On the Wednesday morning of September 10th, 2012, I awoke at around nine to my family huddled around my bed singing at the top of their lungs. " Happy birthday to youuuu!" They finish, Emmett dragging out the 'you' for a big conclusion. I had a double-filled Reese's (my addiction) for breakfast with a candle in it and a glass of black bear blood (my other addiction), and took the day off from school, although that was because Alice had yesterday seen that the sun would be drifting in and out of the clouds today.
I got dressed in a white halter top dress with huge pink polka-dots all over it that came to my mid-thigh; Alice picked it out, of course. I pinned my hair up with pearl pins and it looked like I had waves of copper beautifully falling over each other. I put brown eyeliner on the top and bottom rims of my eyes and pomegranate-flavored pink lip gloss.
I went downstairs and found the house in its typical birthday decor – hundreds of balloons, candles burning everywhere, presents towering on a table next to another table that holds a cake made of many layers and purple and yellow frosting, my favorite colors.
"I think you looked better before you changed." Dad frowns at me. Before I changed, my hair was a frizzy mess and I was wearing an over-sized sweatshirt and sweatpants.
"Gee, thanks Dad." I frown.
"You've just grown up too fast." He sighs sort of apologetically. I know what he means. This dress shows off my curves and chest and long legs, and with my hair done up like this I look almost like an adult.
"I'm still your little girl." I tell him with a smile. It's weird that he is only a year older than me now.. I prefer to think of it as him being over a century older than me.
"Okay, now I think we all know what her first present should be." Alice says from across the room.
"We're opening presents already?" I ask in puzzlement. Usually we go on a road trip to the closest big city and find somewhere nice to eat, then come back, open presents, go on a big family hunt, and then I have a piece of cake. Needless to say, I eat a lot during birthdays.
Alice looks like she wishes we weren't, this obviously messes with her plans, and so she sighs before she says, "Only one. And it's just-"
"Just the best present of them all." A deep voice says just as the kitchen door swings open and a tall, muscular, tan form with cropped black hair comes out.
"Jacob!" I gasp, realizing I hadn't even paid attention when I heard a rapid heartbeat or smelled a woodsy scent tracking through the house. Those things are just so natural to me – just part of my Jacob. I haven't seen him in close to two months though, not since summer when I went to visit him on the reservation. I run over to him and throw myself at him. He hugs me around my waist, spinning me in a circle.
"I cannot believe you!" Alice interrupts our reunion by slapping Jake on the arm. From the sound of the smack it made and Jake's wincing, I'm going to assume it wasn't just a little pat. "You ruin my plans by showing up here so unexpectedly and then you can't even stay put in the kitchen until your cue!"
"Calm down, Pixie-stick. I think Nes likes my version better." Jake grins at me, that warm, gorgeous smile that I've always adored. Jake has nicknames for everyone here. He calls Alice pixie-stick because she looks like a pixie and is so thin and tiny. Alice growls under her breath and stomps away, probably to go rant to poor Jasper.
"I can't believe you're here!" I tell Jake as soon as she leaves, placing my hands on both sides of his face as if to make sure he is real. I feel sort of bad because I haven't even thought of Jake recently.. He has slipped from my mind, like so many other things have, as I become more and more consumed with Alec.
"Like I'm going to miss the big one-six." He chuckles, grabbing one of my hands that is on his face and lacing his fingers through it.
"How long are you staying?" I ask while brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead.
"The most I can squeeze in is a week. Packs don't do so well when their alpha is away." he tells me with a sad smile. Jake hates the responsibilities that come with his position in the pack. He has never even wanted to be a wolf, never thought it was that cool like all the other guys did, he has always wanted to just be normal. And he could, if he stopped shifting and retired like many of his former pack members have – the ones I grew up around. But if he stops shifting then he starts aging. And I will soon stop aging. He shifts for me.
"I guess we're going to have to make the most of every minute then." I try to make his sadness disappear, squeezing his hand gently.
"I guess so." He squeezes mine back.
