Sequel/Series: Yes --pouting-- I wasn't planning on a series or sequel but it would seem my muse has other ideas.
Feedback: Love it.
Beta: Yes! Thanks so much to Penny, Ellex, and Kerensa. Any further errors are my own.
Summary: Rodney's lessons lead to a decision.
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He knew all about being alone, whether he was physically by himself in an empty lab, walking down the streets of a crowded city among strangers, or working side by side with those he had once called friends.
Dr. Rodney McKay knew all about being on his own, had known about being isolated since childhood and often used it as a barrier to keep others away. He'd never been able to follow the ever changing nuances of people moving from one social group to another, or the constant reshaping of group dynamics whose attentions and interests always seemed to change on a whim. Poor social skills on his part meant he had always found himself on the outside of whatever social grouping he stumbled into. The periphery of any gatherings had become safe territory over the years, no matter how much he hated it. Any step out of that singular, distant orbit had only ever brought bitter disappointment and humiliating rejection.
He had thought going to a different galaxy would change that, and for awhile he had found those around him challenging his intimidation techniques and actually interested in getting a look at the man behind the walls. The man behind the curtain. Yet, once again, they were pulling away from him. It was as if what they had glimpsed behind those fortifications were shadows with no substance, bluster and no courage,intelligence but no soul. Technically correct but without any artistry.
Standing out on a deserted balcony, Rodney held the letter tightly in his hand so the wind wouldn't steal it away. With an aching chest and clenching gut, he gave careful consideration to the neatly printed words on the crisp, white paper. Black and white, paper and ink; it was all so simple. Yet the words engraved upon the page had opened new possibilities and the chance to escape the one place he might have called home.
The Chinese government wanted him to head their off-world science division and they had offered him everything he could want. Personnel, equipment, a shockingly huge budget, unilateral control and access to several highly technologically advanced races and their toys. They were making serious and well thought out plans for their place in the exploration of new technologies and he was their first pick. Not second and not third. No one else had been offered this tantalizing position. They wanted him and they were willing to offer whatever it took to get him. If, that is, he was willing to return to the Milky Way Galaxy.
Rodney recognized the offer for what it was, a chance to start over with his fortifications well in place and the understanding of what happened when he allowed those walls to come down. There he wouldn't be made the butt end of jokes and his opinions wouldn't be carelessly tossed aside like so much trash.
Meticulously he folded the letter, replaced it in the envelope and tucked it into the pocket inside his jacket. Atlantis was beautiful and a once in a life time opportunity - but Atlantis had also made it known he wasn't wanted. Needed perhaps, but Rodney found being needed was a poor substitution for being wanted.
He turned and quietly left.
--end