a/n: The truth is here – take your last guess now at what happened to Bella

Until A Weather Change Condemns Belief

EPOV

Walking up behind Tanya, I caught her before her shift finished.

"Thank you." Was all I said.

"For what?" She looked a little confused.

"The bed? For keeping my ass out of my own grave that little bit longer."

She laughed as she shrugged. "I just thought it would help a little, it was no problem but I am worried about you."

Tanya was the same age as me, she had been in my year at school after her family had moved from Alaska and we had always got along somewhat. We weren't great friends, but we got along.

She was about the only person I recognised when I got back to Forks and she had been quick to take me under her wing at work.

"I'm fine." I protested perhaps a little too much. But I was. It was Bella I was concerned about.

"I know, but you're getting in deep here. I know Bella Swan, she has a lot of issues." I nodded knowing she wasn't telling me anything I didn't already know.

I sat down on the bench in the staff changing room as I caught my breath and my mind.

"I..I just don't know what's happening here..." Tanya took a seat next to me, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"I saw you that day you brought her in Edward, the day she came off her bike. You were so angry towards her, so vicious. You're a good guy and you see now that Bella isn't bad like you thought she was. Are you trying to make up for how you acted?"

I remembered how I acted, how I grabbed hold of her and pulled her around like a rag doll. I hated myself for that. But it wasn't the reason I was wanting to help Bella.

"No, I just...I just have too. I have to try." I told her honestly.

"Okay, that's fine but remember your job first. Don't do anything too crazy for this girl because you are already pushing it. Your dad is so pissed at you right now."

I scoffed with a little laugh. She was right but I knew he would get over it eventually.

We were silent for a moment.

"How much do you care for this girl, Edward. I mean you can have pick of all the girls in this town..." She asked with a little concern in her voice.

"It's not like that. She is my sister's friend. I'm helping her, that's all."

"Come on, Edward. Don't live in denial. You care for her – a lot. It's okay to have feeling's for her."

My breath stuttered at the thought. "I don't have any feelings for her. She's a kid." I tried to argue. I knew she wasn't a kid and I knew I had feelings for her but I would do everything in my power to hide them.

"Stop lying to yourself. You like her. I saw the way you held her as you slept." she told me matter of factly.

"Tanya..." I sighed, I didn't know what to do. She could see it so clearly. In this place, she was the only one I really trusted with the exception of my father. She had my back since the moment I had began my placement.

"She isn't a child, she is an adult. Don't let what other people think, put you off. Just watch both your hearts in this whole mess because it will be hard on both of you." She rubbed at my arm and it was if she knew exactly what was going through my mind.

"Am I totally fucking my job up against the wall here?" I asked in desperation. "Don't tell anyone, don't let anyone know about how I feel, please." I begged her and I wanted to cry. I was admitting to everything I had been trying to kid myself with.

"I'm not going to tell anyone, it's private. Out side that door in the hospital, your the professional, just keep it up, okay." her grip grew tighter, warning me.

"What am I going to do? I can't help it. I just got pulled under by her so fast. I do want to help her, its not just because I care about her."

She shrugged. "It's none of my business, Edward, but you have to watch what you are getting into here. I know she likes you, that she trusts you but she won't keep herself alive for you, not if she is so determined."

I narrowed my eyes at her, seething. "She's not going to die. Don't you dare say that." I growled at her.

"I'm not saying she will, but she is a self harmer, you know that, she poisons herself constantly with alcohol. The whole damn town knows it."

"The whole damn town doesn't know shit. They gossip and say what they want too."

"You're right, Edward. I know she is self harmer, the town just thinks she's a drunk with a reputation."

I wanted to reach out and hurt her like she was hurting me but I knew I couldn't hurt her. I wouldn't. She was only telling me the truth, and fuck, did the truth hurt.

I pulled on my hair in frustration, needing to vent out my anger.

"I'm not against you here, Edward. I have your back. I'm just not lying to you about the truth."

I nodded silently, understanding her concern.

"She has just completely sent my life spinning, I have this feeling inside my gut, this pain for her. When I found her..." I couldn't finish my words.

"Seriously, Tanya, how ridiculously stupid am I being?" I needed to know. I wanted to know. Maybe it could snap me back to reality.

"Oh, I have never saw I bigger dumb ass in all my life, but I suppose that's what love does to you?" she shrugged trying to lighten her tone of voice.

"Love?" I spat, trying not to laugh at her stupidity. "I care for her." I told her. Why would she think I loved her?

