Chapter 13

Welcome for those of you who are new!

Lady Babette hun I'm trying. i know you are going through a tough time...maybe this might make you feel better.

This one does have a youtube link! Please go to it so you can hear the song ;p Thanks everyone. if only the bottom half half of the link shows up, it is just youtube.

"hey there stranger," whispering into the gaged ear of the plus size beauty in front of me. Turning around her deep eyes lock on to my deformed ones..

"Well hello," she smiles back with her red painted lips, a sex look on her face. "haven't seen you since what, yesterday?" Arching her right pierced eyebrow. Laughing at her making fun of me, its always fun when the ladies wanna take you on.

Watching Blay and Sax has got me wired. They are so damn perfect for each other. how stupid was I to ever believe i could give him what he thinks he wants. Blaylock prolly doesn't even notice how he protects the slut bastard, orbiting each other, like Sax is his personal sun! Damn it, i think i just quote Twilight. I have to get them outta my head and stop reliving all those slight touches they exchange without shame. How the entire night they have been snuggled up to each other. Is this how they act in public, thank god i can ignore them in private.

"Glad i could amuse you,' she cooed again leaning into me. I cant help but take a look at her amazing tits stretching the logo of her shirt. All large, pushed up in a black lace bra, her skin had a creamy tint, and i knew they would be soft to the touch. Smiling as i see her necklace for the first time, Silver vampire grill. this chick rocked."My eyes are up here." she says nudging me with her lush hips.

"sorry, just noticed your necklace," I say touching the cool chain, but really just an excuse to graze those amazing tits. I was correct, soft and yummy. Wouldn't mind sinking my fangs into them.

"Yeah, what can i say, i am a vampire girl." looking deep into my eyes again she doesn't flinch, doesn't make a face of disgust, or admiration. She just looks at me. Smiling again trying not to show off my own set of fangs.

"Oh really now." Leaning down to her ear, "So what if i was your vampire?" This time my pride took a hit as she busted out laughing IN MY FACE! Harsh.

"Really? Did you seriously just quote Marilyn Manson to me?" she slightly punches my chest.

Not really so sure of myself, bloody female! Why isn't she swooning, not that i am conceited, The SV knows i think very little of myself, but most human females, when i give them a look, or a whisper or the slightest of touch, they are on their knees, my dick scraping the back of their throats. but not this chick! Finally realizing i haven't answered her question, "maybe i did?" I smile.

"Well thank you smexy, but i don't think my wife would approve," she smiles brilliant to me, taking a sip of her beer, my mind processes what she just said.

"WIFE?" i say a lil too loud. Two girls, that should be fun. Like not two straight girls that are down to fuck cuz they want the guy, but two real life, tree hugging, animal rights, black thumb lesbian.

"I see that look, mister, and sorry you are most def barking up the wrong tree. Which i do not hug by the way, and my garden is like me and my wife lush and plenty!" she pretend to be offended. I know my face gave something away as she still smiled at me. How the fuck did she know what i was thinking. Inhaling her scent again, it smells mostly of human, but than there is something else there, not quite sure but...

"Did i hear someone call for me," A beautiful biracial girl with long black hair parted into two big pigtail plats hanging half way down her back. She had a smaller body than Lisa, curvy at the bottom, but her brilliant teeth caught me off guard like her high pitched voice. Her scent was different too, less human on her end. This isn't right, something is off here. Lisa took my left hand, holding tight, turning me to look at her and her wife.

"Lush, meet Qhuinn. Qhuinn, meet my wife." The darker girl took my right hand to say hello, meeting my eyes. I am not sure what happen, but the rest of the world fell away, turning black. there was no light, no shades of gray, just darkness. I can still feel the girl holding my hands, but she and the entire bar is just gone. I am not falling, its as if someone just cut off all the lights. But now i can not hear anyone.

"Where am I?' I scream, still clutching on to a hands that i can no longer see. But i feel the two gently rubbing lopsided circles in my palms, i can hear them now. It almost sounds like a chant in the old language, but really that cant be. Maybe i am nuts, going insane, hell i cant remember the last time i fed, or Sweet Scribe Virgin i am blind.

"No, I fear you are not blind. But if you are ever to see more than the shades of gray you know. I shall advise you son of mine that you follow the path that heart of yours has taken you."

Looking around for the voice, "Mom?" i say out loud. It did sound like my mother, but at the same time did not. No longer feeling the hand, i blindly feel around trying to touch something solid, and feeling a wall, by the texture alone it feels like marble.

"Mom, Where am I, and who are you really?" I ask into the darkness. There is no way it would be my mother, she is dead, they are all dead and not one of them ever gave a damn about me.

"No questions, for I have given you answers before." The voice of the female, came and left, sounding sorta pissed off. Light suddenly appear blinding me for real, and I see where i am.

