Over and Over

"You alone?"

Nnoitra could only stare, his mouth open and his normally sure and cocky composure totally shot. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. Shinji was there, all dressed up and standing right in front of him, looking up with that sexy challenging gaze of his. The rod hit the floor with a dull 'thunk' and he cleared his throat.

"Y-yeah." He stumbled over the word, his eye trying to take in every bit of the thin blond from his tight black coat and his equally tight black pants. A small chain hung from one hip, looping back to his back pocket and was studded along the way with various sized disco ball charms; five in total. The pants themselves were covered randomly in different colored zippers and the shoes he wore where a shocking, vibrant pink. Nnoitra couldn't say he understood the style but it didn't mean that he thought it looked bad. Then again, not much looked bad on the blond. The whole thing made him curious to see what was under the jacket.

"So ya gonna make me stand out here like an idiot er what?" Shinji snapped, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms over his chest.

Nnoitra stiffened and sneered. "The fuck ya doin' here? I thought ya hated me?"

"Just let me in asshole."

Nnoitra stepped back, sweeping one arm to the side and Shinji took two shaky steps inside the small apartment. He couldn't believe he was there in the first place. After his little talk about closure sex with Szayel the pink haired man had pulled up to the dingy apartment complex and grinned saying that this was as far as he was going to take him. Shinji had of course protested, remembering the place as Nnoitra's home, but Szayel hadn't budged and finally, in his anger, Shinji had jumped out of the car and shouted that he was going to walk home then. The moment the car door had shut he knew he had made a mistake. Actually the mistake had been in calling the man in the first place. Szayel had rolled down the window and sent him a wide and almost lunatic grin.

"Have fun!" He called out before driving calmly away.

Shinji had stood on the sidewalk for a while, staring in the direction Szayel had driven off. He shouldn't have been surprised at what the man had done but it didn't make him any less pissed off about it. So it was a decision between walking up steps that seemed a mile long to talk to a man he was pretty sure he wasn't ready to face, or call a cab. When he remembered that he had purposefully left all but a two thousand yen note at home he groaned. It would cost a fortune to get a cab home and he had spent what little cash he had already on the booze. Now he had no choice but to go upstairs. He could walk but… no, walking was out of the question. It was cold and would probably start raining any moment.

Now that he was inside all he wanted to do was get away. Walking in the rain suddenly sounded like a wonderful idea. So what if he caught a cold and ended up with pneumonia? Nnoitra's place was too small and having the tall man standing next to him made it feel even smaller. He wrapped his arms around his waist unconsciously and shifted his weight on his feet to his right side. He nearly jumped when the door was shut behind him and three locks slid into place.

"Why'd ya lock it?" He asked, hoping Nnoitra couldn't detect the slight panic in his voice.

"You seen my neighborhood." He explained with an unconcerned shrug.

They stood in awkward silence for a moment, Nnoitra trying to figure out if he should say anything or just attack. Attacking hadn't turned out so well the last time though and he really didn't want to make Shinji cry again. He really hated it when people cried but when Shinji had cried strange things happened to him and it pissed him off. His insides had gone all gooey and his heart had fluttered in his chest. Like a fucking woman. He ran a hand back through his hair and snorted.

"The fuck you doin' here?" He asked again.

"Stranded." Shinji answered tersely, vowing to kill Szayel the next chance he got.

"The fuck you doin' all the way over here?"

Sighing, Shinji let his arms drop and he looked around the apartment… if it could even be called that. His lip curled without him realizing it. This place was ten times worse than his old apartment. The puke green paint on the walls was peeling in several places and there were multiple stains on the tatami mats beneath his feet. He was almost afraid to take his shoes off, customs be damned. The window was so close he would have been able to see outside in four steps; maybe three depending on his stride. The place was surprisingly clean though, the grey sheet covering the couch tucked in at all the right places, the tiny kitchen spotless and free of clutter and debris. He remembered back to when Nnoitra had been basically living with him and how much he had hated to clean up after himself then.

"I… don't have any way to get home right now." He said, making his voice louder than it needed to be with how close they were standing to hide the tremors.

"Can't ya call yer mommy?" Nnoitra asked with a sneer.

"No, she's in Osaka this weekend for a show." Shinji said offhandedly. "Ya don't even have a bathroom."

