Greg was worried about going home. It had been so long since he had been there and the last time he was, he was grabbed by Jasper Marks and his nightmare had begun. Now today Nick was coming by to take him home.

The last few days his physical therapy sessions had gone fairly well. He was working hard to get back to normal strength. He didn't like feeling helpless. If he did have another encounter with Jasper or even Chris, he wanted to be able to give some kind of fight. So he had worked hard in his sessions. Misty even told him to slow down a little as he wore himself out after each session, but now he was well enough to be released.

Nick went up to the nurses' station to check on Greg's release. "Mr. Stokes, can we talk a minute?" A petite woman about the same age as him in a white doctor's coat was the one who called him. He recognized her as Dr. Warren; she was a psychologist who had spoken to Greg a few times while he was in the hospital.

"Yes, sure, what's up?" He asked her.

"Before you take Greg home, I want you to know that I am still worried a bit about him. He has yet to really say much about what really happened during those four months. You already know he suffers from panic attacks. Just keep an eye on him and let me know if there is something that bothers you about how he is acting. I'm worried he is yet to have a big emotional breakdown or PTSD symptoms," she told him.

He nodded in equal concern. "Yeah, I know. I worry too. He seems to refuse to tell me much. I get the feeling he thinks I will think less of him if I know the details of what happened to him, which is not the case," Nick confessed to her.

"Right and yet by keeping it all inside it is libel to take its toll on him. Just give me a call if you become worried." She handed him her business card.

"I'll keep this handy. Thanks for letting me know. Otherwise, is he ready to go home now?" He asked.

"Yes, Dr. Smith just finished with his final checkup. They removed his cast from his wrist today. He will just have to wear a brace for a while but it can be removed for showers. Make sure he replaces some of his bandages on his more serious scabs after bathing also. Otherwise Greg has his prescriptions already and he's just waiting for you. Take care of him." Nick nodded and thanked her.

He walked into Greg's room and saw him sitting on the side of the bed in jeans and his burgundy hoodie.

"So you ready to head home?" Greg looked up and saw Nick standing in the doorway.

"Yes, I am. I'm sick of this place. I'm ready to be home." He saw a nurse come in behind Nick with a wheelchair.

"Hospital policy to leave in a wheelchair," she smiled at him. He groaned but got up and went to sit in the chair, gently. He was still slightly sore. He looked up at her from the chair. "Can Nick at least push me out?"

She smiled with a nod. "Yes, he can." She let Nick take the handles on the wheelchair.

"You got your stuff?" Nick asked him. Greg patted the duffle bag that Nick had brought him the day before with his change of clothes. "Okay, let's get you out of here then."

Greg remained quiet as he pushed him out of the hospital into the parking lot and stopped for him to get to his feet at the SUV. Nick just smiled at him as he opened the door for him to get in.

As Nick started up the vehicle, he asked if Greg was okay, since he had been so quiet. "It's been so long since I have actually been anywhere besides that nasty basement or a hospital room, I am just absorbing it all."

Nick felt sadness, hearing what he had just said. He had not really thought about it that way. "How about I take the long way home from here, let you see some more of what you have been missing."

Greg gave him a sad smile. "I'd like that. Do you mind if I roll down the window too to get some fresh air? It feels nice out."

"Do whatever you please."

Nick kept glancing over at Greg on the drive home. Greg kept his face turned, looking out the open window. It seemed as if he had never breathed fresh air before. It made Nick's heart break just thinking how horrible it had to be to not see the outdoors or breathe fresh air for over four months. He was just getting a slight clue at how much Greg had missed when he was being held captive and how much it affected him.

"I never thought I would miss the Vegas strip and all the lights and casinos as much as I do." He turned to look at Nick. "If I haven't said it, thanks for saving me."

Nick looked at him and saw his eyes were watery. Nick gave him a small smile. "You're welcome." If his heart was not already breaking, it certainly was now seeing the somber look on his face. He wanted to just pull him into a hug right there, if he could. "We're almost home. Do you want to stop and get carry out?"

Greg nodded. "Chinese?"

"Sure, we can swing by China Jade."

After stopping to pick up some Chinese food, they arrived at the home they shared for the last two years. Nick got out of the SUV with the take out in hand and noticed that Greg had not moved. He saw him scanning the area. Nick frowned and went over to the passenger door and opened it. "Greg, he's not here now. Just let me take you inside, okay?"

Greg looked over at his boyfriend and chewed on his lower lip a moment before finally getting out of the vehicle. He walked close to Nick, as he unlocked the door. "Remind me to give you the new set of keys and the alarm code," Nick said as he quickly entered the house and shut the door. Greg heard the beeping of an alarm system and saw Nick go over to a control panel and punch in a code. Greg slowly walked farther into the house. Not much had changed since he had last seen it but it still felt foreign to him, almost.

