A/N I have posted an outtake to this story called Forgiveness. It is Bella and Edwards arrival in Denali from Jasper's POV. What was he thinking when he knew he would be reunited with Bella for the first time since her birthday? Read it and tell me what you think!

Edward

As we sat together on the couch I could not seem to keep my hands to myself. I had to touch her skin, her hair. I needed the reassurance that she was here with me, that she was safe. I ran my fingers through the silk of her hair, brushed my fingers across the satin of her skin. I laid my hand on her leg and felt her startle. When I looked into her face I noticed a slight frown marring her lovely features and wished again that I could hear her thoughts.

"What's wrong?" I said in a whisper.

"Nothing really. I just remembered that I really need to take a shower and change my clothes." Her cheeks turned the delightful shade of pink that I loved so much and I could not help but grin at her.

"You are beautiful no matter what you wear, silly girl. But if you want a shower go ahead. I am sure Alice can find you something to wear." I looked over to Alice for confirmation and she smiled.

I have just the thing Edward.

"Oh yes Bella, I have plenty of things for you to wear. Come on. Let's go upstairs and I will get something for you while you shower."

Alice moved to stand in front of Bella and taking her by the hand pulled her into a standing position. They moved to the stairs and Bella followed Alice's sprightly step with a more sedate one.

I watched her go and instantly felt her loss. I looked over at Jasper and he was smirking at me.

It doesn't really get any easier to watch them walk away, man. But it makes it that much sweeter when they come back. He gave me a sly grin and I smiled back.

I could only handle sitting downstairs for another fifteen minutes before the need to see her again overwhelmed me. Jasper just shook his head at me as I got up and went towards the stairs. Tomorrow I would give her more space. Tonight I needed her presence. It had been a long day and I felt calmer when she was around me.

When I reached my room I did not hear the shower running and assumed that she was dressing. I was standing in the middle of the room when I heard the knob turn and the door open. I looked up and time stopped.

Bella walked out of the bathroom, a cloud of fragrant steam rolling out in front of her. Her sweet scent mixed with her shampoo permeated the air and sent my senses reeling. She was clad only in a white towel that stopped mid-thigh. Her skin was flushed pink from the hot water and looked so soft and warm I felt my body respond instantly. I wanted her. I needed her. Lust filled my mind and overrode my logic. I had to have her. I stared at her, our eyes locked together, and saw the same yearning in her eyes. I could smell the sudden bloom of her arousal and I drew the sweet smell deep into my lungs. It pushed every thought from my head. Every thought except her. I moved towards her, ready to claim her as my own and she step towards me, her eyes echoing the longing in mine.

"Bella!" Alice's voice pierced the edge of my consciousness. I froze where I was. I could hear Alice's thoughts as they pushed the haze of desire from my brain.

Edward! You have to stop! There is no way either of you are ready for what I just saw in your future. Go downstairs and let Jasper calm you down.

I didn't move. I was still wrapped in my haze but I could feel rational control slowly coming back to me. I had never felt such an overpowering desire before.

EDWARD! You need to go downstairs! NOW! Alice's thoughts broke me out of my trance and I turned and left the room before my desires could take a hold of me again.

I quickly made my way downstairs and walked out onto the porch. I sat down on the top step and dropped my head, my hands running through my hair. I had to get myself under control. I could feel my body shaking as I tried to bring myself back to normal. I could not believe how quickly the rational part of my brain had been overcome by desire. I'd never felt such a primal force before.

I felt a wave of calm pour over me and looked up to see Jasper standing next to me. He dropped down to sit next to me on the step and put his hand on my shoulder. I instantly felt more composed.

I know you are probably kicking your own ass right now but everything you are feeling is perfectly normal, Edward.

I gaped at him. "Jasper, I could have seriously hurt her. I have never been so completely consumed by lust like that. It shut down the rational side of my brain totally. I can never lose control with her like that. You know that." I was disgusted with myself.

Jasper felt my disgust and pushed another wave of tranquility on me.

