When Jack awoke he could not feel Kate wrapped up in arms it made him cold on the inside and out. Jack sat up and noticed that Kate was at the edge on the bed fully clothed and had her back towards him.
" Kate, What is going on? Why don't you come back to bed with me?"
Jack said all this as he moved to her and wrapped his strong arms around her waste bringing her close to him. He nuzzled his head in her neck placing light kisses all along her neck and shoulder. This seemed to ease her as she relaxed into him and as soon as his hand began to travel her body, Kate quickly snapped out of it and became tense again.
" Please Jack. Don't make this harder than it already is." Kate let out in a pained voice.
"I don't understand where this is coming from. Last night was amazing, we bared our souls to each other. Don't you dare sit there and pretend that it meant nothing to you, because Kate I saw the look in your eyes I know that I am the man you want and need!"
" That is just it Jack when I woke up this morning I was not thinking about you or myself. What I have to think of is that precious little girl that belongs to me."
" That belongs to us Kate she is my daughter too."
"I know that is why I hope that you will understand what I have to do as a mother. Jack you have to let Gracie and I go live with Tom." Kate stated in a sad tone that Jack knew the very words were tearing her heart apart just as the words were doing to his own heart. Jack felt as if he had been punched in the gut and all the air had just been sucked out of him. He had to physically remove himself from her and he grasped for his chest if he had been shot. Then as he looked into her eyes and Kate saw that his eyes had become hard as stone.
"I will do no such thing."Jack said in a calm eerie manner that gave Kate chills down her spine.
Kate somehow found the courage to continue with what she knew was best for Gracie even though in her own heart all she wanted to do was let Jack hold her and make love to her ." Jack just hear me out. You owe me that much."
Jack looked away from her glare and just nodded his head for her to continue.
Kate swallowed hard almost too mentally prepare herself to make it through what she had to say.
" You say that you want Gracie and I to stay, but what will you do with us Jack? Have us stay on as servants and see us in secret? If it was just me I could live with it, but this is no life for Gracie, she deserves so much better."
" I don't want you and Gracie to be servants either. You don't know the pain and guilt I feel when I see you working in that way and the fact that my little girl has no rights to what is hers." Jack paused for a moment then an idea came to him. " Kate what if I built a house out by the lake that you could live in with Gracie? It could be our own little world that no one else could taint. Your days would be filled with taking care of Gracie instead of doing labor and then after work I could come and eat dinner and play with Gracie then once we put her to bed I could make love to you all night long." Jack then moved himself behind her again and moved her into his lap and to prove a point of just how wonderful those nights could be Jack began to nipple on her ear.
As much as she wanted to Kate did not put up a fight as he held her in his lap and lightly continued his kisses.
" Jack that sounds heavenly, but what will we do once Gracie grows older and wants a life of her own? She will have grown up with no other interaction with kids her own age."
At this Jack stilled his kisses yet he did not say anything, but he continued to tightly hold on to her in his lap almost if he was expecting for someone to come in at any minute and take her from him.
When Kate figured out that Jack was not going to speak she spoke instead, " Listen Jack I would never ask or expect you to throw out your other wives or your sons and lets face it we both understand that the world you live in would never allow for you to be with someone like me, but it is not fair to keep Gracie and I hidden in a life shame."
" Kate I don't care that you have betrayed my company, but my father would forbid any kind of contact because of this . That is why you and Gracie could never be apart of my public family. If he knew what just happened between us , Oh God Kate I don't know what he would do! You have no clue what that man is capable of."
"Jack it does not really matter if I committed the crime or not. Your father and Juliet would have found anything to get rid of me! It always looked bad having me as a wife, I tainted the Shepherd name and don't you dare try to deny it Jack you know what I speak is the truth. This is why you have to let us go. Tom is a good man Jack and he will take such good care of both of us."
Jack began to sob, "Kate I just love you so much. More than the very air that keeps me alive. I don't know what to do. Everything is such a mess. All I want is to be with you and Gracie. It is the only time that I truly happy."
Jack's cries had begun to make Kate weep in return, but she still had do this for Gracie. "It does not matter that we love each other don't you see, because in your world love has no place. It is all about power, money and status. That is why when Tom returns with the money you have to take it Jack and let us go with him."
" I don't want his money Kate!"
" Jack please."
At this Jack moved off the bed and began to pace back and forth tears still escaping his eyes. " So what was all this? When we made love it was not a new beginning, but it was goodbye!"
" Jack I don't know what it was. I love you so much when you look at me with those eyes and hold me with those strong arms I just get lost in you. Almost if the rest of the world does not exist expect for you and me. Then when I realize that the rest of the world is there and it comes to me I have others depending on me. Gracie needs me as a Mother to find the best life for her and Tom I owe him so much, he is my best friend and I can't just turn my back on him. Jack if it was just us we could be together, but we live in a world where our love can not grow. As much as I hate it neither one of us really has a choice in the matter."
