I own nothing except for my original characters. No money is being made off of this piece of entertainment. So enjoy it.
Author's Note: Well it's down to the wire... Two more chapters to go... Please be sure you've voted in my poll on deciding who will win the Cannonball Run. Because the poll closes in two days from the time I post this chapter.
Africa: Welcome to the Jungle
Kevin and Olivia sit in front of the camera, playing Go Fish as they fail to notice that they're on the air.
"Hey you're on!" the cameraman whispered, the two stopped their card game to smile and address the worldwide audience.
"Well the Cannonballers have begun their trip through Africa." Kevin said. "And with this being the last continent, you know the race is going to be getting even tougher. But we still have no prize money to give the winners. But I am told the Cannonballers will be detaining and interrogating anybody with knowledge of who stole the prize money, and the do know who to capture and 'interrogate'."
Well Kevin was right in that the Cannonballers knew who to go after, as Team Vercetti had just captured Demyx, who was trying to take them out with his Japanese sitar, and chosen to hold him over the crocodile infested Nile River, on a tree branch.
"Oh come on guys! Not even I know where the money went!" Demyx said as he is only dangling a foot away from the water and the crocodiles are gathering below him, waiting for him to fall in and make him their meal for the day.
"You know we could just slowly cut the rope." Woozie said.
"Okay fine! That chick from Umbrella was given the prize money by Carmen Sandiego! It's in Mali, but good luck at trying to get it back. Because General Kazim leads that country with a iron fist and fear. He even released some kind of new diease in his country to ensure the respect from his people."
"That wasn't so bad." Woozie said. "Thank you."
All four got back into the Magnum and left, leaving Demyx dangling over the river.
"Son of a whore!" he shouts out.
XXX
The Melizanno, the San Marino Spyder and the Compton were all racing through a small town in the Sudan, avoiding attacks from both Kazim's troops and a few mutations set loose by the Umbrella Corporation.
Lara fired a few shots from her twin pistols while Natasha drove the Melizanno. Ahead of them, the Winchester brothers launched a few missiles at a wave of the mutations as they sped on.
"Good job, Sam." said Dean as Sam took out an advancing group of mutated lions. "Now if we can just get out of here.".
"You're the one who's driving!" Sam retorted.
Suddenly, the Melizanno swerved around the Compton and took the lead.
"Sorry guys, but it's still a race!" Amanda called.
"You could have just honked the horn, Nat!" Heather said.
"That would have been rude." Natasha replied.
"Okay, just get us ahead while I reload." said Lara. "Any more nasties and I'll take cared of them.".
The Melizanno plowed through another lion mutant, splattering it over the windshield. Natasha winced and activated the wipers.
"Those girls are something!" Dean said in admiration.
"I bet that gives you an idea for another porn website, huh?" said Sam. "Busty jumpsuit babes dot com, right?".
Behind them, the San Marino Spyder was making up ground. Takeshi had already braked and turned the car sideways making two jeeps full of Kazim troops go off the road and into a nearby river.
As he started up and drove off again, he smirked.
"Another car chase cliche: cars love to drown." he said.
"Less chit-chat, more go-go!" said Liz. "We need to get ahead and find out where Sandiego is handing over the cash".
As the Melizanno and the Compton still jockied for the lead, two trains went across a railroad crossing near the edge of the town. Both Natasha and Dean gritted their teeth and managed to jump their vehicles over a pair of flat train cars and landed on the other side.
The San Marino Spyder missed the two flat cars as it caught up, but briefly, two cars with an open door in each passed each other ansd Takeshi jumped his car through the gap and also reached the other side.
"I'd hate to be a stuntman doing twenty takes of that!" Liz remarked.
As the three Cannonball vehicles had managed to leave their pursuers in the dust they approached a bridge. Little did they know that as they went onto the bridge, a group of Kazim loyalists detonated a bomb at the base of the bridge and it began to collapse behind.
"Holy S-H-I-T!" sam yelled.
"Hang on!" said Dean as he activated their nitrous. Natasha and Takeshi did the same as more and more bits of the bridge dropped off.
"Watch out for that hole on the right!" said Liz.
"I wasn't gonna drive in there!" replied Takeshi.
The Melizanno avoided falling off an impromptu ramp that had been made by the collapse.
"That was TOO close!" said Lara.
"No sweat! I can handle this!" said Natasha.
As the three cars neared the end, Dean went up another 'ramp'.
"Okay, this is the last jump!" he said to sam as they jumped...and landed on another 'ramp'.
"Correction, this is the last one!" Dean said sheepishly.
"Are you sure?" said Sam.
"YES!" Dean yelled in annoyance.
The three cars reached the other end of the bridge in safety. As they prepared to head off on their way, they noticed the Cerrano parked at the side of the road. They also saw Team Kombat fighting with a group of Tengas and Grunts.
"What the...?" said Takeshi as he brought the San Marino Spyder to a halt.
Seeing that Team Kombat needed help, Liz leapt out of the car and joined in the fight with her Capoeira skills. Takeshi joined in with some martial arts of his own.
"Oh great, another fight!" said Natasha as the Melizanno and the Compton stopped as well.
