A few days had gone by and Greg seemed to be suffering less from panic attacks and nightmares as they went by. Greg's parents had invited them to come out to California for Thanksgiving. It was still over a week away and Greg told them they had to think about it. He was not sure he wanted to travel yet, but truthfully he not sure he could deal with his parents asking him a ton of questions and how he was dealing with everything.
He hadn't told Nick hardly anything else about the time he was held captive since the time Nick had left him alone. Since then Nick had was always with him. Greg either went with him to the store or Sara or Catherine had stopped by to visit while Nick ran errands.
Nick did have to go back to work though and he offered for Greg to join him at the lab but he was not yet ready to face everyone there. "I promise not to freak out this time when I am home alone. I think I got myself together now that I won't let a cat scratching the door bother me," he said to Nick.
"Okay, but if you need me for anything, you know you can call me anytime. I will come home as soon as I can," Nick reminded him.
"Yes, I know but I swear I'll be fine. I got this book to read and I can always pop in a movie if I want. Most likely I'll sleep some too." Greg told him.
Greg still was keeping his distance from Nick physically, so when Nick left he just waved goodbye to him. Nick hoped that his boyfriend wouldn't freak out this time around, but he had told him he had not been getting the panic attacks. Greg still had the nightmares but he didn't tell Nick about having them. He didn't want to trouble him anymore with them. He let Nick believe that they had lessened greatly.
Greg made sure the door was completely locked and the security system set. Then he went around the house and closed any blinds and drapes that were still open. He turned on a light in almost every room and then finally settled down on the sofa. He had lied to Nick. He was scared to be alone again but he knew he had to get over his fear if he was ever to move on.
He turned on some music and settled down with his book. After a while he actually enjoyed being alone and able to listen to music and just relax. The music helped block out any weird noises he might hear that would make him freak out.
He had actually dozed off on the sofa when the phone ringing startled him awake. He quickly reached for it and saw it was Nick calling. He looked at the time and saw that a few hours had passed already. "Hey Nicky, checking up on me? I was snoozing and you woke me."
"Sorry Greg. Listen I am actually calling you for a reason. Uh, you need to come on down here. We found a body tonight not far from the Palms. The ID on him says he is Christopher Matthews. He looks like the guy Chris, you described. We need you to come down and let us know if it is the same guy," Nick said to him. He hated doing this to him but they had to find out if it was the same guy.
Greg was shocked and a little scared. "Uh, you really think it's him? He's dead?"
"He was shot three times in the chest. Are you okay to drive here? Or do you want me to swing by and pick you up?" Nick asked him, knowing he still had his fears about leaving their home all alone.
Greg subconsciously rubbed at his neck nervously. "I guess I can get myself down there okay. I didn't forget how to drive."
"Okay well let me know just before you get here. I will meet you in the parking garage."
"Okay, will do. See you soon." Greg hung up the phone and looked around nervously. It was the middle of the night and he had to leave the house alone. Maybe he should have had Nick pick him up. No, he thought, he had to get some guts and go out on his own. Jasper was not going to be waiting for him. He wouldn't be that stupid. He got up and went to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face. His bruises were gone completely now. Around the house he wore long sleeved shirts that exposed his neck. Now he decided to change and put on a turtle neck. He had gone out with Nick a few days ago and they bought some for him just in case he wanted to wear them. Now called for a time to wear one.
He went to his closet and pulled out a dark blue one and then grabbed a jacket. He also grabbed the pocket knife that Nick gave him years ago but he never carried it with him prior. He decided he wanted to have something on him for protection, just in case.
He went around and turned off some of the lights. He went to the main home computer and looked at the security feed from outside. He did not see anyone around. He went to the main door and looked out the peephole to make sure no one was there. Their garage was full of storage so their cars always were parked outside. He got the alarm ready and then opened the door and went out quickly, locking the door behind him. He practically ran to his car and got in. He almost had a panic attack right in his car but he managed to keep his breathing steady. He started up his car and sighed. There was no one there to grab him; he was going to be okay.
He pulled into the parking garage a few minutes later and saw Nick waiting for him. He had called prior just like he asked him to. Nick walked up to the car and smiled at him, happy to see he made it in one piece. Greg got out and tugged nervously at his jacket. He had not been back to the lab yet and it made him nervous to run into everyone, which he was bound to do.
"I know this is not easy for you, G, but I appreciate you coming down, so does Brass. So come on and follow me. I'll try to get you in without everyone hounding you, because I know you were not ready yet to come back," Nick told him.
Greg smiled appreciatively at him. He followed closely behind Nick as they entered the building. They headed straight for the morgue. Amazingly enough they did not run into anyone on the way there. "Everyone else is pretty much out on a case right now or busy with their work. I got this case. The body was called in by a garbage man. His body was right by a dumpster," Nick explained to him.
Greg just nodded. He tried not letting his nerves get the best of him.
