A/N: Good morning/afternoon/evening wherever you are, I hope your day is wonderful. Not much to say, life here is good. I have my little beauty sleeping in my arms (I typed about the last 500 words with one hand...that's how determined I was to finish this chapter!) Hope you like, there was lots to fill in. I even allowed myself a little Carlisle love. I do so enjoy letting him get all fatherly and concerned. Reviews are wonderful, so sorry I haven't been able to respond to them all personally like I used to. Aubrey's nap times are short, and I figured you'd all rather have me spend the time writing, but know that I read and appreciate them all!!!

Thanks also to shasta53 for helping with editing (me and OpenOffice are going to have a comma debate later...). Now go find a movie that doesn't make you need to bleach your brain. :)

Temper – EPOV

I knew Bella was going to be angry. I knew there was nothing I could say or do that would make her understand why I felt the need to take the precautions I was. I knew it, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to try everything in my power to make it up to her. That was why I was currently tucking bedding into an elaborately decorated bed, hoping she would be comfortable during her nights in my room, and that even in her anger, she might dream of me while I was away.

It was Thursday afternoon, and everything was set. All the things Bella would need were here, and Alice was officially on duty, ready to entertain and distract Bella as only she could. I'd been instructed to keep my cell phone turned off until I was already on my way home. Alice was persistent in her assurance that nothing would happen, and didn't want me wasting another hunting trip worrying about what was going on at home.

I obeyed diligently at first, but of course my nerves eventually got the better of me. When my family and I reached the edge of the California reserve, I turned my phone back on and saw I had two new messages. With a deep breath – and a reproachful glare from Jasper and Emmett – I ducked away to find out whether yet another weekend would have to be cut short.

"You are in trouble," Bella's voice spat from the recording. "Enormous trouble. Angry grizzly bears are going to look tame next to what is waiting for you at home."

A wide grin spread across my face. I hated that she was mad at me, but at least she was safe. There was also the fact that Bella was really adorable when she was trying to sound threatening. Next was a message from Alice that also made me smile.

"She's fine, Edward. Don't you trust your little sister? Now put your phone away and go hunt or I'll call Jazz and have him throw it into the lake."

As I was tucking the phone, still turned on, back into my pocket, I heard Jasper's voice behind me.

"She's not kidding," he said with a smirk.

"Fine," I sighed, turning it off reluctantly. I was about to protest, but fortunately at that moment, I caught the scent of a pair of mountain lions. I took off running, Jasper right behind me, and for a short time, the world and all my worries disappeared.

A few hours later, when my thirst was satisfied, reality started coming back to me. I worried about Bella, though I knew if I made any attempt to check my phone, it would be out of my hand and at the bottom of the lake in seconds. Trying to distract myself from what was presently going on, I started thinking once again about Bella's refusal to my proposal, and what it would mean for our future if I were to ask her again properly only to have her deny me a second time.

I knew we were from two completely different times. I understood that she was young, and scared. Logically, I could tell myself it made sense for her to be unready for such a huge, life-changing decision. The problem, however, was that she was so ready to throw away her humanity, and bind herself to this existence forever. That, compared to marriage, was a far greater commitment. It was making me start to doubt.

Was it possible that her desire to join our family was less about me and more about her glorified idea of immortality? She'd always shown an unnatural fascination with our way of life. Maybe I'd been flattering myself assuming I was the only reason. Hadn't humans always searched for eternal youth and a way to live forever?

I don't know how long I'd been frozen, staring off at nothing, but eventually Carlisle approached me and asked if there was anything I wanted to talk about. Jasper and Emmett had taken off after a family of grizzlies, and it was the first time on the trip we'd been alone. Though most of the time Carlisle spoke to me like an equal – a friend, a brother – there were times his voice took on a distinctly fatherly tone. In those times particularly, his love and concern for me were obvious, and I found myself speaking to him exactly as I imagined a son would to his father.

"I'm not sure where to begin," I said dismally.

"You looked like you were somewhere very far away. At first I assumed you were simply worrying about Bella, but then it started to look like something more. You know you can tell me anything, and I'll help in any way I can."

I hadn't intended to discuss it, but the words were out before I knew I was speaking.

"I asked Bella to marry me," I said softly, unsure of what his reaction would be. Really though, I shouldn't have been surprised.

"I know. Alice mentioned it."

