The fifteenth of October. That's when I started the then-fairly feeble story known as Rebuilding. I honestly had no idea what I'd do with anything, and I'll admit to having expected the story to peter out and end up dead.
It's been seven months, and I've improved immensely, turning the story from lame with some high points to a moderate success. A moderate success that JUST REACHED A HUNDRED REVIEWS, BABY.
I'd just like to thank every single one of you who reviewed me, because you've all been very positive and supportive, and I'd have probably quit if I thought I wasn't doing well. Thanks for making sure that never happens!
I'm not nearly done writing this brain-dead, intolerant, narrow-minded, plothole-ridden collection of sentences we call a fic, and I'm not gonna quit any time soon, so roll chapter XXIV!
And on to two hundred!
Rebuilding
Chapter 24: Violence under Influence
The Super Smash Brothers sat around the Halberd, contemplating the information Snake had just given them about the fate of their friends. Some were determined to exact revenge upon the Subspace army, some were mourning the three losses, and some were worried for their lost companions.
Mario sat on the floor, looking at a picture he had kept in his pocket for a long time, a picture of a baby in a red cap and a younger-looking Yoshi smiling at a baby in a green cap.
"You survived-a, Luigi..." Mario muttered to himself. "Nice job, old friend-a..."
"I'm proud of him too," smiled Peach.
Mario felt Peach's hand on his shoulder. The plumber stood up, and looked at his princess.
"Peach-a, do you remember when Kirby and I had a dream-a? All of you called us crazy-a?" asked Mario, trying to hide any trace of emotion as best he could.
"Yes..." said Peach uncertainly.
"Kirby brought up-a some good points-a," recalled Mario bitterly. "But he was wrong-a. He wanted me to leave-a you. But with what that guy said about being united-a, I just want you to know that-a I love you, okay?"
"What do you mean, 'Kirby brought up some good points?!'" hissed Peach, removing her hand from Mario's shoulder at once. "Mr. Kirby's advice is more important than your own heart?"
"Uh, what-a?" asked Mario.
Peach made an angry noise, and stormed off to talk to Samus and Zelda.
"You'll get no sympathy from her," put in Ike, who was passing by with snacks from one of Meta-Knight's ration boxes.
"HA! Nice!" chortled Bowser, following with a mini-fridge. "Up high!"
Ike reached his hand up to hi-five Bowser, but instead got a knee to the groin while his guard was down.
"That was so awesome!" laughed Ike, doubled over in pain.
"Bowser-a, if you're going to work together with us, you-a and Wario need to be a little nicer-a," said Mario delicately.
"Wario's doing fine!" shrugged Bowser.
"He's-a writing profanity on the wall-a!" protested Mario, pointing over at Wario.
"I don't think that's a pen!" chuckled Bowser.
Mario threw up and fainted.
"Awesome!" laughed Bowser, kicking Mario's body. "Hey everyone, dogpile!"
Ike, Pit, Kirby and Yoshi, being impressionable, were the first to join the dogpile, followed by Fox, being stupid.
"What have I joined?" asked Snake in dismay.
"Drink this," said Bowser's muffled voice, handing a Super Shroom Shake to Snake from under the pile.
"Oh, I see, you have to get drunk," understood Snake, opening the bottle.
DK and Diddy walked over, arm-in-arm, drunk on Link's Lon-Lon Vodka.
"Check out what I've got here!" yelled DK drunkenly, slapping a Smash Ball into Diddy's palm.
"'ey, macs! Checks out what I can does!" hiccupped Diddy, headbutting the Smash Ball. The Ball broke and spilled its magical...fluids or whatever onto Diddy.
"Do I even have one of these things?" asked Kirby furiously, hopping out of the pile. "Will I ever get to do mine?!"
Diddy drunkenly dual-wielded two of his Peanut Popguns and activated his Rocketbarrels.
"Go man, go!" encouraged DK, whooping and fist-pumping.
"I cans use all these things, mac!" called Diddy, flying 'majestically' around the inside of the Halberd.
The dogpile on Mario broke up immediately as everyone watched Diddy Kong fly around.
"Wait a minute, why am I watching?" asked Meta-Knight. He immediately turned back around to steer the ship.
"Fire the guns! Fire the guns! Fire the guns!" chanted a jubilant Fox.
"Blow stuff up! Blow stuff up! Blow stuff up!" chanted a drunken Snake.
"Kill someone! Kill someone! Kill someone!" chanted the usual Zelda.
Diddy started firing peanuts everywhere.
"It's a feeding frenzy, guys!" cried Yoshi, opening his mouth. A peanut fell directly into Yoshi's throat, choking him.
"Yay!" cheered Zelda happily.