It is natural Edward. She is beautiful and you love her. Wanting her physically is just another aspect of that love. You have been repressing the physical side of your nature for so long that you are bound to slip up. The problem is that you have too much control.

"Too much control? What are you talking about? If I don't control myself she dies. I don't think there is such a thing as too much control."

Which is exactly why you were overcome before. You can't suppress everything forever without exploding at some point. You need to let some of your control go in order to become stronger.

I stared at him in bemusement. "I don't understand. How can losing control make me stronger?" It made no sense to me.

I didn't say lose control, Edward. I said let some of it go. You have set up so many boundaries and you need to let some of them drop. I'll bet you have never even gotten to second base have you? Jasper was grinning.

"I don't see how that is any of your business, Jasper." I said in indignation.

That's what I thought. Geez Edward you have got to loosen up. Touching her is not going to kill her, you have proven that. I rolled my eyes.

Besides, she wants you to touch her as much as you want to touch her. Trust me, I know. I can feel it rolling off of her every time you two are together.

"Really?" I asked. I could not believe that she felt the same overpowering desire that I did.

Yes, really. Think about that. Now go upstairs. We can talk more about this tomorrow, when Bella is not around to distract you. He smirked at me.

"Thanks Jazz. I needed that." I clapped him on the shoulder and walked back into the house.

I was more thankful than ever that Jasper was my brother. He loved to tease me but I knew I could always count on his advice. And I needed some. I needed to know how to control myself better. We definitely needed to talk tomorrow.

I went back upstairs and heard Bella moving around in the bathroom. I turned down the covers on her side of the bed and sat down on top. Bella opened the door and I saw a fleeting look of surprise cross her features. She climbed up onto the bed and curled into me. She draped her arm over my waist and pressed her head into my shoulder. The fragrance of her hair and skin flowed over me. I wrapped one arm around her and traced my fingers over her arm with the other. Her skin felt like velvet under my sensitive fingertips. I could still feel the same yearning for her that I had before but I was in control again. Now the strongest feeling I had was the intense love I had for the glorious creature wrapped in my arms. I was basking in her presence when she spoke.

"I'm sorry about before. I didn't know you would be in here and Alice didn't leave my pajamas in the bathroom for me." Her voice was apologetic and I could sense the blood that rushed to her cheeks. Of course she would feel the need to apologize when it was my fault. I stroked her warm cheeks with the back of my fingers.

"I'm the one who should be apologizing. I should have waited before coming upstairs. I didn't mean to catch you in that state of undress." I pressed my face against her damp hair.

"It's okay. It's not like I was naked." I had to use every ounce of willpower I had to crush the images of Bella naked that burst into my brain. I had never seen her completely unclothed but I had seen enough to know that she would be exquisite. I forced my mind back to present time.

"Besides, some of the things that Alice tries to put me in are more revealing than that towel." She laughed softly and I joined her, glad to lighten the mood.

"Anyways, it doesn't matter. So, what did you do today?" She asked.

"You mean before becoming completely panic-stricken when I could not contact you and then angering you with my lack of faith in you?" I said teasingly. It felt better to laugh about what had happened than to dwell on it.

"Yes, before that." She replied lightly.

"Well, after I left you this morning I went hunting and then went to talk to Carlisle."

"Oh, what did you talk about?"

"I took your advice and decided to forgive myself about what happened between us but I wasn't sure how to go about it. So I talked to Carlisle and he helped me." I said in an offhand way, though I felt so much more at ease since talking to him.

"What did he say?" I could hear the curiosity in her voice.

"Hmm, well he basically told me that if I didn't let this go it would poison our entire relationship. And that I needed to focus on us now-right now-and let everything else go. He pointed out all the ways that we have both grown and changed and that even though it hurt us both so much, our separation has actually strengthened our relationship. That there will always be things that remind us of that time but that we should use those things to remind us how much better we are together than we are apart."

Bella's expression was one of shock. Then a slow smile began to form. She startled me when she raised her voice and spoke.

"Carlisle, you are officially my new favorite person!"

