I, unfortunately, own nothing Naruto related... except the plot of this story and.... yeah just the plot ^. ^' comment please... and uhh well enjoy this chapter *
Sorry I didn't updated sooner, my mother decided to mess with the computer which resulted in the complete shut down of the first three chapters of this story and shunned me from my fanfic account. ~tear~ but its working now…
Oh…… AND VOTE ON MY DAMN POLE OR I SHALL DRAG Hidan OUT OF THAT HOLE IN THE NARA FORREST AND HAVE HIM SMITE YOU WITH HIS KICK ASSNESS!! And being as I love my readers…… I do not wish to do that. ^.^
Chapter Four
"Yo wussup?! We were just in the neighborhood heard that you were in here and decided to pay a visit!" Dei yelled from in the doorway, holding a mass of balloons.
"We as in...?" I trailed off as Sasori, Kisame, Itachi, Kakuzu, Tobi, Zetsu, Konan, and Pain came piling into the room all holding various gift things that you give to people in the hospital.
"Kakuzu called and told Deidara, who of course told everyone else." Sasori explained.
"Figures, but I just got done talking to him like 2 minutes ago…. There's no way in hell that he could have called you AND for you ALL to get here by now."
"We're just good like that." Kisame chuckled.
"So what's the Dr. say on your condition?" Konan asked turning to my dad.
"He hasn't come in yet… but I've stopped coughing up blood for now."
"I know Sasori, Dei and Kakuzu are suspended… but shouldn't the rest of you be on school?" I asked.
"Since when do you care? Aren't you the one, out of all of us that happens to quote on quote miss school the most?" Itachi questioned making air quotes.
"Tch I do not miss school that much."
"Tobi know that Hidan is lying! Because Hidan almost never comes to school and Tobi knows this because Tobi is a good boy and always goes to school!" The masked freshman exclaimed.
"You're not in school now." I pointed out
"B-But then that means th-that Tobi is a bad boy!!!" He wailed curling up on the floor. "Tobi cant be a bad boy!!! Tobi has to be a good boy!"
"Great Hidan, you've turned the kid into a blubbering mess." Kakuzu growled as Zetsu and Konan tried to console the boy.
"Sorry!"
"Umm as much as I appreciate you guys coming to visit me… I think it would be better if you left… and take Hidan with you. His random spaz outs are not helping me." My dad cut in before anyone else could yell at me for making Tobi cry.
"I'm not fucking spazzing!"
…………………………………………
"I can't believe we got kicked out of the hospital for antagonizing the patients! Honestly it was my fucking dad!" I grumbled as everyone made their way to Deidara's house.
"Hidan… you were screaming and cussing on the top of your lungs. Of course they were going to kick us out." Itachi muttered slightly annoyed.
"Well they didn't need to kick me out. I work there!" Kakuzu snapped smacking me upside the back of my head. "So thanks a lot Hidan for possibly making me lose the only thing I had to do this week."
"It's not my fucking fault! How was I supposed to know you're not supposed to yell at a hospital?" I demanded.
"Hmm here's an idea…. IT'S A FUCKING HOSPITAL!!!! WHERE PEOPLE GO WHEN THEY ARE SICK OR INJURED….. THEY'RE THERE TO GET BETTER AND REST AND IT'S NOT EASY TO DO THAT WHEN THERE'S SOME INCONSIDERATE ASS SCREAMING EVERY GOD DAMNED CURSE WORD ON THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS!!!!!" Kakuzu screamed grabbing my shoulders and shaking me like a rag doll.
"And everyone call me the spas."
"I'm going to kill you."
I winced slightly as Kakuzu moved one hand up around my neck and applied pressure. "You couldn't kill me."
"Oh but I could try."
Automatically my hand flew up to his wrist as he lifted me off the ground. "I like the pain. I'm a masochist remember?" I manage to choke out.
"Kakuzu put him down." Pain sighed putting his hand on Kakuzu's shoulder. "You know that you'll feel like shit if you actually hurt him."