"Shall we join the fracas, girls?" asked Lara.
"Of course." said Amanda and Heather in unison.
"What happened, you guys?" Liz called over to Liu as she fought off a pair of Tengas.
"THese guys were waiting to amush a few Cannonballers but we got the drop on them." said Liu as he took out three Grunts with a flying kick.
Kitana and Sonya took out a group of Tengas with a combination of Sonya's martial arts and Kitana's fan attacks.
Heather, Lara, Amanda and Johnny finished off the remaining Grunts while Takeshi knocked out the last Tenga.
"After seeing your moves, I bet you get pissed off when people say wrestling not for real." said Johnny.
"Bet your ass!" said Heather. "That was a hell of a workout.".
One of the Grunts got ready to get back up, but found himself staring down two shotgun barrels as the Winchester brothers took aim at him.
"I think you should quit while you're ahead, buddy!" said Sam.
"Amen." chipped in Dean.
"It doesn't matter." the Grunt snarled. "You guys are never gonna get back to the States in one piece...or with the prize money!".
"We'll see." said Sonya as she pulled out a tranquiliser gun. "Night night."
She shot a tranq dart into the Grunt's leg and knocked him out.
"Now, let's make tracks." said Kitana.
"I hope the others aren't having this much trouble." said Natasha.
"Don't say that! You'll jinx them!" said Sam.
"Sorry." Natasha replied sheepishly.
XXX
In fact Sam was a little too late in warning Natasha jinxing the other Cannonballers. As Team Geki was stopped a dozen tyrants on them. They quickly transform and fight the Tyrants to the best of their ability, with the core three activating their Kageki to become Super Gekirangers.
"(These things are tough!)" Retsu said. "(But we have to win!)"
XXX
In Khartoum, the Coach was managing to outrdistance both the Hot Rod and the Aqua as they
pursued it. Dave was behind the wheel of the Coach and kept manouevering the bus to prevent
either of the street racer teams from getting through.
"Oh come on, Dave!" said Jerry. "It's not such a big deal if we come in second."
"Wash your mouth out, son!" snapped Larrity. "Don't you forget that I wanted this company to
make me money!".
"What is it with you, Jerry?" asked Dave. "Every time opportunity knocks you turn into a
big, fat pussy.".
"Better than being a douche like you are!" said Dean.
"Oh, says you, retard!" said Black Steve.
"Shut up!" yelled Dean.
"You shut up, you potato head!" yelled Black Steve as he shoved Dean.
Dean fell right into Dave and caused him to swerve the bus wildly.
The Coach eventually swerved across two lanes of traffic and blocked each of them as it went
sideways.
"Hang on! I can do this!" said Memphis in the Hot Rod as he turned and drove the car up the
back ramp of a car transporter truck that was in front of them. Team Car Guys all whooped
with joy as they jumped over the Coach. They landed safely on the other side and sped off.
Meanwhile, the Aqua had driven onto the sidewalk and Speedy honked the horn as they narrowly
avoided hitting any pedestrians. As they passed a very ticked-off old lady, she whacked the
car with her umbrella.
"Sorry!" said Speedy.
They too passed the blockage and roared off.
"Way to go, Dave." Mary said sarcastically in the Coach.
"Aw, eat it, woman!" Dave said in response.
"HEY! You apologise to the lady, boy!" said Larrity.
"Show me a lady and I will!" replied Dave.
Both Mary and Clare angrily launched themselves at Dave and started a fight.
"Hey! Shouldn't we get going?" asked Todd.
"Shut up! I'm enjoying this!" said Benny as he watched the fight.
XXX
Team Banzai were driving along towards N'djamena in Chad when as New Jersey took a phone
call.
"Are you serious, Rawhide?" he asked. After a pause, he said "Okay, I'll let him know.".
As he hung up the phone, he looked at Buckaroo with a concerned expression.
"Apparently there was a break-in at the Institute's garage. They stole that test vehicle
Murdock and B.A. let us keep last year." New Jersey said.
"You mean the SLF450X?" asked Buckaroo.
"Yeah! Rawhide, Reno and Pinky are all kicking themselves that they let security slip like
that." said Jersey.
"Well, it was probably poker night last night." Buckaroo said, smiling.
"You don't seem too concerned, Buck." said Perfect Tommy.
"Well, you see, the SLF was being fixed. It has a problem holding together when it reaches
150 mph. So whoever stole it will find some trouble when they try to use it." said
Buckaroo. He then pulled out his go-phone and pressed a button on it. "And I just activated
the homing device. We'll find it.".
Jersey had a look at the map on the go-phone. "It's in Tanzania according to this.".
"Well, then, hang on, guys!" said Buckaroo as he put his foot down. "Time to get the eff out
of Dodge!".
XXX
In Dodome, Tanzania, O'Malley and a lot of his troops had regropued and were now getting
ready for an all-out assault.
"Alright! This is it! No more foul-ups!" said O'Malley. "I'm going to Mali right now to
negotiate the return of the prize money with General Kazim. The rest of you are to find the
Cannonballers, and TERMINATE with extreme prejudice.".