"Ya came here at use my toilet?"

"God, will you just shut up?"

"Tch." Nnoitra sneered and leaned a shoulder against the wall next to the door. "So ya thought ya'd come askin' me fer help?"

Shinji glared at him. "It's the least ya can for me after all I've done for ya."

Nnoitra's eye looked him up and down before a small smirk tilted his lips. "I ain't given ya my bed."

"I didn't ask for it."

He pushed away from the wall. "Have a seat, I ain't tired yet so I ain't turnin' out the lights." He walked to the mini fridge and opened it again. "You thirsty 're anythin'?"

"Got any beer?"

He shook his head. "I got this shitty wine Grimm gave me for some stupid reason." He grabbed the bottle off the counter and glared at it. Grimmjow knew Nnoitra hated wine.

"Whatever."

Shinji sighed and walked stiffly to the couch, sitting down but not getting too comfortable. This whole scenario felt strange and forced. He could tell Nnoitra was holding back and he knew that he was doing everything in his own power not to flee like a coward. When a fat plastic cup was shoved in his face he frowned at it before reaching out and taking it, peering over the rim to see what was inside.

"Well, isn't this classy? Drinkin' wine from a plastic cup."

"So sorry for not havin' the right glassware to appease yer fine taste, bitch."

Shinji snorted and rolled his eyes before gulping the liquid down. As far as he was concerned Nnoitra could have handed him the bottle. Nnoitra sat heavily on the couch, a single cushion between them, stretching his legs out in front of him as he eyed the blond surreptitiously. A part of him was mildly impressed he had kept his hands to himself for so long but it was clear even to him that his control was slipping. And why was he controlling himself in the first place? Well that was simple, he wanted to see what the blond was up to. It didn't make sense that he was in this part of town, let alone that he was "stranded" as he said he was. He watched Shinji's throat work as he swallowed the wine and gave a sympathetic response. He pictured a thin stream of red wine dripping down his chin and sliding down the side of his neck. He wouldn't have stopped himself from licking it up in an instant.

Shinji cleared his throat and looked down into the cup once more. "Can I have s'more?"

Grinning, Nnoitra got up off the couch and handed him the bottle. Knowing Shinji he'd be plastered in no time. Shinji unscrewed the cap and took a pull straight from the bottle.

"Now that's fuckin' classy."

Wiping his chin Shinji glared at him. "Fuck you."

"Keep drinkin'." He countered under his breath.

The silence was punctuated with the soft glugging sound of the bottle tipping and the tangy liquid streaming in between Shinji's lips. He could feel himself starting to feel a bit warm, a bit fuzzy around the edges and he almost smiled to himself. He liked that feeling right before he got too drunk. A few more sips and he'd be over the edge. He capped the cheap wine and set the bottle on the floor, looking over at the TV with feigned interest. It was amazing what a little alcohol could do to a person, he thought fleetingly. He felt… comfortable now, the heavy weight of anxiety lifted from his shoulders and stomach. It was nice just being able to sit there next to Nnoitra again and not fight; not even want to fight. Of course there was a tiny voice in his head telling him that things could get dangerous if he let his guard down, but he told it to shut up. He hated that voice, always trying to butt in and spoil his good moods.

Nnoitra grabbed the remote and started flipping through channels, not really paying any attention to what shows he was passing up on. The waves of chaotic emotion were no longer radiating from Shinji and for a moment he just let himself relax. A part of him sighed in relief and just wanted to sit back and enjoy it. Unfortunately another part of him had other ideas.

"So…." He said at length, turning his head to the side to see Shinji better. "Wanna fuck?"

At first he thought Shinji hadn't heard him and then, to his intense surprise, the blond snorted and followed it up with a giggle. A long fingered hand reached up and covered his face and before long he was outright laughing, leaning forward and holding his stomach with his other arm. Nnoitra's lips twitched in a half amused sneer as he shifted his body to the side.

"The fuck's so funny?"

"I'm sorry." Shinji said, trying to control himself and wiping at a tear that had formed in the corner of his eye. "Just… kinda déjà vu, ya know?"

"Ya gave in last time." Nnoitra pointed out and Shinji nodded, a small smile still on his face.

"Yeah but that was then and this is now." He said almost sadly.