"Of course she did," I said, feeling slightly embarrassed that more people knew about my ridiculous spontaneous proposal. Though he didn't say a word, I suddenly felt the need to defend myself. "That wasn't how it was supposed to happen. I'm planning on asking her again, properly this time."

"I know, and I'm sure it will be perfect. I also have no doubt that your love and devotion to Bella were apparent in your first attempt, even though the circumstances were not what you'd intended. I'm actually wondering right now if you aren't concerned over the wrong thing."

"What do you mean?"

"What I mean is, it seems you're in a bit of a paradox. You're fighting so hard to keep Bella human, mortal, yet you expect her to pledge herself to you forever. You're offering Bella eternity, while simultaneously trying to keep her from it. Surely you can understand her hesitation."

"But I was agreeing to her condition. I was doing the unthinkable and offering to change her myself."

"You weren't happy about it."

"Of course I wasn't. I could never take her life from her gladly, willingly."

"And she knew that. You just said that the proposal wasn't how you'd intended it. If she'd accepted under those circumstances, she knows you would have spent the duration of your engagement buying yourself more time. She would have seen how miserable it was making you, and known that she was causing your unhappiness. She deserves more than that, doesn't she?"

There was something off about his voice, and I eyed him curiously. "Has Alice seen that?" I hedged, and he glanced toward the ground. "Does Alice see her saying yes and then worrying about me and my end of the bargain?"

He looked back up at me with a new severity in his eyes.

"Just promise me that when the time comes, you'll remember that she's making sacrifices for you, too. Nothing about this situation you two have found yourselves in should be taken lightly. Make sure you both know what you truly want, and what you're willing to give up. There's no sense in making each other miserable, agreeing to things you're not okay with"

I was about to ask for a slightly less cryptic explanation, but stopped when I heard Emmett's booming voice through the clearing.

"Are you guys still talking?" he called. Jasper came up behind him, laughing, and I realized their side trip had a secondary purpose. "Come on. More feast, less chatter," he said as Carlisle threw one more meaningful glance in my direction. Why did it suddenly feel like everyone else knew more than me?

We stayed out hunting all night, and well into the next day. When the sun started to set, we decided to head home, and as soon as we were running, my hand instinctively reached for my phone. I looked over at Jasper who rolled his eyes.

Yes, you can check in now. Seriously, though, you have got to learn to relax.

I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw there were no new messages. I started to dial Alice's number to let her know we were on our way, when it started ringing.

"Don't be upset," Alice said before I'd even gotten out my "hello." Without thinking, I sped up my pace.

"What happened?" I asked anxiously.

"Bella's completely fine – "

"Yes, she is," I interrupted, my nerves making me more irritable than I probably should have been. "You've been with her the whole time as promised, right?"

"Mostly," she said guiltily, then her own irritation became apparent. "I swear that girl is pushing my level of patience to its breaking point. You thought you were close to crossing the line?"

"She went back to La Push again? How?"

"Well, I guess I can't place all the blame on Bella. That mongrel showed up at school on a motorcycle and caught her off guard. I'd like to think she wouldn't have gone if she'd taken the time to think about how much it would upset both of us. But I think we both know that's probably not the case."

"Where is she now?" I growled.

"Relax. She's up in your room." Strangely, it sounded like she was smiling.

"Alice?"

"She wouldn't talk to me about it, but when she got back, she was looking less than thrilled about her little visit. I don't know what he did or said to her, but something tells me she won't be running off again any time soon."

As I let that sink in, my mood grew perceptibly lighter. Maybe there wasn't anything I could say to convince Bella to stay away from the wolves, but with their volatile nature and short tempers, I should have known it was only a matter of time before Jacob sabotaged himself. I was almost afraid to think of what could have happened, but I convinced myself that since Bella was safe, it really didn't matter. I would simply hope that whatever it was had made enough of an impact on her, I would no longer have to bribe Alice with trinkets while I was away.

"We'll be home soon," I told Alice, now smiling like I was sure she was.

"She'll be waiting," she said simply, and the phone clicked to silence. My pace grew impossibly faster as I thought of Bella, lying in bed, in my room.

What's the big hurry? Emmett thought as he struggled to keep up with me. Bella in trouble again?

"No," I said, still grinning. "She went to La Push, but came back on her own, and apparently quite upset."

That wolf of hers in an idiot.

"We already knew that," I grinned. "I'm just looking forward to finding out exactly how big of one he is."