I have been here before, but where? Its so familiar. A long corridor with a door at the end...to the end. the fade. "Oh Scribe Virgin what has happen why am i here? Was women really the death of me? I guess its better than having to watch the love of my life in my cousins arms for the next 900 years." sounding bitter.

With no response, not like i am expecting one since i know where i am. i walk to the door, looking back i see a solid wall behind me. Pushing on it, it pushes forward. Just fuckin great, there is no back only forward. The handle is calling my name, and i have been here, i remember opening that door and expecting my death, but instead there was...OH FUCK! Rushing with all of my might i Open the door, and for the second time in my entire life i see, real red hair, and real blue eyes, and real white crooked smile. "I have been waiting for you." the man says, and i fall to the floor and back into blackness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LF~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"we have an amazing drug rehab and support group here at the church, my son." hearing the fathers sympathetic voice makes me want to break something. I told him everything, about me, Beth, The Brothers, V, the transition, V, Marissa, the Omega, and V. Clearly he thought my entire confession was bogus! Well doesn't this suck."I fear, father i am in need of none of these! but I thank you very much. Stepping out, looking at the beautiful painted ceiling, the beautiful altar, the resting place of the saints. Then of course the life size statues of the chosen ones, around the church. Goin to be real, here i am a grown ass man, and them things still give me the creeps. Waiting patiently, i hear the young priest take his leave, hurrying to catch his gaze as he pulls the curtain open.

"I was never here, you have been walking around the church for the last 30 minutes. You will forget me after you close your eyes, then open them 5 seconds later.

Quickly covering his memory, hoping the guy doesn't have nightmares or a headache. i hall ass to the SUV, jumping in and gettin the hell outta dodge!

"should have been s fuckin Buddhist!" turning up the radio as i make my way back to the manse, needing to get this shit with V out in the open.

buzzz buzzz buzzz feeling my phone going off in my leather, i pick it up already knowing who it is.

"come home, we will talk about it." i hear the voice say, but i am still hurt by his words.

"I am 30 minutes away, see you in 10."

"be careful," was the bastards parting words as he hung up.

"Fuckin Bastard."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LF~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

'Don't be Jealous of my boogie,' singing to myself emptying my bladder in one of the urinals. Tonight has been a blast. All of us dancing to the Time Warp, Me and Sax kissing and just being comfortable. Even the look on the jocks face when Qhuinn asked the plus size beauty to dance, then he stayed over there with her talking and flirting, it was priceless. I couldn't even be mad, i was here with Saxton having a great time, and the beautiful woman deserved a beautiful time. I just hope the lust in his eyes doesn't seduce her hipsters off, she seems like a respectful female and i wish her the best. Washing my hands, feeling the drinks i take a gander at my reflection.

"Lookin for me Pumpkin?" Qhuinns reflections says boring his eyes through me. He coming out of the only stall.

"No, I seen you. You enjoying yourself?" he looked puzzled, and his color was a little off. "With the female?" i ask, him still looking confused, hell he must be drunk. "There isn't an easy way to say this without sounding jealous, but be nice to the female. She seems worth her weight in gold." Gah i am an ass! there was no pun intended.

His eyes light up and he weakly smiles like something is on his mind, "Oh Lisa, yeah she rocks. I actually know her."

That shocked me, Qhuinn doesn't really KNOW anyone, and i cant help but to resent the plus size hussy. "whats that look about?' he asks, leaning closer to me in the small space, his color picking up.

"What look?" I ask washing my hands again breaking the eye contact. Coming up he nudges my shoulder.

"the pouty look you just gave me?"

"Its for no reason, it is not business who you know and who you don't." possibly i spoke too quickly giving me away, or maybe it was the near snarl, but he barked out laughing. "whats so funny," i huffed looking at him laughing, the man is forever hauntingly beautiful. Crossing my arms over my chest so it doesn't burst out of my body.

"don't be jealous Blay," he smacks my shoulder. "she is just a cool female," he nods now looking away from me as he washes his hands. "that bartend at a bar i frequent." Well hmm that made sense.

"so you have this secret friend?" I couldn't help but ask. It was a knee jerk reaction.

"No she isn't a secret i just never ran into her outside of Bella Mourte, she is cool. The light skin brown girl is her wife of 6 years. They both have men they use for sex, but the love they give is only to each other. So really Blay no worries." drying off his hands, and throwing the paper towel in the trash, has me hard a rock. God the little things he does, it drives me crazy.

"So you don't find her beautiful?' I ask being a dick, if he says yes than i will be angry, if he says no he is a dick.

"Pfft she is pretty smokin to be honest, on the meaty side. But thats cool i am a vampire, not werewolf who chews on bones." he winks at me, making my face flame. "but you are correct she is of a nice stock. I cant taint her," he weakly smiled making my heart ache for him.