He turned to Master Feng who was standing along with Tong Po. "Especially YOU, Feng! I want
Captain Chaos and Captain Fury taken out of the equation permanently. That way these racing
rejects will see that nobody makes a fool of us and gets away with it!".
"It will be my pleasure." said Feng. "I even brought a special vehicle to be prepared.".
He gestured towards a black Lincoln Town Car Hearse called the Romero.
"Excellent. Make sure it will be used wisely." said O'Malley. "Now all of you, get your
arses in gear!".
The various villains all made statements of agreement and went for their vehicles. Foyt and
Cruger went for the futuristic car known as the SLF450X which Watson and Hunter had stolen
from the Banzai Institute.
"Ironic, a Cannonballer's own weapon being used against the Cannonballers." said Foyt.
"Life's a bitch, isn't it?"
"True." said Cruger as he started up the SLF's engine with a powerful hum.
XXX
Somewhere in Uganda, the Negotiator was being chased by a group of Kazim's soldiers. Liquid
was doing a good job of keeping ahead of them.
"I think we're losing them now." said Leon.
"Yeah, but the trick is keeping 'em off our ass!" said Harry.
"Hold on! Turn into that park there! I have an idea!" said Otacon.
The Kazim troops had fallen behind but were now making up lost ground.
"(Don't let these assholes get away!)" the commanding officer said. "(The general wants
their heads!).
As they entered a clearing in the park, they heard a loud boom and braked their jeeps in
shock.
Somewhere behind them was an explosion, knocking a lot of debris around.
"(Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?)" went one of the soldiers.
The Negotiator drove forward and they saw some smoke coming from the gun barrel.
Liquid's voice came over the loud speaker. "That was just a warning shot over your heads."
he said. "We advise you to turn back at once or we will be forced to unleash our full weapon
potential!".
The soldiers turned to each other and mumbled words. After about a minute and a half they
all nodded reluctantly.
"All right." said the C.O. "We will go, but don't think you will have an easy ride.".
The jeeps started to drive away.
Inside the Negotiator, Liquid turned the loud speaker off and smiled at Otacon who was
blowing another bubble of pink bubble gum. There was no shell in the Negotiator's cannon.
They had merely turned the volume of the loud speaker up full and Otacon had snapped his gum
into the microphone, creating the explosion sound.
"That was a crazy plan, but it worked." said Harry. "I see you know your G.I. Joe
history.".
"What about me with the grenade, making it look more realistic?" asked Liquid.
"Yeah, that was great. I'm glad you can throw one a great distance." said Leon.
"Well, then, I think we should get going." said Otacon.
Just then, the ground rumbled. Team Konami looked concerned.
"That can't be good." said Harry.
Otacon looke out the hatch and saw that the Negotiator was now surrounded by three fully
armed tanks from Kazim's army.
"Aw, crap!" he said. "And we used our last grenade for the trick!".
"What about the One-Time Overthruster?" asked Leon.
"I, uh, unplugged it to put my MP3 player in to charge." said Henry.
The others glared at him.
"It'll take an hour to recharge!" yelled Otacon.
"Sorry!" said Henry.
"You...ignorant son-of-a-bitch dumb bastard!" Leon yelled. "Jesus H. Christ, I've seen some
dumb bastards in my time but YOU claim first prize!".
"Well, whose fault is it we used up all the REAL shells?" Henry retorted.
A Kazim soldier pulled out a megaphone and yelled at them in English.
"Your little trick didn't fool us!" he said. "Now come out with your hands up!".
"Well, we're not totally helpless." sighed Liquid as he activated their distress beacon.
XXX
Meanwhile, the Bootlegger and the Miyagi had both stopped briefly in Nairobi so that Cal and
Belle could take over driving duties for the respective cars. As they were having a little
break, Andy and Randy had decided to take a little break in a small bar. Both of them had
been rather overdrinking the local beer.
"You know somethin', Randy?" Andy slurred. "You're my best friend...besides Belle that is."
"Yeah, I know." said Randy. "I bet Victor loves us too, I mean to pick both of us to be
racing superheroes.".
"I just gotta go to the bathroom." said Andy. "I'll be back in a minute."
Andy got up to go to the bathroom. As he headed around the corner leading to the restrooms,
he was suddenly hit by a hard kick in the stomach, and then someone gave him a karate chop
on the back of the neck. He fell unconscious. It was Tong Po who had hit him and he
laughed to himself.
Meanwhile, Randy was attempting to dance to some music playing on the jukebox, but felt a
little sting in the back of his neck. He reached to the back of his neck and pulled out a
tranquiliser dart.
"Aw, crap!" he said as he too fell unconscious.
Feng stepped forward, wearing the Total Anarchy mask with an evil smile on his face. Tong
Po joined him, carrying Andy over his shoulder.
"It would appear our foolish friends don't have their masks." Feng said. "I can't sense
their presences here.".
"Perfect!" said Tong Po. "Now we'll take both of them and make them suffer.".
"Indeed." said Feng. "Put them both in that coffin in the back of the Romero. And Tong
Po...DON'T be gentle.".
The two villains laughed.
Five minutes later...