I couldn't help but speculate about what Jacob or his pack had done, but since there was no way to know, I tried to put it out of my mind. Instead, I focused on what Carlisle had said earlier, as well as all of Alice's previous warnings to not try to make Bella's choices for her. If I was ever going to expect her to accept a marriage proposal from me, I knew I was going to have to start compromising.

It was still too difficult to think about willingly changing her, but there was one compromise I was starting to feel a bit more capable of making. Though I didn't yet have the details, clearly Bella was more than able to take herself away from a situation she didn't feel comfortable with. I could never trust the wolves, but perhaps it was time I tried having a little more faith in Bella. Maybe it was because a part of me wanted to believe she had no intention of going back to La Push, or it might have been a simple desire to end the fight we'd had so many times, but whatever the reason, I was finding myself more and more okay with the idea of not interfering with her visits.

Anxious to discuss it with Bella, I kept my quick pace and beat everyone home. I heard Alice's melancholy thoughts coming from the garage as I neared the house, and decided to check in with her first. I didn't want her thinking I was upset with her for having let Bella get away. It wasn't her fault. And though it was hard to believe, some good may have come from the incident.

"I'm not going to take the car away," I said as I entered the garage. She smiled widely at me just as my gaze drifted toward the motorcycle that sat in the corner. Her face went stoic as my eyes widened.

Would you rather he'd brought her home on his bike? she argued.

I sighed. "Of course not. Anyway, it doesn't matter, right? She's home safely."

"Exactly."

"Did she ever tell you what upset her?"

"No, she went straight up to your room and hasn't left all night."

"Thank you, Alice."

"For what?"

"For being concerned. And for doing everything in your power to keep her safe. I know it's not easy when she gets mixed up with the wolves. I understand how frustrating this weekend must have been for you. I want you to know I'm going to try my best not to ask anything like this of you again. I'm hoping there won't be a need at all, but if she does decide to forgive whatever happened down there, I'm going to attempt to stay out of it next time."

"Wow. Do you really think you'll be able to do that?"

"I have to try. I can't keep letting this come between Bella and I."

Alice nodded in approval, though her thoughts were as wary as mine.

I went inside, hurrying up the stairs toward my room, but was stopped in my tracks as I passed Rosalie and Emmett's room. Rose was waiting for Emmett to get home, and while she was as anxious as usual for his return, her primary thoughts were of something completely different.

I've done everything I can. If she's stupid enough not to listen, it's her own fault. Can't blame me if she's miserable for eternity. No one can ever say I didn't warn her.

I wasn't surprised. Most of what she was thinking were things I'd grown used to since Bella had made her choice clear. Rose didn't agree, because if it had been up to her, she never would have chosen this life. I was about to walk away and leave her to her musings, when an unexpected thought found its way into the mix.

Of course she's not thinking about children now. She's still a child herself. But she's an idiot for thinking Edward will always be enough for her.

I stopped, stunned. Though Rosalie's thoughts occasionally betrayed her normally secret desire to have a child, I hadn't realized she was worried that Bella would have the same regrets. It made sense, and of course I'd had that fear myself – it was just one more thing I'd be denying Bella by agreeing to take her life – but it was still strange to hear that particular concern come from Rose.

I felt somehow more voyeuristic than normal, listening to such private thoughts, so I quickly made my way up to my room and searched the bed for Bella's sleeping form, only to find it empty. I was surprised to hear her heart and breath coming from the couch I'd pushed aside. She was buried beneath the comforter I'd picked out, curled up in what I could only assume was defiance of my gift. I scooped her up gently in my arms and carried her over to the bed. She could be mad at me if she wanted, but there was no sense in her making herself uncomfortable, simply to prove a point.

I wrapped her up in the blankets and laid down beside her, happy when she unconsciously curled her body close to mine. She sighed in her sleep, her mouth twitching into an almost smile as she rested her cheek against my chest. I listened to her quiet, steady breaths, completely content, until she eventually turned away from me. It was as if even in sleep she was debating whether or not to forgive me.

I listened to her sleep, hoping she might give me some clue as to what had happened in La Push, but she remained silent. Curiosity was getting the better of me, yet I knew after she woke up, I wouldn't make any attempt to get her to talk until she was ready. For now, I would simply focus on the fact that she was here, safe, and at home with me. I only hoped her anger with me wouldn't hinder us from celebrating that fact.

