Chapter 5: Sometimes I Need Some Help
The rest of the day went hassle free, except for the short argument she had with Hotch over him doing the majority of her files, but other than that, everything was seemingly easier today, thank God, because her exhaustion from the lack of sleep from last night was starting to sink in and as it neared lunch time, she felt the effects go crazy with her. Taking an early lunch, Morgan asked if there was anything Emily needed and of course, she said no. It was only three minutes later, once Reid had gone to get a coffee and Garcia was happy in her office, that JJ walked towards Emily's desk. She dropped a subtle note on her desk and carried on breezing past, making Emily smile with amusement at her effort. It was not like she needed to do that anyway, but she picked the note up and read it: Em, will you come up to my office please, it's important. JJ. Xx She found the note ever so amusing from the way she had put both names on the note, as if Emily had not already picked up on who it was too and who it was from. But her amusement passed as she stood up from her desk and walked towards JJ's office, worried that something might be wrong with the younger blonde. But much to her dismay, it was quite the opposite.
"Hey, I guess you got my note." Was how JJ greeted her.
"Well, it was hard to miss considering how 'discreetly' you dropped it on my desk." Both smirked slightly and Emily closed the door, going over to sit on the chair by JJ's desk. "So, what's wrong?" She asked, thankful to have someone else's problem in her lap for just a short moment or two. At least it would make her forget what Hotch said this morning.
"Actually…" Emily did not like the sound of the way this was going, "I was going to ask you that." Nope, she did not like this one bit. Her eyes locked back down at her desk in the bull-pen, wishing to be there, hoping, if she stared long enough, to just magically be back at her desk, asleep, hoping this to be a nightmare. But, the blinds shut, cutting off her vision and her eyes locked with a now standing JJ. Apparently, Emily was so engrossed in trying to mentally escape, that she had missed the blonde moving all the way around the room to shut the blinds. She crouched down, to the floor in front of Emily's chair, obstructing the clear view she had, where she was previously looking down at the floor. "Come on, Em. You get sick at work, you pass out, you are sleeping nearly every day and you keep staying late. I don't blame the guys for thinking something is going on with you. All of that combined with no field work is kind of suspicious. Just talk to me…" JJ's puppy dog eyes finally met with Emily's and she knew there was no way out.
"You really want to know what is going on with me?" She asked, taking a deep breath as JJ only nodded, as to not interrupt her words. Emily knew it was bad to lie to the female. Even if she was not a profiler, her job still required some skills and Emily hated to think what she had profiled about her in the past. That combined with the experience of her already having a child, she knew JJ would figure it out. Better sooner than later, she thought. "I'm pregnant." She said, in a flurry, her eyes not meeting JJ's for a moment or two while the blonde stayed unresponsive. Then she heard movement in the room, but no words were passed. Suddenly, she jumped but settled as she felt JJ's arms wrap around hers and hold her in a tight hug.
"Emily, that's amazing! You're going to be a mom!" She smiled happily before letting her go and sitting back in her seat. "How far along are you?" Emily had to admit right now that telling the blonde mother was far better than when Hotch found out, because, not only did her have that motherly touch, but she also had experience behind her and she was finally able to talk to someone who knew what she was going on about.
"Almost four months." She told her and JJ seemed shocked.
"That far along and you aren't even showing?" Emily blushed slightly and looked down.
"Only a little bump, not really to visible. It's easily hid under a loose top and just a size bigger pants." She confessed, and she saw JJ's eyes light up. "No, no touching, please, no touching." It was too late, the second she began protesting, JJ flew from her chair and her hands were on Emily's stomach, well, bump, a wide smile on her face.
"Awh! Hello baby Prentiss. I'm your Auntie JJ!" She began talking and Emily took all of her might to push her away.
"Stop talking to it, weirdo." She teased and JJ pulled a tongue at her.
"You can't call the baby an it! She or he will hear you!" She teased and Emily pulled a tongue back at her. "So, any clues as to who the father is? I'm guessing Hotch is out of the question." She said and Emily looked shocked.
"No, Hotch is not the father, but he has stuck by me ever since I told him, I think it was because he was the only one that knew, but he can stop all of that now I'm probably going to have you checking on me every hour or so." She joked.
"Oh, every half hour." JJ joked back and smiled, noticing her avoidance in telling her who the real father was, she moved on. "So, any ideas on names?" A shake of the head made her look shocked. "Started the nursery?" She asked another question and seeing Emily shake her head each time made her feel a little more like helping her. "Fine, it's settled then, this weekend we will go shopping for some baby things." She decided.
