First Day of Fatherhood

Shinji stood back in front of the dirty peeling door, fifteen minutes early but too excited to stay away any longer. He had called Yumi to let him know that he wasn't going to be in the office until late, if at all today, but to call him if he needed anything. When Yumi asked the reason, Shinji had just giggled and said he had a date with a beautiful girl before hanging up on the man. He was sure he'd be receiving all kinds of questions for that one but he couldn't help himself. He raised his fist and knocked quietly, surprised when the door was pulled open before he had even started and a wide eyed Nana was looking up at him. She frowned and looked to the side before speaking.

"I… I need your help." she said quietly and Shinji nodded.

"Sure, what's up?"

Nana grabbed his wrist and pulled him inside, shutting and locking the door behind them. She looked nervously at the small crib where Yayoi was sleeping and tugged at the hem of the school appointed skirt she was wearing.

"There's this creepy old guy next door who keeps following me and Yayoi around…." she started and Shinji's smile faded some.

"Ya wanna ride ta school then?" he offered, not thinking twice about it and even reaching inside his pocket for his keys.

Nana sighed. "She doesn't have a carseat. Can… can you just walk with me to the bus stop and stay until it comes? I mean… if it's not too much…."

"'course I can! You get ready and I'll bundle Yo-chan up, ne?"

Nana gave him a strange look at the nickname he had given his daughter but sighed and started to gather her things. She hoped that Shinji would be able to find enough to wrap Yayoi up with because she was pretty limited with what she could afford for her little girl. Most of what she had, had been given to her by neighbors and a nice little charity workshop she had attended during her pregnancy. All her money now went to diapers and wipes and whatever else for rent, bills and if she was lucky, food. She watched Shinji out of the corner of her eyes, noting that he did in fact seem to know what he was doing. He was so gentle and even whispered quietly to Yayoi as he wrapped every available blanket around her tiny little body. Nana was worried about leaving her child for the first time but at least she felt like she could trust him. True, she barely knew anything about him but… she still felt she could trust him with her daughter. Their daughter.

Shinji frowned at the lack of clothing and made up his mind what he was going to do that day. He couldn't have his daughter without things she needed after all. But first things first he would need to get her a carseat. The tiny cogs in his brain began to turn as he picked Yayoi up and pulled the blankets he had wrapped around her tighter, tugging on the little cap she was wearing so that it covered her forehead and ears. God she was so adorable, he thought as he looked down at her and smiled. He was sure that Yayoi was the cutest baby he had ever seen.

"Okay, I'm ready." Nana said, breaking him from his thoughts.

"Oh, sure." he said, pressing Yayoi close to his body. "So, ya don't mind if I take her out and get some shit right?"

Nana shifted her weight and looked back over her shoulder as she opened the door, her gaze calculating for a moment before she shook her head.

"I only have one house key." she said, stepping out into the hallway.

"Oh, well… I could always take her back ta my place after shoppin'. Ya know, if ya don't mind. I c'n give ya the address and stuff if that'll make ya more comfortable." Shinji realized he was rushing things a little but he couldn't help it. He was excited.

Nana sighed and began walking down the hall after she shut the door and Shinji gave her back a small smile.

"Just… I'll call you when I get out of school and you can meet me here okay?"

Shinji snorted. "Or I could just pick ya up." he muttered but Nana seemed to be ignoring him. Apparently she didn't care for too much help. He hoped she wouldn't be upset when she saw what he was planning on buying today.

Nana gave Yayoi a small kiss on the head before getting on the bus and Shinji practically ran back to the apartment to get his baby girl warmed up. Yayoi was fussing a bit but wasn't to a stage that he was worrying about it. He'd been around enough babies to know that it was just her trying to get comfortable. Now he just had to figure out how he was going to get her somewhere to buy a carseat so that he could take her in the car to do other sorts of shopping. He didn't want to take Yayoi on the bus, too many people and too many germs. He couldn't take a cab, no carseat, so he was left with very little options. Call someone who had a kid or… his mother. Shinji sighed, he had wanted to spend the first day alone with Yayoi and if he called his mother he could be sure that she wouldn't just leave him alone, not after finding out that she was a grandmother. That was pretty much something she had given up on when he was nine. He'd have to spill all the details to her about what had happened and that would take forever. He wanted to be selfish today. Shinji bit his lip and pulled out his phone, calling the only person in the world who knew anything about this new development in his life.

"Yeah." Ichigo answered distractedly and Shinji could hear Sorin screaming in the background.