"Edward, how would you have felt if she did die? I know, I saw that look on your face. You looked like you had lost your heart."

"You can't say that." I felt so mad at her words, she was so flippant about them.

"Why not?"

"I don't love her."

"Yes you do. Oh, Christ, you're so stubborn. I'm going to smash some sense into your head off of that damn locker in a minute if you don't wise up." she pointed to the locker in front of me and I had a feeling she wasn't kidding.

"Live in your little bubble, pretend to have no feelings for the girl you clearly like and dance around the whole situation if you really want, but it will get you no where. You need to be honest with her too. It's clear she has a strong connection to you as well."

"She's not ready for that, she needs help, not someone hitting on her." I argued.

"What if that's exactly what she needs, what if she needs to know that someone can love her, despite what difficulties she clearly has."

"It's called taking advantage." I told her flatly, she was being ridiculous.

"It's called being there for her." She argued back.

"I'm not having a relationship with her. I can't, I can't do that to her."

I just couldn't do that to Bella.

She deserved better.

She needed better.

The rest of the day went on so slowly. All I could think about was Bella and what Tanya had said.

Did I love Bella?

It was stupid to even think it. Okay, fine. I cared about her but that was it. We couldn't be anything else, we couldn't be anything more. I could only imagine my fathers reaction that that one if it was the case and no doubt I would be dragged away from her by her father, thinking I really was trying to take advantage. And he would be right to do so. It would be taking advantage.

I had called Alice a few times, she had spent most of the day at Bella's home but Alice being Alice, she had managed to talk the chief into letting her take Bella over to my parents.

She was still there and I would see her when I finished work. I felt settled knowing that Bella was in my old home with my sister. She needed some more rest and I only hopped Alice wasn't being too much for her, but I definitely preferred knowing it was Alice who she was with.

Pulling up outside my parents house, I parked my Volvo. My father was still at the hospital and was still totally pissed off at me. He had made my day at the hospital difficult, sending me to do every stupid little thing that the nurses should be taking care of. I knew he was trying to punish me, so I took it and never said a word.

Walking in I saw Alice and Jasper knotted together on the couch, kissing as if there was no tomorrow. I coughed and the pair jumped apart, looking at me. Alice only gave a sly smile while Jasper looked as if I was going to string him up.

I only ignored what I had saw and continued "Where's Bella?"

Alice's eyes looked up to the ceiling. "She wasn't feeling too great, she went for a lie down in Emmett's old room."

I nodded at her words but felt a pang of jealousy that she seemed to stay in my brothers room and not mine, not even after the time we had spent together had she changed where she went.

I took the steps two at a time as I rushed up to the room, quickly catching my breath before I gave a small knock and let myself in.

The room was empty.

It was clear she had been lying on the bed but she wasn't here any more. I shook the dread out of my head as I headed across the hall and knocked on the bathroom door.

No answer. Pushing the door open, the room was empty too.

My stomach knotted wondering where the hell she was.

I ran through the house looking all over for her, calling out her name. Alice had ran to me during my search and she and Jasper also began to look everywhere for her.

Emmett and Rosalie arrived a short time later. They had something to pick up, I didn't know what, and I didn't care but my panic over Bella had alerted Emmett and he was also beginning to worry about her.

"When did you last see her?" Emmett asked Alice everything I had.

"I told you, she went up the stairs for a lie down. That was a few hours ago. I assumed she fell asleep and I thought I should leave her." She was close to tears, we were both interrogating her and she was panicking at her missing friend.

"Leave her alone. She's been thought this. We don't know where she went." Jasper told off Emmett.

Who the hell was he to think he could speak to either one of us like that. I raced up to him, shoving him in the chest with my palm as he stumbled back. "No, you would have been to busy trying to get into my sisters underwear to care where Bella went to." I shouted at him.

Alice darted in front of me, tying to push me back and I felt Emmett's hand on my shoulder pulling me back toward him. He gripped his arms around me, pulling me away from Jasper.

I was wrong, I knew I was but I just had to lash out at someone. Bella was missing and I had promised her father that I would help her.

"Easy." Emmett warned as he pulled me out of the living room, away from Jasper.

"We need to find her." I felt broken not knowing where she was and I knew It was coming out in the tone of my voice. I was so desperate to know she was okay.

"I know, we will find her, don't worry. She won't be far. She would be walking." my stomach churned once again knowing that she could have been pulled away by anyone along the quiet road to our house, from Forks.

Alice and Jasper were quickly in front of me once again and I let out a quiet apology to Jasper.

