Part 5
She has the hair curled again, and she's picking at a muffin as she packs some files into her bag.
"Hey, sweetie," he says.
"Hey."
"Feeling better?"
"Please stop asking me that."
"Okay. Just...just glad you talked to Sheldon about this whole thing."
"I didn't. Just told him I wanted to hit someone. That's all."
"Ah. Okay. And...?"
"And he gave me some phone numbers. Look, I really don't want to get into all this. Can't we just get on with our day?"
"Um, all right. So, do you want to meet me for lunch, later?"
"I'll call you."
"You'll call me?"
"I have a full day planned here, Coop. So yeah, I'll call you. That work?"
He remembers what Violet said, about choices being imposed by other people. He has to pick his battles here, and this is not one of his battles.
"Well, I have my phone. So just call me, whenever you want to, okay?"
"Great. So, I'm meeting Amelia. Can you drop me at Sam's on your way?"
He frowns. "I thought Amelia was staying with Addison."
"She is. But I'm meeting her at Sam's. Anything else you want to grill me on?"
Okay. So he needs to keep his mouth shut around her today. Noted.
He drops her off, then heads to the hospital on his way into the practice. He wants to check on the patient that so affected Charlotte, the one that triggered her issues with Addison. Pete is working the ER, and remembers her.
"Amber Haverman," he confirms. "They're releasing her today. She was in bad shape, Cooper. You might not want to..."
"No, I have to see."
"Suit yourself. I'll take you."
Pete stands there in the doorway, waits for him as he goes in. The girl is tiny, very young, very scared. She has blonde hair, like Charlotte has. A bandage on one arm, and a cast on the other. That same pattern of bruises underneath her eyes...
"Hey, sweetheart," he says gently.
The girl looks at him, tears up.
"I'm Dr. Freedman. I heard that you were in here, and I just wanted to check in on you before they send you home today. Make sure you have all the help you need."
The girl's lip trembles, then she nods.
"I heard you had to have a few procedures. I wanted to make sure you were feeling okay, now that they were done."
And Amber Haverman shakes her head, eyes tearing up again. "Guess they didn't tell you what the procedures were, did they? If they had? You wouldn't think I could be okay..."
He leaves the hospital, and he has to talk to someone. He's feeling fidgety, nervous, just like Charlotte was this morning. He can't keep still. He drums his hands on the steering wheel, and he just sits there for a second feeling like has to talk to someone, but who? Charlotte is out, for obvious reasons. Violet, as his friend? Sheldon, as his therapist? What does he need?
It's solved for him when he goes in, heads into the kitchen area, tries to pour himself a cup of coffee and drops his mug.
"Damn it!"
"Well," says a dry, calm voice. "Sounds like someone's off to a good morning..."
He looks up at Naomi's gentle, maternal face and at last has had enough. She manages to pull him into her office before he finally breaks down, and then she sits and watches while he weeps into his hands.
When she thinks he's collected himself, she pats his arm. "All right, Cooper. Let's talk."
He tells her more than he plans, about Charlotte and Addison, and the transference thing that Violet mentioned.
"This is good to know," Naomi says. "They work together here. We'll have to keep an eye on them."
"It's bigger than that."
"Of course it is. Because you were there that night too, right? And if she can put this on Addison, she can put it on you just as easily?"
"Naomi, I can't talk to her about this."
"Well, I think you're going to have to. You can't carry this around, Coop."
"Well, sure I can. She's managing to. So why shouldn't I?"
"Because you'll snap, same as she's going to, and then you'll make things even worse, for both of you. Let me put this to you another way. Before this happened, is this the kind of feeling you would have shared with her?"
"Before this happened, it wouldn't have been an issue."
"Sure it would. Maybe not this specific feeling, about this specific problem. But about something else, maybe. An issue comes up in how you two are functioning, interpersonally. You feel anxious and concerned. Would you tell her?"
"Probably."