"Hey, ya leavin' fer work soon?" Shinji asked, smiling down at Yayoi who gurgled and made a face like she was passing stool.

"Huh, yeah why?"

"I need ta ask ya a favor."

Shinji heard Ichigo sigh and something crash in the background. "Jesus… damn it Grimm let the damn cats outside already!"

"No way! They'll run off or get hit by a car!" Grimmjow shouted back and Sorin raised his voice.

Shinji tried to cover the snort but was unsuccessful. Grimmjow babied the cats almost as bad as his kids.

"What do you need, Shin? I'm running late as it is." Ichigo asked in an irritated voice and Shinji could see the man's deep scowl in his mind's eye.

"Oh, just wonderin' if I could borrow a carseat with baby paddin' for a bit."

The line was silent a moment before Shinji heard a door shut and Ichigo's quick and whispering voice.

"What do you mean?"

Shinji couldn't keep the smile out of his voice as he answered. "I'm watchin' my kid taday."

"Holy…," Ichigo let out a quiet laugh. "So you did do the right thing after all."

"Fuck you I did. Ya knew I was gonna. Anyway, she don't have one and I wanna do some shoppin' so… I need ta borrow one'a yers."

"I get to be the first one to meet 'em?" Ichigo asked excitedly and Shinji laughed, glad that he could share this with Ichigo first. He was, after all, the first to know about his kids.

"Yeah, so bring me that shit so ya can get ta work, baka."

Shinji texted Ichigo the address and waited, readying a diaper bag to fill the time before Ichigo showed up. He noticed that while Nana was breast feeding, she was also giving Yayoi formula and wondered if he should talk to her about that. In his mind it should be one or the other, not both. He'd prefer his kid to have Mother's Milk, but sometimes that wasn't really possible, especially with Nana going to school and working. Shinji heated some water and prepared to fill two glass nursing bottles and made a mental note to pick up more while he was out. One could never have too many bottles, he thought.

It barely took twenty minutes before there was a quiet knock at the door and he opened it to a widely grinning Ichigo. Shinji let Ichigo in, noting that his eyes went directly to the small crib and the tiny bundle there, sleeping soundly once again.

"So… am I the only one besides Szayel that knows yet?" Ichigo asked and Shinji nodded, grinning.

"I'm tellin' Nnoi tanight." Shinji took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. "Wanna see her?"

"Her? Of course I want to see her!"

Shinji chuckled and bent to unwrap Yayoi from her cocoon of blankets and lifted her, pulling the little cap off her head before displaying her to Ichigo like the proud father he was. Ichigo's eyes widened and his fingers itched to reach out and hold the tiny baby, remembering when the triplets had been that small and suddenly missing that time. Sure he wanted them to grow up faster, but he'd always miss when they were this tiny.

"Gorgeous like her papa ain't she?" Shinji beamed.

Ichigo just smiled and shook his head, reaching out to run a gentle hand over soft black hair. She looked so much smaller than the triplets had been when they were born. So much more fragile.

"Damn, Shin. I never thought I'd see you with a kid of your own." Ichigo whispered, still awing over Yayoi. "What's her name?"

"Yayoi…." Shinji paused, frowning a bit before continuing. "Yayoi Hirako." It felt so strange saying that but at the same time it made his chest swell with a mixture of pride and fear.

Ichigo chuckled and sighed before looking at his watch. "I really do have to go." he said, taking a reluctant step backwards. "Carseat is next to the door. Grimmjow's all kinds of pissed off I took off with it and didn't explain myself." Shinji snorted and Yayoi began to fuss quietly.

"Thanks Ichi."

Ichigo looked up at Shinji and smiled warmly. "No prob, daddy."

Shinji paced his living room, periodically stopping to check the clock on the stove to find that only a minute had passed from the last time he had checked. He had had such a wonderful day with Yayoi, shopping, feedings, even the changing dirty diapers had made him happy. He had gotten her way too many outfits, splurged on a nice crib he had no idea where he was going to put and a stroller that had more buttons than his car did, and stocked up on five different sizes of diapers. From what he remembered about babies they grew fast and didn't stay in one diaper size, let alone clothing size, for long. He had worried over the fact that Yayoi was so quiet a baby, fussed over her cute faces that accompanied various bodily functions, and rocked her to sleep humming the lullaby his mother used to sing for him. It had been one of the best days of his life and he couldn't wait to do it again.

