Dave stood in front of the auditorium doors. It was now or never. He needed to go in there. He needed to do it. The last time he saw Kurt face-to-face, he told him he didn't know if he was gay. He told him to go to PFLAG meetings. He was lying under threat. This time, though. This time would be his time.
Dave pushed open the auditorium doors and walked in, his guitar slumped over his back in its case. He glanced at Santana who was frowning in confusion. He broke the gaze because he could feel about 12 other pairs of eyes on him.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Sam said, frowning. "We've got the auditorium to practice."
Dave tried to find his voice. He glanced at Santana and then back at the others. "Um—"
"You are wasting our precious time." Rachel said, her jaw clenched. "We are running on a tight practicing schedule."
"Yeah, just take Santana and leave." Finn said.
"I'll give you five minutes. No more." Rachel said, looking at her watch and walking briskly away.
"No, I'm not here for Santana at all." Dave murmured. He cleared his throat and tried to speak strongly. "I'm here to apologize."
"You already did apologize." Puck said, shaking his head.
"Yeah, but I was threatened. I didn't really think you guys bought it anyway." Dave shrugged. "And… I'm here to… apologize… to Kurt."
Everyone's eyebrows raised and looked at a pleasantly shocked Kurt. He saw Dave. It was times like this that blew Dave away. When Kurt Hummel graced his eyes upon his face. When Kurt Hummel took time out of his gazing schedule to notice Dave's existence.
"You… already apologized. And I forgave you, remember?"
"I apologized for pushing you around, calling you names and stuff." He took a deep breath and found Kurt's eyes again. "I didn't apologize for everything." A flash of several emotions played on Kurt's face—confusion, fear, understanding and acceptance—Dave could read Kurt like a book.
"Okay." Kurt said. They all stood there awkwardly in silence before Dave said,
"Could you all… get off the stage?"
"You're going to sing to Kurt?" Finn asked.
Dave's cheeks flushed but he fought to keep it contained. "That's what Santana said you all did." He murmured. Kurt's face, again—confusion, amusement, acceptance. Kurt walked off of the stage without another word and sat, third row in, in the audience. The rest of the club followed Kurt into the audience and sat spottily around him.
"Okay so… the verses aren't talking to you…they're about me. And the chorus… is… it's to you…so… yeah." Dave said. The butterflies in his stomach were turning into tiny dogs, gnawing him from the inside out. He unzipped his guitar and put it on. He started to strum softly.
Weep for yourself my man,
You'll never be what is in your heart…
Weep little lion man,
You're not as brave as you were at the start…
He closed his eyes and mustered every ounce of confidence he had and his voice grew stronger.
Rate yourself and rake yourself
Take all of the courage you have left.
And waste it on fixing all the problems you have made in your own head.
Dave look to the audience and found Kurt's blue eyes as he sung. No one else mattered.
But it was not your fault but mine.
And it was your heart on the line.
I really fucked it up this time
Didn't I my dear?
Didn't I my…
Kurt's eyes were wide in shock. He was shocked at something, he looked so sad and relieved and shocked—Dave just played, tearing his eyes away from the crystalline pools of blue that were Kurt's eyes.
Tremble for yourself, my man
You know that you have seen this all before
Tremble little lion man,
You'll never settle any of your scores
Your grace is wasted in your face
Your boldness stands alone among the wreck
Now learn from your mother or else spend your days biting your own neck.
He didn't want to meet Kurt's eyes again. He wanted to stop here. He didn't want to finish, but he had to. He met Kurt's eyes again. He was no longer shocked, his mouth in a sad smile, his eyes brimming with tears.
But it was not your fault, but mine.
And it was your heart on the line.
I really fucked it up this time
Didn't I my dear?
Didn't I my dear.
This song was perfect. When he heard it, he was afraid that Mumford and Sons were watching him from a distance. He felt this way, exactly. He acted this tough guy on the outside, this strong, unbreakable man, when really he was just a little lion man, feigning bravery. Dave opened his mouth and sang as strong as he had ever sung in his life. It echoed around the auditorium, just his voice and his guitar, it rang in the rafters, it shook in the people in front of him. Kurt stood slowly.
But it was not your fault, but mine.
And it was your heart on the line.
I really fucked it up this time
Didn't I my dear?
