked
"Yes" she said
"But we thought you didn't care for... Ron" they said his name coldly
"Mom that was 6 and half years ago" she said "I really love him
"Well okay then" her mother said
"You better treat her right, I may not be a wizard but you will be sorry if you hurt her" said Mr. Granger sternly to Ron
"Yes sir" said Ron weakly, and they disappeared, there was a small silence
"Well that was fun, moving on" I said then snapped my fingers and Edward Cullen and Belle Swan appeared.
"Ok, Ginny you have to slap Edward" I said
"Why?" she asked
"Hey, he looks exactly like..." said Ron
"CEDRIC DIGGORY" they all said together
"SLAP HIM GINNY" I yelled excitedly, she shrugged then slapped him, just then Cho Chang ran into the great hall crying and slapped him too.
"Have you been cheating on me?" asked Belle outraged then slapped him as well, and then they both disappeared.
"Oh well, that relationship wasn't going to last anyway, they were both too co-dependent" I said "Now on to our next reviewer .Alice she asks Malfoy if he likes Hermione, and if not make out with her and if so tell her in song" I said my teeth clenches
"Well no I don't like her" he said sticking his nose "I don't like mudbloods"
"Dude you Girlfriend is one" said Fred
"What? You have a girlfriend?" I asked outraged
"Wow, you're as dumb as Ron, it's you" said George
"Oh good, I mean, NO" I said "Whatever go make-out with her Malfoy"
"Fine" said Malfoy, he started to make-out with her, I dealt with it by looking away, Ron dealt with it by tackling Malfoy to the ground, and it lasted for like 5 minutes.
"Aren't you going to do something?" asked Hermione
"Um, NO, that with teach him to make-out with someone right in front of me" I said smiling
"It was a DARE" said Hermione
"I don't care, its great fun" I said
"Well I won't stand for it. PROTEGO" she said and an invisible shield popped up between Malfoy and Ron.
"Well funs over, now Mieux-mystery-otaku one of our favourites, first, Fred and George you have to drink this polyjuice potion and turn into Malfoy, and do stuff that would embarrass him" I laughed
"Awesome, so if were Malfoy, does that mean we get..." started George
"To kiss you?" finished Fred
"NO" yelled Malfoy
"Better not let Alex here you talking like that Fred" I threatened; he narrowed his eyes but became silent. They drank the potion.
"Hey, we look the same" They said at the same time.
"yeah, yeah it's hilarious, now embarrass Malfoy" I said, first Fred ran into the hall hey everybody, I have a little song to sing" said Fred "I"M A GOOFY GOOBER YA, YOU'RE A GOOFY GOOBER YA, WERE ALL GOOFY GOOBERS YA, GOOFY, GOOF, GOOBERS, GOOBERS YA" sang Fred as loud as he could everybody started pointing and laughing. He went back inside, and then George came out.
"Hey y'all" said George "I have a confession to make, I still sleep with a teddy bear and wear a diaper, also I am part elf" he said then went back in and high fived each other.
"You guys watched a very potter sequel didn't you" I said knowingly
"A little" they said "Finally we were mentioned and they portrayed Percy perfectly"
"I know, right? Wasn't it just totally awesome, it was just as good as the last one" I gushed
"Um, are we done?" asked Harry
"Yeah, yeah, okay now since this is my story and I am all powerful I am going to bring the real Cedric Diggory back" I said then snapped my fingers and her appeared
"Wha... what am I doing here?" he asked
"Oh don't worry your really dead but this is just fan fiction" I said
"Oh cool" he said
"Hey Hermione, isn't he like so hot?" I said
"Excuse me?" asked Malfoy angrily
"You heard what I said; now I will bring my reviewers into the story later just not yet" I said
"Now from HarryPotterLuver124 Draco, I mean Malfoy, you have to go swimming in the great lake and Snape is going to join you, and the giant squid will be there" I said
"WHAT?" he asked
"Come on let's go" I snapped my fingers and we were all there including Snape.
"Okay jump" I said and pushed them. They screamed like girls. Suddenly from nowhere a giant squid popped up and started to attack them.
"Maybe if were lucky Malfoy will get eaten" I said excitedly
"You and Malfoy certainly have a weird relationship" said Hermione
"Yup, okay well I guess that's enough, Malfoy was in the squids mouth but keeping it open with his legs, I snapped my fingers and we were all back in the great hall except Snape.
"And lastly Harry would you ever take a really big fan on a broomstick with you to Hogwarts if they really wanted to, she need to know for a 'friend'" I said
"Well I suppose so" shrugged Harry
"She better be far back on that broom and keeping her hands to herself" said Ginny
"Alright, now that's the end of this chapter again so sorry for not updating quicker, and did any of you see AVPS?" I asked "Okay well REVIEW"
"Please no I beg of you" said Malfoy
"SHUT IT MALFOY" I yelled at him smiling