Nana had looked anxious when he had dropped Yayoi off with her along with various supplies. He was sure she was about to protest but she had held her tongue and offered him tea while he found places to stash the stuff he had decided Yayoi needed close to her. The rest of it was sitting in his living room and he paused again in his pacing to muse at just how overboard he had gone. It was a good thing he owned a rather lucrative business or he'd be seriously hurting for money right then. So if Shinji had had such a wonderful day, why was he so nervous?

Nnoitra was on his way over.

Shinji glanced back at the clock and sighed before nearly jumping out of his skin when the front door opened and an exhausted looking Nnoitra walked through it. Shinji took a deep breath and smiled at the man who grunted and started to make his way to the couch, stopping to frown at the pile of baby goods in the corner by the TV. Nnoitra's lip curled and he looked at Shinji, eyebrow raising enough to hide behind his dirty white bandana.

"The fuck is all that?" Nnoitra asked and Shinji took another deep breath.

"Baby stuff." he said, cocking a hip and rolling his eyes when his voice shook slightly. Shinji cleared his throat.

"No shit. Why's it here?"

"Nnoi, I gotta tell ya some things. Ya might wanna sit down fer this." Shinji started and Nnoitra's frown deepened. Nnoitra's spine straightened and long arms folded in front of him.

"No. Fuckin' spit it out."

Shinji sighed and looked at the floor. "W-well. Okay, so a while back I went ta this party, right? And I kinda… did some stupid things." This wasn't coming out at all like he had planned and rehearsed in his head all day long.

"Yeah, and?"

"Well… I was pretty fucked up on whatever Szayel had given…."

Nnoitra snorted. "I should'a known this had somethin' ta do with him."

Shinji frowned and continued. "Anyway, well it seems that I sort of…," Shinji closed his eyes and wished he didn't have to say anything. He was trying so damn hard not to keep anything to himself anymore, at least not the important stuff, and this was definitely important. However this was the first time since he had decided to be completely honest with Nnoitra that he was having to tell him something so big.

Shinji took another deep and hopefully steadying breath and said in a rush of words he hoped he wouldn't have to repeat, "…hadsexwithawoman."

Nnoitra's frown deepened and mixed with confusion as he tried to sort out what exactly the blond had just said. He recognized the word sex, but the rest could have been German for all he could understand. His lip curled up over his teeth and he shook his head.

"What?"

Shinji huffed out yet another sigh and bit his lip briefly before he tired again, this time much slower.

"I had sex with a woman."

"Ew."

Shinji's head snapped up at the immediate reply from Nnoitra and he would have laughed at the look of disgust that was so clear on the man's face had he not still been so nervous about the rest of his confession.

"Nnoi, that ain't the point'a all this…."

"Then why tell me? I don't wanna know 'bout everythin' ya fucked."

Anger rose at those words and Shinji found it easier to say the next bit. His back straightened and his chin rose just a little as he spoke.

"Anyway, I don't really remember it but Szayel was there too and from what I was told the three of us did it."

Nnoitra raised a hand out in front of him and closed his eye. "Look, as fuckin' fascinatin' as this story is, does it have a fuckin' point? I'm fuckin' tired and hearin' that faggot's name is pissin' me off."

"She got pregnant."

Nnoitra's eye widened almost comically and his arms dropped limply to his sides as he let the words process. And then, to Shinji's complete surprise, Nnoitra laughed.

"Ha! Serves that fucker right!" Nnoitra said, shaking his head and resuming his short walk to the couch. "Still don't see why yer tellin' me though."

"Nnoi, Szayel ain't the daddy." Shinji said quietly and bit the inside of his cheek when Nnoitra's entire body froze, half bent over the couch as he had been in the middle of sitting.

Slowly, Nnoitra's head turned, his violet eye even wider than before.

"The fuck does that mean?"

A small and extremely weak smile pulled at Shinji's lips and his head cocked to the side as he regarded the man he loved. This isn't hard, just keep goin'. Ya got this far.

"Well, Nnoi. What it means is that it's mine."

Nnoitra stood up so fast that Shinji took a step back so he could still look Nnoitra comfortably in the face. He watched so many emotions flit over the man's face that he couldn't even begin to discern them and closed his eyes against them, waiting for the blow up.

"Ya… no way." Shinji nodded. "But… how? How do ya know fer sure?"

Shinji didn't like the sound of Nnoitra's voice all breathy like this and he refused to look at him. He didn't want to know what kind of face he was making now.

"Yesterday mornin' we got results back from a DNA test. The doc said it was me not Szayel who's the daddy."