I heard Carlisle and Esme laughing in the study and Emmett's booming laugh echoed through the house. Alice and I had the same thought at the same time and called out in tandem.

"Hey what about me?!" We both said in feigned indignation.

Bella shook as laughter overtook her small frame. I loved the sound of her unrestrained laughter. Her joy filled me with joy. Even after all this time and everything we'd had to endure to get to this point I could not believe that this captivating woman had chosen me. And continued to choose me. I had never felt such happiness, even from what I could remember of my human life.

I had distanced myself from my vampire family over the last decades. It was not a completely conscious decision; everyone had always been so wrapped up in their significant others that I had kept away to allow them time to be together. I could see now that I had been losing some of the humanity that I had clung so desperately to all those years. Being with Bella had opened me up, had unleashed all those pent up emotions and they had completely overtaken me. I was filled with so much love and contentment. I could understand now why my family said I had changed so much. Never before had I been so unrestrained with my love and affection. And I had Bella to thank for that.

I stared down into her eyes as her laughter died down. I could not help the tender smile that formed across my face. Bella read my expression and looked up at me with such love and adoration that I was swept up in a wave of joyfulness. I bent and kissed her soft lips, hoping to convey all the devotion I felt to this amazing woman.

I lifted my head and she nestled closer into my embrace. I began to hum to her and she quickly fell asleep.

I stared down at her as she slept, her features peaceful. Much as I did every night while she lay sleeping in my arms I whispered my love to her. I told her how empty my life had been before I had met her and how I had never even realized it. How my heart had been searching for her all these years and how she filled every empty space within me that I never even knew existed. I told her of the crushing despair I had felt when I left her and the overwhelming joy I had felt when I saw her in Rio and realized that she still wanted to be with me. I apologized over and over again for all the pain I had caused her. How I was working to forgive myself like she asked but how I would never forget how much I had hurt her and how I would never stop trying to make it up to her. In the dark I recounted to her how I felt when I realized I loved her and how I would love her for the rest of my existence.

She only spoke in her sleep only once, to murmur my name.

"Edward…" My ears tuned into her sleepy voice. I loved it when she said my name in her sleep, wishing as I always did that I could join her in her dreams.

"Yours…forever…" she sighed.

My chest clenched. Forever. It had such a different meaning to me than it did her. And it had a different meaning to me now than it ever had before. Before forever had meant a never ending string of days and nights, repeating the same cycle I'd been repeating for decades. Now my life was tied to the heartbeat of the woman in my arms. The same crushing pain I had felt when I spoke to Carlisle in Denali hit me. I of course knew rationally that she would die one day. She was human and death was a fact of her existence. But emotionally I knew that I would never ever be able to prepare myself for the day that happened. I knew I would never be able to exist without her.

You could change her. The voice in my head said. Then she would be with you forever.

'No!' I answered the voice back. 'I can't steal her soul from her. No matter how much I want her with me forever."

It's what she wants. She has told you that already.

'Because she doesn't understand what this life is like. She doesn't know the horror of what being a vampire is truly like.'

It's not as though you have ever tried to explain it to her either. You know she is a lot stronger than you have ever given her credit for.

'How can she want this? With all the suffering that comes with this life, how can she want to become what I am?'

Because she loves you and wants to be with you forever. And you are focusing on the bad parts of your existence. What about the benefits?

'Benefits?' I scoffed to the voice. 'What benefits?'

Hmm, how about having the woman you love beside you for all eternity? Knowing that the love she feels for you will last forever. Knowing that you have an unending amount of time to show her how much you love her. Those sound like benefits to me.

I was stunned. I had never looked at it that way before. I had always been focused on how much I would be taking from her. Of how much she stood to lose by choosing to be with me as a vampire. And I would be taking so much from her. Her family, her friends, the ability to have children.

But you would be giving her what she wants…you. The voice replied to my inner musings.

'How can that be enough? How can I ever be enough to take the place of everything she has ever known?'

If your positions were reversed would she be enough for you, enough for forever?

'Of course she would be.' My reply was immediate and automatic.

Then there is your answer, isn't it?