Nick entered the morgue first. "Hey Doc. Greg is here with me to identify that guy."
Doc Robbins looked up from his work. "Hello Greg. Nice to see you again. Nick tells me you are doing pretty well."
Greg gave him a weak smile. "Yeah, I am doing okay." He didn't feel like much conversation. Doc Robbins noticed this and moved over to another body, covered up on a table.
"Come here, this is our guy." Nick walked over with Greg to the table. Doc Robbins pulled back the sheet covering the body to reveal the man's face. They both looked at Greg for his reaction. They noticed him tense up and pale.
"Yeah, yeah that's him," he said quietly. He felt a little sick, seeing the face of one of the men who violated him over and over, lying dead on the table. "How did he die again?" he asked with a noticeable quiver in his voice.
"Three bullets to the chest, one to the heart," he told him.
"I see," was his only response. He didn't know what else to say. He was feeling like he might throw up. "Pardon me; I need to run to the bathroom." And with that he took off through the door and ran to the restroom.
Doc looked at Nick, shaking his head sadly. "He's not doing as well as he seems, is he."
Nick pursed his lips together. "No, I don't think so. I'm going to give him a moment before I check on him. What else can you tell me about this guy? Any sign of a struggle?"
Doc shook his head. "No, but I can tell you it was a close range shot due to the damage. I gave Bobby Dawson the bullets I abstracted from the body."
"Thanks, I'll check with him next."
Greg was in the end stall and had lost his dinner. He flushed the toilet and pulled the cover down and sat down on it. His hands were trembling. He remembered the last time he saw Chris alive.
He was lying on the filthy mattress, unable to move. His whole body hurt, he couldn't take the abuse anymore. Then he heard the door open and someone coming down the stairs. He curled up tighter and started mumbling over and over again, "please leave me alone, please I beg you, don't hurt me anymore. I can't take it." Tears were flowing from his eyes as he begged in a weak, raspy voice. His eyes were squeezed shut. He could tell someone was near him, but they had not spoken yet.
"I won't touch you. I'm sorry I've taken part in this. I didn't realize it would get as bad as it has but you have to understand, in our society, we follow the leads and Jasper is a lead. His time in prison gave him respect in our world. Plus he is intimidating, you know that."
Greg recognized the voice as Chris', the last to join the trio of torturers and rapists. "Help me then. Help me get out of here," he begged the man.
"I can't. He'll know," he whispered to him.
"Then tell my friends, tell them where to find me. Please, otherwise kill me. I can't take anymore," he wept quietly.
"I…," Chris began but then he heard noise above. Someone else was coming, most likely Jasper. He immediately stood up over Greg. He waited until he heard the door open and then started yelling profanities at Greg. Once he heard Jasper coming down the stairs, he began to kick Greg in the side.
Greg cried out in pain. The pain was never ending and he could barely breathe anymore because of the pain.
"Ah, I see you came over early to have some fun. I guess you had a frustrating day, always fun to take it out on our boy here," Jasper chuckled. He leaned down closer to Greg to whisper in his ear. "Although personally I've had a few frustrating years in prison I still need to get out of my system. Looks like you're here for a while yet, if you survive much longer." He stood up and looked down at the pathetic figure, curled up on the dirty mattress.
"You are starting to get a bit messy looking. Perhaps after some fun tonight I'll let you have some recovery time to heal a bit and then I can start the fun again," Jasper said to him. "But first, since Chris was down here, he gets first dibs on you tonight. Front or back, Chris?"
Greg cracked open his eyes to see Chris start unzipping his pants. "I feel like back tonight." He closed his eyes again, knowing this would never end.
He pressed his hands to his head, wishing the memories would end. But he knew they never would, however he knew what could make him forget for a while. He wasn't at home though. Then he remembered he brought the pocket knife with him. It was in his back pocket. He took it out and opened it up. He pushed up his sleeves and looked at his arms. They were already pretty messed up plus since he was not at home he could not hide it as well. He then stood up and pulled down his pants and sat back on the seat. He looked at his legs, some cuts were already there. He gritted his teeth and then ran the blade along his left thigh. He welcomed the pain it brought as it drowned out all other thoughts and pains. He made another slight cut, enough to generate more pain.
He suddenly heard the door open and quickly wiped off the blade with toilet paper and shoved it in his back pocket.
"Greg? Are you going to be okay? You've been in here a while?" He heard Nick say.
"Yeah, give me just a couple more minutes for my stomach to settle down and I will be out, okay?" he told him. He started taking toilet paper and trying to stop the bleeding on his leg. He wore jeans and knew they would rub against the cuts some.
"Okay, I'll wait for you outside the door here," Nick told him.
"Fine," he yelled back.
