My Hero
Chapter Six
Carlisle's POV
I watched as she stared at the table, slowly swirling the coffee in the cup with her hands. The tension was overpowering and I longed to know what she was struggling to say. I didn't want to force her, though; I was still surprised that she was keeping company with me. I was dangerous, but all thoughts of what I could do disappeared from my mind as I gazed forward at her thoughtful face.
"I..." she opened her mouth and closed it again, laughing nervously. The sound was like beautiful music and I closed my eyes briefly, savouring it.
She looked up to meet my eyes when I opened them, and I was entranced.
"I'm..." she breathed. "I think I'm… p-pregnant."
I couldn't say anything for a few moments; I just stared at her in disbelief. That was certainly the very last thing that I'd expected.
While I was caught up in my thoughts, I hadn't remembered her partner; it seemed that things were becoming pretty serious now. I couldn't control the jealousy which overwhelmed me, but deep down I wanted to feel happy for her.
So I tried.
"That's-" I began, completely lost for words. "That's great news, Bella, congratulations."
My words sounded monotonous and dead to me, probably because I didn't mean them at all. I couldn't help myself; I didn't like Bella being with anyone else, which was completely wrong. I didn't know why; I knew I was just being selfish and irrational. Her soft voice interrupted my thoughts.
"Thanks," she whispered, and there was a tone to her reply which made me speak.
"You don't sound very pleased..." I said quietly, making her look up. Her eyes were troubled, as usual.
"I... I'm just not sure if I'm p-prepared-" she shrugged, hiding her eyes as she sipped at her drink. Her voice was quivering and she sounded scared. I didn't think about my actions, I just reached out to grab her hand, something I'd been longing to do ever since we first met. She jerked back slightly, probably because of the coldness, but eventually relaxed, and the shock disappeared from her face. Her hand felt wonderfully warm against mine and the sparks of tension shooting between us was making it extremely hard for me to focus.
This was getting deep.
Bella's POV
I was half aware of the other people in the room staring at us, but I didn't care. His hand felt amazing against mine, despite the shivers it made pass through my body, and his presence was melting away my troubles. I felt better already.
"If..." he hesitated. "If you need any help, I'm always here," he said sincerely, with blazing, compassionate eyes. "I know it's difficult, but you'll cope. I have five adopted children, I should know."
He said the words with such confidence that, for a moment, I truly believed in myself. But then, the real trouble came bubbling through and I sat back, his hand falling away from mine. He sat back too, mirroring my actions. I stole a glance at his face; he seemed to be hiding something from me and I immediately wanted to know what.
I glanced quickly at the clock and frowned; we'd spent nearly an hour talking there. The time had flown by so quickly; when I talked to Dr Cullen it was like we were in our own personal bubble and I didn't want it to be penetrated.
"Ah, we'd better get back to work," I sighed, reluctantly standing up. I swayed slightly on the spot as the blood rushed to my head. With lightning speed, he was by my side, his arms on my shoulders steadying me. My heart thudded uncontrollably at his touch, a reaction he always seemed to cause.
"Are you alright?" he asked hastily, his grip tight and protective.
"Yeah, sorry," I stammered. "I just tood up too quickly." I laughed weakly and he let go of me, to my dismay. There was an awkward pause.
"Well thank you for the coffee, Dr Cullen," I smiled, heading slowly towards the door with him. People were still staring and I wanted to flick a rude hand gesture towards them.
"It was no problem," he smiled beautifully. "And please, call me Carlisle."
I didn't know why I was secretly thrilled as he said these words, but it was hard to control the smile on my face. The way his name rolled off his tongue was something quite special and I wanted to say it out loud myself.
Instead of doing this, we walked out into the corridor and stood still, ready to part ways.
"Well I hope your afternoon goes alright," I smiled hesitantly. He smiled slightly in response.
"Thank you." He paused, frowning slightly. "Please, Bella, take care of yourself."
His concerned words caught me by surprise and I stumbled mentally.
"Thank you, I'll try my best."
He smiled slightly again, the gesture not quite reaching his eyes, and then his face turned serious as he walked down the corridor, his white coat fanning behind him. I watched as he disappeared around the corner.
It surprised me how empty I felt as he moved out of my sight. I sighed and stepped towards my office, wondering if I was going to be graced with his presence again today.
It had certainly made me feel better. Momentarily.
Carlisle's POV
It was so hard just walking away from her; I wanted to stay by her side and comfort her for the rest of the day. But, I had to walk away as I didn't want to overstay my welcome. I'd probably end up scaring her again.
Although she did seem pretty comfortable with me around...
I sat down at my desk and found myself staring into space, my thoughts overtaking me once more.
I couldn't feel jealous; that was such an immature emotion to experience, yet I found myself wishing I could be in her partner's place. I knew it was impossible, in more ways than one, and this disturbed me slightly. It was also a very bold thing to be hoping for; we barely knew each other.
It shocked me how, not once during our conversation, had I thought of Esme. She was a huge part of my life for so long and now... now she didn't even claim one second of my thoughts. As I began some paperwork, I started to wonder where she was, considering we still hadn't heard from her, but then I thought back to Bella and what she was doing right now. She didn't seem pleased at all about her pregnancy; was it something to do with her partner? Or was she just not prepared, as she had said? It was definitely a worrying experience.
During the nine months, would she need any support, or would she not have time for me? The thought made me panic; not seeing Bella made me feel strangely nervous.
I sighed; all this worrying wasn't doing me any good, yet I was only concerned for Bella and needed to see her again. There was so much more I needed to ask her.
I impulsively retrieved my mobile and phoned home.
"Hello?" Alice's bright voice answered.
"Hi Alice, it's Carlisle," I replied. "I'm just ringing to say-"
"Have you heard anything from Esme?" she interupted, and I felt a wave of dismay.