I was staggered. The answer was so simple and so complicated at the same time. I wanted her forever but taking her life was such a selfish act. How could I do that to her? Just for my own selfishness?

I was drawn from my musings by the sun slowly rising, lightening the sky. Another morning was upon us. I could hear the changes in Bella's heartbeat that told me she would be waking soon.

I looked down into her beautiful face as her eyelids fluttered open. She was so endearing, her eyes soft with sleep. She smiled at me and tightened her arms around me. Suddenly her eyes widened and she gasped. I could hear her heartbeat speeding up. I looked down at her in concern.

"Something wrong my love?" I asked.

"Uh, no. I just, uh, need a human moment." Her voice was unsteady and I wondered if she was ill.

I let her get up and she moved quickly into the bathroom. Was she alright? I heard the water from the sink turn on and a soft splashing sound. I listened to her heartbeat gradually slow down and her respiration went back to normal. I decided to give her some privacy and got dressed to go downstairs. I heard Alice outside the room.

"Yes Alice?"

I have some clothes for Bella when she gets out of the bathroom.

I opened the door and she walked in and placed a sweater and pair of pants on the bed.

"Thanks Alice."

She just shrugged and walked out of the room and down the stairs into the kitchen. I heard her greet Jasper and then rummage around in the cabinets.

I walked over to the bathroom door and knocked softly.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"I'm fine thanks." Her voice sounded normal.

"I'm going to go downstairs. I'll see you when you come down." I said.

"Ok, I'll be down in a minute." She said softly.

"Alice left you something to wear on the bed."

"Tell her thanks for me." She said gratefully.

"Alright, see you in a few." I said, turning and walking out of the bedroom.

I moved downstairs and into the kitchen. Jasper was leaning against the counter while Alice turned towards the coffeemaker that Esme had purchased to complete the look of the kitchen.

I could smell the foul scent of burnt coffee beans and water. It assaulted my senses. How could humans drink that stuff?

"Why are you making coffee Alice?"

"Bella will want it when she comes downstairs." Alice replied.

"You know Bella has a low tolerance for caffeine. Why would she want that?"

"I don't know. I just had a vision of her drinking it here in the kitchen." Alice was singing The Battle Hymn of the Republic in French in her head so I knew there was something she was not telling me.

I heard the bedroom door close and soft footsteps make their way downstairs and into the kitchen. Her warm sweet scent hit me before she walked into the room and I looked over to see her smile at me. I took the coffee cup from Alice and walked over to her, kissing her on the cheek before handing it to her.

"Alice said you would want that." I still could not believe that she would want to drink this revolting drink.

She sipped it, looking over at Alice and smiling.

"What would you like to do today, love?" I asked as I leaned back against the counter and crossed my arms across my chest. Bella looked me up and down and I heard Jasper clear his throat behind me. Bella sent him an apologetic look but he was singing Dixie in his head so I could not hear his thoughts as he grinned and winked at her.

I was about to ask what was going on when Alice interrupted.

"Actually Bella and I have an appointment in Port Angeles. We are going to have to leave soon if we want to make it there on time." Alice was still humming in her head and I was instantly suspicious.

"An appointment for what?" I asked.

"An appointment at a salon. Bella needs a haircut before we start school and I want us to get a manicure and a pedicure too. We are having a girl's day!" Alice's voice reflected her delight.

This is the last time we get to have a day together before school starts Edward. Don't ruin it!

I looked at Bella and she was nodding in agreement with Alice.

"Oh, I thought we might spend a little time together before you have to go home." I had been hoping to go to the meadow today to spend some time with her.

"I want to have a little one on one time with Alice. She is my best friend after all." Bella said. I had to remind myself that I had promised I would give her space today. But I was still disappointed.

"Why don't you and I do something tonight, just the two of us?" Bella said, shocking me.

What did she mean? A date? I was filled with excitement at the thought. Bella and I had never had a real date.

"Like a date?" I asked in confirmation.

"Yes, like a date." She answered and I could not help the joyful smile that crossed my face. She grinned back at me in return.