It was something I'd longed for many times while I lay holding her in her room. It wasn't that I minded us staying there every night, but sometimes it was unsettling, knowing Charlie was so nearby, and blissfully unaware that his daughter no longer slept alone. Here in my house we didn't have to talk softly, or make sure I was gone by a certain time. She could wake up in my arms and let me hold her for as long as we wanted. I could sing to her while we watched the sun come up. It was everything I wanted, and not just for one night, but for every night.

I was once again reminded of all the reasons I wanted to make her my wife. There had never been anyone else and there would never be anyone else. Bella had given me a reason to exist, and I wanted her beside me every minute of every day. Even though the idea of what forever meant for her humanity terrified me, it was in every other way exactly what I'd wanted. Just as Carlisle had said, I'd found myself in a paradox, longing for the very thing I was so determined not to have.

After several hours lost in my own very confusing thoughts, Bella started to stir. She was was facing me again, though she was still on the opposite side of the bed. I was respecting the distance she'd put between us, though I wanted nothing more than to pull her into my embrace and never let go. She stretched and turned her body away, toward the window, then back back again before opening her eyes. I could see her perfectly, though I doubted she could even make out my shape in the darkness.

"Sorry," I whispered, not wanting to startle her. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Her hands fumbled toward me, and I reached my own out until she grasped them tightly and pulled herself close. She seemed to still be half asleep and I was waiting for her to remember her anger at any moment. Hoping to keep it at bay a little while longer, I hugged her to me and rocked her against my chest.

She began slowly kissing my throat and I nearly laughed as a shiver of pleasure washed over me. I'd been expecting her fury, and instead I was greeted with her soft, warm breath and loving kisses. Certainly I deserved none of it.

She continued kissing my face until her lips met my own, and it was like coming home. Nothing on Earth compared to that feeling. It almost made going away worth it if I was welcomed back like this. I reveled in the way she sighed and leaned into me, like she couldn't get close enough. It was the way I felt every time we were together.

When I finally made myself pull away, I laughed softly.

"I was all braced for the wrath that was going to put grizzlies to shame, and this is what I get? I should infuriate you more often."

"Give me a minute to work up to it," she said, barely parting her lips from mine.

"I'll wait as long as you want," I said, just as unwilling as she was to allow any space between us. I held her close, loving the way her body fit perfectly against mine, and yet it still felt like we weren't close enough. My fingers reached up to tangle in her hair and I felt myself struggling not to hold her too tightly. Then I realized I wasn't the only one getting caught up in the moment

"Maybe in the morning," she nearly gasped.

"Whatever you prefer."

"Welcome home. I'm glad you came back," she said as I trailed kissed down her cheek and along her jaw. Her words only served to remind me where we were – we were home, both of us, together. I loved the way it sounded.

"That's a very good thing," I murmured, wondering if she knew what she was doing to me. I'd never fully realized exactly how much it meant to me to have her home with me. When I was at her house, I was a guest. When she was here, it was like she was where she'd always belonged. Bella had made no secret of how comfortable she felt in my house, and my family had already welcomed her in completely. All I wanted was to make it official, make her mine – my family – for all time.

As she hummed and sighed, breathing against my neck, all my well thought out restraint seemed to vanish. I could never hold her too tight – there was no such thing. We could never be too close – I would never get enough of her. I ached to be closer, even now as we were molded together, and I soon found my hand idly tracing down her arm, brushing her side and eliciting a slight shiver from her. I continued my path across her waist and down her leg until I was holding her calf in my hand. Without thinking, I pulled her leg up around me, the warmth of her body assaulting me as her breath caught. For an instant, I felt myself losing control, but I couldn't make myself care.

As my hand desperately held her to me, I forced myself to regain a measure of control. I smirked as my mouth found its way to her throat. It used to be only her blood that called to me, and now her entire body was testing me in new and wonderful ways. I forced my hand to relax so I didn't accidentally bruise her, then whispered against her skin.

"Not to bring on the ire prematurely, but do you mind telling me what it is about this bed that you object to?"

I quickly but cautiously rolled to one side and lifted Bella onto me, eager to feel her warmth against every inch of me. Her hair fell in long sweeps around her, and I held my hands on either side of her face in such a way that allowed me to continue kissing her throat. Her heart was racing and her breathing erratic, which only seemed to encourage me.

"The bed?" I repeated, smiling at her apparent inability to find words. "I think it's nice."

"It's unnecessary," she breathed as I guided her lips back to mine. She kissed me feverishly and in that instant, I wanted more than anything to feel her heart beating beneath me.