Said miser looked at me then to Pain. "Fine." He finally grumbled dropping me.
"Fucking asshole." I muttered rubbing my neck.
"Whatever. What the hell are we going to do?"
"Well I got some stuff stored so… we're gonna hit my house then go to then usual place." Dei explained dragging Sasori to walk in between me and Kakuzu.
"Which usual spot, the one near the beach or the abandoned fairgrounds?" Kisame asked.
"Fairgrounds… there's always people at the beach." Konan pointed out… "I really don't want to be caught again because of Hidan's loud ass mouth."
"I'm not that fucking loud!!! You-"I stopped mid sentence and glanced around… everyone was staring at me eyebrows raised. "Ok so I'm loud… but I'm not always loud!"
"Hidan… you're loud when you're sleeping" Kakuzu snorted
"When you're eating" Dei chimed in
"You are always loud… Oh so very loud." Zetsu grumbled.
"Ok I fucking get it I'm fucking loud!" I snapped crossing my arms. "But hell what can I say I like making an entrance."
"Yeah right into a cell where we all get to call our parents to come pick us up." Pain sighed. "Half the time I want to bet you… but I don't because I have self control… unlike you."
"Of course the one time you actually fucking talk it's to insult me."
"Hidan you shouldn't use big words… you might choke." Kakuzu chuckled
"Fuck off!!"
"What was my brother saying about you being a parrot?"
"Fuck you"
"Paully want a cracker?"
"I'll fucking kill you!!!"
"You can't kill me. Then who would keep you out of trouble?"
"Will you two stop flirting please? It's making us sick." Zetsu growled.
"I'M NOT FUCKING FLIRTING WITH THAT HEATHEN BASTARD!!! AND I'M NOT FUCKING GAY EITHER!!! WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYONE MAKING GAY JOKES?!?! IS IT NATIONAL EVERYONE TRASH FUCKING HIDAN DAY?! DID I JUST MISS THE JASHIN DAMNED MEMO?!?!?" I yelled throwing my hands up.
"Hidan calm down. Zetsu was just joking…" Konan soothed smoothing my hair down like I was a fucking kid "Weren't you Zetsu?"
"Sure. I was dead serious."
"Stop fucking petting me like I'm a fucking cat!" I snapped shoving Konan away from me.
"Then stop yelling like a god damned psycho!"
"We're here." Sasori interrupted us before I could say anything.
"Damn Dei you got anymore of that shit?" I asked downing the bottle of vodka.
"No… and btw you drank half of that by yourself. I'm surprised you're not totally smash-"Dei trailed off as I fell onto the ground. "Maybe you are."
"I'm not fucking smashed. I am purrrfectly fucking soberrrrrrrr. Isn't that right Kuzuuuuu?" I slurred crawling over to said person.
"Hidan you are completely smashed." He sighed as I curled up in his lap.
"But soooo are youuuuuuuu."
"I'm tipsy… not smashed."
"Get a room you two. Or break out a camera so we can make some cash." Zetsu grumbled.
"Zetsu can we please not antagonize a drunken Hidan? I'd rather not die." Dei asked
"Maybe we will go get a fucking room!" I paused and glanced around the grounds. "Or a tent. Whatduya say Kuzu?" I purred
~KuZu's Pov: ~
I blinked in surprise as Hidan pressed his forehead to my cheek. "No. Hidan you aren't thinking rationally and I think it would be best if you got off of my lap" I muttered leaning away.
"Aww come on 'Kuzu you know you like it." Kisame teased nudging my arm
"Screw off fish boy." I growled.
"Kuzuu why are you sooooo mean to me? I just wanna give you a kiss!"
"Hidan get off of-"
I was cut off as Hidan pressed his lips against mine, leaning against me until we fell back onto the ground.
"Whoo-hoo! Drinks and a show!" Konan whooped falling onto Pain.
I managed to push him off of me and scramble away. "It's not a show!"
"Oh just go for it. He won't remember anything tomorrow any way." Sasori sighed lying in the grass.