"We have never really been out on a real date before. It might be fun." She said.

I knew instantly where I wanted to take her and Alice gasped behind me as a vision formed in her head.

"Well if guys are going out on a date tonight we really have to get to the salon. Come on, Bella. Go get your shoes on so we can go." She dragged Bella from the room and pushed her upstairs.

You guys are going to have so much fun tonight! Alice thought. And us being out today will give you time to talk to Jasper. Rose and Emmett are going to be gone until eleven. I suggest that you be finished with your "talk" by then or Emmett will torment you for the next fifty six years about it.

"Thanks Alice." I replied. I waited for Bella to come downstairs with Alice.

She had barely made to the bottom step before I swept her into my arms and kissed her. Her fingers moved into my hair and gripped it in her tiny fingers.

Alice cleared her throat behind us and Bella slowly pulled away from me. I could not help the thrill that sparked through me when I saw her slightly dazed expression. I was delighted that I could cause that reaction in her. She saw the look in my eye and her expression turned mischievous. Suddenly she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed me, taking my bottom lip in her mouth and grazing it with her teeth. I was filled instantly with the same desire I'd felt last night. Before I could gather my thoughts she quickly turned towards the door.

"See you later!" She sang out sweetly.

I was still in a daze when I heard the sounds of Alice's and Bella's giggles in the garage.

Come on Edward, let's go hunt. I had forgotten that Jasper was in the room.

You need to burn off all that energy before you kill me with it. He thought lightheartedly.

"Alright, let's go." We made our way out of the house and easily leapt over the river. We ran through the woods exuberantly, rough housing with each other, dodging around trees and leaping over rocks. Jasper ran ahead of me. I caught up with him easily, pushing him to the side. He crashed into a tree, knocking it to the ground with a loud crash before leaping up and chasing after me. He caught up with me and leapt onto my back, dragging me down to the ground. We wrestled, pinning each other several times before calling it a draw. We sat on the forest floor laughing at each other before catching the scent of elk in the air.

By unspoken agreement we got up and ghosted toward the herd. The warm smell of their blood and the beat of their hearts thrump thrump'ed through the woods. I closed my eyes and let my other senses expand, allowing my instincts to take over. With out conscious thought my body moved towards the intoxicating aroma of their blood. Jasper moved with me, our footsteps silent through the undergrowth. We found the herd in a small clearing, some drinking from a small creek that trickled through the woods. Jasper moved stealthily to the other side of the clearing. I chose my target and leapt, my body uncoiling like a spring as I took my quarry to the ground. My teeth bit cleanly into the hot flesh of the elk's neck and I drained it, feeling the warm blood gush down my throat, soothing the burn as it went. I drained another before disposing of the carcasses. I left the clearing and sat down on a large boulder. Jasper joined me after a few moments and I could feel the contentment radiating off of him.

"So are you ready to talk about you and Bella yet?" He asked, breaking the silence.

I sighed. I was not comfortable with these types of discussions but I had to admit that Jasper had a lot more experience than I did and I needed to listen to him.

"I know that I need to so I don't hurt her accidentally. What happened to me last night was an eye opener. I cannot believe how strong that feeling was. It completely overtook me. How do I control that?" I asked. I felt helpless against the feelings that had inundated me.

"First of all, like I said you have too much control Edward. You have such a ruthless grip on your control that anything that challenges it strains it to the breaking point. You have got to let some of that go. Allow yourself to feel the emotions that you have inside. Relinquish some of the discipline that you have acquired over the decades. You have to test your boundaries."

"How? I have no idea how to do that." I said in frustration. I had been suppressing so much of myself over the years that the thought of letting any of it go terrified me.

"What if I can't stop myself?" I said helplessly.

"You have to go slow Edward. I'm not talking about going all the way all at once. I know that you cannot handle that. You have to think in baby steps." Jasper said.

"Baby steps?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

"Look I know this is embarrassing but how far have you gotten with Bella?" He asked.

I looked away. "Not far." I said. I could not meet his eyes. "Just kissing. I haven't trusted myself to go any farther." I knew if I was still human I would be blushing. Jasper picked up on my acute mortification.