Slowly, gently, I rolled her over onto her back and positioned myself above her.

"That's debatable," I laughed softly. "This would be difficult on a couch."

Every second, I was carefully calculating how much weight I could put on her without hurting her. I could feel the heat radiating from her skin and her heart pounding under my chest. I wanted more, but how far could I push myself? I was already worried about crushing her, and I didn't dare hold her any tighter than I already was. I was overcome with a desire to taste her, and while that should have terrified me, I instead felt myself pressing my lips to hers again, then softly tracing them with the tip of my tongue. It was magnificent, and I began wondering why we'd never been like this before.

"Did you change your mind?" she asked.

Oh, right, that's why. I felt instantly remorseful as I realized I'd given her the wrong idea. If she knew how difficult it was to restrain myself, how my muscles were nearly trembling from having to hold back the strength with which I wanted to hold onto her, she wouldn't ask such a question. But she didn't know, or didn't fully understand, and I couldn't really expect her to. While she'd seen my strength on rare occasions, like so long ago in our meadow, she'd always believed my love for her would keep me from ever harming her. I wanted with everything in me to believe that, but her life was too precious to take such a risk.

I sighed, bracing myself for the disappointment I knew was I about to ignite in her, as I rolled us back onto our sides.

"Don't be ridiculous, Bella. I was just trying to illustrate the benefits of the bed you don't seem to like. Don't get carried away."

"Too late," she said softly, breaking my heart. How I longed to give her everything. "And I like the bed," she added, forcing a smile.

"Good," I said, returning her smile and pressing my lips to her forehead. "I do, too."

"But I still think it's unnecessary. If we're not going to get carried away, what's the point?"

I let out a long, deep breath, cursing myself for having let things go this far. She had too difficult a time drawing lines that needed to be drawn.

"For the hundredth time, Bella – it's too dangerous."

"I like danger," she said stubbornly. Instantly, I was reminded of her trips to La Push, and her naivety when it comes to her own safety. "I'll tell you what's dangerous," she continued. "I'm going to spontaneously combust one of these days – and you'll have no one but yourself to blame."

I knew she was trying to make a joke, but the guilt of the situation was getting to me and I reluctantly started to push her away.

"What are you doing?" she asked, holding onto me.

"Protecting you from combustion. If this is too much for you..."

"I can handle it," she said, wiggling her way back into my embrace. It probably wasn't smart, but I couldn't make myself fight her on it. Once I was holding her again, feeling her relax into me, I realized that even when I frustrated her, she would rather be close than have me pull away. It was a comforting feeling.

"I'm sorry I gave you the wrong impression," I apologized. "I didn't mean to make you unhappy. That wasn't nice."

"Actually, it was very, very nice," she said slyly, her breath warming my icy skin. She was going to be my undoing. I felt that earlier sense of longing starting to take hold of me again, a desire, a need to be closer. Not wanting to blur the lines again, I took a breath to steady myself.

"Aren't you tired?" I asked, hoping futilely to distract her. "I should let you sleep."

"No, I'm not. I don't mind if you want to give me the wrong impression again."

"That's probably a bad idea. You're not the only one who gets carried away."

"Yes, I am," she muttered, scowling. If only she knew, I thought, laughing under my breath.

"You have no idea, Bella. It doesn't help that you are so eager to undermine my self-control, either."

"I'm not going to apologize for that."

"Can I apologize?" I asked, more than ready to change the subject. It was yet another argument that tended to go in circles with us, and I was looking forward to addressing the one that may have finally found its resolve.

"For what?"

"You were angry with me, remember?"

"Oh, that," she said, frowning slightly.

"I'm sorry. I was wrong. It's much easier to have the proper perspective when I have you safely here." She smiled as I hugged her tighter. "I go a little berserk when I try to leave you. I don't think I'll go so far again. It's not worth it."

If there was any anger left in her, it disappeared with those words.

"Didn't you find any mountain lions?" she asked, grinning.

"Yes, I did, actually. Still not worth the anxiety. I'm sorry I had Alice hold you hostage, though. That was a bad idea."

"Yes," she said simply.

"I won't do it again," I promised.

"Okay. But slumber parties do have their advantages..." she smiled, pressing herself against me and kissing my neck.

"Mmm, I may take you up on that," I sighed, momentarily forgetting why stopping her was necessary. My head felt cloudy as her breath washed over me and my resolve started to waver.