The Bootlegger and the Miyagi both pulled up outside the bar so Ricky, Cal and Belle could
pick up their partners and continue the race.
As Cal went into the bar, Feng and Tong Po laughed to themselves as they started up the
Romero and drove off. As they did, Tong Po put his hand out the window and flipped the
bird.
Belle saw it and looked annoyed.
"I never knew undertakers could be such assholes." she said.
"Hell, Stone Cold could testify to that fact." said Ricky. "I heard that in the WWE one
time..."
Cal suddenly rushed out and joined them, looking very concerned,
"They're gone!" he said.
"What? Without their masks?" asked Belle. She then remembered the Romero and then glared
after it.
"Come on, guys!" she said as she rushed to the drivers' side of the Miyagi. "It's time for
us to come to the rescue!".
"You know where to go?" asked Ricky as he and Cal got back in the Bootlegger.
"Just keep your eyes on the Honda shaped blur, Ricky!" said Belle as she drove off at high
speed.
The Bootlegger performed a burnout and joined the chase.
XXX
In Zaire, the SLF had managed to find the Zenda and Cruger and Foyt were now relentlessly
chasing James and Heather.
"You wanna get hot?" yelled Cruger. "Then suck on this for a while."
He slammed the SLF into the side of the Zenda, but Heather kept going.
"I hope we lose this moron soon!" said Heather. "I heard about what that jet car thing can
do!".
"Don't worry. We won't surrender!" said James.
The Zenda reached the 200 mph mark and managed to get a good lead on the SLF.
Cruger laughed and put his foot down in the SLF and the thrusters on it let out flame as he
pushed the vehicle past the 150 mph mark and began to catch up.
As they gained ground on the Zenda, Foyt heard a strange clang and looked out her window.
She gasped as she saw that the SLF's body work was starting to fall off.
"Uh, Danny?" she said. "I think we have a problem!".
"Bullshit!" said Cruger. "Nothing's gonna stop us now! NOTHING!"
The engine on the SLF started to sputter and then the glass canopy covering the cockpit flew
off.
"What the...?" said Danny.
The SLF started to lose speed and eventually came to a halt. The futuristic vehicle
shuddered and then completely collapsed around the two villains.
"SHIT!" yelled Danny.
"You just couldn't wait, could you, dumb ass!" yelled Foyt.
The Bonsai then drove up and Team Banzai got out.
"Oh boy." said Perfect Tommy. "Looks like Seth will have to put more hours in to fixing the
SLF."
"Well at least we've found it." said Jersey.
All three of them pulled out their guns and aimed them at Danny and Foyt.
"Now then, I bet there are some people who'd love to have a word with you two." said
Buckaroo. "Can anyone say 'bargaining chips'?".
Meanwhile, in the Zenda, Heather took a look at their heads-up display and saw a light
flashing on it.
'That's a distress call in Uganda.' she said. 'It's from Team Konami.'.
'Yeah. I see that Snake's team are heading that way as well.' said James.
"Makes sense since his friend Otacon's on the Konami team. What do you say we give 'em a bit
of help?".
"No prob.". said James as he changed course for Uganda.
XXX
The Miyagi and the Bootlegger had caught up with the Romero and were now chasing it.
Tong Po was managing to keep ahead of the two vehicles, but suddenly he drove over a
broken bottle that somebody had left on the road and punctured his front tyre.
"You idiot!" yelled Feng as they went out of control. Tong Po tried to steer but ended
up driving straight into a palm tree. The impact caused the back door of the Romero to
open and the coffin in the bck to fall out. As it hit the ground, the lid popped open and
Andy and Randy both climbed out.
Andy was gasping for breath. "Next time, I get to be on top!" he growled at Randy.
"Sorry." said Randy sarcastically.
The Miyagi and the Bootlegger had both come to a halt and Belle and Ricky threw the Chaos
and Fury masks towards Andy and Randy just as Tong Po and Feng had gotten out of the
Romero. The two Captains pulled their masks on and turned to face the two villains.
Tong Po snarled and threw a Muay Thai kick at the palm tree, nearly knocking it down.
"Who's first?" he asked with a sadistic smile.
Fury and Chaos looked at each other and nodded. They both took running jumps towards
Tong Po and both kicked him square in the chest, knocking him backwards. He flew towards
Feng, who was struggling to get the Total Anarchy mask on. Tong Po xcrashed right into
him and knocked him unconscious. Tong Po was knocked unconscious himself.
"Well done, good citizens." said Chaos. "We are grateful you came to our aid.".
"Well maybe this'll teach you to not let your guard down, huh Captains?" said Belle.
"Fear not. We shall not get careless again." said Fury.
"What should we do with these guys?" asked Cal as he looked at the unconscious Feng and
Tong Po.
Ricky smirked to himself. "I think I have just the thing in mind.".
A few minutes later...
The Bootlegger and the Miyagi were both off on their was looking a bit worried.
"You DO realise that when those guys find out, they'll kill you, right Ricky?" he said.
"Don't worry. I'll probably die laughing long before that." Ricky chuckled.
XXX
The Zenda had rendezvoused with the Fairview in Masaka and Team Stealth and Team Silent Hill
were keeping their eyes on a small jailhouse.