"Come on, JJ, we don't need to get any of that yet. It's not even a visible bump yet."
"It's not an option, Emily. From what I am guessing, someone needs to spoil this baby, and that job is me, besides, you and Pen spoiled Henry before he was even born!" She smiled at her, and Emily was still looking away from her eyes. "Now, don't you think we better get telling the team?" Her question made Emily meet her eyes.
"No! Please, JJ, you can't tell anyone that I'm pregnant. I did not want anyone else to know!" But despite her wishes, Rossi stood at the other side of the door and overheard them talking.
"Prentiss?" He opened the door and looked at her, "You're pregnant?" He asked, a smile slowly growing on her face. Emily knew there was no way out, but she figured she would give it a shot.
"No?" It sounded like a question even to her.
"Congratulations!" He hugged her and smiled widely.
"Yeah, thanks." She looked down at the floor again, not seeming too happy about it, Rossi understood why, but JJ did not. "Please, Dave, you can't tell anyone." She gave him pleading eyes and Rossi nodded, understanding.
"Of course I would not." He gave her a small smile.
"Good, now can I please get the hell back to work?" She asked, with pleading eyes at JJ this time.
"Nope." Was her answer. "I saw you asleep on Hotch's couch this morning, and you were still working when I left at one! You really need to go home and sleep." Emily was growing tired of people telling her what to do, first Hotch, now JJ.
"I'm fine, JJ, not sleepy at all!" She lied, her eyes giving away the lie as the bags hung under it. Now Rossi stepped in and told her what to do.
"No! Go and get your things, I'm going to drive you home." Emily groaned, at least if it was JJ saying it, she could have gotten away with just telling her she was fine, it's not like JJ had any hold over her. But Rossi on the other hand, can and will force her to go home. Begrudgingly, she stood up and went to pack everything on her desk away while JJ and Rossi chatted.
"Apparently Hotch knows." JJ told Rossi.
"Yeah." He seemed more distant.
"She does not seem to pleased about it." JJ sighed.
"Yeah, maybe…" JJ clicked on that something was being kept secret between the two of them.
"What do you know?" She asked, and Rossi shook his head.
"It doesn't matter. If Em doesn't find it important to tell you, it is not my place to say." JJ groaned, it's going to be hard to get information from him.
"Fine, you better go tell Hotch you're taking her home." He nodded and said 'thanks' before going over to Hotch's office. He knocked hard which told Hotch it was one of the men on the team.
"Come in." He said, and attempted to tear his eyes away from his work.
"Hey, Hotch, I'm going to drive Em home." He told Hotch and Hotch looked shocked.
"What?" He was not really sure of what had gone on.
"We know she's pregnant, Hotch, she just told me and JJ. Well, she told JJ, I over heard." Hotch nodded.
"Make sure she gets in alright, you know, make sure the house is secured." Rossi laughed.
"Alright, Hotch. I'll be back soon." He left the room and saw Emily waiting at the bottom with her briefcase of things. Immediately, Rossi reached for the case. "You should not be carrying that." He took it from her.
"I'm going to regret ever telling you." she grumbled and looked around to see if anyone was watching them.
"Ah, but you didn't tell me, I just have excellent snooping skills." He smirked.
"Yeah, big head, but you didn't find out for a month or two." She smirked back.
"So what, I'm not a pregnancy detector, but I am still an excellent snoop." He pulled a tongue at her.
"Prove it." She teased him.
"Here." For a moment he stayed still before pulling some case files out of her briefcase. "They stay at work, you go home to sleep. The two don't mix." He dumped he files she had discreetly packed back on her desk and began to walk away. "Coming Madame?" He winked and Emily had to smile back.
The drive went in silence, and Emily was grateful for it but less than five minutes away from her home, Rossi began to speak as they sat at a red light.
"How are you dealing with it?" He asked, kindly. As much as Emily had been happy to be able to speak to JJ earlier because she had experience, she was somehow pleased that she could talk to Rossi. He was the only living man who knew about the abortion and she was going to keep it that way. But, at least she can open up to him.
"With what?" She tried to play the dumb card.
"Don't play stupid. The baby, abortion, becoming a mother. Everything really." The light went green and he started to drive as she answered.
"I was scared at first, terrified. Unsure if this was just a punishment for the abortion. Maybe someone was trying to show me what I could have had and then they would take it away again." She looked at her shaky hands.