He took a deep breath and turned his upper body towards Nnoitra, cocking his arm and placing his elbow on the back of the couch. His vision wasn't swimming yet so he knew he was at least in control of most of himself. He had so many questions he wanted to ask this man, so many things he wanted to do to him, not all of them violent in nature. He took another deep breath and frowned.

"Do ya have a pillow I can use?" He couldn't seem to get the right questions to come out.

"Only got one." Nnoitra said with a grin. "Guess we gotta share."

"Tch, fat chance."

"So what? All I had ta do ta getcha ta loosen up a bit was give ya booze?" Nnoitra asked suddenly.

Shinji shrugged. "I just don't feel like arguin' right now. Simple's that."

"Good, so let's fuck."

Shinji sighed. "Not that drunk." He said under his breath and Nnoitra snorted.

"Ya never had to be drunk fer it b'fore."

"I never hated ya this much before." Shinji replied matter-of-factly.

"Ya know," Nnoitra started, turning off the TV and facing the blond. "I had shit ta do alright? Took a little longer than it needed to, but so what?"

"Ya could have called me. Or left a fuckin' note that'cha were leavin'." So much for not being in the mood to argue.

"Yeah, well I didn't ever do that before."

"And it pissed me off every time ya did it!" Shinji glared at him. "What the fuck was so important that ya had to leave like that?"

"I had a fuckin' job to do and it ain't none'a yer business."

"Well it's good to know yer job meant more to ya than I did!"

They stared each other down then, glaring and wanting to move but unable to.

"God yer such a little bitch sometimes. What the hell do ya want me to do? Cry and say I'm sorry? Fuck that shit. I'm back now so what…."

"I may be a bitch but I'm not stupid like you. Ya can't just come back here and expect everythin' to be the same. It's been two years. Over two years. Things have changed. I've changed. I'm not gonna just fall into yer lap… argh-ah!"

Nnoitra reached out and grabbed Shinji by his wrist, pulling him literally into his lap. "Just did."

"F-fuck you!"

"Shut up." Nnoitra gripped Shinji's wrist tighter and wrapped his other arm around Shinji's waist, pressing him close to him before bending his head down and sucking his bottom lip into his mouth.

Shinji tilted his head back when a pair of teeth bit down harshly on his lip and felt electricity shoot to his nipples and groin.

"Ya can't do this." He all but whispered.

"Oh yeah?"

"I'm drunk."

"Che. I'm not gonna be all gallant and say 'I ain't gonna fuck ya when yer like this.' I'll fuck ya now, I'll fuck ya good and hard and I'll fuckin' enjoy." He let go of Shinji's wrist and grabbed him by the back of the head. "And you will too."

Shinji shivered and shifted his body to get more comfortable. "Make me."

Grinning, Nnoitra pulled Shinji closer and covered his mouth with his, slanting his lips and opening them so that his tongue could tease in between Shinji's. Shinji groaned and reached both hands up to fist in the shirt at Nnoitra's shoulders as his mouth opened and his own tongue flicked against the invader. Nnoitra's hand slid down to cup Shinji's ass, his fingers caressing the cleft and Shinji arched his back as he initiated a deeper kiss. There was no backing down from it this time, no car horn to bring either one of them to their senses. No one was going to walk in and interrupt them. Shinji shifted again, pushing back against Nnoitra's hand and moving his leg so that he was straddling Nnoitra's hips. With legs spread Nnoitra had better access to what he wanted, his fingers now trailing further between Shinji's legs, gliding over his balls and up over his covered entrance.

"Ah, shit." Nnoitra almost sighed before licking the side of Shinji's neck.

Shinji shivered and let his head fall back, giving Nnoitra room to roam with his long tongue. That wicked, wicked tongue. Nnoitra's teeth nipped and bit everywhere they could, scraping and marking the delicate skin. Shinji moaned quietly and tugged at Nnoitra's shirt, bowing his back and pressing his hips forward. Nnoitra hissed and pushed Shinji off his lap, standing and turning to tear the cushions and sheet off the couch.

"Take those fuckin' clothes off." He growled as he pulled the bed out.