"That's where they're keeping Otacon and the others." said Snake as he watched with his
binoculars.
"Just two guards. AND they're both asleep." commented James.
"Doesn't mean there are no other soldiers." remarked Ethan. "Any sign of them?".
"Yeah. They're all over in that bar over there, celebrating their 'victory'." said Sam.
"We'll have to keep them busy while we bust Otacon and the others out." said Heather. "I
think I can help in that area.".
"How so?" asked James.
"Isn't it obvious?" asked Scott. "The soldier boys at the bar are all drunk and horny. I
think that will distract them.".
"OKay, but we need a backup plan." said Ethan.
"Got it here." said Sam as he pulled out an AA-12 shotgun. Scott pulled out another one.
"These things fire 300 rounds per minute, AND are very loud." Sam said. "Any of Kazim's guys
start some shit, we let 'em have it!".
"But.." James began.
"Don't worry." scott reassured. "Sam's is the only one with live ammo. And he intends to use
it to take out their vehicles. Mine shoots tranq darts, but it's still very loud. With a
bunch of half-drunk soldiers hearing a hell of a lot of battle noise, tell me who's thinking
straight."
"Amen, brother." said Sam.
"In that case, I'll help you out as well." said Snake as he pulled out his silenced tranq
pistol.
"Then James and I will break the guys out." said Ethan.
"Okay, let's go!" said James.
XXX
On the road to Masaka, the Brooklyn was driving around the speed limit. As Bugs drove the
old Mustang down the road, he noticed a speed trap cop and brought the car to a halt. The
cop went over to his window, looking confused.
"What are you stopping for?" the cop asked. "You weren't breaking any law.".
"Just wonderin' what you're lookin'for, Sarge." said Bugs.
"I'm looking for speeders." the cop said.
"What's a speeder?" Daffy asked mischeviously.
The cop smiled a bit at Team Looney Toons' apparent naivete.
"A speeder is a guy who goes like this." he said and then made a zooming engine roar sound.
"Oh, like this?" said Bugs. He then made a 'pwt, pwt, pwt' sound, accidentally getting a
little spittle on the cops' uniform.
"No, like this." said the cop as he repeated the 'roaring engine' sound.
"OH! I get it!" said Daffy, and then he repeated the 'pwt, pwt, pwt' sound and added a
'cuckoo' noise at the end.
The cop was getting annoyed.
"I didn't say.." he began and then made the 'pwt, pwt, pwt, cuckoo' noise, "I said...", then
he made the roaring engine noise, "And if you go...", he made the 'pwt, pwt, pwt, cuckoo'
noise again, '...one more time, I'll give you a ticket! Got it?".
"so, I say, so y'all don't want us to go.." began Foghorn...and then HE made the 'pwt, pwt,
pwt, cuckoo' noise.
"That's right." said the cop, failing to realise what had just happened.
"Okay, well good luck rounding up the speeders, Sarge." said Bugs as he started the Brooklyn
up again. He then took off at high speed.
"HEY!" the cop yelled.
As the Brooklyn sped off, Bugs said "There's nothing like a highly intellectual
discussion."
XXX
Back in Masaka, the Kazim soldiers in the bar were being 'entertained' by Heather, in a
very skimpy outfit, singing a sultry version of Elvis Presley's 'Love Me Tender'. A lot
of them were interjecting wolf whistles into the performance.
Meanwhile, at the jailhouse, Ethan had knocked out the two guards on the front porch,
while James had driven the Zenda around the back.
James went up to the barred window of the cell at the back of the building which Otacon
and the others were being held in.
He let out a little whistle.
Liquid and Henry came to the window.
"Hey, you guys." James whispered. "We're here to get you out.".
"What about Kazim's guys?" Henry whispered back.
"Don't worry. They've been taken care of." whispered Ethan as he joined James.
"Here. Tie this around the bars." whispered James as he gave Liquid one end of a piece of
rope.
"I hope this will work." Liquid replied.
"No problem." James winked as he and Ethan both ran for the Zenda. The other end of the
rope was tied to its'back bumper. Ethan and James got inside and James started it up.
"Okay, Here we go!" said James as he gunned the engine and drove forward. The rope was
pulled taut and a wrenching sound was heard from the jailhouse in addition to the sound
of breaking wood.
In the bar, some of the soldiers had heard the noise and went to investigate. Snake,
hiding in the bushes on the left side, quickly took them out with his tranq gun.
The roaring of the Zenda's engine became louder as did the noise as he attempted to pull
the bars off the window.
Suddenly, without warning, the jailhouse was lifted off its' foundations and the Zenda
took off...pulling the entire building along behind it.
"I don't think that was supposedv to happen." said Ethan.
"I guess they don't build jailhouses like they use to." said James.
By now, all of the soldiers had been attracted by the noise and ran outside the bar.
"Fire in the hole!" yelled Sam from a treetop as he opened fire on their vehicles with
his shotgun, blowing a lot of them sky high and scaring the soldiers witless. Scott
fired for the soldiers themselves, knocking many more of them out with his tranq darts.