"So you kept it to yourself?" He asked.
"Yeah, I didn't want anyone knowing if I did lose the baby." She still would not meet his few glances.
"What made you tell Hotch then?" He seemed curious.
"It was Edd Harding's case." She told him.
"The case where you were sent undercover?" He asked, already knowing the answer. "Oh, Em, I'm so sorry!" He apologised, "We never would have sent you if we knew."
"I know, calm down, we both were fine, but it was too close for comfort for me, I had to tell Hotch." Dave gave a nod of understanding.
"No one will take that baby from you, remember that." He assured her as they drove into her driveway. "Give it the love and care I know you will give it, and I'm sure you will be fine. And if you need help, we're all here. Even the others, although they don't know it yet." He laughed slightly and stopped the car.
"Thanks, Dave." She gave him a genuine smile before leaving the car, and Dave followed her. "You don't have to make sure I come in and go to sleep, I promise." She smiled again.
"I know, but Hotch would freak if he found out I let you go in alone, and did not 'secure the parameter'." They both laughed and Emily unlocked the door to the hallway. Walking up the stairs, she seemed to be getting slower and slower as exhaustion set in, and Dave had already taken her bag a few sets of stairs ago. "Told you we should have gotten the lift." He quirked.
"I'm not an invalid." She told him.
"I know, but you're exhausted, and we still have another two flights of stairs." He groaned, and stayed one step behind her, ready to catch her if she fell. But, she never did and relief took over both of them as they reached the top of the stairs.
"I thought that it was never going to end." Emily joked as she fumbled around with her key for a moment.
"You and me, both." Rossi laughed back.
The weekend rolled by with ease and no one seemed to care about Emily's lunchtime disappearances into one of the three offices. But, it was harder to hide from the three agents as everywhere she went, she felt their eyes on her. True to her word, JJ showed up at her door at ten on that Saturday morning, a smile on her face. Emily looked far from happy, she really did not want to do the whole shopping trip thing.
"Why is it necessary for us to do this, JJ?" She asked, finally seated in the car.
"It's necessary because your baby will be coming into the world in almost five months and you have nothing set up and nothing brought." Emily huffed as they came to a stop outside Mother Care. "Here we are." JJ smiled at her, and both left the car, Emily not sure if she would ever return.
Looking through some of the things, she had to admit that a few things were absolutely adorable. But, she did not give any input, she just let JJ have her say and followed her around as she took a note of everything they needed. God, this list was going to be expensive. She found herself over by a bookshelf, where there were a few chairs and, happy for the seat, she took a book and sat down. She did not pay attention to any of the words she was reading, it all sounded like gibberish to her, and her eyes soon found JJ's as the blonde walked over to her.
"So, we can't leave without buying something for the baby, anything you found interesting yet?" She asked, and Emily sighed, she knew she had to buy something, and JJ did no specify what.
"Actually, I found a really cute teddy back there, I think it will be perfect for now. Just for the time being." JJ nodded.
"Alright then, go and pick it up." She watched Emily walk away, and found herself sneakily buying the cutest unisex baby vest set for the baby in the time it too Emily to return. "Found it?" She asked, smiling widely at the medium sized giraffe teddy bear, that Emily seemed to be sub consciously stroking with her thumb.
"Mmm hmm." She looked back down, the teddy reminding her of one she had when she was a child. She hoped her baby would love it.
"Alright then, come on." The winding string of wire separating the cue from the till seemed to take forever for her to wind around, but eventually, they were both leaving the shop, each with a bag. "So, did you find something nice for Henry?" Emily asked with a smile, her hand still in the bag somewhere, stroking the soft toy.
"Actually…" JJ's words drifted off and Emily realised what she had done.
"Oh, no, JJ." She sighed. "What did you get?" She finally asked, climbing in the car, JJ handed her the bag and Emily pulled the back of vests out. Each were cream/white with a beige lining on the neck with a selection of jungle animals on one: Elephant, giraffe and lion. On the other four vest sat each animal individually and then a plain vest without an image. Much to what she wanted to say, Emily loved them.
"Thank you, JJ. They're adorable." She gave her a smile and handed them back to her along with her own bag and JJ put them on the back seat.
"I know. I can't wait to see my little niece/nephew in them! They're going to look so cute." She sounded excited, more excited than Emily had ever been over this pregnancy.