"Come on you two, I don't think Jasper will be able to handle it if you hurt Alice's plans again by making us late." Mom says, leaning against the far wall smiling at us. She loves seeing Jake and I together, seeing him so happy. She has hurt him severely in the past, but I mend that hurt. Because I am his imprint. I love Jake to death, but not in a romantic way. Not yet at least. And sometimes I wish he had never imprinted on me. It is so boring to know who you're going to be with from a young age. And it makes you feel guilty for having feelings about other guys... Like, a tall, handsome, dark-haired, green-eyed, hilarious, charming, romantic, sweet, mortal boy..
"Don't beat yourself up. It's normal." Dad whispers to me under his breath as we all head into the garage. He must have heard my Alec-thoughts. I nod at him with a small smile.
Since there is ten of us, we have to take separate cars, each couple taking a car. Jake and I ride in the back of Dad's Corvette with Mom sitting in the passenger's seat.
Jake and I play the stupid game we have since I was a kid – I spy. We sort of use it to compete in who has the better vision by spying things far off and seeing if the other can see far enough to guess it. His eyes aren't as great as a vampire's, and neither are mine, so we are pretty evenly matched.
The drive to Yamashiro, an Asian food restaurant in Hollywood, took about five hours with my family's reckless driving. The food was delicious, service was impeccable, and the scenery was remarkable.
We were there for about an hour and a half, and then headed back. It was around 8:30 when we got home. Usually we get back sooner, but we had to travel farther to get to a nice restaurant this year. We all pick up on the sound of a heartbeat and the smell of human as we begin twisting down the driveway.
"What the hell?" Jake asks, wondering what human would possibly venture to the Cullen mansion, especially at this time, when all trace of light has left the sky. Dad and I were the only ones who knew why there is a human here. Him because he is a mind-reader, and me because I would recognize that honeysuckle scent with a tinge of Old Spice cologne anywhere.
The headlights of our car illuminate Alec's face. I jump out of the car before we can reach the garage. Jake is about to follow me, but Dad stops him, telling him I need a moment, which I am thankful for. I don't think I'm ready to watch Jake and Alec meet yet – the one I'm destined to be with and the one I am falling in love with. It would be hard for reasons I can't really put into words.
Alec leaps to his feet as I come running towards him, looking excited though rather tired and weary. In his hand is a single rose. I am so happy to see him, if completely shocked, so I hug him as tightly as I can without hurting him. He seems pretty pumped to see me too because he twirls me in a circle just like Jake had earlier, but I like it better when Alec does. It feels much cuter and more romantic.
"What are you doing here?" I ask him as he sets me down and we release each other. The absence of his skin against mine leaves a cold, lonely feeling in its wake.
"You didn't come to school today, by the way thanks for the heads up," He frowns at me, "and I wasn't about to miss your birthday."
"It was a sort of spur of the moment thing, sorry. And that is so sweet. How long have you been here?"
"I called you a million times but your phone was off so I walked over at around four. And I thought I'd just wait it out. Fell asleep for an hour or two. I planned on leaving in about fifteen minutes, so really you have perfect timing." He grins loftily.
"My family and I went to eat in Hollywood. I didn't take my phone. And you've been out here for four and a half hours?" I exclaim, feeling horrible. He must be famished, parched, and tired.
"All in the name of love." He chuckles and my stomach flutters with butterflies. "Happy birthday, Carlie." He tells me, eyes turning serious yet affectionate and smile turning adoring while he extends the rose towards me.
I take it, my hand brushing against his lightly, and say, "This is so sweet."
"My mom grows them." He informs me, playing it off cool. Then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a scarlet velvet jewelery box and extends it to me. I take it curiously, opening it up to reveal ivory satin and a gorgeous bracelet. It is made of alternating faceted amethyst gemstones and small spheres of sterling silver. There is a small silver clasp, and opposite it, a large amethyst in the shape of a crystal. Alec grows antsy as I stare at it.
"I've seen you wear a lot of bracelets before, and purple is such a great color on you, and so I thought you might like it. You can take it back if you want, it won't hurt my feelings." He says non-chalantly, but I can tell it would hurt him. He put a lot of effort into finding this for me.
"It's beautiful, Alec. I love it." I look up at him, smiling.