"So is it my turn now?" she asked, pulling me abruptly from my wandering thoughts.

"Your turn?"

"To apologize."

"What do you have to apologize for?" I'd been expecting her to be furious with me, and instead I'd been met with nothing but understanding and affection. In my joy, it hadn't occurred to me that she was expecting me to be upset with her.

"Aren't you mad at me?" she asked, confused.

"No."

"Didn't you see Alice when you got home?" she asked, as if I was missing something obvious.

"Yes – why?"

"Are you going to take her Porsche back?"

Then I understood. Bella knew the exact details of our arrangement and she assumed I would accuse Alice of not upholding her part of the deal. Even if that were the case – and truthfully, I didn't blame Alice in the least – what would I gain by taking away something Alice loved? Honestly, I was going to buy it for her anyway. I would owe her for all eternity for bringing Bella to me in Volterra.

"Of course not," I assured her. "It was a gift."

"Don't you want to know what I did?" she asked.

Of course I did. It had been driving me crazy since I'd spoken to Alice on the phone. Still, I only wanted to know if Bella was ready to talk about it. I tried my best to appear nonchalant.

"I'm always interested in everything you do – but you don't have to tell me unless you want to."

"But I went to La Push," she said sheepishly.

"I know."

"And I ditched school."

"So did I."

I was determined not to allow her a moment of guilt over what had happened. It was over and done, and no harm had come from it. It had very possibly even given her a glimpse of what I'd been warning her about, and made her reluctant to return.

It looked like she was staring straight at me, though I wondered if her eyes had adjusted to the darkness yet. The way her fingers were searching the lines of my face made me feel like she was using them to try to read my expression.

"Where did all this tolerance come from?" she asked skeptically.

I felt remorseful yet again. I truly had been a tyrant, I thought with a sigh.

"I decided that you were right. My problem before was more about my...prejudice against werewolves than anything else. I'm going to try to be more reasonable and trust your judgment. If you say it's safe, then I'll believe you."

Please say you don't think it's safe and that you're never going back...

"Wow."

I felt my heart sink. As I waited hopefully for her to tell me the words I longed to hear – she'd had enough, she understood why it was best to stay away – I struggled to remember that even if she hadn't changed her mind, there was another reason for my compromise.

"And...most importantly...I'm not willing to let this drive a wedge between us."

Without another word, she laid her head back down on my chest, and I could feel her breathing steady. She was happy, and I had to believe that was all that mattered.

"So," I said, casually starting to fish for the most crucial piece of the puzzle. "Did you make plans to go back to La Push again soon?"

She didn't speak, and I could hear her heart start to speed up again. She didn't want to say the words out loud. I suddenly felt foolish to have thought that one bad day was enough to keep her from Jacob. Once again, I'd underestimated the place he had in her life.

Not wanting her to think I was going back on my words, I quickly added, "Just so that I can make my own plans. I don't want you to feel like you have to hurry back because I'm sitting around waiting for you."

"No," she said, a touch of sadness apparent in her tone. "I don't have plans to go back."

The curiosity was getting to me, but I didn't want to push her. I was honestly so thrilled to hear she wasn't planning a return trip, I didn't care if she kept the reason from me forever.

"Oh. You don't have to do that for me," I offered, though I knew it wasn't about me.

"I don't think I'm welcome anymore," she said, her voice soft and almost shaking. I was taken aback. I'd been assuming from Alice's description Bella had left because she was upset and wanted to get away. It never occurred to me she no longer felt wanted there.

"Did you run over someone's cat?" I teased, now wondering what she could have done to wear out her welcome. As far as I'd seen, Jacob was borderline obsessed with having her around.

"No," she said dismally. "I thought Jacob would have realized...I didn't think it would surprise him." She paused, as if what she was about to say was causing her physical pain. I was overcome with a sinking feeling, understanding what she meant before she'd finished explaining. "He wasn't expecting...that it was so soon."

"Ah," I breathed. Of course it made sense that Jacob would have gotten angry with her, when forced to think about her transformation. It was difficult for me to think about it, and it meant I got to be with her forever. How much more painful must it be for him? It means the end of whatever relationship they have – the end of hope.

He must have lashed out at her, though I assume he was still managing to hold onto enough control that it was only verbal. Though a part of me hated to admit it, I'd seen the purity of how Jacob cared for her. It would take a lot more than that to anger him enough to phase and risk hurting her. I watched Bella closely, her eyes close to tears, wondering what he'd said to cause her so much grief.