"You sound like you're more into this pregnancy than me!" She joked, well, half joked.
"I know, what's stopping you from being happy about it? Maybe I can help?" She looked at her and Emily shook her head.
"Nothing, besides, I think I am slowly beginning to get into it myself. But, obviously, I'm anxious." She confessed.
"It's to be expected. Now, shall we go for lunch?" She asked and Emily nodded.
"I'm starved!" The both laughed and JJ began driving away.
Halfway though their lunchtime, and JJ got a phone call, which she decided to take outside. Emily, of course, knew this meant that they had a case and for some strange reason she seemed to be secretly happy over having something to take her away from the next six shops JJ had planned. Standing up, she tidied their table away, and gave a thanks to the person that helped her, before taking hers and JJ's things outside. In the black SUV, she found JJ still on the phone, looking exasperated.
"Alright, we will be in in a moment." Emily could hear her say, and she walked over at a pace when she saw her about to leave the car.
"I'm here. Case?" She asked, already knowing the answer and she climbed into the passenger side of the car. "Do you want me to call everyone else in?" Emily asked, and JJ nodded with a slight 'thanks'.
Boarding the jet, Emily immediately went to her normal seat. She felt a set of eyes on her, and she looked up. The majority of people on the plane were looking through the case file, all except Rossi, who, when she caught his look, gave her a small smile which she returned. As the plane began taking off, Emily held strongly to the sides of her seat, so tightly her knuckles were white. But not out of fear, she was quite good when it came to flying, but because her stomach tightened in a sickening way and not only was she not over her morning sickness fully, she had also spent that morning coughing from time to time and she knew she was getting sick. Knowingly, her lips pressed into a thin line, stopping all fluids from leaving her mouth. As the take off began to level out a little more, she opened her eyes to find the same man as before watching her in concern. He mouthed to her:
"Are you alright?" And both of his eyebrows creased into a concerned look, until she gave him an honest nod and his attention lingered on her for a moment, making sure she was telling the truth, figuring she was, he turned back to the case file, which Emily did the same once her stomach settled.
Unfortunately, the case had taken a bad turn and it seemed that the only way to catch the unsub was to use bait. Someone to find any form of clue that would be evidence to use against him. Another downside was that, only one person fitted the profile. Emily stood at the back of the small room in the police station, her back to the wall, arms crossed over her chest in a defensive way. Her head always down towards the floor. She looked completely venerable. Next to her stood JJ, who was slightly more forward than her, and she looked extremely protective of her, and right in front of her was David Rossi, hiding her away from the other members, trying his best to worm her way out.
"Hotch, you and I both know she is the only one that can do this!" Morgan went back round in a circle to the same argument that had been going on for the past twenty minutes.
"No, Morgan, she is not going undercover! We will find an alternative!" He met Morgan's harsh tone.
"There is no alternative, we've spoken to Reid and you know there isn't one, Hotch. I wouldn't suggest this if it weren't the last thing we could do!" Morgan shouted, once again. Now Rossi piped in, which Emily hoped he would not do as all eyes were now facing her way.
"Morgan, there will be another way, we can't just send her down there, blind. Anything could happen!" He now shouted.
"Rossi, we do not have time to find another way, someone might… no WILL die if we leave it any longer!" He shouted back. Then everything went silent, or at least Emily thought it did, as she became lost in her own thoughts. Someone would die, and more people possibly after that. She had a massive decision now. Save one… two… possibly three women, or her own child?
"I'll do it." She finally spoke up, and realised that they had indeed been shouting all of that time. But, even through all of the shouts, they all heard her, and everything went silent. She felt five sets of eyes boar into her skin like silver daggers.
"Don't be stupid." Came JJ's response. The first response.
"She's right, you can't go in there." Rossi now said.
"We will find another way, Prentiss." Hotch now spoke up, but her mind was already made and before anyone could do anything, she left the room to go and 'save the day'. All of them followed after her and finally caught up with her in the main police station.
"Prentiss… Stop." Hotch said, and she stopped and turned hot on her heels to face him. Both groups were split. Reid and Morgan were standing behind Emily as if on her team and the rest on Hotch's side. All of their minds ticked, thinking of something to say. And Rossi knew just what that one thing was, and Emily hated him for it.
"Emily, you cannot go running into an unsub. Not even to save some people's lives, you have got to start thinking about yourself, and about the baby you are carrying." She felt the room go silent and all eyes fall on her. God this was embarrassing.