Kurt made his way slowly up to the stage, his face blotchy and red. He grew level with Dave as Dave closed the song, softer, the guitar forgotten, just as smooth and full of emotion as ever.
But it was not your fault, but mine.
And it was your heart on the line.
I really fucked it up this time
Didn't I my dear?
Dave hesitated, drinking in every inch of Kurt's face before he whispered,
Didn't I my… dear.
Dave felt a tear run down his cheek. He hated it when they did that. He felt the tears, but he wanted to ignore them, he wanted to forget that sadness existed and just live forever in Kurt's eyes but he was snapped back to semi-reality when the tear fell down his face. Kurt's face ran through emotions again—happiness, confusion, back to happiness, but it landed on bloodlust anger. Before he knew it, Kurt pushed him. Dave frowned in confusion, but didn't fight back. Kurt was sobbing and pushing Dave.
"See?" He choked. "You can take it." Dave nodded. He would never again lay a hand on Kurt Hummel as long as he lived.
"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I'm sorry."
"I forgive you." Kurt said. "I just… I've wanted to do that for years. Years."
"You can slushie me if you want."
"No." Kurt said, wiping his eyes. "I got all I wanted out. I… I should've seen it… I should've helped. I'm sorry that I didn't help… I just—"
Dave shook his head and sung softly, "But it was not your fault, but mine." He took a tiny step towards Kurt. "And it was your heart on the line."
Kurt chuckled sadly, covering his face with his hands. He peeked over his fingers at Dave whose stomach swooped with happiness. "I need to talk to you… and… I don't think you'd like it if I… said everything I wanted to say in front of them." He murmured. Dave turned quickly to remember that the rest of the glee club was there. He caught Santana's eyes. She was silently allowing tears to fall down her cheeks. He glanced at all of the shocked faces in the small crowd.
"Join Glee." Rachel said simply, in awe. "Join this glee club." Once she said that the rest of them got started.
"Oh my god, man your voice is incredible. Great song choice." Sam said.
"You really need to join glee." Said Mike.
"You don't even know dude. I would totally go gay for your voice." Puck said. "sing something else.
Dave blushed from Puck's comment and shook his head. He hadn't been expecting them to actually like his singing.
"No…" he said. "I was just here to apologize to Kurt."
"C'mon man, we need you." Artie said. "Your voice is deep and gravelly, and we don't have one of those."
"Seriously."
"Yeah."
"Dave." Santana said, leaning forward. "You need us. You need them. They can help you." She breathed. "Please join. Please."
"No! No…" Dave said, backing away nervously. "I'm not even that good of a singer—" Everyone freaked out all at once.
"Are you joking?"
"That has to be a joke."
"Your voice is amazing, bro!"
"It is imperative that you join glee club. We need to succeed at nationals and I can't leave a voice like that in Lima, Ohio."
Kurt caught Dave's elbow and pulled him silently backstage, out of earshot.
The rest of the glee club sat there in confusion for a little bit before the questions started leaking out.
"What's going on between Kurt and Karofsky?" Finn asked, frowning. "I mean, something's been up with Karofsky for a long time."
"Yeah, I've noticed that too." Sam muttered. He turned to Puck. "Do you know what's up with him?"
"Nope." Puck said shrugging. Everyone shook their heads in confusion.
"Santana, do you know what's up with him?" Quinn asked. Santana crossed her arms and stared pointedly at the stage.
"Santana, what's wrong with Karofsky?" Rachel asked.
"It's none of your businesses." She glared at the glee club. "He wanted to come here to apologize to Kurt. That's all."
"Is he abused?" Mercedes asked.
"Are his parents getting a divorce?"
"Did someone die?" "Is he in… like… my situation?" Sam muttered.
"Look." Santana said. "I don't understand why there's a third degree here. What's wrong with him is his business, and his business only."
"Just answer us this, Santana. Is he sad?" Rachel asked. Santana looked over at Rachel, her eyes filled with concern that was unexpected of Rachel. Santana sighed and muttered.
"Extremely."
"And you and Kurt are trying to help him, right?"
"Yes." Santana said, tensing her jaw. "He needs to join glee club. You guys need to get him to join. I don't know if Kurt and I are going to be able to talk him into it. Don't be hostile towards him. He needs to join this club."
"Why?" Sam said, frowning. Santana swallowed as she tried to keep back the biting tears. She stood up and made to leave.
"Just… trust me."