The peanut in Yoshi's throat exploded, ripping the dinosaur's tonsils apart.
"Yay!" cheered Zelda and Snake, the latter of whom opened his second drink.
...
"He fired the gun," Zelda whispered to Fox, who was vacantly staring into space.
"Yaaaaay!" cheered Fox, giving Zelda a hug.
"Oh Fox, I'll end you!" laughed Zelda merrily.
"What a funny joke!" smiled Fox happily.
Zelda broke Fox's arm and kicked him in the face.
"Can't-a we all try and be reasonable!?" asked Mario, watching Fox crying, Diddy flying around, the men chanting encouragement, the women smiling in spite of themselves, Pit being neither but still chanting, and Yoshi coughing up blood.
"No," replied Diddy, as his barrels exploded.
"But this is-a getting too violent-a!" protested Mario. A fallen barrel smacked him in the face. "And juvenile-a!"
Everyone stared at Mario in silence for a moment.
"Fallen peanuts!" cried Popo. Nana smacked him in the back of the knee with her hammer, and everyone began to dine on a meal of...uh...hard liquor and peanuts.
"Just like my uncle gave me when I was seven!" smiled Link.
"Wanna know what my uncle did when I was seven?" asked Pit.
"No," said everyone collectively.
"Okay," sulked Pit. "But it rhymes with 'stopened a burlesque house'!"
"Let's do that next time!" cried Fox enthusiastically.
Pikachu, in a drunken rage, cracked Fox's head open with a glass trophy.
Unfortunately for everyone, the glass trophy was an Assist Trophy.
"Where's all this stuff coming from?" asked Yoshi through his bandages.
"GRAAAR!" cried a furry little mole.
"What is that?" asked Kirby, looking at the mole with distaste.
"Mr. Resetti!" cheered Fox, clapping his hands. "He knows my beloved KK Slider!"
"I hope I missed that back when I was knocked out," replied Kirby.
"Well, let's put him back in the box-a," said Mario, grabbing Mr. Resetti's arm.
Mr. Resetti didn't take kindly to Mario, and decided to sink his axe into the latter's arm.
"What's the big idea treatin' me like an item, huh?" asked Mr. Resetti, who is apparently from Boston rather than Smashville.
"Oh-a...um, sorry about that..." apologised Mario sheepishly.
"Hey, don't make me kick your ass!" threatened Pikachu drunkenly. "You can't even move!"
"If I could move around on my own..." snarled Mr. Resetti. Yoshi picked up the mole's tiny fist and waved it. "I'd join this here Brawl!"
"Um-a, I guess you would-a..." admitted Mario.
"Lemme tell you about Assist Trophies, sound fair?" asked Resetti.
"I already know-a what they are," replied Mario.
Mr. Resetti continued on, as if he hadn't even heard Mario.
"They're items that call upon who knows what," continued Resetti.
Mario sighed and walked away.
"Most of the time, it's going to be some good egg who's gonna help you lay down the law," added Resetti. Yoshi got bored of moving Resetti's fist and walked away.
"That's a good thing, like a nice, shiny new pick," smiled Resetti fondly.
Kirby and Pikachu, sniggering, but a Stab Me sign on Mr. Resetti's back.
"Waitin' to show up will get that tic-" continued Mr. Resetti, but he was interrupted by Zelda, who had ran up and stabbed him.
"I forgot how useful the titanium one was!" smirked Zelda, putting the knife back in her pocket. "I usually go with a basic!"
"What the hell was that for?" fumed Mr. Resetti, bleeding to death.
"I read the sign," replied Zelda, sneaking some of the blood into a little cup. "The one that told me to stab you,"
"Who wrote this?!" asked Mr. Resetti. "Was it you damn kids?"
"Just stay cool," whispered Kirby to Pikachu.
"Gotcha," smiled Pikachu.
"We didn't do it!" Kirby told Mr. Resetti.
"Yeah, we did," argued Pikachu, confused.
"Oh, I guess I forgot you were drunk!" chuckled Kirby.
Kirby and Pikachu laughed merrily.
"Well, I'm going to have to teach you a lesson!" raged Mr. Resetti. "Just you boys wait!"
Mr. Resetti raised his tiny axe, but Ike stepped on him and he fell through his hole and out of the ship to his death.
"Kirby! Pikachu! Check it out!" called Ike excitedly, running over to the kids. "We replaced one of Pokemon Trainer's Pokeballs with a Smash Ball!"
"Oh, awesome!" grinned Pikachu, running with Ike towards Pokemon Trainer.
"OH, COME ON!" yelled Kirby, reluctantly following.
The three joined the small crowd around Pokemon Trainer, who was holding the Smash Ball.
"Come on kid, just use it!" encouraged Link. "I'm wondering what you'll do with it!"
