When you're gone. (chapter 24)
Here it is! A new chapter! And it's coming straight from the computer. I have taken a lot of time to get this ready as I'm preparing for my final
exams and I'm really trying to find energy to do anything else than preparing for my exams (they are literally sucking all the energy out of me) so
writing have been kind of hard for me. BUT I promise you that you will get some totally unexpected in this chapter and I was crying while writing
it.
IMPORTANT: This chapter has a special song that really sets the mood. It's not for the whole chapter so I have made a short note when you should
start listening to it.
Song: When you're gone by Avril Lavigne.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight series and I'm not Avril Lavigne, I'm just a teenage girl with a massive fear for exams.
Warning: may cause you to cry, so don't read this if you're wearing makeup and are going to a party!
We had been so excited when we finally had found the right dress, but there was a problem; I was too big for it right now. I stared at the amazing
dress and I felt so sad that I couldn't wear it for my wedding with a stomach this big. As I was about to go and look for another dress, my phone
started ringing wildly. Of course EVERYONE in the store looked at me when it started to ring and I just hate to be the center of attention. I cursed
silently as I whipped it out of my pocket and looked at the display "JACOB." there stood. "Hi Jacob, what's up?" I just said casually to him and his deep
voice answered; "Kayla wanted me to tell you that you're due before the wedding, so you can wear whatever dress you wants to, oh and you will be
in your normal size after giving birth. That's all." He finished lamely. The news made me do a happy little dance on the inside and with a smile in my I
said enthusiastically; "oh thanks for telling me, this is great!" clearly he didn't expect this reaction from me so the farewell was a bit like this; "oh um
I'm glad that you're uh… happy about it… um bye, I love you." Click. That was the goodbye from a VERY confused Jacob Black. Smiling I shook my head
and turned around to get my dress, it didn't take long to find the right size and get to the cashier so I could buy the dress. The cashier was a young
woman with a friendly face "Oh what a good choice! This dress will be beautiful to your wedding; I really hope you will get a fantastic day!" she
seemed genuinely excited for me and sent me a happy smile. Like most of the demons in Nature Ville, she treated everyone nicely. I gave her the
money and she handed me the dress in a bag and I left with the girls. On our way back to the house we were chatting happily about the wedding and
talked about the other dresses in the store.
It was late and I had just gotten in bed, when Jacob jumped through the window. "Don't use the front door anymore huh?" I asked him with a raised
eyebrow, he shrugged "didn't feel like waking Charlie, he fell asleep during a game. It's kind of hard to get thru the door without making noise, when
the floor is covered with shoes." He smiled to me and undressed quickly, then hurried under the covers. A warm hand rested on my stomach and I felt
an arm sneak around me. I turned to him and smiled lovingly to him, and then I softly kissed his face. He kissed my hands and whispered to me; "I love
you so much. You're like the wind in the trees on a summer day. You're the sun that brightens the dark times. You're the one who keeps my heart
beating. Bella, to me, you mean life. I love you so much that my heart might explode of love." I looked up at him and whispered back; "I love you too,
if I ever lost you, I would die. My heart would stop beating. You're the only person that knows me better than I do myself. Without you nothing
matters anymore." There were tears in his eyes and he whispered passionately back; "I promise, I will never ever leave you. Even if I should be
somewhere else for a while, I will be back here A.S.A.P. I can't live without you for more than a few days." For some reason I could just see the truth
in his eyes when he said these words and he saw the truth in me when I whispered back; "The same here, Jacob." We talked a little more and fell
asleep while hugging.
AN: listen to the song.