Shinji was already three steps ahead of him, the zipper on his coat coming undone with one hand while the other tackled his pants. The jacket fell to the floor and Shinji had to back out of the way as the bed was brought out. He licked his lips, pulling his bottom one between his teeth, and opened the front of his pants. Nnoitra ripped his shirt over his head and didn't give Shinji a chance to finish undressing; or change his mind. He picked him up bodily and tossed him on the bed, pouncing as soon as Shinji hit the mattress. Not bothering to take his time, Nnoitra dipped his head and bit Shinji's nipple through his shirt. Shinji's back arched off the bed and he pulled at Nnoitra's hair.

"Fuck, Nnoi." He breathed.

"Get this stupid thing off." Nnoitra husked.

"Ya didn't give me time, asshole."

Nnoitra snorted and lifted himself up on his elbows. "Take it off or I'll rip it off."

Shinji grumbled but his hands were trembling when he moved them to unbutton his pale gold dress shirt. He knew he shouldn't be doing this, knew that he shouldn't have even let the first kiss happen but too big a part of him didn't care. He had waited and wanted for so long to touch Nnoitra, to feel the muscles beneath his skin move as he crouched over him and sent him over the edge with his mouth, hands and vulgar words. He could kick himself about it later. For now this was what he wanted more than anything in the world.

Nnoitra grinned when Shinji's chest was finally revealed and bent to lick a line from Shinji's sternum, up his neck and over his chin before meeting him in a deep and possessive kiss. Thin hips pressed him into the mattress and a hard, thick cock was ground into his thigh. Shinji couldn't have stopped the deep, loud moan that came from him if he had wanted to. Oh, God that cock. Nnoitra fingers pulled blindly at Shinji's pants one of his fingernails catching and tearing the skin before he managed to pull one side down over a slim hip. He pulled away from Shinji's mouth and attacked his neck as he pulled at the other side of his pants.

"Too fuckin' tight." He growled and Shinji chuckled breathily.

He lifted his hips and pulled his pants down over his ass himself, looking up at Nnoitra with amusement and arousal in his eyes. "Better?"

Nnoitra only grinned and bit and kissed his way down Shinji's chest. His hands pulled the pants away from Shinji's body, leaving Shinji to kick out of them once they were at his feet. Nnoitra used one hand to unbutton himself and his own pants slid easily off, joining Shinji's in a heap on the floor. When naked flesh met Shinji hissed and dug his nails into Nnoitra's shoulders, arching his back and letting his eyes roll back. Nnoitra moaned and rocked his hips against Shinji, nudging open his legs with little difficulty. Shinji lifted one leg and hooked it over the back of Nnoitra's thigh, and he dragged his blunt nails down his back.

"Hurry." He all but whispered and Nnoitra let out another low groan.

Bypassing the barely planned foreplay he reached up and pressed one of his long fingers to Shinji's lips, slightly shocked at the reaction his body had when that pink tongue flicked out and pulled his finger inside his mouth. He trembled and let his eye roll closed as Shinji's tongue curled around his finger, wetting it completely. Pulling his finger out he reached down between Shinji's legs and probed for his opening, the tip pressing inside slowly. Shinji sucked in a breath and bit his lip.

"What?"

"Been a while."

Nnoitra grinned. "Yeah?"

"Shut up."

Nnoitra chuckled and pressed his finger slowly inside, the constant pressure causing Shinji to arch his back and moan wantonly. The last time he had had sex was the last video he had done for Szayel and that had been almost eight months ago. Sure he had masturbated but it was always different when it was someone else touching you. When that long finger curled and pressed against his prostate his entire body jerked and he let out a gasp.

"Oh fuck!"

Nnoitra chuckled breathily and sank his teeth into Shinji's collar bone. "That's right." He purred.

He had to stop soon, he realized, to look for the lube. He knew it was near the couch but with the bed out he wouldn't be able to just reach out and find it. And as much as he wanted to take his time in things, Shinji was already panting and writhing beneath him and if he didn't fuck him soon he was going to blow. He pulled his finger out and sat back on his heels, waiting for Shinji to look up at him. When he did he frowned and lifted himself up on his elbows.

"What?"

"Touch yerself while I get the lube." Nnoitra commanded in a deep voice and to his intense delight Shinji barely hesitated before wrapping his pale hand around himself and stroking gently.