Nick noticed that he had stopped about half way into the living room. He put the food down on the kitchen counter and came over to where Greg stood. "Hey, it's okay. If you want, I will check the whole place out just to make sure the coast is clear."

"Yeah, can you? I'm sorry but…," he was interrupted by Nick.

"No, no apologies. I understand. Just put down your duffle bag and sit tight. I'll be right back." Nick took off towards the hallway where the bedrooms were.

Greg put the duffle bag down on the coffee table and scanned the room. He saw a calendar on the wall with days crossed off on it. He went up closer to it and saw that the crossed off days stopped the day he was found. Nick really had been counting the days that he had been gone. He pulled the calendar off the wall and paged back through the last few months, ending up on the month of June. June 27th was the day the X's began. That was the day his nightmare began.

"I marked off every day, hoping one day I could stop and I did." He spun around and saw Nick standing behind him. "Sorry, didn't mean to sneak up on you. I just saw you looking at the calendar."

Greg put it back to the month of November and placed it back on the wall. "I did not really realize we were already in November and Thanksgiving was so close," he said to him.

"I was praying to find you before the holidays and I am glad I did. Now we can spend Thanksgiving and Christmas together, as it should be." Nick noticed he seemed to look unsure of something. "What's wrong? The house is clear. There is no one here."

"No, not that, It's nothing, I just…I'm sorry I ever thought you stopped looking for me," he told him sincerely.

"Look, don't worry about it. I can't blame you. Let's not worry about that and eat our food before it gets cold." Greg nodded and walked with Nick to the kitchen table and took a seat.

Greg had regained his appetite and chowed down on the Chinese food in no time flat. He leaned back in the chair when he finished and felt full. Nick smiled at him, seeing he was satisfied with his meal. "Do you maybe want to watch a movie tonight or something?" He asked him.

Greg shook his head. "No, I rather turn in early. I am tired; it's been a long day."

"Okay, well let me clean up here and I'll join you," Nick said to him as he gathered the plates on the table.

Greg's eyes widened. "Uh, I don't think I am ready to share our bed yet. I will just take the guest room."

Nick looked at him, a little surprised. "Oh. Well no, then I will sleep in the guest room, you can have the main bedroom."

"Nick, I don't want to argue. I'm fine with sleeping in the guest room, seriously. It's just until…well until I'm ready again." He hoped he would understand.

His boyfriend sighed, but he was not going to argue with him. He knew he still needed his space. He knew it was still too early but then he also thought that Greg liked having him close by. "Well just know, you are welcome back to our bed whenever you are ready."

"Thanks, I just don't want you mad at me."

"I couldn't be mad at you about that. I get it; you still need your space. Let me at least set up the guest room for you then. There are no sheets on the bed, so let me at least make it up for you," Nick told him.

"Okay. Um, I think I will take a shower then while you do that."

"Go ahead, do what you need. This is your house too, remember."

"Yeah I know everything just feels weird to me right now. But like you said, give it some time," Greg said with a slight smile.

"That's right," Nick smiled back. "I'll take care of things here, go ahead and take your shower. Yell if you need anything."

Greg got up and grabbed some stuff from the bedroom he usually shared with Nick and headed off to the bathroom. He saw that none of his stuff had been moved from its original position since he was gone. It made him feel more at home.

He found himself locking the bathroom door, something he never did before. After having been naked and exposed for so long, he was nervous at taking off all his clothes to take a shower. If he could have, he would have showered with clothes on but he knew that would be silly. He turned on the water and let it warm up. He took off his clothes quickly removed his wrist brace and got in the shower. The water was warmer than it probably should be and it burned against his wounds, but it was the first time he was able to bathe himself since being freed.

He immediately grabbed the bar of soap and washcloth and started scrubbing himself all over. Suddenly he could feel their hands all over him again and he needed to wash them off him. He kept soaping himself all over and rubbing harder than he should have in some areas, causing some not fully healed scabs to bleed. He peeled off the bandages that were still on some of the wounds and around his neck. He did not realize how long he was taking; he just had an overwhelming need to feel clean.

"Greg? Are you okay in there? You've been in there a while." Nick had finished cleaning up the kitchen and then setting up the guest bedroom for Greg and realized the shower was still running. It had been almost 30 minutes. He got worried and knocked on the door.

Greg was startled by Nick's voice and dropped the bar of soap. He reached down to pick it up and saw some of the water was running red. "Crap!" He said and realized he was bleeding somewhere.