"No," I replied. "Sorry."
There was a long silence and I heard her spreading the news to the others. I spoke. "Alice, I'm going to be late home tonight. Lots of... work has come up."
I felt bad lying, but couldn't tell her the truth just yet. That was even if my plans went according to plan.
"Oh, alright," her voice sounded disappointed.
"Try not to worry too much about Esme," I soothed. "She can take care of herself."
"But it's been a month without any news... and I can't see her anymore," she said quietly.
"I know. It'll get better."
She didn't reply, probably because she was unconvinced.
"I'll see you later, Alice."
"Okay. Bye, Carlisle."
I hung up and pondered for a moment. Then, I took in a deep breath and headed towards Bella's ward. I just hoped she was going to say yes after going to all this trouble.
Bella's POV
I had to tell Mark. It was the only way to remove some of my worry. He had a right to know, anyway. He was the father of my child; he would want to know.
Well, at least I thought he would.
However he reacted would be fine, though. I'd just have to deal with it.
I nodded to myself and began to walk towards the door. I opened it and began to head out, when I suddenly bumped into Carlisle who was standing facing me in the doorway. A small gasp of shock escaped my lips as he steadied me.
"Oops," I gasped when he removed his hands from my shoulders. He smiled apologetically.
"I'm sorry for startling you," he frowned. "It must have seemed quite strange to see me loitering around your office." He winced after saying that, but added, "I just wanted to ask you something."
I nodded, feeling extremely expectant. It was a mere ten minutes since we'd last spoken, yet his words still relieved me greatly. We'd wasted too much time to get to know each other; we might as well make up for it.
As friends, of course.
"Well, I was wondering if you'd like to join me for dinner." I felt my eyes bulge in shock and he hastily added, "I just feel we have a lot to talk about, considering we haven't been in contact for a month." He looked worried then, as though he'd said something wrong.
I slowly thought it through; it sounded like an amazing idea, but I didn't know if I had the courage to say yes.
Although... Mark was out overnight, and he wasn't expecting me home...
I had nothing to lose.
As a result, I smiled. "Yes. Yes, I'd love to, thank you."
His answering smile was glorious and he stepped beside me. "Right. That's great. Uh, shall I meet you here at six?"
I couldn't believe this was happening, but nodding enthusiastically. "Yes, that sounds great," I beamed. "Thank you."
He chuckled. "No problem, I shall look forward to it."
Carlisle's POV
I was more than just 'looking forward' to having dinner with Bella. I was longing for it.
As I hesitantly looked at her, waiting for one of us to speak, I laughed nervously.
"Have a good day, then," I said, gesturing towards the corridor.
"Thank you," she smiled timidly. "And yourself."
Walking away was even tougher this time and I knew I had an unbearable wait on my hands.
The hours crawled by incredibly slowly, so much so that I couldn't even begin to concentrate on my patients, something which was completely out of character. Several times I had to ask for them to repeat what they were saying because my thoughts were so far away. It must have been irritating and worrying for them, and I apologised sincerely.
I was excited, yet anxious at the same time. I wasn't entirely sure what to say to Bella, but it seemed that, whenever I was in her presence, the words flowed out of me easily, like we had known each other all our lives. In my case, that would be centuries.
I didn't think much about the fact that I wasn't human when spending a lot of time with Bella. She was so fragile and I felt the uncontrollable need to protect her and to be in her company.
My thoughts were torturing me, yet I watched as the clock gradually ticked towards the end of our shifts.
At 6pm, I nearly ran towards Bella's ward with an uncontrollable need to see her, yet I managed to slow myself to a normal pace as I walked down the corridor. To my surprise, she was waiting outside and, when she glanced in my direction, a stunning smile spread across her face. She was making it even more difficult for me to even think about staying away from her. I knew I was in too deep now, my feelings towards her were escalating out of my control everyday.
"Hey," she said simply.
"Hello," I replied, reaching for her coat which was hung on the wall. I helped her place her arms into the sleeves and her beautiful scent shocked me as her hair swept around. How did she make it so smooth?
"Ready to go?" I asked, heading towards the door with enthusiasm.
"Yes," she smiled and I noticed with relief that she was a lot happier now. Could it possibly be something to do with me? I could only hope so.
I led her to my car and watched her carefully as she studied it.
"Wow, this is amazing," she said in approval, running her hands along the bonnet. I tried to hold back the wave of desire which passed through me as I watched her delicately stroking it.
"Thank you," I replied quietly, opening the door for her. She sat down carefully and I swiftly joined her behind the wheel. I watched as she made herself comfortable and placed on her seatbelt. Every single thing she did, no matter how small, had me staring at her uncontrollably.
She glanced over at me and smiled encouragingly as I started the engine.
"This car is so much quieter than mine," she commented, causing me to raise an eyebrow. "Every morning I practically wake all our neighbours up with my roaring engine. It's like a beast."
I smirked in amusement and drove out the parking lot. "It runs well though, doesn't it? That's the main thing."
"Yeah," she pondered. "I'm trying to save up for a new one, though."
I found myself immediately wanting to know more. "Good luck with that," I smiled. "The salary's reasonable at the hospital, you'll have a new car in no time."
I saw her looking at me from the corner of her eye; she was frowning.
"Yeah," she said, her voice strangely worried. "Though I need to be saving for this little one now." She patted her stomach and I felt a twinge of pain. I'd temporarily forgotten about her child.
"Are you sure you're-?" I didn't finish.
She nodded. "Pretty sure, although I'm gonna go for a scan in a few weeks."
I heard her sigh and stared straight ahead, heading towards the restaurant as more jealousy ate away at my insides. I tried not to dwell on that, though, because I had an evening ahead with Bella and that was most certainly something positive.