"So, you tell her now. Cooper, part of what has her so on edge right now is feeling like she's everybody's project. Showing her that you still feel like you can lean on her may be good for her."
"I just don't want to put anything else on her right now. She's still so...so fragile..."
"Maybe. But underneath that, she's still her. She's still your tough, brave, bossy but sensitive Charlotte. And she'd want to be there for you if you were hurting."
That's something to think about. But then, he knows how tired she is of talking about what's happened. How will she feel if it turns out he has issues too?
She calls him just before noon and demands lunch.
"Burgers, barbecue, something proper. You meet me," she says.
"Okay. I'm just finishing up with some files. You want to just come here and wait?"
"No, I don't just want to come there and wait Coop, I want you to meet me!"
"You know, you can't avoid Addison forever."
"Didn't say I was trying to. Look, do you want lunch, or not?"
He sighs. "All right. That grill place, near the hospital? Half an hour?"
"Make it twenty minutes. I have meetings."
"With whom?"
"Twenty minutes. If you're not there, I start without you."
As he figured this morning; it's his day to keep his mouth shut.
In spite of her telephone grumpiness, she's all smiles when he gets there. A little too smiley, actually. She puts down her menu when he sits -he had to hustle to get there by her deadline, and she's evidently beat him to it- and gives him a smile that's a little too put-on and calculated.
"So?" she says. "You have a good morning?"
"I had an okay morning," he says.
"Oh?"
"We can talk about it later. How about you?"
"Oh, just swell, thanks. I'm starving. How about you get the onion rings, I get the fries, and we split 'em?"
"Charlotte..."
"Well, fine. I'll get the fries AND the onion rings."
"Babe..."
"No. You're saying my name like you want to talk all serious, and I am just flat out not in the mood. I had a good morning. Let's not poke that bunny just now, you hear me?"
"I'm just worried about you."
"Yeah, you always seem to be. Well? Are you getting the onion rings, or ain't ya?"
It's his day to keep his mouth shut, he tells himself again. Boy, is it ever.
He drops her back at the hospital, then heads straight back into the office and directly to Sheldon.
"Twice in one day," Sheldon muses. "Huh. And I thought she was the one who needed the therapy..."
"Very funny."
"I try. So?"
"She's manic," he complains.
"Is that a professional diagnosis?"
"Well, you tell me. She spends the nights quaking in the bed, wracked with nightmares or flashbacks or whatever the hell they are, so bad she can't sleep, she can't touch me, she can't do anything but lie there and pretend she's not crying. Then she wakes up in the morning all 'I'm over that' and plotting violence against Violet and Addison. And then I see her at lunchtime and she's all chipper and smiley and with the appetite of a lumberjack. Isn't that a little manic-sounding, to you?"
"It's a little PTSD-sounding, actually. Cooper, what you have here is a woman in desperate search for a coping strategy. She'll try them all on until she finds one that works."
"Naomi saw me this morning. I dropped a coffee mug. We chatted for a bit."
"And?"
"And she said I should try and be honest right now. That Charlotte needs to see me treating her just like I did before, and that means telling her I'm having trouble with this."
"Fair enough. So, did you try it?"
"I wanted to. But she just keeps telling me she doesn't want to talk today. She said she'd rather not poke the bunny just now."
"Well, that's fair enough too. Might there be a compromise here?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean pat the bunny, but don't poke it. Admit that you do need to talk, but tell her you'll do it with me until she's ready to hear it?"
He nods slowly. "That might work."
"And Cooper?"
"Yes, Sheldon?"
"When I say talk to me, I mean ME, you understand? Leave Violet out of this. Leave Naomi out of it too. Let Charlotte have as much space -as much privacy- as you can give her. Okay?"
"Yeah. Thanks, Sheldon."
"Call me tonight, if you need to. Nights are more difficult, I think. For both of you."
"Yeah."
"So, call me. Okay?"
And it is okay. He feels so alone right now. It's nice to have a friend in this.