"You know Kate that you and Gracie just light up my world, but in return I can't give you the life that you deserve. " Jack paused for a moment then let out a deep breath that he was holding. "I want you to go get Gracie and get all your things together and meet me at the stables."
"Jack what is going on?"
Jack went over to her and bent down on his knees so that they were now face to face. He brought his hand up to her cheek.
" If I can't give you the life that you both deserve then I guess I will take you to someone that can."
Kate grabbed Gracie and the few things that matter to them in life. She tired and tired to convince Rose to come with them, but Rose just simply replied with my life is here and this is the only one that I have and known.
When Kate finally realized that Rose was not going to leave with them she wrapped her arms around her and said a tearful goodbye.
"Rose you have been family to me and Gracie over these past years and I will never forget that or you."
Gracie then slowly moved over to Rose. "Rose!" she said as she jumped into her arms. " Will you come and visit us at our new home?"
" Oh I don't know about that baby girl, but I want you to know no matter happens in life that you are special! Do you hear me Gracie?"
Gracie just nodded her little head to the older woman. Kate and Gracie got more hugs before it was time to go. Kate was not sure why, but it was harder for her to say goodbye to Rose than it was her family all those years ago. She truly did love Rose and the three of them had been such a solid family over these past years she did not know what she was going to do with out her in her life. They would never forget Rose and they were going to miss her everyday of their lives without her.
Once they reached the stables Jack barley looked at her, but she knew that it was due to the fact it was too painful for him to look at her knowing that he was going to say goodbye.
She told Mr. Locke where to take them and just like they were leaving the Shepherd estate. A place that Kate hated and loved at the same time, so many different emotions were pulsing through her veins.
As they continued the journey back to her village, Jack had Gracie in his lap and was finishing the story about the sea monsters, pirates and princess the one he promised he would finish telling her. Kate would not dare look at them, just the sounds of him telling the story to their daughter brought tears to her eyes the fact that this would be the last time that he told his daughter a story.
Once Jack finished the story he placed Gracie off his lap and set her in front of him and got something out of his pocket. He then placed a heart shaped necklace in the palm of her hand.
"Jack it is beautiful!" The little girl stated all wide eyed, never in her young life receiving such an elegant gift.
" I'm happy that you like it Gracie. It is very important to me. It belonged to my mother; she gave it to me right before she died. I was a little boy only a couple of years older than you Gracie and I was very upset and she told me that even though I was never going to see her again she wanted me to know that her heart would always be with me and that this necklace was proof of that. Now, Gracie I'm giving it to you."
" Jack wont you miss your mommy's heart?"
"No ,because I will always have her heart with me with or without the necklace." Jack then brought his hand over to his own heart. "Gracie your about to start a new exciting life with your mother and Tom. Even though I wont be there in your in life, I want you to know that my heart dear Gracie will always be with you. I want you to wear this necklace and know that I love you."
Gracie jumped into his lap and wrapped her tiny arms around him. She then whispered into his ear, "I love you too Jack."
Jack felt his heart gush with joy and sadness at the same time. He was not sure how he was going to let this perfect little girl slip away from him forever. Jack knew that he had done so much wrong by them and he knew that it did not make up for what he had done and more importantly not done for them, but in someway he hoped that by letting go and giving them the life they deserved would help.
Jack was so focused on holding Gracie in his arms that he did not even realize that the carriage had stopped.
Kate had already bolted out of the carriage and already had their bags. Her head was cast downward, to hide the tears would not stop flowing.
Jack carried Gracie out and placed her on the ground. "Goodbye Gracie and always remember that you have and always will hold my heart."
" Jack why can't you come with us?" Tears began to fall down Gracie's cheek.
" Gracie I would love nothing more to come with you and your mother, but I have so many other lives depending on me to guide and care for them. Don't worry Gracie Tom is going to take such good care of you and I know this, because your Mommy trusts him."
Jack then walked Gracie over to Kate and placed his little girls hand into her mother's hand.
" I would walk you to the door, but I think it would just be to painful."
Kate meekly nodded her head in a knowing manner.
"Kate, would you at least look at me one last time to say goodbye?"
" I I…I can't" Kate let out in between her tears.
" Jack once I look into your eyes I will not be strong enough to do this. It has to be this way." With that Kate walked away towards Tom and her new life with him.
Jack stood there just watching them walk away from him. It took every power in his body not to go after them and make them stay with him.
He knew that John was watching him cry like a baby, but Jack did even care that he looked weak in front of another man. His one and only true love and his little girl where leaving his life forever he could not even pretend to put up a front of being tough and uncaring.
Then John made a loud cough so to bring attention to himself. Jack then looked over to the older man.
" Jack I know it is not place to say anything, but I just don't like to see you this sad is all. If they make you happy Jack you should make them stay. Everyman should have the right to that one woman that makes him happy. You have every legal right to keep them. You still own her and that is your daughter. I guess my question here is why are you letting go?"
Jack then looked back in the direction that Kate and Gracie where once in.
In almost a whisper he replied, "because I love them."