Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or any of its characters.
Chapter 16
Taylor was sitting cross-legged at the end of a jetty at the far side of the lake when she heard footsteps behind her. She glanced over her shoulder. It was the sheriff. That was all she needed now. "What are you gonna do? Shoot me, or push me in?" Taylor turned away from him and nodded at the water. She did not get up.
"You've been gone most of the day, you're grandpa's worried about you."
Dismissing that statement Taylor made one of her own. "I haven't done anything illegal, so you can just leave me alone." Instead of hearing the man clomp off the wooden platform, she heard him move closer.
"I'm not leaving you here on your own, it'll be dark soon."
"What do you care?" Taylor lifted one of the smooth flat pebbles from the small pile she had sitting beside her, and skimmed it across the surface of the water. "This is police harassment."
"No its not. I'm off duty now." He reached down and took one of her stones. "It's easier if you're standing up." With a flick of his wrist the pebble bounced over the water, at least three times further than Taylor's had gone.
She shrugged at the advice, her dad had already taught her to skim properly. Taylor stood up. Cold and hungry now she wasn't going to kid herself that she'd be able to fight her way past him, he was kinda big. All she wanted to do right now was crawl into her bed and shut out the rest of the world by curling into a little ball under the covers. The only problem with that was that she'd have to pass her grandpa to do it, and she didn't want to face him.
The sheriff seemed to read her mind, about her stomach anyway. "You hungry?" he asked.
When Taylor turned round he was pulling a chocolate bar from his jacket pocket. Even though she didn't want to admit that she was hungry, she took it. "Thanks." Maybe he wasn't so bad after all.
o
Keeping her distance, Taylor took a bite before asking, "Is he angry?" Not that she cared if he was, but advanced warning was always good.
"No. I told you, he's worried. You took off without giving him the chance to explain."
Tears threatened to appear again, but she blinked them away. "I know what he meant, I heard him clear enough."
The sheriff shook his head. "You didn't let him finish."
Taylor glared at the man. Did he think she was dumb enough to fall for that? Her grandfather had had all day to come up with an excuse. "Whatever!"
He put his hand on her shoulder and got her moving. "Come on, you're going to have to go home sometime, might as well sort this mess out."
She didn't resist, Taylor was all out of fight, and needed to get this over with.
o
They walked back towards town together, Taylor still munching on the chocolate bar. When the store came into view Taylor began to have second thoughts about the confrontation waiting for her, and subconsciously slowed down. This proved to be a big mistake. It just alerted the sheriff to her change of mind, and he grabbed her easily when she tried to run. Taylor was still trying to wriggle free as he dragged her inside, the little bell above the door ringing, announcing their arrival.
At the jingle her grandfather appeared from somewhere out back. She had to admit he did look worried, not mad. Taylor stopped struggling and deliberately looked away from him. Instead she glared up at the sheriff. "You can let me go now, I'll stay!"
When he released her, Taylor straightened her t-shirt, before shoving her hands into the pocket of her jeans and stalking past her grandpa, straight up the stairs to her room. She might be home, but that didn't mean she had to talk, or listen for that matter, Taylor told herself as she slammed the door behind her with a resounding crash. Not wasting any time Taylor kicked off her sneakers as she crossed the floor, leaving them where they fell, before slipping out of her jeans and crawling under the covers. Curling up as small as she could, Taylor scrunched her eyes tightly shut and listened.
o
it wasn't long until she heard her bedroom door open, and the springs on her bed creak as her grandfather sat on the bed beside her.
"We need to talk." He said softly.
Taylor ignored him, willing him to leave.
"Come on Taylor, I know you're not asleep."
"Go ….. away!" She spat out.
"Taylor …."
"Go find someone else to talk to 'cause I'm ain't listening!"
"Alright, that's enough! You're as bad as your father, getting the wrong end of the stick, then running off half cocked!" Jack pulled the covers back. "Sit up."
Taylor hesitated.
"NOW!"
For a brief moment, an extremely brief moment, Taylor considered telling him to fuck off, but in the interests of self preservation decided against it. She reluctantly pushed herself up and backwards until she was leaning up against the headboard. Hugging her pillow Taylor stared straight ahead, just to make sure her grandpa couldn't make eye contact.