"It's such a buzz, mac," assured Diddy, still dazed. "Use yours nows!"
"Use it, or Kanto will get another jihad!" threatened Wario.
"Well, I'm not entirely sure..." said Pokemon Trainer uncertainly.
"It's got smokes in it!" called Fox without thinking.
Ivysaur leapt out of its Pokeball.
"Alright! I've been dying for a smoke!" cheered Ivysaur.
"Yeah, me too," admitted Snake. "Let me just light up one right here..."
"Wait, you have cigarettes?" asked Ivysaur?
"And you're a plant..." realised Snake.
Ivysaur shook itself, and Snake picked up a leaf. He then rolled a piece of paper around it and lit up.
"Use the super move!" said Snake. "I'm gonna go smoke me some Ivysaur!"
As Snake puffed up, Ivysaur stepped on the Smash Ball. A mystical force pulled Squirtle and Charizard out of their Pokeballs.
"Take this! Triple Finish!" cried Pokemon Trainer, the Smash Ball's power possessing him.
Squirtle, Ivysaur, and Charizard all began firing strong attacks in different directions. Coincedentally, all of them shot Yoshi.
"Listen, fellows, keep it down!" protested Meta-Knight, walking over to all the commotion. "I'm trying to steer the ship!"
"Where are we going anyway?" asked Link.
"And who's steering now?" asked Pit.
"Auto-pilot, and I don't know where we're going, actually..." admitted Meta-Knight. "In fact, if the ship has an auto-pilot, what am I doing here? Go, Pokemon, go!"
"Hey, what moves are they even using?" asked Pikachu, now hungover.
"Well, given the fact that I'm a complete n00b, I gave my Squirtle three STAB moves. That means this must be Hydro Pump," began Pokemon Trainer, racking his memory. "Because I want Ivysaur to be completely pwned in the metagame, I gave him a full four STAB moves, we've seen the others so this is Solarbeam..."
"And Charizard?" asked Pikachu, rolling his eyes at the horrible movesets.
"Fire Blast!" smiled Pokemon Trainer. "For those times where a nearly-perfectly accurate mid-to-high powered Fire move isn't enough on a Charizard, I threw in a horribly inaccurate high power one that has 5 PP!"
"I hate you," said Pikachu, walking away.
"But don't you think they all look cool put together?" called Pokemon Trainer at Pikachu's retreating back.
"No!" smiled Fox brightly, walking over. "So, your super move sucks! At least mine is awesome!"
"You haven't used a Final Smash yet," said Pokemon Trainer, confused.
"IT'S MY BODY!" screamed Fox angrily.
Pokemon Trainer used some sign language commands, and Fox was Triple Finished.
"Listen, Pokemon Trainer," said Samus in a weird voice. "The whole 'huge blast' thing, it's just not very cool, you know? Not unless you do something after it to distract everyone. Like strip, you could do that!"
"I'm...uh...uncomfortable..." admitted Pokemon Trainer.
"What?" asked Samus. "All I said was that I liked your mov-PIT, GET OUT OF HERE!"
Pokemon Trainer looked and saw Pit sitting behind Samus with a megaphone plugged into her suit.
Call me, mouthed Pit.
Samus punched Pit in the eye.
"Get away from me, freak!" yelled Samus. Pit slinked sadly away.
"You shouldn't discriminate Pit for his sexual orientation, you know," reprimanded Pokemon Trainer.
"Oh no, that's not why I don't like him," assured Samus. "I don't like him because he's annoying and whiny,"
"Oh, jolly good," replied Pokemon Trainer.
"Where are we going on this thing anyway?" wondered Samus. "Hey, Meta-Knight! Fox!"
"Kirby!" finished Fox. He then cracked up uncontrollably. "Get it? Because my name sounds like-but those two never would-oh, that just kills me!"
"Pit, get back here," ordered Samus.
Pit shuffled up to Samus.
Samus threw Pit at Fox.
"What do you want?" asked Meta-Knight.
"Where are we going?" asked Samus.
"Good question!" replied Meta-Knight. "If I could find the controls, I'd tell you!"
"You don't have the-"
The Halberd had been falling right out of the sky for about a chapter.
"Oops," said Fox meekly, noticing a spilled bottle of Lon-Lon Vodka next to the control panel.
"Oh snap," said Meta-Knight quietly. "We're crashing...somewhere..."
They all crashed somewhere.
And so ends Chapter 24, the first mono-plot chapter since...a long time ago! Are they alive? Will they find any more veterans? Will they find any more new rookies? Will you review? Will you do your little turn on the catwalk? Will you or won't you, won't you please baby please, baby baby please?
READ AND REVIEW OR THE BOY DIES.