The next morning I woke up as someone knocked on the door. "JAKE, BELLA HURRY UP!" a voice yelled. In no time we were both dressed and down
the stairs. Everyone where gathered in the kitchen, but unlike usually there wasn't a happy atmosphere. Instead there was a deadly silence and Sam
had a grave expression that shouted `bad news folks.´ to me, the others looked worried. As we sat down Sam took a deep breath and said; "people I
have some news that will make you sad," he closed his eyes and put his hand on his forehead "I have caught the trail of a big group of newborn
vampires. They are a threat to the humans and it's very urgent that we find them and kill them. We leave right after breakfast so we don't have much
time, I'm sorry." Everyone started murmuring furiously and shoveled food on their plates in an amazing speed. When everybody were done with
breakfast the pack stood up and said goodbye, the imprinters looked sadder than the rest of the pack. As I said bye to Jacob my eyes got misty and I
whispered with a broken and regretful voice; "I wish you could stay here." He shook his head and looked at me in a way that revealed the pain he felt
as he had to leave. "Don't get hurt, I can't stand to live without you." I sobbed "I won't be hurt, I promise." he answered and hugged me tightly. Just
then Sara and the others came over to say bye to Jacob and the pack wanted to say bye to me. I hugged all of them and stared Sam in the eye "you
better bring my boys back in one piece. Promise me, as I can't go and take care of them you got to do it." the look on Sam's face was serious and filled
with responsibility "I will Bella. And I trust you to keep the others safe back here." He answered me, nodded and gritted my teeth to prevent my
crying.
They had just left. I could still see them as they ran towards the forest in human form, along with me stood Sara, Joshua, Emily and Jasmine. Sara and
Joshua had stayed behind to help me if I should give birth all of sudden. As Jacob reached the forest, he turned around and looked at me, and then he
disappeared between the trees. As we walked inside the house, hot tears started to roll down my cheeks "mom, you alright?" Sara asked me, she
looked shocked when I looked up at her "I miss him. It feels like my heart is breaking, in my chest there is this big hole and it's killing Me." my voice
was so broken and weak, just like me. Sara quickly guided me into my bedroom and made me lie down, as she was about to stand up, I grabbed her
hand "please don't leave. I need someone to be here with me." I pleaded her.
Sarah's POV
I stared at the woman I saw as my mom, there was something wrong with her "Mom, you alright?" I asked her. As she looked up at me a terrible sight
met my eyes; her cheeks had tearstains and new tears were spilling from her eyes, but that wasn't the worst; it was the pain in her eyes, the hurt
from a broken heart; a heart that longed for the person that had captured it. I was scared of what I saw; this wasn't my mom. My mom was a strong
woman, she never cried like this, she was always happy and full of love, and she never broke down like this. The woman in front of me looked like my
mom but she didn't act like her. Soon I realized that this really was my mom, but it was a new side of her. A new side that I didn't knew before. She
whispered sadly that she missed Jacob, my dad. Making a quick decision, I grabbed her arm and guided her into her room.
When I had made her lie down, I was about to leave for some napkins when a hand suddenly grabbed mine. "Please don't leave. I need someone to
be here with me." She pleaded me. I couldn't believe it my mom was actually pleading me to stay! I silently cursed Victoria this was all her fault! I
hope she is burning up in hell! I gently looked at her and said: "I'm just leaving for a second. We need some napkins, I'll be back in no time okay?" she
nodded like a little child – a lost child. I hurried outside the room and grabbed a pack of napkins, when Charlie joined me back to the bedroom. The
look on his face was sad, when he saw Bella: she was laying on the bed curled into a tight ball; my mom was wearing one of my dad's used sweaters.
Her face was tearstained and she kept sniffing the sweater and sobbing. The way she acted was doing something strange to me it made me sad and I
felt sympathy for her and my father. He surely missed her just as badly as she missed him and I understood her. I would be hurting too if I had to stay
away from Joshua for too long, I'd break down too.