Once he heard the door close, he started taking a bunch of toilet paper and wrapping it around his leg like a bandage. He managed to cover it pretty well. He then stood up and slowly pulled up his pants, feeling some more pain as the pants rubbed against the old and new marks. This pain he could live with though. It was pain he controlled. He looked to make sure he didn't spill any blood on his jeans, Nick couldn't find out. He came out and looked in the mirror. He was pale but otherwise no trace of what he just did. He washed his hands off and proceeded to exit the restroom.
"I'm feeling better now. Can I go back home? You don't need me anymore here, do you?" He asked Nick as he came up to him outside the door.
"Yeah, we can go home. I'll follow you, just in case you start feeling ill or something. I'm done here tonight."
"Oh," he responded, somewhat disheartened. He would rather be home alone instead of Nick watching over him like a hawk, which he knew would happen.
When they got home, Greg headed to the bathroom. He took time to remove the toilet paper bandage he had on his leg and threw it in the toilet. Then he looked at his leg and it looked like he would be fine without putting a bandage back on it. He flushed the evidence and then was done. Nick had gone to shower and change into clothes for bed. Greg decided to change into his PJ's. He pulled on the long loose, drawstring pants and his long sleeved shirt he wore to bed lately. He went back out to see if Nick was in the living room. He knew he was going to want to talk about Chris.
Nick had just come out and was in the kitchen grabbing a bottle of cranberry juice. "You want some?" He asked Greg when he saw him.
"Sure." Greg sat down on the sofa and waited for Nick to come with the bottle of juice.
Nick handed it to him and then sat down next to him. "So, you want to tell me what's on your mind? I know seeing that guy had to be hard for you."
Greg frowned and pulled his knees to up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. He rested his chin on his knees. "I never thought I would see him dead. It was just weird. I hoped he would get caught, like the others, naturally. Now I guess I don't need to worry about him at least. I am betting Jasper killed him, though."
"Why do you think that?" Nick asked him.
"He came to me alone once and told me he was sorry he ever got involved. I begged him to set me free but he said Jasper was dangerous and he would find out. I then told him to tell someone where I was."
Nick nodded in acknowledgment. "He was the one who called me and told me where to find you, probably."
"Yes and Jasper probably figured it out and found him and killed him."
"Was Chris as bad as Jasper and Rex?" Nick tried asking, not sure Greg would answer.
"Hmm, basically yes because usually Jasper was there too when he was. He did look uncomfortable a few times doing what he was doing but overall he still took part," he shrugged.
"Well at least only one is still out there."
"Yeah so I hope," he said but thought momentarily of who it was who came with a black leather mask a couple of times. He always figured it was Chris, because he had been embarrassed to be taking part in what he was doing. "But Jasper is still out there and he's the one that scares me the most. If he did kill him, it means he is still in town. It means he is worse than I even thought. He is willing to kill to get his way. What if he is waiting for a time to come at me again?" Greg said to him, his eyes full of worry.
"He would be stupid, seeing as we have security and everything now. Plus you are not alone that often."
Greg suddenly got up and walked around the room. "Yeah but when he sets his mind to something he does not give up."
Nick frowned as he watched his boyfriend pace. He noticed a stain on Greg's pants that looked sort of familiar. "Greg, is that blood on your pants?"
Greg suddenly looked down in horror. He had not even realized one of his cuts had started bleeding. He cursed himself for not putting a bandage on it now. "Uh, no, I think I maybe spilt juice," he replied lamely.
"I would have seen you spill juice. I thought all your wounds were healed up now," Nick said to him. He noticed Greg seemed very worried.
"Um, well I guess not. I better get it bandaged," he said as he started heading to the bathroom.
Nick suddenly started wondering. He knew Greg had been spending a lot of time in the bathroom recently. Also he had not seen him without long sleeves or long pants since the first day he came home from the hospital. "Come here. Let me see your leg and how bad it is."
"I'll be fine, Nick. I'll be right back," he said as he kept walking.
Nick jumped up and went after him, stopping him from shutting the door to the bathroom at the last moment. "Let me see your leg, Greg," he said more forcefully. He saw fear in his eyes.
"Really, Nick, it's nothing serious. I can take care of myself," he said nervously.
"So you say but I still want to see your leg."
Greg chuckled nervously. "Seriously Nick, come on, and let it go."
Nick now knew something was wrong. He didn't want to do what he was going to do next, but he had to find out the truth. He grabbed Greg's left arm quickly, earning a yelp and a wide eyed fearful look from Greg. He pulled up his sleeve and was horrified. His eyes flew up to look into Greg's, whose were on the verge of tears and his mouth agape. "My God, Greg. What have you been doing to yourself? Is your leg as bad as your arm here?"
Greg yanked his arm back and pushed his sleeve down. "It's not as bad as it looks," he said feebly.
Nick shook his head in disbelief. "We need to talk. Now!"
Greg hung his head; his secret to keeping his mind off what happened to him had been discovered. He sighed heavily. "Okay."
A/N-Thanks again everyone for your gracious reviews. :) TBC...