Shinji couldn't help but stare as Nnoitra moved, his cock twitching at the sight and the attention it was receiving. He was a bit thinner than he had been but for some reason it didn't make him any less attractive. The cuts were still livid against his skin and he seemed to have a few more scars to add to the older ones. When Nnoitra turned Shinji felt a small smirk tilt his lips when he noticed the tattoo on his right butt cheek. He had gotten the lotus flower when he was fifteen, drunk and egged on by both Grimmjow and Szayel. He hated the thing but had never had anything done about it. When Nnoitra turned again Shinji though he noticed something on his lower abdomen but before he could see what it was Nnoitra was back over the top of him, leaning down to lick at his neck. Shinji's head tipped back again and his hand slowed to a stop.

Nnoitra grabbed Shinji under the knees and pulled, sending the blond crashing back down to the bed. Without warning, other than a wide grin, he pressed two long and slick fingers inside him. Shinji bucked his hips and closed his eyes, his breath hitching in his throat.

"Shit yer already loosenin' up. I could prob'ly fit…," Nnoitra slipped a third finger easily in beside the two already slowly fucking Shinji and licked his lips. "Ah fuck."

"Shit." Shinji panted. "Just fuckin' do it already."

"Bossy bitch." Not that it bothered to him in the least at the moment. He pulled his hand away once more and slicked the remaining lube over his own cock, hissing at the sensation it caused.

Taking a firm hold of himself he positioned his cock at Shinji's entrance and pressed, shuddering at the resistance. Shinji went stiff before nearly launching off the bed and up into Nnoitra's arms, sitting down harshly on the fat cock penetrating him and wrapping his legs around his waist. Nnoitra's arms wrapped around him, holding him still as he shook.

"Oh fuck. Oh God. Oh Shit. Oh yes." Shinji panted in a litany of curses and pleas.

Shinji tilted his head up and kissed Nnoitra's neck, his tongue and teeth touching every part they could reach. When he lifted himself he cried out softly before latching on to Nnoitra's mouth with his. Nnoitra's hands cupped Shinji's ass and helped him move, his brain frying with every twitch in Shinji's body. It was so tight and so good. One hand shifted and caught hold of Shinji's hair, yanking backwards and causing the smaller man to cry out. Nnoitra sneered and looked down at him, licking his neck once before yanking again on his hair. Shinji's fingers linked behind Nnoitra's neck and he rocked his hips as he rose and fell. Nnoitra groaned and pulled his hair again.

Shinji was in heaven, the stretch, the burn, the fullness, all of it making his mind reel and his body heat. It was too much; it was not enough. And the only word that kept running through his brain was: More. He wanted so much more. He trailed fire tipped kissed to Nnoitra's ear, his breath gasping out as his body was jostled as he fucked himself. His tongue flicked out and pulled Nnoitra's ear lobe closer, between his teeth.

"Fuck me." He breathed into his ear and he felt Nnoitra' shudder.

"Thought I was doin' that." Nnoitra grit out.

Shinji slammed himself back down and rolled his hips, moaning when his prostate was pressed harshly against.

"Harder. Like ya used to." He whispered and grinned at Nnoitra's answering groan.

Suddenly finding himself spinning and his face pressing into the mattress he couldn't stop the smile as he bent his knees and arched his back, his ass almost waving in the air in anticipation. Nnoitra brushed Shinji's hair off his back and out of his way as he plunged back inside him, another deep throated groan tearing from him. He grabbed Shinji's elbows and pulled them back so that they were touching, sneering grin stretching his lips when Shinji moaned and bucked back against him. That was it. The end of whatever control he had miraculously held on to up until that point. With a sharp snap of his hips he let go completely and fucked Shinji as hard and as long as he could, the blond's moans and screams making him want to pound harder, grip tighter, pull back even more on his arms. He needed more arms. He wanted to fist Shinji's hair and shove fingers in his mouth. Wanted to do everything he knew the blond loved all at once. He was doing that thing again with his ass, contracting and relaxing the muscles and when finally they clamped down around him tightly and he heard the guttural scream come from Shinji as he came, Nnoitra's body stiffened and he pushed inside Shinji as far as he could go before cumming as hard as he had in as long as he could remember.

They collapsed, Nnoitra barely managing to roll at the last minute to avoid crushing the smaller man, and lay panting on the bed. Shinji shuddered once before rolling and curling into Nnoitra's body, his face rubbing against his shoulder. Nnoitra smiled warily and slung an almost limp arm around his shoulder, kissing the top of his head before letting exhaustion take him.