Within a few minutes, the soldiers had all been knocked out and their vehicles disabled.
"Clear!" yelled Snake.
"Clear!" replied Scott.
"Clear!" said Sam as all three came out of their hiding places and joined each other.
Heather came out of the bar and joined them.
"Damn, those guns are loud!" she said.
"Now where are the others?" asked Snake.
Outside the town, the Zenda had finally stopped and stopped dragging the jailhouse behind
it. Ethan and James had gone around to the two unconscious guards who were still on the
front porch while the building was being pulled and searched their pockets. James looked embarrassed when Ethan did indeed find a set of keys in one of their
pockets.
"Have you ever heard of this wonderful thing called 'subtlety'?" Ethan asked
sarcastically as he went to release Team Konami.
The Fairview drove up, accompanied by the Negotiator, which Scott and Sam were driving.
Otacon and the others ran out of the jailhouse as they were released and Scott and Sam
approached them and handed them the keys to the Negotiator.
"Thanks, guys." said Leon. "I could have done without that whole Looney Toons thing
though.".
"Well, you're out, aren't you?" asked James.
"Right! Let's go!" said Snake as the teams returned to their vehicles.
XXX
"We have some music for you all to enjoy, as the racers race through the African jungle." Kevin said. "So here now, playing Baltimora's 'Tarzan Boy' is 16 Buttons of Justice and DVDA."
As the band starts up the song, the Sentinel XS and the Landstalker Mk II raced through the jungles of Africa. While being chased by Kazim's troops and the Saxon.
"How did William get that semi truck rig?" Tim asked himself. "Great, we have to outrin the souped up rig from Hell and a bunch of Mali soldiers that have no soul! Can this race get any worse!"
Song: "Tarzan Boy" by Baltimora
"Catch them! I want them alive!" William shouted into his radio to Kazim's soldiers. They all acknowledged the drug king's orders and pulled ahead of the Saxon.
"What did we ever do to them that made them chase us!" Giovanni asked.
"Oh nothing..." Ash said. "But General Kazim is an asshole."
Nearby the Rattler is parked with Arbitor and Chief aiming their sniper rifles at the jeeps and tanks from their sniper posts in the trees.
"Let's get them out of this mess." Arbitor said. "So we can join Adam and the others in Mali."
"On it..." Chief said, firing his rifle first. The round punctures the engine of a jeep. Causing it to flip over and land on it's roof. Luckily the soldier at the gun turret ducked back into the jeep as it was hit. Arbitor fired next and took out another jeep. Down below William, Cruger and Janice knew someone was sniping them in the trees.
"Son of a bitch!" William said. "The Cannonballers got snipers in the trees!"
"That was only two jeeps that went down!" Cruger said. "There is only two snipers above us! I say we pull out before those two take us all out!"
"I agree!" Janice said.
"They're retreating." Tim said as he saw them leave in the rearview mirror." Whoever was shooting at them must've did the trick."
"Now let's get them to Mali." Arbitor said. "Adam will need all of the hep he can get to reclaim th eprize money."
XXX
In Gaborona, Botswana, the Boltus had come up to a traffic light and stopped. As Cloud
tapped his hand impatiently on the steering wheel, Vincent suddenly sensed that something
was wrong.
He looked behind them and saw trouble approaching.
Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz were roaring towards them in a green 1973 Oldsmobile Delta 88
callede the Rosalita.
"Cloud, GO! GO! GO!" he yelled.
Cloud had noticed the three villains in the rearview asnd quickly peeled out, scraping
past some of the traffic in front of them. People honked their horns angrily as the
Boltus and the Rosalita got involved in a chase.
Kadaj aimed a gun out of his side of the Rosalita and opened fire on the Boltus.
"Hang on! I've got this!" said Barret as hwe climbed out into the bed of the Boltus and
opened fire on the Rosalita with his gun arm.
"Goddamn it!" yelled Loz as he tried to avoid Barret's fire.
"Hold the wheel steady so we can shoot!" yelled Yazoo as he joined Kadaj in shooting at
the Boltus.
The Rosalita gained some ground on the Boltus.
"Oh no you don't!" said Cloud as he stepped on the brakes. The Rosalita overtook the
Boltus and Cloud then floored the accelerator. The Boltus was now chasing the Rosalita.
Kadaj and Yazoo turned around to try and shoot at Team AVALANCHE who were now behind
them.
"Yuffie, you ready?" asked Tifa as she absorbed a Gravity materia into her skin.
"You bet!" said Yuffie as she did the same.
Both girls pointed their hands towards Kadaj and Yazoo's gun hands.
"Demi3!" they both yelled as thry cast their most powerful gravity spells.
Kadaj and Yazoo suddenly felt their hands being weighed down and they dropped their guns
as a result.
Loz grunted in anger and drove up the entrace ramp of a multi-storey car park. The Boltus
followed them as they continued to drive farther up the levels.
As the Boltus reached the top storey, the Rosalita had turned around to face it.
"Time to play chicken by the look of things." said Cloud. "We need a plan.".
"Taken care of." said Vincent as he took out another materia orb and absorbed it.
Loz revved the engine of the Rosalita menacingly and Cloud did the same with the Boltus.