"Tch I'm not gay! And I don't like the idea of taking advantage of anyone." I snapped glaring at the red head.
"Whatever you say man… whatever you say." Kisame chuckled. "But this might be your only chance."
"Shove it."
~Hidan's Pov: ~
"Fuck! Why the fucking hell does it feel like I was run the fuck over by a Jashin damned truck?!" I grumbled holding my head.
"Because you got your ass completely smashed last night and I suggest you shut up before my mom comes up here and finds out you're here."
I blinked a few times to clear my eyes and looked around… I was in Kakuzu's room. "When the fuck did I get here?!"
"I dragged you drunk ass here… with help from my brother." Kakuzu grumbled pulling his blankets over his head.
"Your brother didn't grope me did he? What did I do last night 'cause I can't remember a damn thing?"
"Umm my brother didn't molest you as far as I know and you didn't do anything uhh too bad yesterday."
"So what did I do then?"
"You kissed me… and tried to seduce me… but luckily for you I'm a whole lot smarter than you are."
"I WHAT!!!!! I TRIED TO FUCKING SEDUCE YOU?!?!? AND I FUCKING KISSED YOU?!?!?"
"Hidan please shut up or we're both going to be in deep shit." Kakuzu sighed. "Besides I stopped it before it got out of hand."
"BUT THAT'S NOT THE- But that's not the fucking point. I fucking kissed you! I'm not fucking gay?! And I tried for more! That's not me!! I don't kiss other guys!!!"
"You kissed my brother a couple days ago." Kakuzu pointed out.
"Your brother tricked me into it!"
"But you were in your right state of mind then… you weren't yesterday… so if my brother tricking you into kissing him was an acceptable excuse then why isn't being smashed?"
"B-because… it's you… It's different, you're my best friend and I don't want to fuck it up over something stupid like kissing you." I mumbled.
"Hidan you were drunk… you weren't yourself and I completely understand that. It wasn't as if you were screwing me… or if you were kissing me while sober. It wasn't your fault" He stated not removing his head from "Though Konan sure liked the show."
"So you're not fucking mad?"
"If I was mad would I have brought you back to my house so you didn't have to go home drunk?"
"Thanks… I guess." I paused "So if your psycho ass mom's home… how the fuck am I supposed to leave? And what about my parents?! They're gonna fucking kill me!!!"
"Your parents are still at the hospital… your dad's condition is iffy and I told them you were here."
I jumped when there was a knock on the door. "Kakuzu it's me." Kazuo's voice called from behind the door. "I brought up some breakfast for you… and an extra serving for your hung over lover."
Grumbling to himself Kakuzu tore the blankets off of himself and stomped over to the door wrenching it open. "Thanks… And for the god damned record he's not my damn lover!"
"Could have fooled me the way he was all over you yesterday. With his hands down your pants and-"
"With my hands down his pants?!?!" I screeched before turning on Kakuzu. "You said all I did was kiss you!!"
"I also said you tried to seduce me… I jus left out the how part."
"What exactly did I fucking do?!? I think I have a right to know!"
"Trust me kid you don't want to know." Kazuo chuckled
"Kazuo will you please shut up… it wasn't that bad."
"What the fuck did I do?!?!" I demanded glaring at the two of them.
"Promise me you wont freak out when I tell you."
"If you don't fucking tell me right now I'm gonna fucking flip shit!"
"Dude trust me you don't want to know. I wish I didn't know."
"Just tell me!"
"I really don't think I should. I know what you can handle and I'm not sure if this is one of those things." Kakuzu muttered shaking his head.
"Tell me-"
"Kakuzu! What the hell is all that yelling?!"
I froze as his mom appeared in the doorway. "Nothing mom we were just goofing off." Kazuo muttered stepping in front of her, blocking me from view.
Kakuzu taking his chance shoved me under the bed "Don't say a damn thing or we're both dead."
"I wasn't born yesterday. Why the hell was there yelling?! Is there some one up here?! I swear to go if there is-"
"Mom we're not doing anything. We were just err rough housing." He tried to reassure her.