Shinji woke first, not really understanding why he was so hot or even where he was. He shifted slightly and opened his eyes to a large expanse of chest and the night came flooding back to him. He was mildly surprised when the shame didn't come to tear at his soul and even more surprised when he smiled into the chest, snuggling closer. It was still dark out, he couldn't have been asleep very long, and he wondered if he should just go back to sleep. Nnoitra shivered and mumbled something before rolling on his back and reaching out blindly with an arm. Shinji bit his lip and watched him flail for a moment before sitting up and looking down at him.

"The fuck ya doin'?"

Nnoitra's eye popped open and looked over at him, going wide before he too sat up.

"Holy shit." He said before seemingly catching himself and grinning. "Lookin' fer the blanket."

Shinji sighed. "The fuck's the bathroom?" He asked with a yawn.

"Down the hall on the right." He watched Shinji get off the bed and slip back into his pants before pulling his shoes on and stepping out in to the hallway.

He had really thought that had been the best wet dream ever. He hadn't thought that Shinji would give in so quickly but was delighted with the outcome. Maybe the stupid bitch would let everything go back to how it was before, now. Shinji wasn't gone long and was shivering like crazy when he came back. He warmed his hands under hot tap water as Nnoitra sat up in bed and turned the TV back on. He wasn't tired anymore and was beginning to wonder if he could talk Shinji into round two. Shinji turned and looked at him as he dried his hands on his pants.

"Mind if I have more of that shitty wine?" He asked and Nnoitra shrugged.

Shinji downed all but a third of the bottle before crawling back into bed and under the surprisingly thick, warm covers. Curling into Nnoitra once more he closed his eyes and passed out for a second time that evening.

He woke later to a pounding headache and stiff, sore muscles. He hurt everywhere it seemed and he was afraid to even blink. With a quiet sigh he squinted his eyes opened and nearly groaned at what he saw. Nnoitra was in bed next to him, naked and warm. He had done it after all. The shame he had been expecting the last time he woke up with him like a ton of bricks now that his mind was sober and all he wanted at that point was to get out of there as quickly as his hangover would let him. He sat up slowly, both trying not to wake Nnoitra and keep his head on his shoulders, and began pulling his cloths back on as quietly as he could. He was almost at the door when a gruff voice stopped him in his tracks.

"The fuck you goin'?"

Shinji cleared his throat but didn't turn back to look at the man still in bed. "I got things ta do taday." He said quietly.

Nnoitra snorted. "Yer bailin'."

Shinji stiffened and turned. "Am not."

"Liar."

He sighed. "Look, just 'cos last night happened doesn't mean anythin's changed. Sorry if ya thought too much into it."

Nnoitra shook his head and sat up in bed. "Now who's callous?"

Shinji frowned and clutched his jacket closer to him. "Sex doesn't make it all better, Nnoi."

He didn't let himself say anything else, didn't hear Nnoitra if he said anything as he left. He just shut the door and practically fled down the hallway. Once outside he spotted a familiar car and his shoulders slumped a bit. When a pink head stuck out of the window and smiled cheerily at him he wasn't sure if he wanted to hit him or just go home. To much was going on inside his head to think straight at the moment and it was making his hangover even worse. He stepped to the passenger side of the car and let himself in, leaning back into the leather seat and closing his eyes.

"So, did you enjoy yourself last night?" Szayel asked with a knowing smile.

"I'll kill you later. Right now just please take me back to my car."

Szayel chuckled and pulled away from the curb. "Whatever you say, Shin-chan."

A/N Don't look at me like that. Sex really doesn't make anything better. I know you all wanted a happy sappy conclusion for this chapter but ya ain't gonna get that yet. Too many emotions and stuff floating around for these two. BUT! We are getting VERY close to finding out some VERY juicy information; namely what exactly happened between these two two years ago. And a bit more conflict over the events in China. :D Sorry it took so long to get this out and I really hope you all enjoyed it. Also, I know that some of you couldn't get the link to work that i posted in the last chapter. The song I'm dedicating to both Shinji and Nnoitra as well as directly to this chapter is called Over and Over by Three Days Grace. Great song and very fitting. Anywho, I'll stop my ramblings now. :D Next chapter hopefully will be out soon! Love you Duckies!

~Penny