"Greg!" Nick called again after no response and tried the door which he discovered was locked.

"Give me another couple of minutes and I'll be out," he finally yelled back. He took the shower head handle and rinsed himself off. He turned off the water and opened the door to grab a towel. He reached around his backside and touched a spot he knew where he had been burned badly by the mini torch. It was bleeding. He also could see a few other spots where the scabs had come off and he was bleeding. He opened the cabinet to pull out new bandages and realized his hands were shaking. He suddenly was finding it hard to breathe. He was starting to have a panic attack. He tried remembering what his doctor told him to do when this happened. He sat down on the toilet seat and tried to calm down so he did not feel like he was suffocating.

He heard Nick yelled his name again. He couldn't let Nick see him like this, he would freak out. "I…I need to reapply my …my bandages and I will be …out," he managed to tell him through quick breaths.

"I'll give you five more minutes and if you are not out, I'm busting this door down," Nick told him, worried about him taking so long.

Greg put his head between his legs and counted slowly to ten to calm his breathing to normal. After a minute he managed to relax enough to take the towel to dry himself off. He stood up and grabbed the bandages to place over the wounds he had irritated and broken open. Once done with the obvious one, he looked up in the mirror and saw his reflection. He saw the redness of the skin around his neck. He was not bleeding as it had mostly healed enough but the collar had left a permanent ring around his neck in pinkish scars. He shivered a moment thinking about that collar around his neck then he started putting a bandage around his neck to cover it. He was not sure he ever wanted to leave his neck exposed again. It would be the one truly visible reminder of his ordeal.

"Greg?" He heard Nick yell again. He huffed in frustration and quickly threw on his pajama bottoms and a long sleeved t-shirt. He grabbed his wrist brace and put it on his left wrist. "I'm coming, I'm coming."

He ran a hand through his unruly hair and vowed to get it cut shorter again. He didn't want the four month growth anymore. He took the towel that had some blood on it and balled it up and put it in the hamper. He took a deep calming breath before unlocking the door and opening it.

Nick looked him up and down once he came out. He looked like he had taken a fairly hot shower since his skin was still reddish. "Are you okay?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah, sorry I lost track of time." He started to walk past him. He stopped when Nick started speaking.

Nick had an idea why his shower took so long. "You know, after my babysitter had touched me, I could not wait to take a shower and wash the feel of her hands all over me off. I remember taking the longest shower I had ever taken…well at least until after I was buried alive. I know it's been over two weeks since you were found, but you never really got to clean yourself until now."

Greg looked down at the ground. He should have known Nick would understand. "Yeah, once I got in there I just kind of started freaking out and wanted to feel clean. I guess I got carried away. I opened a few of my wounds, but I bandaged them again. I'll be okay."

"Well, if you are okay now, why don't you go to bed? I'll bring you a couple of your pills the doctor said you need to take before you go to bed," Nick said to him softly.

"Thanks." Greg headed off to the guest room where the bed was ready for him to crawl into. They had a queen bed in the guest room which he could not wait to crawl in. He sat on the side of the bed, waiting for Nick to bring his medications.

Nick came in a minute later with a glass of water and three pills. "I got your stuff here." He handed them to Greg and watched him drink them down. Greg set the glass down on the nightstand.

"Thanks again," he said quietly.

"No problem. Why don't you get into bed now?"

He felt like a little kid being told to get into bed but in a way he liked it. He pulled back the sheets and crawled in and pulled them back up over him. He felt so much better being in a familiar bed. He had slept in that bed a few times in the past when they had a spat and he couldn't stand sharing the bed with Nick for a night.

Nick sat down on the edge of the bed. "If you need anything, just holler. I'm just a door away. I'm not that tired yet so I am going to catch up on some news and sports. But you get some rest. Sleep well, G."

Greg smiled timidly at him. "I'll try. Thanks for everything, Nick. I love you."

He grinned back at him. "I love you too. Things will get better, I promise." He grabbed his good hand and squeezed it tight in affection. Nick got up and headed out of the bedroom. He was about to close the door all the way when Greg stopped him.

"No! Uh, can you keep it a crack open? I can't deal with the complete darkness right now," he said sheepishly.

"Got it, I'll leave it like this," he said as he left it open about half a foot, letting some of the light from the hallway enter the room.

"Thanks and goodnight Nick."

"Night, Greg."

Greg turned over onto this side and pulled the covers all the way up to his neck, curling up tight. He hoped he would finally be able to have a good night sleep being he was home. He felt safe knowing Nick was in the other room and was able to fall fast asleep.

Reviews are appreciated! Thanks for continuing to read....tbc