He only shrugged and said he could understand.

"I need the four of you to go out along the road, keep driving until you find her. Emmett, Rosalie, you head into Forks along the main road and watch out for her if you don't see her look around the town, but don't tell anyone, okay. I can't have her father knowing, not yet."

"I'm not looking for her." Rosalie told me, she wasn't as abrasive as usual, her tone had some concern in it.

I looked up at her in shock. She wasn't even going to help.

"She tried to kill herself, Edward. I don't want to have to see that. Sorry." The look in her eye was sorry and I couldn't argue with her. I would never want any of them to find her like I had.

"No, I'm sorry. I...I never thought. It's okay. I'll look for her myself." It would take forever but I had to try.

"No, I'm still looking for her, bro. This is Bella, I'm not giving up on her either." Emmett told me completely sure of himself.

"Me too, Edward. Me and Jasper will hit the road out of town and up to LaPush, we'll go onto Port Anagles from there if we can't find her. If she headed on that road, she wouldn't have got far, not yet, anyway."

Rosalie looked like she was trapped, she wanted to help like everyone was doing but I couldn't blame her on her fear.

"Rose, you can stay here and keep a watch out, let us know if she comes back." We did need someone to do that and if Bella was going to be walking through the door, she was going to be alive.

Rosalie gave a small agreeing smile, somewhat happy that she was still helping.

"What about you, Edward?" Alice asked.

"I'm going to check the forest." I nodded towards the bushy trees at the back of the house. I knew if she was out there there was a high chance she went to be there to try to end her life again. That's why I was doing it. I didn't want anyone else to see her like that.

My heart clenched in my chest and I felt like I couldn't breath with the possible realization that this time, I would be too late if she tried to do anything to herself.

I watched Alice and Emmett speed out the drive in there cars on the search for Bella.

Walking back into the house I looked out a torch as it was almost dark. I knew my way through the trees well but I still needed to be able to look for her.

I was relived that nether of my parents were home, both of them going out to diner after my father had finished work.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I...I just couldn't see that. If she had done anything to herself..." I stood up from my crouched position, from where I looked through a cupboard under the sink, meeting eyes with Rosalie.

I nodded, understanding. "It's fine. Really, I do understand."

"You really do like her, don't you?" She wasn't accusing me, she reminded me of Tanya and the concern she had.

I sighed, knowing I was running out of time. "I don't have time for this, I need to find her." It was all I said as I walked past her, grabbing my jacket and heading for the mass of forest, beginning my search for Bella.

I climbed through the shrubbery, stumbling as I walked, as fast as I could. I called out her name, hoping that she would hear me and answer me, that my voice was enough to do that.

I had been walking for about a good half hour when I called out her name once again.

I heard a faint call out in the distance, my name being shouted and I knew it was Bella.

Changing to the direction I had heard to voice, I ran through the trees calling her name constantly.

"Bella, where are you?"

I could hear the faint "Edward" getting louder and louder the more I ran. I picked up my speed, running as fast as my legs could take me.

I accidentally shouldered a tree and stumbled forward onto my knees before looking up to find Bella standing about twenty foot in front of me in the meadow I forgot that I came to as a kid.

"Bella?" I called out to her, trying not to startle her.

She turned around with tears in her eyes, running towards me. Reaching me she wrapped her arms around me as her body crashed into mine.

"Sorry, I'm so sorry. I got lost." she let out as fast as she could speak.

"Are you okay?" I asked her as I pulled her down into the grass with me, to check her over.

I looked into her red teary eyes and saw she had been in distress. She only nodded to my question.

"What happened?" Why had she been out here.

"I got lost. I went a walk to give Alice and Jasper some time, I was coming back but I got lost. I panicked and only got more and more lost so I remembered the best way was to stay in the same place and I hoped you would come looking for me. I have been here for the past hour. I though I was lost for good." she sobbed into my chest.

"I'm here, you're fine. You're not lost, not any more. I've got you, okay." I promised her. I had her and I wasn't ever losing her again.

I let her settle in my arm for a little while, letting her regain her composure. I called Rosalie at the house and she called the others to let them know I had found her.

Bella was safe and sound. She had been lost, but now she was found.

I pulled the covers up over her arms, making sure she was warm enough. She was in my apartment and in my bed and I couldn't have been happier to have her there, especially after he dramatics of the night and of the weekend.

She had called up her father to let him know where she was staying and to say he was unhappy about it would be an understatement. He was thoroughly pissed off but he let her have her way. He knew she was safe with me. If she was in her house there would be a chance that she would leave in the middle of the night anyway, so he let her.

