hello there all of you wonderful readers. i want to tell you how super sorry i am for not updating. my life just like everyone else's never goes as plan. Thanks to all the comments you have no idea how much they motivated me to start thinking and writing. So welcome new readers.

Lady Babette, my chica, girl thanks for listening to my rants and my thoughts! You help me through so much and i am grateful to have you.

Chapter 9

'Fuck it!' thinking to myself feeling my heart cracking as i fall from the top floor railing. I did this to him, hurt him so bad, he my sweet Blay would rather push me away than take my kiss. But of course he would, i have played tug-a-war with his and my heart for years now. I always knew how he felt, and living the fucked up life i have. i needed him to show me the affection he did. so i did whatever i could to get him to stay. no matter if it was fight with my shirt off, and feel his hot gaze down my body, or fuck even ball those girls in the bathroom with me so he could finally get sum without getting his own. We would only have sex with women together, i just couldn't bare the thought of him being touched by another men, and then him with women never made sense. such a self bastard, i know it. But even if i deny him, and myself there are still things i knew my head couldn't take.

Hmm i am still falling, jeez how far is this drop, my mind is too geared up to demat. My senses dulled, but i wait for the contact with the hard floor, maybe if i smash my skull then i wont have to think for a bit. Get some R&R is the OR. Sounds like a plan to me.

'Sir Qhuinn,' hearing and then inhaling the cinnamon scent, that fill my nostrils. Layla, i realize and judging by the sound of her voice she is right under me. Damn it, its always something. If i keep falling she could be really hurt by my weight falling on her. And there is already two people mortally wounded by my actions tonight. I flip over to catch myself with my hands, and sadly not my head. Pinning her under me. Her thin body just a tad softer than the marble, stops my fall as she cradled herself instantly. Pausing at the nausea that is rising in my throat at her touch, she takes the chance and grinds her sex against my not so hard package. i just cant seem to get hard these days, fuck who knew? My hands on either side of her face, her eyes are glazed and her scent bombards my nose, i think i will vomit in just a moment.

Everyone of my instincts are telling me to flee, me and her haven't been this close in almost a month. After that last night we spent together, the night Blay went to Sax...well anyways i don't even call her for feeding. Using whatever Chosen is visiting the house.

SHIT QHUINN! I can not believe i just pushed his ass over the rail, and 2nd i can not believe he let me. that defeated look in his eye right before he went over was heartbreaking. But that is the story of us, is it not? Running to the rail to look over it, i feel like i have just been suckered punched in the gut.

Baring my fangs, my bonding scent starts to show through the mix of cologne i am wearing and i growl. LAYLA, i do not normally speak ill of the fairer sex but that bitch! My instincts are to pounce, remove him from her thighs, than sink my fangs into his beautiful neck and mark him as MINE! But that word is what brings me back to reality, making me stop my scent from pouring out of my skin.

Before i can stop myself i speak. "Yeah its Guys like you Qhuinny!" i pour all of my hatered, and saddness into that statement. I see his body stiffen and he finally untangles himself from HER limps, the bastard could have at least waited til he got to his room! FUCK HIM! Sometimes you just have to cuss! My eyes are glowing i can feel it and he looks up at me.

"Blay..."

"Don't you Blay me, you don't have that right anymore!" i yell not caring that i am in the presents of a lady...well if i can even call her that. but i know it isn't fair of me to think these things of her. She is just like me, a victim of that male down there. He is just looking at me, with that sad puppy dog expression and i am happy to say that for once i am immune. "You know what Qhuinn," i say with a calm and coldness i have never heard from my voice. "Take care of yourself." Spinning off i stomp into my room, and slam my door.

Xhex hangs up the phone and walks into her mated room where her hellren is laying on the bed in nothing but his leathers. YUM YUM YUM, she nearly drools. He must have put those on when i went to talk on the phone.

Who was you talking to? he signs

"Saxton," was my one word response my mouth is watering watching the way his body flexes with every movement he makes. He is perfection.

'I did not know that you and him talked? he made a soundless growl, damn he was sexy.

Smiling, i should make him jealous. I love the bonded male in him, "from time to time, he isn't such a bad guy, and he handles some biz for me."

John instantly relaxes and signs "so what does he want?"

i laugh at his nonchalant jealousy. "funny enough, us. He was wondering if me and you would like to go out with him and Blay tomorrow night.' John's emotion go out of control, a part of him is happy for Blay, the other is worried about Qhuinn. 'JOHN, i think it will be fun." I try to reassure him, to attempt to ease his nerves.

'Will it make you happy to do this. You aren't really the social type' he signs.

Laughing out loud, i think sometimes he forgets about my other-side.

"john, i think this will be wonderful for Blay, he needs us right now. And even if he is your friend, you love him, so i do too."

John nodded, and agreed that it might be fun. His concern for his two best friend was written all over his body...Speaking of that body its been too long since it was inside me. Taking off my tshirt and throwing it at him, he catches it in mid-air as his scent bombards my nose. Being mated him was the best thing i could have ever done.

'Sir Qhuinn, where are you going,'" i say to the brooding male of my affection as he tries to stomps away. He turns around and the look he gives me shatter me. Its the look of a mad man, a man that has lost everything and makes me take a step back in fear of what he might do. I thought he loved me, the things me and him have shared. The wonderful thing he has taught me, we spent countless hours together, our bodies pressed together, moans i made, slight glows would leave his throat, setting my body on fire. Then one day, he stopped calling me, and ignoring my calls.

"Layla," his voice cracks saying my name like it was something nasty. "it is not your doing but i can not see you right now.'" he says so quiet and my heartbreaks...no it feels like it is being ripped out of my chest. I grasp at it, and look down expecting to see my heart beating on the floor.

"Sir, what have i done?" i ask, pleading, begging for him to answer me. Holding my breath his gaze never falters but he isn't looking at me as he answer, even though his eyes are locked on mine.

"It is not you Layla, as much as i tried it was never you." he says than runs up the stairs leaving me their in his wake, empty. Damn you Qhuinn.