"Good, because if you didn't, I would probably go home and cry." He bites his lip as he grins in a child-like manner. I laugh, and he gently takes the bracelet from the box. He grabs my left hand, the one that I don't wear Jake's promise bracelet on, and clasps it around my wrist. I twist my arm, watching the gems glisten in the porch light.
I look up at Alec, still smiling happily, and see that is staring at me with a mix of fondness, nervousness, and desire. My smile slips as his gaze begins to make me nervous also. After a moment, he takes a step towards me so there is no space between us, our bodies pressed together tightly and perfectly. My heart speeds up and I hear and feel his do the same.
"Look, Carlie, I'm sorry if I'm being too sudden, but we've known each other for a couple weeks now, and I haven't been able to get you out of my head from the first moment I saw you. You're puzzling, smart, insightful, kind-hearted, amusing, kind of strange, totally different, absolutely beautiful, and everything else that is wonderful and foreign to me. I have never felt this way about anyone before. I think I might be going insane, but I honestly don't care anymore." He laughs nervously, one hand running through his hair just like I knew it would.
"I'm not sure, but I think that might be the Alec-way of asking me out on a date?" My smile begins to return, my heart pounding faster than it ever has before as my knees go weak and I struggle to stand upright.
"Yeah," He laughs, "and that's just what I mean. When I'm around you, I lose every ounce of my cool and composure."
"I don't know if that's too tricky for anyone to do." I tease, while secretly thinking back to all the times we've been together. I've always thought he was the cool one while I was the babbling mess.
Alec rolls his eyes and asks hopefully, "So do I get an answer? Will you go on a date with me this Friday?"
"Of course." I say quietly, overcome by excitement and happiness. I can't believe I've only known Alec two weeks. It seems like it has been years.
Alec smiles, then leans down, eyes half-closed. I lean up to meet him, eyes closing and hands placed on either side of his throat while his encircle my waist. I expect an interruption; Dad coming out and yelling, Uncle Em doing some stupid prank, Alice bursting out and raving about how I'm messing with her schedule. But none of that happens. No interruptions this time.
Alec's cool, soft lips meet mine with an almost feverish longing. We've both been waiting for this moment for two weeks now. I relish in my first kiss, hoping it's not too obvious that I'm inexperienced. He pulls me as tight as he can to his body, so tight it almost became hard to distinguish where I ended and he began. As cliche as it might sound, sparks began to fly between our molded lips. I can feel his blood pumping through his veins, and the predator in me is urging me to take a sip. Just one little drink, it won't hurt him. A small taste.. I fight back the monster, reminding myself this is Alec. I can't hurt him. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. The thirst continues to scorch the back of my throat, but I try to ignore it and only think about the pleasure of his kiss.
My hands slip back into his hair, grabbing fistfuls and loving how silky soft it is. He pushes the back of my shirt up slightly so his hands can rest on my bare skin. I can tell this passionate kiss is about to take a lusty turn (major tongue involvement), when I feel myself being watched. I pull back reluctantly, and look up at the door to the house. Alec follows my gaze. We are met with the deeply-hurt, scarred, tortured, confused, and totally angered brown eyes of Jacob Black. His fists are clenched and he is shirtless with cut-off jeans on, prepared for the hunt we were about to go on, his stomach, chest, arm, and calf muscles displayed in copper perfection. A tremor ripples through his body, and I gulp nervously.
"Uh, who is that?" Alec whispers to me, not knowing Jake can hear every word.
"That's my best friend from my old school, Jacob." I tell him with an easy lie.
"The fact that you're lying about this guy really makes a blow to my self-esteem." Alec tells me with a small, toothless smile.
"I'm not lying." I insist, knowing it's no use with him. I pull my eyes away from Jake and look up at Alec.
"Okay, whatever. Considering I just got lucky enough to land a date with you, I don't think arguing what a tanned, buff, older, shirtless guy is doing in your house staring at me like he is going to murder me in my sleep is a very good approach. I'll just see you tomorrow at school, okay?" Alec smiles, playing things off cool, his specialty, while hiding the confusion and slight hurt.
"It's really not what it seems. And how are you getting home?" I ask him.
"It only takes fifteen minutes to walk." He says like it is the most obvious thing in the world.