Both vehicles took off from their starting points and drove towards each other at full
speed.
Loz laughed sadistically as he prepared to ram the Boltus head on.
Vincent then reached out his hand, pointing at Loz.
"Sleepel!" he yelled.
The sleep spell immediatey came over Loz and he nodded off at the wheel... with his foot
still to the floor.
"YOU IDIOT!" Kadaj and Yazoo both yelled as the Rosalita went out of control. The Boltus
swerved around it as it drove towards the edge of the roof.
Kadaj grabbed Loz as he and Yazoo dived out of the Rosalita, seconds before it went off
the edge of the roof and fell to its'destruction on the ground eight stories elow them.
Cloud happily honked the Boltus' horn, waved a salute out the window and drove off.
Kadaj and Yazoo both glared at the still sleeping Loz.
"Would you miss him if I killed him?" asked Yazoo.
"Not in the least." replied Kadaj. "But we have bigger fish to fry. Let's meet up with
the others."
"How?" asked Yazoo.
"Simple. We stick our thumbs out and hope." Kadaj replied.
XXX
Back in Kenya, Hunter and Carson walked into a small town police station with some money
ready. Carson approached the desk sergeant.
"Are you here for those two guys with the hearse we picked up yesterday?" the sergeant
asked.
"That's right." said Carson. "We have their bail money here.".
"Okay. I'll take you to them." sad the officer as he got his keys out and lead the two to
the cells.
"We heard you say it was good luck thatn you got to them first." Hunter commented.
"Indeed it was." said the officer as they approached the cells. "Some people would take
great offence to the statement they were making.".
"What statement?" asked Carson as they entered the cell area. The two villains then got
a look at Tong Po and Feng in the cell in front of them and tried hard to suppress their
chuckling.
Tong Po and Feng had both been dressed in hot pink T-shirts and hot pants, their hair had
been styled up in a girly way and both men had make up and mascara smeared on their
faces. Feng's T-shirt was adorned with the logo 'We're Here, we're Queer, Get used to
it!'.
"Aw shut up and get us out of here, you morons!" yelled Tong Po.
"Oooh! Someone missed their Mocha Choco Latte today!" Carson said sarcasticaly in a girly
way.
XXX
The Vertigo pulled into a gas station in Mali. Adam made sure that the coast was clear before getting out and pumping gas into the car. He made sure the clerk inside wasn't looking and turned to Eve, who got out and generated a snowball. Where she threw it into the sky, and archeologist Dirk Pitt, his partner in crime Al Giordio and finally World Health Organization doctor Eva Rojas MD pulled into the gas station. Dirk motioned for the restrooms and Adam told Eve to watch the car. The two men went into the men's room. While the clerk called General Kazim.
"You're the guy who wants to take down Tri Cell and General Kazim?" Dirk asked as he urinated in the urinal. Adam didn't have to go and only pretended to take a leak. "Alright here is what is going on. The Umbrella Corporation is no more. Their now former employess are a apart of Tri Cell, a new corporation that is taking up Umbrella's old mission of making biological weapons. Now they have some pretty nasty stuff, and one of them is a disease called Las Plagas."
"I'm familiar with Plagas Dirk." Adam said. "I was briefed on it from Leon Kennedy himself, and it's a bitch to deal with."
"It gets even worse, Umbrella once had a laboratory underneath some ruins in the African savanah, this facility was responsible for their very first weapon, created from flowers that were grown below the ground. Tri Cell learned about it and created a new virus called Uroboros. Even worse than Plagas, which Kazim is using as his ace in the hole in case you best him.
Back outside Eva was telling Eve about the condition of Mali. Which wasn't very good.
"Kazim is using Las Plagas on his own people and even soldiers who volunteer." Eva told Eve. They noticed several jeeps pull into the gas station. "Uh oh..."
The soldiers who got out of the jeeps walked towards the two women and man. With their AK-47s aimed at their heads. Eve quickly generates a icicle spear and hurls it at the soldiers, who in turn ducked and gave Eve time to get Al and Eva away from the gas station. Eve quickly calls Adam on her cellphone and notify him of the situation.
The clerk left the store, trying to get away from the impending explosion that is sure to occur in about a minute. Until one of Kazim's troops grabs him in a headlock and injects a black liquid into him. Within seconds black worm like creatures engulf both men and glowing orange pods grow from their bodies.
Adam and Dirk quickly run out of the bathroom to join in on the fire fight between Kazim's troops and Eve. Adam hurls fireballs at their jeeps, avoiding the gas pumps. However Kazim's troops retreat when they see the now ten foot tall creature stalking towards them. Adam notices it too, and asks Dirk if that is Uroboros.
"Is that...?"
"Yes it is. It's Uroboros. And it's weakness is fire."
"Tell Eve to get out of here immediately, and you leave too." Adam said as he walked towards the creature. "I'll handle this."
Dirk did as he was told, and when both Dirk's team and Eve were clear from the explosion that was going to take place. Adam generated fire all over his body.