"Don't be embarrassed Edward. The human body, and the vampire body for that matter, were made to feel pleasure. Sharing that with the woman you love can bring you closer together. Intimacy is one of the best ways to bond. Think about how devoted you feel to her now and you have only kissed. That feeling will only get stronger the more intimate you become."

I could not believe that there was anything that would make me more devoted to Bella. Jasper felt my doubts and laughed.

"I know it seems impossible but you will see what I mean. To do this you have to cross each hurdle one at a time. To start with you have to push the touch restrictions you have set up. You have already proven that you can touch her and not hurt her. So far you have limited your touching to the neck up. Now is the time to go lower."

I looked at him dubiously. "Lower? How much lower?" I was not sure I was ready for this.

Jasper laughed again. "Not that low yet, Edward. Baby steps remember? I am talking about waist up contact. The important thing is to go slow. Touch her and when you feel like you might be out of control of your lust or your thirst then stop until you regain it. Then you continue. You are going to have to talk to Bella about this too. So she knows not to push you too far too fast."

I scoffed at that. "And just how do I bring that up Jasper? 'By the way do you mind if I feel you up? Oh and stay still so I don't kill you?' I can imagine how that conversation would go." I said sarcastically.

Jasper burst out laughing, the sound echoing around the forest.

"God Edward you are so uptight! Chill out man! This is supposed to be about pleasure. If you let your turn-of-the-century hang-ups get in the way you will never be with Bella. She will appreciate the effort. You know she would never do anything to hurt you deliberately. But if you don't talk to her she might push your control too far without even knowing it."

I knew he was right but the thought of giving in to the desire in me scared me. Jasper felt it.

"Don't be afraid, Edward. You can do this. You have to trust yourself. I have never met anyone with more restraint than you. And Bella needs this as much as you do. Every time you pull away from her it knocks down her self esteem. Did you know that?"

I was shocked into speechlessness.

Jasper clapped his hand on my shoulder. "I can see you didn't. But imagine how she feels for a moment. You are kissing her and she is getting worked up, then you exercise that superhuman control and pull away. She is left feeling like she is not desirable enough for you to go farther. Even if she understands rationally why you won't progress, emotionally she feels inadequate."

"Inadequate?! My God Jasper! Are you serious?" It had never occurred to me that Bella felt that way. She was everything to me.

"Yes Edward. She wants to go farther and you push her away, though it is for her own good. You have said yourself that Bella doesn't see herself clearly. She feels like she is not enough for you. That you could never want her as much as she wants you."

"What? How can she not see that she is the most beautiful, most exquisite woman in existence?" I had never met a more beautiful woman than my Bella.

Jasper laughed. "God knows you have told her that often enough but she still doesn't see it. And pulling away from her only reinforces that."

"What do I do? How can I fix this?" I could not have her thinking that I did not desire her. I wanted her with every particle of my being.

"Break down your boundaries." Jasper said. "Touch her the way she wants to be touched; the way you want to touch her. We all need physical reinforcement of our love sometimes. Give in to it. Just go slowly. Only go as far as you can handle. This is going to be a slow process but a gratifying one."

"Thanks Jasper." I was infinitely grateful to have Jasper as my brother.

We got up and started our way back to the house. I had one more favor to ask of him.

"By the way, please don't mention this conversation to Emmett. You know how he is. I don't think that I am ready for the epic amount of teasing that he is sure to subject me to. I will talk to him eventually but right now I can't handle it."

Jasper laughed. "No prob, bro. But you know that you will have to talk to him at some point. Believe it or not I think that there are things that he can help you with. But for now this is between us. Emmett is not known for subtlety and I don't want him to scare you off before you even get started." He sniggered.

We made our way back to see that Rose and Emmett had returned but that Bella and Alice had not.

"Eddie! Just in time to have me kick your ass on the Xbox!" Emmett boomed out.

I rolled my eyes. He knew I hated being called Eddie.

"Not right now Emmy, I have some things to do."