She hadn't been home after being found in the forest, she had came to mine with the clothes that was on her back and had changed into a t-shirt of mine once again.

She lay there bundled up in one of my t-shirts that she could have swam across and the covers just below her chin. Pushing herself back out she laughed at my antics of trying to make sure she stayed warm.

"I'm fine, Edward. You don't need to wrap me up in cotton wool." Her smile was small and genuine but I couldn't get the fact hat I had almost lost her this weekend out my head. That I had almost had to live my life without her smile, her presence, her very being. A world without her would be unthinkable now.

I knelt down at the side of my bed, facing her.

"What if I want to wrap you up in cotton wool?" I teased gently with her.

"I...I'd say you don't know what your getting yourself into." she teased a little too but there was some dark honesty in her words also.

"Why don't you tell me?" I pushed gently. I prayed that she found the courage to get out the truth. She was a lot stronger than she gave herself credit for. She was a fighter. Her body fought to keep herself alive this weekend. She had a deep, inexpressible will to live that her body fought so hard for. It was her mind that was so hell bent on being shut down.

That aching look flexed across her features once again and I knew my words had brought back her memories again.

If only she would speak them.

"Please, Bella. Tell me, I need to know. I need to know to help you and I need to know because I care so much about you I want to ease your pain if I can. Please, try."

She looked down to the bed covers, her fingers trailing along the design of the sheets.

She took a deep breath and she began.

She began to talk.

BPOV

August 29 2005

I felt her grab me from behind, snapping me from my panicked stare at the water coming in at my feet.

"We need to go, Bella. We need to go now." I had been trying to tell her that this was serious. that she needed to see what was about to happen, but she hadn't, she hadn't listened to me, she hadn't paid attention and now I was watching the water flood in around me, in our holiday home..

I didn't pick up anything. No one did. All we went with was the car keys, and the mobile phone I had in my hands.

We raced out to the car, the wind so strong, I could feel myself lifting up from the ground. I knew we were in trouble. We were in so much trouble and I didn't think I was going to make it out alive.

"Where are we going?" I asked as I climbed into the back seat of Phil's car.

"The Superdome. The news had said people were going there for shelter. I don't know where else to go." We were living in a small ground floor apartment not too far from the French Quarter of New Orleans, being a private hire, there had been no place marked as a go to, in-case of an emergency.

We were on our own in a city we didn't know and the biggest natural disaster of my time was on it's way.

We drove through the city with the car struggling to get through the water, the engine being drowned.

Phil struggled to control the steering, the strong winds forcing us off of the direction we drove.

All around was water, wind and the darkness.

The traffic lights swung wildly on there cables, many breaking and falling. People tried to stop us, wanting our car. It wasn't safe and and I didn't feel it either.

We kept driving, driving along the side of an embankment on the road in the direction of the Superdome.

We had passed it a few days ago. I remembered it well, I sat in the car looking up in amazement at the sheer size of the place. It was huge. So indestructible.

That's what I thought.

I never thought that this would be happening though.

The car coughed and spluttered as we reached up out on to slightly higher ground and I felt the car pick up speed as we drove long the side of the embankment. Phil still struggled with the steering, his fight with it seeming to get harder.

The wind blew underneath us and I could feel the car shake but we drove on with all the speed we could manage. The car was empty but it was struggling with the damage that the deep water had done the engine.

Pushing on through I could only think how right I was. I never blamed my mum but I couldn't help feel the regret of her not listening to me.

She thought I was being dramatic. That I was getting too ahead of myself.

I pushed the thoughts to the side knowing this was no time for blame, so I braced myself for the bumpy journey.

The car lifted at the back before it fell back down again, hitting off of the tarmac as we drove. We couldn't have had too far left to go, so I ignored it thinking about the safety that was getting so close.

I felt the car pick up off the ground again, sliding off of the road and down to the side of the embankment.

Panic filled me at the deep waters and the fact that we would never get the car back up, but Phil tried. He tried so hard but the rain had turned the sides of the embankment into marsh. It was useless but Phil tried again knowing that it would be almost impossible to walk to the Superdome, not only with the on coming hurricane but it would be almost physically impossible to walk the distance in this weather.

The next moment it was over.

My life...

My existence...

Looking out the window I saw it coming. I tried to warn them. I pointed out the front window as my mum and Phil looked out the back window, looking for the car to start reversing.