XXX
Eve and Dirk stopped their vehicles and watched the gas station from the safe distance allowed. They saw the entire place go up in a flaming explosion, complete with a mushroom cloud. Then they saw a fiery figure fly towards them. It is Adam, who used his pyrokinesis to destroy the Uroboros monster and fly away from the burning gas station.
"THAT was fun!" he declared when he landed with a smile. Then he handed Dirk a slip of paper. "Here... That's the phone number for the field commander of the UN Peacekeeping Forces in Iran. Tell him that they're needed in Mali and immediately."
"Will do... And we'll see you in the capitol city." Dirk then drove away to Kazim's palace for the final showdown.
XXX
All five Blood Gulch teams waited for the others to arrive, as they were the first to arrive in Mali for the showdown.
"They're late!" Sarge said. "We need to get this show on the road soon or we'll miss the opportunity for a surprise attack."
Soon the Vertigo, Rattler, Sentinel XS and Landstalker Mk II pulled up to the Bloodgulch crew. With the vehicles respective passengers climing out of them.
"About time!" Grif said. "What happened?"
"We had a little problem at the gas station." Adam said. "Problem solved and there is no more gas station."
"Nice..." Grif looked and saw the Eiswolf and Atlus pull up.
"You here to join the raid?" Tucker asked the new arrivals.
"You bet your sweet ass we are!" Shinn said. "And we brought some 'help'."
The Destiny, Infinite Justice, Impulse and Strike Freedom Gundams landed onto the ground. Their parachutes blow away into the wind.
"We're going to kick some serious ass in Mali." Caboose said.
XXX
Adam led the Cannonballers into the palace, but found security to be a bit lacking.
"Where is everybody?" Chief asked. "This place is a ghost town."
"That's because we had other plans for the security." Lilith walks out with Kazim by her side. "Oh how I do love a nice family reunion. Too bad there are too many unwelcome guests here. I must take care of you all right now..."
She takes a syringe with Uroboros injects herself with it. Soon she's overcome with the effects of the uncontrolable virus, Kazim tries to back away and flee, but gets caught up in the transformation of Lilith. Soon both are combined into one horrific monster.
"Stand back everyone." Adam said. He generates a few fireballs to hurl at the monster. "I'll handle..."
He's cut off as several streams of beam energy slam into the monster from the sky. Once the chaos is over with, the Cannonballers stare at the charred remains of the monster, before looking upward into the sky and seeing the Force Impulse Gundam.
"What was that thing?" Lunamaria asked.
"Burnt BOWH." Shinn replied.
"BOWH?"
"Bio Organic Weapon from Hell."
"Ohhhhh."
Back on the ground the Cannonballers are complaining on how anti-climatiic this whole invasion was, but Adam reminds them all they still have to retrieve the prize money. So they search all over the palace for it. Adam and Eve find it inside a safe in Kazim's office. Adam used his powers to open the safe and inside was a metal briefcase. Eve grabs it and opens it, only to find...
"Monopoly money?"
Indeed it is play money from the Monopoly board game. The real prize money must be located somewhere else.
"Team Vercetti told us what their prisoner told them. That the money was right here in Mali." Adam said. "They were deceived."
XXX
"Well Cannonballers... I regret to inform you all that the prize money is still missing." Kevin said. "But there is some good news. Mr. Yates has just made an announcement that there is three hundred and fifty million for second place, while third place gets three hundred million. Not only that but Mr. Yates already confided in us on the location of said prize money for all three places. Cannonballers listen up, the prize money is actually believed to be in the small town of Eureka, Oregon. The same hometown that Team Eureka comes from. Now they've called in and told us to tell all of you Cannonballers, to Inside the MX2000, Carter and Henry watched the announcment to only the Cannonballers, over the internet.
"So we should wait for them to arrive to begin planning?" Carter asked.
"Yes we should." Henry said. He saw the Mitsumi 1000R and the Quasar pull up behind them.
"We just heard the announcement and chose to race over here." Eva said.
"How did you know to come here so fast?" Henry asked.
"(We were ahead of the teams and got horribly lost.)" Ryotaro said. "(Plus we had a little drag race in the air from Africa to the United States.)"
"Doesn't matter. It's great to see you guys here so early. The others are still in the Atlantic Ocean and will join us soon. Until then we can all rest in town and wait for the others. I'll show you around."
XXX
"Well that is it for the continent of Africa race fans." Kevin said. "If the Cannonballers are able to reclaim the prize money, then we can have a end to this race, and three winners to boot. So until next time fans, and here now is a special guest to the Cannonball Band. Please welcome the one, the only... Bon Jovi!"
Bon Jovi begins playing one of their songs to say farewell to Africa, and to wish the Cannonballers good luck in Eureka.
Song: "Never Say Die" by Bon Jovi
After the song ends, Kevin and Olivia shake the band members hands. Then Kevin says "Bon Jovi everybody! What an honor to have them make a surprise visit! The Cannonballers are going to get their prize money back! We'll see you when the Cannonballers cross that finish line outside in Liberty City! Good night!"
Author's Comment: After two and half years it's finally come down to this... One last chapter to go, and it will be epic. Well as epic as I can get it. See you in the final chapter readers. Enjoy this chapter, and I can't wait till this story is finally over.