"You are not walking home. It's cold out here and dark. My mom can drive you home." I grab his hand, twining my fingers through his, and beginning to pull him towards the door that Jake has disappeared from.
"Uh, I don't know if I want to go in there with that other guy in there.." Alec stammers nervously.
"It's okay, really. He's not bad. " I continue dragging him, opening the door and walking inside. My family had taken on their human roles, Alice obviously for-seeing that Alec would need a ride. Dad is playing the piano with Mom sitting next to him, Emmett is watching a football game on mute, Rose is painting Alice's toenails on the floor in front of the couch, Jasper is writing what looks like an essay, Carlisle is reading a medical book, and Esme is sticking candles in the cake. Jake is no where to be found.
"Wow.." Alec breathes, looking around at the cake and balloons and lit candles that decorate the room. The gifts have been stashed away, probably for looks. We're obviously wealthy, but that amount of presents is just really abnormal.
"Mom, Alec needs a ride home." I say as we enter the room. Mom's eyes flickered over to me before quickly looking away. Esme turns to me, putting on a warm smile for our guest.
"Oh, so you are Alec. It is so nice to finally meet you. I'm Carlie's mom, Esme." She tells him.
"It's a pleasure, ma'am." He says politely, the epitome of charm.
Carlisle stands up, walking over to Alec, smiling just as kindly as Esme. "I'm her father, Carlisle." He holds out his hand.
"Nice to meet you, sir." Alec shakes it, flinching from the cold just like he once did from my heat.
"Likewise." Carlisle says while releasing his hand. A few of my family members smile at Alec as he passes when we make our way into the garage. He smiles back sort of timidly, his instincts obviously telling him he should get out of here. He has just walked into a nest of vampires and is absolutely oblivious.
I'm pretty sure Alec nearly had a heart-attack when I flicked on the garage lights and dozens of shiny, expensive, sleek sports cars came into his view. He was practically drooling over Rose's Audi R8, so that's the one we took. As the engine purred and Esme maneuvered it out of the garage and down the driveway, Alec looked so in awe he could have died right then and been content.
"Please tell me you are getting a car like this." Alec says to me after driving smoothly for a minute.
"I don't know yet, but I'm assuming so." I tell him and he strokes the black leather seats.
"And I thought I was lucky to be getting my mom's old Honda Accord." He chuckles. Alec gives Esme directions for the rest of the time to his house.
When we arrive, he says to Esme, "Thanks for the ride, Mrs. Cullen."
"Call me Esme, dear." She smiles back at him. Esme and Arianna are a lot alike. I can't believe I just noticed that. Both maternal and caring, stern with their children, both have a need for cleanliness, and both enjoy gardening. I wonder if Arianna is as great of a cook as Esme.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Carlie." He says as he unbuckles his seat belt, then leans in quickly and kisses me sweetly and chastely on the lips, so quickly you would think the thirst wouldn't even have time to register, but it did, burning me and tempting my teeth to sink into his throat. He gets out, and the burst of cold air that floods the car isn't even enough to get rid of the sizzling heat that his lips left on mine but it does clear my head of the blood-lust. He jogs up to his house and we wait until he is safely inside before driving away.
Neither Esme nor I say anything for a minute but I finally have to break the silence. "Jake saw us. Alec and I. Kissing." I tell her shamefully.
"Yes, we all know, sweetheart. He ran off and wouldn't even listen to your mother." Esme says sadly. Jake has always looked to my mother has sort of a rock, someone to get advice from when all else fails. If he wouldn't even listen to her, I'm screwed.
"I feel horrible that I hurt him, but I don't regret kissing Alec. Why is that?" I ask her, seeking her excellent words of wisdom. Esme, with her caramel waves, knowing smile, and warm heart, always has the best advice.
"You love them both. You've loved Jake your whole life, you two have an imprint after all. But now he is ready to take your friendship to the next level and you just aren't prepared for that huge change. And while you're afraid of the turns in your relationship with Jacob, you're starting to develop strong feelings for Alec. It is obviously hard on you, we have all seen that. He is a mortal after all. Your father and mother are devastated that you seem to be slipping into the same tough situations they both were in but perhaps a bit worse considering you have an imprinter. This is going to be difficult, Renesmee. I love you like my own daughter, so I am not going to dilute the truth. Your life is about to take possibly the hardest turn you will ever have to deal with." She summarizes my life much, much, much better than I could have if I sat with a pen and paper for hours trying to come up with perfection. She nails things easily like that.