"He said he'd rather see me dead," she finally said. Her voice cracked, her expression cold and miserable. Although I thought I'd feel nothing but grateful for whatever Jacob had done to push her away, in that instant I could only hate him for causing her such pain. I wanted to rip him apart for being so selfish, so infantile.

I pulled Bella close, holding her and trying to make the agony go away.

"I'm so sorry," I breathed, pressing my lips to the top of her head.

"I thought you'd be glad." There was a hint of bitterness in her voice, though I couldn't tell if it was directed at myself or Jacob.

"Glad over something that hurt you? I don't think so Bella."

I could feel some of the tension in her body dissipate as she nuzzled closer to me, seemingly relieved by my response, though I couldn't imagine how she could have thought any differently. Did she really think me selfish enough to wish that kind of pain on her, simply to rid myself of that cretin? I could think of a much better way to rid us of him entirely, but I doubted if Bella could ever be that angry with him.

"What's wrong?" she asked, pulling me from that thought – which was probably a good thing.

"It's nothing," I said, not wanting to upset her further.

"You can tell me."

I debated, curious what her reaction would be. "It might make you angry," I warned.

"I still want to know."

I sighed. She left me no choice. Bella was never very good at letting things go.

"I could quite literally kill him for saying that to you. I want to."

To my great surprise, she laughed, though I could tell she was slightly uncomfortable. I hoped she knew me well enough to know I would never act on the thought – at least, not without her permission.

"I guess it's a good thing you've got so much self-control."

"I could slip," I offered. Just say the word...

To my surprise, her voice, her entire mood, suddenly shifted. "If you're going to have a lapse in control, I can think of a better place for it," she said sweetly, touching my face and attempting to kiss me. Worried that my self-control had already been pushed to its limit once today, I stopped her before she could start again.

"Must I always be the responsible one?" I asked.

My words did nothing to deter her. She was a woman on a mission.

"No," she said, smiling widely up at me. "Let me be in charge of responsibility for a few minutes...or hours."

"Goodnight, Bella," I insisted, though I knew she wasn't thinking at all about sleep.

"Wait – there was something else I wanted to ask you about."

"What's that?"

"I was talking to Rosalie last night..."

I breathed in deeply, frozen in place. I didn't know if I was up for this discussion. While a part of me hoped Rosalie's words had gotten through to her, given her a reason to reconsider her decision, I was equally terrified of what that would mean if it were true. Perhaps Rose was right, Bella hadn't really been thinking of all she was giving up. What if now that she was forced to think about it, she realized she couldn't give up the possibility of having children? The thought might save her humanity, but it could also cost me her love and dedication. It was something I would never be able to give her. The thought made me loathe my existence more than I'd felt in a long time.

"Yes," I finally said, preparing myself for whatever was about to be said. "She was thinking about that when I got in. She gave you quite a lot to consider, didn't she?"

"She told me a little bit...about the time your family lived in Denali."

Baffled, I tried to quickly sift through what I'd heard, but whatever Rose had said about Denali was no longer on her mind when I got home.

"Yes?" I prompted.

"She mentioned something about a bunch of female vampires...and you."

Oh, no. I did not want to have this conversation. Being stuck in an endless existence has a few down sides no one really wants to think about – like literally never living down humiliating moments. Not that I'd done anything particularly inexcusable, but the situation with Tanya's clan was not something I wanted to be reminded of. Ever. Least of all by Rosalie.

"Don't worry," Bella said, attempting to sound casual. "She told me you didn't...show any preference. But I was just wondering, you know, if any of them had. Shown a preference for you, I mean."

It was like I was there again, being bombarded by their lust filled thoughts, and as hard as I tried, I couldn't block out the memories. Irina and Kate were more discreet than Tanya, never making their intentions known out loud. They were actually quite embarrassed when they learned I could hear them. Tanya however...well, subtle was never her style.

"Which one?" Bella asked when I remained silent. "Or was there more than one?"

I knew it was unfair, not saying anything, letting her think the worst, but I was finding it nearly impossible to form the words. Especially since thinking of Tanya had also reminded me of one of the darkest times in my life. Right after I'd first caught Bella's scent and I had fled like the coward I was, I'd made the mistake of returning to Denali. I'd given Tanya the wrong impression and felt miserable for it.