"You want to tell me what was going on in that head of yours when you stormed off this morning?" He sounded like her dad.
Still looking forwards, Taylor chewed on her bottom lip in an attempt to stop herself from crying. She replayed the conversation over again in her head, but stayed silent.
"You're not being fair." He told her, sounding hurt.
Now that was something she didn't hear very often. Normally they were the words that came out of her mouth. It piqued her interest, and she couldn't help glancing round at her grandpa, before resuming her stubborn stance.
"Fine. If you're not going to say anything, you can just listen."
Trapped on the bed Taylor didn't have much of a choice, even though she was tempted to cover her ears, like a little kid.
"I know your dad hasn't told you much about Kelly. He thought it was better to wait until you're older."
Taylor's temper flared. "Why? Cause I ain't as perfect as she was? Well that's just too bad, I never asked to be a substitute!" She flinched as her grandpa reached over and put a hand on her shoulder. Taylor didn't shake it off. The contact made her feel better, even though the angry part of her didn't want it to.
"A subsitute? How'd you manage to come up with that crazy idea?" He knew she was upset about him talking about Kelly, but how could she think that?"
"I'm not stupid. I know if Kelly hadn't died I wouldn't be here, I wouldn't be anything."
"Taylor you were not born to replace Kelly."
"Yeah right!" Now she did shake his hand off her shoulder."
He thought for a couple of seconds. "I want you to think about something…..What if Kelly had a brother or sister, would that make them a reserve? Or what if you end up with a little brother or sister, would they only be there in case something happens to you?" Jackson watched his granddaughter carefully. From all outward appearances it looked as if Taylor was ignoring him, but he knew she was thinking.
"Do you think this brother or sister would be exactly like Kelly, or exactly like you?"
Taylor gave the slightest shake of her head.
"Everyone's different Taylor, and believe me no-ones perfect. Not me, not your dad, not you and not Kelly."
"Does that mean Kelly screwed up, though she went to Sunday school?"
"Sure she did."
Taylor was thinking this over when she remembered the part that had really hurt. "You said that even when I was born it wasn't the same!" Tears springing up again, she scrunched her eyes closed briefly, to stop them falling.
"I did say that." Jack admitted. "But you didn't let me finish, you just ran off."
That earned him a glare, but he didn't mind, at least he knew she was listening. "When Shannon and Kelly were killed, it did destroy your dad, and no he never really got over it." He could see Taylor begin to tense up in anticipation of what she thought he was going to say next, so he moved a little closer and put his arm around her.
"The accident changed him Taylor. Your dad used to be a lot like Tony."
Taylor looked at him in disbelief. "Like Tony?"
He grinned. "I know it's hard for you to imagine, but he was. Dumb pranks and goofball attitude included. Then after the accident he left the marines, hell bent on revenge and joined NCIS. He knew there was no way to change what had happened, but he was intent on trying to stop it happening to anyone else, and if he couldn't do that, he could at least make people pay for their crimes."
Taylor might have been upset and angry, but she wasn't slow. "What do you mean revenge? I thought it was an accident." She asked suspiciously.
"Your dad wants to be the one to explain what happened, so you'll have to ask him about that." When she didn't argue he continued. "When you were born it was a whole new start for your dad, and what I was trying to say this morning was that it wasn't the same as when Kelly was born, because he was absolutely terrified that something would happen to you too. It's always somewhere in the back of his mind he could lose you too. That's the ONLY reason it was different. Do you understand now? You're not a replacement, and he doesn't love you any less, he's just scared he can't protect you enough."
Taylor wasn't sure how to respond. It didn't seem to be something her grandpa would make up, and it did explain how her dad reacted when she did anything dangerous. Nodding, she relaxed and leaned into him before looking up at him sheepishly. "You couldn't have said that this morning?" Making it sound as if it was all his fault.
"You weren't supposed to be listening, you were supposed to be working. Which reminds me, you're going to have to finish off the other side of the church tomorrow, seeing you left in such a rush." He felt her shrug. "What, you're not going to put up a fight?"
"Nope. For a while today I was afraid I was gonna have to start goin' to Sunday school like Kelly did, and anything's better than that, even cleaning."