"When I first met Alec, I never thought I would be sucked in like this. But I can't get out now. I know it hasn't been long, but we just have this connection. I hate to say it, but it's like you and Carlisle. Or Dad and Mom. We just get each other, you know? And it's like that with me and Jake too, but I just see him as a brother. Nothing more. And with Alec...it's like purely romantic. Know what I mean?" I look up at her, wondering if I'm even being coherent. Sometimes my thoughts get scattered when Alec enters them.
She laughs quietly, pulling into the driveway as she says, "Yes, Nessie. I understand. And I know you will do what's right. You always do."
"Thanks, Esme. I don't say it to any of you enough, but I love you bunches." I smile and lean up and peck her cheek. She laughs.
"I love you too. Now hurry inside. You have school tomorrow and still need to take a shower and do a bit of homework if you know of any what you had today. And I'm sure Alice has a slice of cake waiting for you." Esme says as we pull into the garage.
I hop out of the car and run inside, finding my family in the living room. They've fallen out of their human charade, but I wish they hadn't. Now they all just sit scattered around the room, all silent, mulling over their own thoughts. I stand in the doorway to the living room, scared to breathe much less move.
Alice, of course, is the first to break the trance. She flits over to the cake and begins lighting candles as she says, "Renesmee, come on. I have a piece of cake with your name all over it. Literally."
I walk slowly over there as the last candle is lit. The rest of the family gathers, putting on a happy facade. I sit at the small table holding the cake and all the female vampires in the room snap pictures while singing Happy Birthday to me for the second time today. This time, everyone was obviously not into it at all. Emmett didn't even give us his famous big finish.
I close my eyes and make a wish before I blow out the candles. Please let me make the right decision when the time comes.
I blow on the candles and each flickers out. Alice cuts me a piece of cake, the one that has a fraction of my name on it in icing, and hands it to me along with a fork. My appetite is gone, but I begin to take small bites just to humor Alice.
After eating about half of it, I set it down on the glass coffee table by the sofa and look up at my family, who have all returned to their quiet contemplation.
"So are we just going to pretend nothing happened with Jake or maybe discuss it?" I ask a little rudely. I didn't mean to, it just came out wrong.
"What is there to discuss?" Dad asks.
"I don't know. Maybe where he went? Is he coming back? Is he okay? Does he hate me? Is Alec in any sort of danger?" Questions tumble from my mouth frantically.
Dad answers again, "He phased and just took off. None of us know where he is headed or when he'll be back. And he'll be okay in a while. He is just really hurt. And Emmett and Jasper and I will keep watch over Alec tonight and maybe we'll hear something from Jacob tomorrow."
"I didn't mean to hurt him," I whisper, tears filling my eyes, "I didn't even know he was there. But I'm not ready to give up Alec for Jake." I resolve myself, letting myself know I am not going to give in to guilt and lose Alec.
"We know, angel. We all know what you're feeling. It's okay, you'll do the right thing. We all know you will." Mom smiles sadly at me, sounding a lot like Esme.
I trudge upstairs, feeling rather miserable about this whole situation. I have no earthly idea what is going to become of my relationships with the two most important guys in my life. And my family all just know I'm going to do the right thing, but there really doesn't seem to be a right thing anymore.
A/N: Thanks for the reviews and favorites! They mean a lot! I didn't know if anyone would read this because it's kind of a different idea, Alec being human. But it seems I've got a few people liking it, and that is encouraging! Sorry for the late update, spring break has me busy!
I hope you all aren't mad that they have already come to a first date after only two weeks, but, hey, first dates happen way faster with a lot of real-world couples. And their relationship is going to develop pretty quickly from here.
Jake will be back, so don't get your hopes Sorry, I just can't stand the boy! But he is important in Renesmee's life, no use trying to change that fact. Oh, and Alec, perceptive boy that he is, will be quick at breaking apart Renesmee's secrets. You have been warned!
XOXO, JCBMA