"Kakuzu… I know you don't think I'm stupid. You don't 'rough house' or 'goof around'. And it sounded to me like there was a third person in here." She scoffed.
"Mom do you honestly think I'd be stupid enough to sneak someone in here while you're home? Let alone try and convince you there's no one here when I know very well that you would search every crack in my room to make sure I'm not lying?"
"Well no… but you can never be too sure."
"If you feel that you need to check then go ahead… I just hoped that you would trust me to the extent that you don't have to check my room."
"Alright I'm sorry. Just make sure you keep it down." She finally sighed. "it's just that I could have sworn that I heard Hidan's loud mouth in here."
"Maybe you should go back to bed mom. You have to be feeling really stressed if you're hearing him." Kazuo laughed. "It's your day off… you should relax and not worry about that obnoxious brat."
"I guess… and if you want to go out today Kakuzu you can. Hell I don't even care if you hang out with Hidan today… as long as he's not here I don't care."
"Thanks mom. I hope you enjoy your day off." Kakuzu muttered gently pushing her out of the room and closing the door behind her.
Slowly I crawled out from under the bed. "Well that was-"
"Shh!"
We waited for a minute before the two of them rounded on me. "Could you be any louder?!"
"She would have killed all three of us!"
"Honestly Hidan!"
"Fuck I'm sorry… if you guys had just told me what I had done last night I wouldn't have been yelling." I grumbled crossing my arms.
"If we had told you then you would have been yelling ten times as loud."
"Was it really that bad? I couldn't possibly do anything that fucking bad could I? I'm not that bad when I'm drunk am I?" I questioned trying to keep my voice down.
"Drunk? No. Completely smashed? Hell yes." Kazuo smirked. "Let's just say you almost woke everyone up last night."
"WHAT?! But he said I didn't do anything that bad!!"
"Hidan you're not going to like this at all so I think we should go somewhere else so you don't have my mom up here again." Kakuzu sighed
"You brought me out to the middle of the fucking woods?" I questioned raising an eyebrow
"You cant wake anyone up here when you start screaming." Kazuo laughed sitting at the base of a tree.
"Can you guys please tell me what the fuck happened already before I kill you both!!"
"Hidan last night, you drank half that bottle of vodka… by yourself." Kakuzu started. "You kissed me and then proceeded to grope me until we left."
"When I opened the door for the two of you, you had your hand down his pants and were rubbing up against him like a dog in heat." Kazuo added.
"It took both of us to get you upstairs; Kazu left us after you err grabbed him a couple times. After that we uhh.."
"We what?! WHAT DID WE DO!!!!" I demanded shaking Kakuzu like a damned rag doll.
"WE HAD SEX!! THAT'S WHAT WE DID OK?!?! WE HAD HOT PASSIONATE DRUNKEN SEX!!!!" Kakuzu snapped yanking away.
I let my arms drop to my sides as I gaped at my best friend. "W-we fucking fucked?! But you said. You fucking said!!!! Yous fucking said I didn't do anything!!"
"I wasn't going to tell you but Kazuo decided to open his mouth and make you flip out." Kakuzu muttered sinking back against a tree. "It would have been better if you didn't know."
"You weren't going to fucking tell me?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"Do you think it's easy on him? Do you think he wanted to have wild, drunken, passionate monkey sex with you?" Kazuo demanded.
"Alright I think that's enough Kazu." Kakuzu laughed.
"What the fucks so funny?!?"
"We were just messing with you Hidan. You didn't do anything." Kazuo told me joining in with Kakuzu. "Well you did kiss him a couple times… and I'm pretty sure you did try to grope him but as for the sex…. I think your safe."
"That so wasn't fucking funny you ass holes!" I screamed covering my face with my hands.
"Do you honestly think that I would let you sleep with me?"
*well that took a whole lot longer than I had hoped. This chapter was shell to write and I apologize for the long wait…. I had to reach a certain word count before I even thought about posting. But its up so yay! Please, PLEASE review and vote in my poll.*