Jasper burst out laughing.

"Pansy. Come on Jasper, you and me then."

I left to prepare for mine and Bella's date. I had my suit pressed, washed my car and made restaurant reservations. When I returned home I saw that Alice and Bella had returned. I walked into the house to see everyone engrossed in a movie and Bella curled up on the couch, asleep. Someone had placed an afghan over her, probably Esme. I very carefully picked her up and placed her on my lap. Even the short time I had been away from her today had almost been too much and I needed to touch her. She stirred slightly before settling in against my chest.

I sat holding her in my arms as the rest of the family watched the movie, marveling in the innocent sweetness of her expression. Her dark lashes fanned out across her alabaster cheeks and her lovely full lips were parted softly with sleep.

I heard her breathing change and her eyelids fluttered open. She looked at me with sleep still in her eyes.

"Hi." She said in a soft voice.

"Hi." I replied in the same soft tone.

"Did you get your errands finished?" she asked.

I smiled, thinking about my preparations for our date tonight.

"Yes, thank you. And you? Did you have fun with Alice today?"
Her cheeks turned pink and I raised my eyebrows. What could have happened with Alice today to cause the blush in her cheeks? I wished again, as always, to be able to hear her thoughts, even if it was only for a moment.

"Yes, we had a good time. Lots of girl talk. And shopping, because I think that is just inevitable when you are with Alice." Girl talk. I could imagine that a conversation with Alice would cause the blush in Bella's cheeks. Alice could tease with the best of them.

"Hey!" Alice cried indignantly. "I do more than shop you know."

Every head in the room turned in her direction, different degrees of disbelief on everyone's faces.

"Well, I do." She groused and we all laughed.

Bella sat up on my lap and ran her fingers through her hair, brushing it off her face. Her sweet scent formed a cloud around me.

"I like your new haircut." She was beautiful as always. Anything she did to herself only enhanced her loveliness. I could not help but run my fingers through the flowing silk of her hair and press my face into the dark mass. I inhaled the unique aroma that was Bella.

"Thanks, I'm glad you like it." She said shyly.

I raised my head and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I love everything about you. From the top of your beautiful head to your now-painted toenails."

She smiled and wiggled her adorable toes. "Thanks, Alice picked out the color. It's called 'Vamp'."

I burst out laughing. Of course. Only Alice.

We all sat, talking quietly amongst ourselves for another hour before Alice interrupted me with her thoughts.

She is all mine now Edward. I have to get her ready for you.

Alice stood up and came to stand before us.

"All right Bella, time to get started." I stood up with Bella in my arms and lowered her to the floor. I put my hands on her hips to steady her. I could not resist a soft kiss before releasing her into Alice's clutches.

"Have fun, love." I grinned, knowing she hated the hair and makeup part of going out.

Alice dragged her upstairs and I challenged Emmett to a few rounds of Xbox before going upstairs to shower and get ready myself.

As I got dressed I replayed the conversation with Jasper in my head. I knew that he was right, that I had to challenge my control in order to make it stronger. It seemed almost like going backwards. I had worked so hard for so long to perfect it and now I had to let some of it go. But he was right about me exploding if I didn't. I thought back to the feelings that had been coursing through me last night and how close I had been to giving in completely. I had given in; only Alice's intervention had stopped me. Baby steps, I thought. Let a little control go at a time. I could do this. I hoped.

I went downstairs to wait for Alice and Bella.

You look so handsome, Edward. Esme thought. She grabbed her camera and took a quick snapshot of me.

Nice bro. Emmett thought. You are definitely getting some tonight dressed like that.

I rolled my eyes at him. This was why I did not want Jasper to reveal our conversation to Emmett. If he knew what we had talked about today he would never let me live it down. My virgin status was the source of a lot of hilarity for Emmett.

Baby steps tonight. Jasper thought. You can do it.

I heard a door open upstairs and then Alice's voice called down to us.