Cautiously I walked towards the bed; my mom looked up at me with sad eyes. I couldn't help it; I sat carefully down, next to her and patted my lap,
just like I remembered her doing when I was little. She obliged and put her head in my lap, I stroked her hair with gentle movement as she cried. I
remembered her doing this when I was sad, once I got my favorite doll stolen and I was devastated over the loss. Being the amazing person that she
is, my mom spent the whole day comforting me like this and now it was my turn to pay her back for all the good things she have done for me in the
past few years. The whole world owes my mom for what she does, she takes care of so many things and she has been helping so many people, even
though most of them don't know it. In my opinion it wasn't fair that she was hurting like this, she deserved to be happy all the time…
Bella's POV
The pain was unbearable. All I could think of was Jacob, my Jacob. Even if I didn't close my eyes I could see his face in front of me and it was so painful
to not being able to reach out and touch him. I looked around and saw his sweater on the floor, not having the energy to stand up and grab it I used
my powers to levitate it over to me. I quickly pulled it on and felt a bit better as his smell surrounded me but the hole in me still hurt. I kept sniffing to
the cloth and sobbed as I longed for him to come back home and hold me tight in his arms. In my misery I curled into a ball and hugged myself, I had
never ever imagined how painful it truly would be to be separated from Jacob. I had always been so independent of other people, but right now I felt
so weak and lonely I just longed for Jacob. Only he could make the pain go away. Every minute felt like an hour and an hour was like a day to me, time
went by so slowly right now.
Sarah had been here for me for hours, just padding my hair. She hadn't said a word in the whole time. Me; well I was a wreck. I had just been crying
and crying the whole time while sobbing; "I miss him so much. It hurts so badly." Wow I'm really out of character right now. Finally I got a hold of
myself and said sniffling to Sarah; "you got to go down and eat something. I don't want you to starve yourself." She hesitated "But mom what about
you? You're the one who is pregnant." I smiled and said with a cracking voice; "will you bring me some food? I don't have the energy to leave the
room right now." She looked skeptically at me for a few seconds before standing up and leaving the room. I curled into a ball again and stared into the
air. I closed my eyes and let the tears fall freely again, I had an amazing amount of tears left and my eyes weren't sore at all yet. After a little while I
heard footsteps outside the room and Sarah came inside carrying a bowl of soup, she handed it to me and I started eating it without the biggest
appetite when I finally finished the bowl I felt weird. "Mom you're okay?" Sarah asked me, she was looking really scared I nodded while frowning;
"yeah I think so… I just feel a little funny." She walked out with the bowls. I had never felt this feeling before so I felt a bit curious. i focused on the
feeling and searched in my inner self. First I looked on my connections with others; it wasn't from the people I love and care about, it originated from
me. "Well at least I got that settled." I thought and started to search for the feelings reason. Strangely enough it seemed to come from my magical
powers. "What the hell is going on?" I thought feeling very confused and then I understood; my magic was trying to help me! I relaxed and gave into
the power. As I opened my eyes, I felt unnaturally drowsy and willingly lay down. A strange greyish mist started to cover my eyes and my heart rate
started to slow down. I was going into a trance made by myself. It was weird; my body shut down and only ran on a minimum use of energy, but my
mind was more active than ever before. As I closed my eyes, I could see everything that was going on in the house. I was using my magic in a whole
new way. My heart didn't hurt anymore and I could all of sudden see the pack in the forest; they were fighting the vampires and I immediately
searched for Jacob. The thing I saw pissed me off; there was three vampires trying to circle my Jacob! That made me MAD!
Then I got an idea; well since I couldn't help them physically, I could still use my magic and give them a little hand. I smirked and looked at the first
vampire. A tree root suddenly came up from the ground and wrapped around his foot. He screamed in a very girly way. The tree dragged him under
the earth and started to rip him apart; forming a mouth close to a big bonfire it spat out the pieces as another tree root grabbed a new vampire and
dragged him under.
I JUST LOVE MAGIC! I grinned to myself. Soon I was dragging vampires underground very quickly and boy it was funny to see the confused faces of
the wolves when their vampires all of sudden disappeared into the ground and then they saw a mouth of dirt spitting pieces out on the bonfire they
had made. Soon there weren't so many vampires left and I returned to watch over the house and the village. I still kept an eye on things, but staying
away from your body for too long, was really tiring for me. So I returned to my body and rested a bit, I was waiting for the pack to come home again.