"Then why was you showing her your best lustful gaze, huh? Giving her your bedroom Qhuinn eyes? I seen you earlier, locked gazes you couldn't look away from her and her 'wife'" there wasn't any stopping myself. All those damn PBR has gotten me drunk, and i just couldn't stop from saying or asking what was on my mind. And sounding like a jackass.

"You mean this," he says huskily turning that mis-matched stare into me, slowly seducing me with his eyes as they roam my body. My throat is dry and i hate that i am rock hard. He licks his lips as he makes his way back to me, stopping at the vein that is beating hard at my neck. "Weird and crazy shit has happen tonight, i am in a honest mood." His stare hypnotized me, i couldn't move, think, hell i could barely breath. He walks closer we are less than half an inch away from each other, i feel his heat through his clothes and through mine. Goosebumps rise all over my body as i stare at him, the man i will always love but never have. Angling his head up a notch, his lips are almost touching mine, i can taste his breath on my lips. "i have been looking at you." he whispers as he finally touches my shoulders with his hands, gentle rubbing them. I think i am about to start hyperventilating.

"w-w-w-why me, why now?" whispering back, not to play his game but because that is really all i could do.

"because i want you," he breathes on my neck and I moan. "But i can not have you." bringing his face to look at me, making me endure his torture yet again, rubbing his thumbs over my cheek.

OH FUCK THIS! My he is fucking with me again DAMN HIM! "DAMN YOU QHUINN!" screaming at him pushing him away. "Damn you, you will not do this to me. I will not let you!' I scream at his shocked face.

"What did i do Blay?" he pleaded with his eyes.

"EVERYTHING, you don't want me but no one else can have me! Or worse you do want me but you don't have the balls to take me! I have loved you forever, never, no matter what you have done to me, in front of me, or in-spite of me has that love ever wavered. But i tell you this now Qhuinn. This game you play with my heart is over. I will not allow you to do this to me again." Turning on my heels i storm out and walk past everyone. Pass the giggling girls, pass the douche-bag guy, pass John and Xhex, and past my male. I hear Qhuinn coming behind me, but i do not pay him any attention as i walk to wards the DJ. Whispering in his ear and passing him a $100 bill so i can be next up.

"Blay, stop, turn around, lets talk?" he says to me, but i don't budge. i know to our friends we are causing a scene, but I just cant let this continue. I am finishes with this tragic saga! the i love yous i want you, but i don't want you.

"Next up we got Blaylock!" I hear my name over the p.a. walking on too the stage, i look at my lover, his concern look makes me smile. John and Xhex are staring, i feel xhex probing at me, sliding my shield up to keep her outta my fuckin head. The music starts. (youtube .com/watch?v=5uqUAxNsCE4)

"You better crawl, on your knees." I began singing with my eyes close, than opening them to find that mis-match stare. Locking gazes i sing this to him. Maybe now he will get it. "Before the next time you say that you love me." He flinches but i cant bring myself to care.

"Fall on your knees, because this time I won't be so kind," making sure he sees all of my emotion as i sing this tragic song that i feel was taylor made for the two of us. "Can't you see that this is life and life is killing me!"

~~~~LF~~~

"Is it yours? is it mine?" i hear his heartbreakingly beautiful voice sing to me as his watery eyes look nowhere else but at mine. Gosh why are things this messed up with the two of us. I lied when i told Wraith i wouldn't take killing Lash back. Because for him, for my Blaylock i will! I would damn it! If i would have never slit that bastards throat, than i wouldn't have been on the run. Than i wouldn't have had to try and crush Blaylock. Well there really isn't a trying is there? I managed it, but i didn't just stop there. I take it back, i scream in my head as Blaylock screams the lyrics.

"Tell me, over and over and over and over and over never was time for us, it never was time to let me in. Show me, over and over and over and over and over again. It never was time for us, it never was time to let me in"

My eyes water as i still stare at him, as he sings this tragic song with his shattered heart and soul.

"You better see how evil you can be,When you see my evil smile. It's the one that you'll remember when I am not so kind." he croons and i feel like my insides are split into a millionpeices. "Can't you see that this is death and death is saving me." he closes his beautiful eyes to me then, his voice cracking and i cant take it anymore. The male was killing me.

Turning from him, i walk straight to the bar and buy the bottle of the strongest shit they had and walked over to the corner, away from Saxton, away from John, and Xhex, even away from Lisa and her freaky paranormal voodoo shit she did to me. That trance really fucked me up, but i seen it, i seen color again. I seen the blue of his eyes. Before i woke back up looking at the Lovers, smiling as if they knew what jut happen. I need to talk to V or someone about it. But the hardest part was getting away from Blaylock as he screams at me "Tell me, over and over and over and over and over again. It never was time for us, it never was time to let me in."

Looking at my beautiful friend, the man that will forever have my heart, the Lover i will forever long to be there for, to take care of, the man i have loved even when i didn't know what love was. He was letting me go, and i mourn him now, as i will my Lover forever.