I'm not used to rejection, she'd said dejectedly, then proceeded to let her mind wander freely through her thousands of lovers. It was meant to make me want her, but instead it had made me feel insignificant. Even if I had been interested, what would I have been to her? One grain of sand on the beach, one star in the endless night sky. I'd never considered myself vain, but surely I was worth more than that. Didn't I deserve better?

"Alice will tell me," Bella said, making me realize I still hadn't spoken a word out loud. "I'll go ask her right now."

I held her close, the thought of her talking to Alice about it making me nervous. Knowing her, she'd probably make some ridiculous joke that Bella would take too seriously, and it would make her more self conscious than she already was. There was no need. Bella was the only one I'd ever wanted.

"It's late," I said, internally cursing Rosalie for having brought it up to begin with. "Besides, I think Alice stepped out..."

"It's bad," she said, her heart starting to race. "It's really bad, isn't it?"

"Calm down, Bella. You're being absurd." She sounded so distressed, I wondered how far her mind had already taken it. I thought I'd made it clear there had never been anyone before her, but she seemed almost panicked.

"Am I?" she asked, eyes wide and nervous. "Then why won't you tell me?"

"Because there's nothing to tell," I said sincerely. "You're blowing this wildly out of proportion."

"Which one?" she persisted.

I let out a deep sigh. I couldn't believe I was being forced to justify a situation in which nothing had actually happened. Besides, the nothing had been long before I'd even laid eyes on Bella. Fortunately, I'd started to learn how crazy the emotion of jealously can make a person – otherwise I would have started to doubt Bella's sanity.

"Tanya expressed a little interest," I said in an overly uninterested tone. "I let her know, in a very courteous, gentlemanly fashion, that I did not return that interest. End of story."

If only it could have been, but Bella was persistent.

"Tell me something – what does Tanya look like?"

"Just like the rest of us – white skin, gold eyes," I said calmly.

"And, of course, extraordinarily beautiful." I could hear the hurt behind her words. She still didn't regard herself as beautiful, no matter the number of times I'd told her, showed her how amazing she was.

"I suppose, to human eyes," I said. Yes, Tanya was beautiful in her own way, but I'd had the advantage of seeing into her mind. It was not nearly as inviting as her outward facade, and that had a way of marring my image of her. Though I tried not to hold Tanya or her sister's pasts against them, it was difficult to see beyond the slaughters of the earlier years of their existence.

I smiled then, as I stared at the woman who'd finally awoken my sleeping heart. It was hard to imagine anyone purer or more selfless. Bella was truly Tanya's opposite in nearly every conceivable way.

"You know what, though?" I asked.

"What?" she muttered.

I leaned in closer, laughing lightly at her indignant expression. If it took the rest of forever to prove it to her, I vowed one day she would understand that no one, human or vampire, could ever hold a candle to her.

When my mouth found the soft skin at the base of her ears, I whispered, "I prefer brunettes."

"She's a blonde. That figures," she sighed, ridiculously still worrying though I was cherishing her, worshiping her with my lips.

"Strawberry blonde – not at all my type," I assured her, continuing to trail soft kisses across her cheek and over every inch of her perfect skin I could find. When I reached the base of her neck, I breathed her in reverently, smiling as I waited for her to accept my promises. It was fine – she could take her time. I was perfectly happy discovering new ways of showing her.

After several minutes, when her blood was racing so fast her skin was actually warming my icy lips, she finally spoke. I loved the way the words came out shaky and breathless.

"I guess that's okay, then," she said hesitantly, making me smile again in the darkness.

"Hmm," I said softly, letting my breath cool her heated skin. "You're quite adorable when you're jealous. It's surprisingly enjoyable."

I almost felt guilty for the sour expression my words elicited.

"It's late," I whispered, ready to let her drift back into the quiet sanctity of sleep. I hoped that now, with so much discussed and resolved, her dreams would be peaceful. "Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love."

I could feel her contentment as I began humming softly. She scooted her body against mine, pressing her cheek into my chest with a sigh. As her breathing steadied and her eyes started to flutter, I let my thoughts wander back to that which I longed for most – to be here, like this forever. My life, my love.

My wife.

Would she ever want the same things as I did? Would she ever understand the ways in which she would complete me if she'd only say yes?

As the hours passed and the light of morning crept in through the window, she began to murmur in her sleep. I traced her cheekbones lightly, then let my fingers run through her silky hair. Talk to me, my love...

"Mine," she whispered.

I smiled. "Always. I am yours."