The never saw it coming. And part of me, thanked god for that.

A boat was lifted out the water by the wind and had came in the front of the car through the windscreen, the nose of it catching my shoulder as it pushed up through the vehicle.

Mum and Phil nerve stood a chance. They were struck by the impact and I knew by looking at them, they never survived.

I shrieked out moments later when I had realized. They were gone. I couldn't even see my mum with the boat blocking my view.

I saw Phil's eyes, all beady and full of death. I could see it. His warm caring personality had been ripped out of him with the impact of the boat.

I felt tears begin but I knew I had no time.

I would never leave them if they were alive, so I did what I had to do.

I reached forward to Phil, resting my fingers along his neck looking for a pulse. There wasn't anything and I checked all along the length of his neck needing something, some kind of reading.

I got out the car, holding onto the door as I opened his, I fought with the wind to open both mine and his, it felt like they were sealed shut with the force of the wind. Eventually, I got it open and began checking his wrists for a rhythm.

There wasn't one. He was dead, just like I already knew.

I raced around to the other side, having the same difficulties with the door and reaching for my mother. I found her completely lifeless.

I cried so hard needing her to be here, to be with me. I couldn't be left here all alone, not by myself, not during this nightmare.

I turned her lifeless body to me, seeing the cold dead look in her eyes that matched Phil's.

I struggled to breath and I threw up in shock. My hands trembled as I reached for her face, my fingers caressing her skin along her cheek. Closing her eyes, I reached forward and kissed her one last time on the cheek, saying my goodbyes.

She had been taken away from me, and now I was all alone in the world.

I saw nothing to live for but the need of survival pumped through my veins, telling me to keep trying, not to give up, not to let this disaster kill me too.

With one last heartbreaking look back, I left them, beginning my fight for survival, completely alone.

I climbed the embankment and struggled to stay on my feet for any length of time. I fought with the wind and the rain as I continued my journey to the place I knew I would get help.

The full time the wind and rain whipped around me. The humid air, making it hard to breath.

There was no one around me and fear creped into my head at the thought of someone coming out of the dark night to come for me, to hurt me.

The closer I got to the Superdome, the deeper the water got. Soon enough I was wadding through it, up past my knees.

I walked and I fell. I hurt myself so many times as I fell with the wind. I stumbled into small ditches, along the black path, never giving up, never stopping.

My legs ached, I felt so cold and I didn't know if it was the temperature or shock. Breathing was becoming harder and harder and with another fall, I hurt my ankle as I hit the ground.

I lay there wanting to give up. To die. My need for survival was fading and all I wanted was to be back with my mum and I wanted to be in that better place where I was sure she would be by now.

I was in hell and all I wanted was out.

I lay there on the ground, my head barely above the rising water.

I was giving up.

I was tired and exhausted and I knew I couldn't keep walking.

Closing my eyes I felt the water chill me more and more as I shivered harder and harder.

My teeth chattered, my head pounded and all I wanted to do was to fall asleep.

I wanted to rest.

Almost instantly I looked up to the sky hearing the engine of a helicopter and someone waving at me.

I automatically waved back up at them before I saw the helicopter pull further to the ground.

A large metal basket was released with someone in it and it began to lower to me. The man in the basket pulled me into him, gripping on tight and clipping me in before signalling to the helicopter to lift us up. It was so quick.

I was safe.

I had been found

So why was the only thought in my head, to die.

Reaching inside the chopper, the people checked me over and tried to help warm me up as I heard a a message being called out from one of the medics.

"Coastguard had been grounded. This is the last chopper in the air. You're the last one to be saved before Katrina hits."

My stomach dropped at the realization that this was only the beginning of the hurricane.

I felt cold and tired and giving up my fight I let the my eyes flutter closed.

"We're almost there." I heard the medic call out once again. Opening my eyes he nodded in the direction of the Superdome.

It didn't seem as big as I remembered from this distance and with the rain and all the debris surrounding it, it didn't look as indestructible either. It looked as weak and frail as I felt.

Looking to the side of it I could see a half lit sign. It had either lost it's power or it had been damaged.

It's words though, I read them, I kept them.

They were a sign.

The words were my sign.

They were my hope.

In a white glow, the light read, "The Saints Are Coming."

I would wait for my Saints.

a/n: Okay..? Starting to make a little more sense now. Did anybody guess right?

Please let me know what you think. Pleeeease!!!! Some serious lack of reviews I really could do with some feedback – Also the little vid I made on YT – if you haven't saw it – its safe for you to do so now!! xx