See this soul-body-trance thing have a little malfunction; you sort of can't get out of the trance without your partner/soul mate. That means that I
can't become "alive" again before Jacob comes home and touch me physically. If Jacob should die while I'm in my trance I can't get out of the trance
again ever. So now it's just about waiting for him.
Sarah's POV
There hadn't been a sound from Bella for a long time. She had all of sudden fallen asleep after dinner, but I didn't mind it; maybe she would get some
peace in her sleep. I sat in the living room along with Charlie, Joshua and the imprinted non-magical girls. We were talking when Matthew suddenly
came inside "Hi I hope I'm not interrupting you in anything, but I really need to see Bella. I know she isn't feeling too good, but it's very important."
He looked like he was in a hurry and his facial expression was more serious than usually so I decided to wake up my mom.
My mom was still asleep when I got inside her room. She looked like she was relaxed and didn't feel any pain at all. I hated myself for having to wake
her up from her peaceful sleep. I carefully shook her shoulder "mom wake up… mom wake up." I whispered and shook her lightly. I got no response
from her, it worried me; she usually slept rather lightly "mom, come on wake up! Mommy you have to wake up right now!" I said a little louder
and she just slept on. Now I was getting scared; I checked her pulse and to my horror was it way lower than it should be, I listened to her heart and
heard the slow rhythm it had "no, no, no this is not good, not good at all!" I was really freaking out now "CHARLIE! MATTHEW!
JOSHUA! HELP ME!" I screamed out of the door. My heart was beating like crazy, and I started to hyperventilate. Everyone came running
into the room "Sarah what's wrong?" Charlie asked me, he knew I never freaked out for fun. "I-its Be-Bella… she won't wake u-up… her pulse is too
low and her breathing is too slow for sleeping!" I was on the edge of crying, this was just too much creepy and scary stuff, that happened on the same
time. I was educated to handle vampires, not mothers with broken hearts and scary behavior! Matthew was kneeling down next to the bed "She's
right; Bella's pulse, heart beating rate and breathing is too low for a human being." The look on his face was dark as he said those words. I started to
cry out loud.
So a brand new chapter! Tell me what you think about the chapter. Oh and I haven't gotten it beta'ed so don't be mad over spelling mistakes or
weird sentences. Please wish me good luck, I need it and I would feel a lot more confident if I know you guys support me!
Thanks for reading! I have a personal message down below!
I wanted to talk about something I think is important and have affected me a lot: bullying.
See a few years ago I was bullied and it really hurts to be bullied. In my case it was mostly verbally but it still affected me a lot. For an instance I
have had a hard time letting people in and I have from time to time a really low self-esteem. I think my case was a mild one compared to other
cases, but no matter what does bullying have a great effect on the person being bullied and the people around them. The people who does bully
others might not have an idea of how big damage it can make to their victims. Today I'm not being bullied anymore but my parents was seriously
contemplating to make me change school and I wasn't the only kid being bullied or harassed; a lot of the other kids were also tired of the bullies
and many parents actually complained to the principal about those boys. My way to deal with it was shutting other people out, often I didn't want
to tell my parents if I had been bullied and they often had to drag it out of me.
There is a lot to bullying and I just told you the big pieces of my experience with being bullied, but I have a message to you: don't be bullies! And if
you see someone who is bullying another person, STEP IN! Often bullies aren't expecting to have someone who will start to defend the victim and
talk back to them. Don't be scared of the bullies; instead try making them feel guilty about what they do, and if you step in you might get a great
friend. If you start to talk back to the bullies some of the others might do that too.
So if you are against bullying; SHOW IT!
If someone of you out there wants, to say out loud, what you think of bullying and bullies, feel free to tell it, in the comment section.
Or if you have an experience with being bullied, or bullying you can write it, in the comments.
To those of you who want to be anonymous, you can choose to leave a review, unsigned; don't let fear hold you back!
Thank you for reading my story, for any comments you might leave and good luck with stopping bullying!