Nnoitra couldn't think, didn't know whether to be upset about the situation or laugh. He wasn't used to having to think things through anyway but he wasn't even able to figure out how to outwardly react to the information. All he could do was stand there, staring down at a bowed blond head and listen to the soft murmuring voice as Shinji continued to speak.

"Anyway, that's what I was doin' yesterday, the test results and then I had a bit of a freak out," Shinji laughed quietly; humorlessly. "But I decided that I can't back away from this. I need ta be a man and all that. So last night I went ta go meet her." Shinji shook his head and let a small smile grace his features.

"She's so pretty." he whispered and Nnoitra felt his heart rate pick up a bit.

"That stuff in the corner is fer her. I spent all day shoppin' with her taday. I…,"

Nnoitra's hand was over his mouth and he hadn't even remembered raising it. Shinji looked up finally and saw this, his brow furrowing. Long fingers stroked over Nnoitra's chin and lips, plucking the soft think skin there, and he shook his head again. This… this was too much. Nnoitra closed his eye and dropped his arm again, turning his body and slowly walking down the hallway.

"Nnoi?"

"I'mma…," Nnoitra had to clear his throat and sneered before speaking again. "I'mma go take a shit."

With that said, Nnoitra closed the bathroom door on a thoroughly confused Shinji and lowered himself to the closed toilet seat. Resting thin and bony elbows on his knees, Nnoitra opened the palms of his hands and lowered his head into them, shaking his head again as he tried to sort through the blizzard of emotions in his head.

Shinji stared at the bathroom door and belatedly realized that his mouth was hanging open. That hadn't been anywhere near the sort of reaction he had been expecting from Nnoitra and if he were being honest with himself it scared him even more. He almost preferred it when Nnoitra yelled and ranted at things to this… silence. He wasn't sure how long he stood there, not sure what he was waiting for, but his head snapped up when he heard the shower start. Not knowing what else to do with himself, Shinji walked back to the living room to wait for Nnoitra to finish, hoping that they could talk some more when he did.

Takashiro looked down at a spent Tesla and smiled. The boy was so stupid but so pretty and obedient that he didn't care. As long as he continued to do as he said, he'd never have to hit the little idiot again. Tesla stirred and hugged the pillow he was holding tighter to his chest. Takashiro pulled a cigarette from his pack and walked to the window, opening it before lighting up. Tesla would be quitting the host club soon and Takashiro would make sure that he got away from that interfering blond man. He hated the influence that man held over his Tesla and he wasn't going to put up with it very much longer. He was doing his best to be nice about all of it, but Tesla had upset him enough that he had had to put him in his place. He knew that the blond had tried to keep him from Tesla after that, knew that Tesla had tried to stand up and tell him no, but in the end Takashiro had won and Tesla had told him that he would put in a notice to quit at the end of the month. Takashiro had rewarded Tesla that night and allowed the young man to scream his name as loud as he wanted. His wife wasn't home after all and the both of them had been excited that Takashiro had not only brought Tesla to his home, but to the bed he shared with his wife.

Takashiro took a deep pull from his cigarette before stubbing it out in the ashtray he kept in the sill. He turned back to Tesla and smiled, fingering his beard a moment before walking back to the bed. Now all that was left was to get him out of that blond man's house so he could keep him tighter under his thumb.

Shinji sat stiffly on the couch staring at the blank TV screen as he waited for Nnoitra to come out of the bathroom. The shower had gone off a while ago but Nnoitra was still in there doing God knew what. Shinji had checked the clock some time ago and seen that it had been over an hour since Nnoitra had retreated to the sanctuary of the bathroom and he had no idea how long he had been waiting on the couch for him. Finally, the door clicked open and Shinji sat up straighter, looking over the back of the couch as Nnoitra slowly walked down the hallway. The tall man stopped and Shinji noticed that he had yet to put his bandana back on. He had even pulled his hair back into a loose pony tail at the back of his head. Nnoitra sniffed and refused to look at Shinji as he spoke.

"I think I'mma stay at Starrk's tanight." he started and Shinji's eyes widened.

"What?"

Nnoitra, not thinking, shoved his bandana in the pocket of his dirty jeans and shrugged.

"Just…."

Shinji leapt up off the couch and put his hands out in front of him.

"Ya can't leave!"

Nnoitra grunted. "Yeah I can." His voice was too quiet and Shinji was beginning to panic.

"Look I… I didn't exactly do this on purpose ya know!" When Nnoitra didn't say anything Shinji continued. "I… well I can't say now I'd take it back if I could but… damn it Nnoi, I…."