"Ok we are coming down now. Turn around and stay out of my head!" She had been reciting Korean sign language in her head since she took Bella upstairs so there was no way to get into her head if I wanted to but I turned around as ordered anyway. I had a brief flashback to Prom. Alice had made me wait to see Bella then too. I think she enjoyed torturing me with anticipation.

I could hear Bella's heart racing as she took the stairs very slowly. I hoped that it was racing in anticipation for our date. I knew that I was looking forward to it a great deal.

I was looking into Jasper and Emmett's faces when I heard Bella reach the last step. They were blocking their thoughts from me but I saw their eyes widen in appreciation. I was desperate to see my love but was still forbidden to turn around by Alice. Damn teasing pixie.

Jasper grinned at Bella and gave her a thumb's up and Emmett whistled.

"Ok you can look now Edward." Alice said.

I spun around so fast I'm sure my shoe left a gouge in the carpet. Then I could not move a muscle.

She was perfection. I had no words. There were no words. There was no phrase in any of the languages I knew to describe how exquisite she looked.

Her rich dark hair was piled up in a mass of curls on the top of her head with a few tendrils curling around her delicate ears. She had a soft sweep of bangs across her forehead. Her makeup was subtle and emphasized the decadent chocolate of her eyes. Her skin was radiant, glowing in the navy blue dress she wore. The dress was simple but fit her to perfection. The cut of the neckline accentuated the graceful curve of her neck and shoulders and I wanted to bury my face in the crook of her neck. The soft material clung to her shape beautifully and she was the picture of feminine beauty.

I looked up into her eyes and saw everything I would ever want reflected in her eyes.

"I have never seen a more beautiful woman in my entire life." I said softly. The words seemed inadequate to describe the vision in front of me.

She blushed, the soft color enhancing her loveliness even more. "Thank you. You always make me feel that way. You look amazing too." I grinned at her, thankful that for once she did not turn my compliment aside and pleased that I made her feel beautiful. I offered my arm to her and she took it, smiling.

She looked up at me then, so much love and adoration in her eyes I felt my chest clench with the intensity. There was a sharp flash as Esme took our picture and Bella looked over at her.

"You both look so wonderful. I hope you have so much fun tonight." Esme said. I am going to make sure that everyone is out of the house tonight when you both get home. Privacy is our gift to the both of you.

I smiled slightly, grateful for Esme's thoughtfulness. The last thing that I wanted after a date with my love was to come home to a bunch of over-curious vampires.

"Speaking of, where are we going tonight?" Bella asked. I knew she hated surprises but I was hoping that this would be something she would enjoy.

"Ah ah ah, that is a secret, my love." I smirked at her as I led her out of the house and down the stairs. She stopped short when she saw my Vanquish parked in front of the house. She raised her eyebrows at me and I could not help but smile at the expression on her face.

"A special occasion calls for a special car. It would be an insult to how beautiful you look tonight for you to be seen in anything other than a car like this."

It was. I loved my Volvo but she was much too precious to me to be seen in anything less than the best. I saw her lips twitch but she did not say anything. I helped her into the car and was sitting in the driver's seat before she could buckle the seatbelt. I loved not having to hold back all of my vampire abilities when I was around her.

I started the car, reveling in the warm purr of the engine before backing out and driving down the drive to the main road.

"Where are we going?" She asked again, curiosity evident in her tone.

I hesitated. I hoped that she would like my idea as much as I had. I looked over to gauge her reaction.

"Port Angeles. I wanted to try to recreate the best part of our first "not-quite-a-date" date if that is agreeable to you?" I did not want to remind her of the terrible incident that she had endured but this was something that I wanted to do very much.

"Oh! I'd like that very much. It would be almost like starting over again, only better." I felt the anxiety slide from my body. She understood. Of course she did, this was Bella. I wanted to start over too. Begin our relationship anew.

"That is what I thought too. Go back to where it started and do everything right this time." I smiled at her and felt myself drowning in the depths of her eyes. Her eyes glazed over and her breath stopped for a moment before she shook her self and inhaled deeply.

"Dazzler." She grumbled.

I could only laugh. She had captivated me just as much.

"The feeling is mutual I assure you, my love."