"Just get the fuck outta my way so I can leave." Nnoitra moved to skirt around Shinji and Shinji reacted in the only way he knew might work. Pressing his hands in the middle of Nnoitra's chest and pushing slightly Shinji looked up and him and said the first thing that came to mind.

"Please don't leave me."

Shinji watched Nnoitra's brow twitch and his upper lip curl as both eyes flickered between his own.

"Move." he said quietly but without heat.

Shinji shook his head and tightened is grip on Nnoitra's shirt. "I won't."

"Damn it…!"

"Please." Shinji's chin trembled and he realized he was on the verge of tears. He felt stupid for it but he couldn't stop them.

Nnoitra growled and stepped back, glaring down at Shinji.

"Ya can't do that!" he shouted suddenly, startling Shinji. "Ya can't fuckin' cry just ta getcher way. It ain't fuckin fair!"

"I'm not doin' it ta get my way asshole!" Shinji's voice croaked.

"The fuck ya aren't!"

"I wancha ta stay 'cuz if ya leave… how do I know yer gonna come back?" One tear finally slipped free and Nnoitra realized that out of all of the weapons Shinji held in his arsenal, tears were the worst and most deadly.

"Fuck." he groaned, letting his head fall back as he raised his hands to scrub over his face. "The fuck ya want me ta do, huh?"

Shinji sniffed and shrugged. "I dunno. Just stay." Shinji reached out for Nnoitra's hand and waited until the man dropped his head and looked at him again. "Just… don't be mad at me."

Nnoitra closed his eyes and took a deep breath, wondering when he had gotten this soft. He didn't like it, not one bit, but when he opened his eyes again and saw Shinji looking up at him just as another tear freed itself from long pale lashes he knew he wasn't going anywhere.

"God damn it." he said, raising a hand to wipe the tear off Shinji cheek. "Knock it the fuck off and I'll stay, alright?"

Shinji sniffed again and nodded, squeaking a little when Nnoitra reached out and pulled him into a rough hug. Shinji wrapped his arms around Nnoitra's chest and buried his face in his shirt.

"I'm sorry…."

"Shut the fuck up."

Shinji tried to pull away, knowing that hugging made Nnoitra uncomfortable, but found it hard to move with how tight a hold Nnoitra had on him. Shinji felt fingers creep up into his hair and sighed.

"Yer such a bitch, ya know that?" Nnoitra muttered and Shinji snorted.

"God ya know how to make me feel all gooey inside."

"Why's everyone havin' babies an' shit? Buncha fuckin' gay men havin' kids is just… weird." Nnoitra continued almost as if thinking out loud.

"Grimm and Ichi planned theirs." Shinji mumbled as he began to pull absently at Nnoitra's shirt. "Yer shirt smells."

Nnoitra snorted. "I fuckin' worked hard taday."

Shinji finally was able to pull back enough to look up at Nnoitra and smiled. "Take yer clothes off and I'll throw them in the wash while ya order us some dinner, ne?"

"Che. Tryin' ta butter me up with food and clean clothes." Nnoitra grinned as he pulled his shirt over his head. "Throw in a blow job and let me tie ya up tanight and I just might fergive ya fer knockin' some chick up."

Nnoitra was far from okay with the situation but figured that it really didn't have that much to do with him anyway. It wasn't like Shinji was leaving him and it wasn't like the brat was coming to live with Shinji. In his mind he figured he'd probably never even see the kid. Forcing himself to believe all the thoughts now running through his head, Nnoitra stripped and ordered food and prepared to have a nice evening with his boyfriend. Shinji still felt a bit of tension in the air between them but didn't say anything about it. He just tried to enjoy the fact that Nnoitra seemed to be handling it better than he thought he would and hoped the days to come didn't prove the both of them wrong.

A/N YAY! Finally. I had soooo many issues with Nnoi's reaction. There were too many ways it could go but finally I decided this was the right one. I hope you all liked it. And what was that I saws in there? Set up for plot perhaps? Do I see more drama on the horizon? Maybe~~ ;p Well, I don't know what else to say really. I'm going to try and update for Hollow next but I'm not making an promises on which will be first up. I have some ideas I need to get out of my head regarding this story that I really hope you will all enjoy so maybe I'll even get another one of these out soon~ For those of you that did NaNaWriMo this year I hope you tried your best and perhaps joined me in the winner's circle. Great prizes this year :D Anywho, I'll stop talking now ;p

~Penny

**Oh yes! Thank you all for the support with the issue of the disgusting reviewer. I'm sorry I wasn;t able to reply to every single one of them but I do appreciate the support and love. Thank you all so much :D**