I KNOCKED AT PARADISE DOORS Chapter 5, a wolf's rain fanfic

I Knocked at Paradise Doors

Chapter Five: We Meet Again

I sneezed as I finished up on painting the back of the house. The kids left and went home. Moonlet was in the inside of the house finishing up, and Starffire was out on the front. I grabbed the bucket of paint and walked around front only to see a sight that made me smile motherly. Moonlet and Starffire were leaning on each other sleeping. I giggled to myself as I grabbed their buckets and dumped the paints on them. They jumped up in shock and I dropped the buckets running. I felt myself shift to my natural body. I felt my paws dig into the dirt. I heard barks and growls coming from behind me. I giggled to myself. I had to wake them up somehow. My body got stiff when I smelled a familiar sent. It smelled like… Toboe. I stopped in my tracks and sniffed the air. I caught whiff of it again and ran into one of the alleys. Where they nearby, why did they come here?

"Toboe?" I barked out in curiosity. I kept walking down the alley until I came to a fence. I turned my head left and saw a gray wolf lying on the ground panting. As I walk closer, I saw another wolf but this one was a little bit honey if not darker, and was a bit chubby. That's when the wind blew and the scent tackled my nose. I took a hesitant step back. I barked as I ran over to them, "Tsume! Hige! Wake up!"

I jumped a bit back in surprise when Tsume growled at me. "Would you stop making all that damn, noise? Some people just want to die in peace without all that barking!" Tsume growled at me. I tilted my head in confusion. "What are you talking about dying?" "We are so hungry; we just want to die in peace Polar." Hige barked hoarsely, his throat must be sore from lack of water. I glared at him and ran out the alley quickly. I wasn't paying much attention and I bumped into Starffire who barked playfully. "Found you Polar….What's wrong polar?" Starffire barked worriedly. Moonlet looked at me with a worried face as well but was trying her best to cover it up.

"Go in the alley behind me and turn right. You should see two wolves laying there. Watch them for me as I go hunting for some food." I barked demandly as I ran off down the street. I was running back to the old lady restaurant. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw Kiba and Toboe. I ran to them and growled in angrily. "What are you guys doing? Tsume and Hige are starving…" I took a step back in shock and to my surprise. They were eating raw boar meat.

Toboe dropped the meet in his mouth and ran up to me to lick my face. I shook my head back and I couldn't help but feel a grin spread across my snout. "I missed you, Polar." Toboe barked happily. I looked past Toboe at Kiba. He was giving me a compressed emotion. It looked like it could have been worries, missing, happiness….I didn't know what Kiba felt towards me. After a while I'm slowly going to stop caring. I walked up to him, "Kiba I hope you know that Tsume and Hige are in an alley starving to death. While you two eat to your fullest content."

Kiba grabbed a piece of meat and walked past me. I felt that all white fur brush against mines and I couldn't help but growl. I felt like he was trying to intimated me. Kiba growled back at me, "We were going to eat first to get our energy back. Then go back to them to eat. Toboe was the first one to pass out before we got here. Yet, along the way Hige found a lizard and let Toboe have it. In return for Toboe and I to find food and bring it back once our energy is restored. Why find food to bring back to someone else, if you yourself is about to pass out? Then how will the food get to the others?" Kiba kept walking and I could feel Toboe worrisome eyes on me. I didn't turn to look at them. Once I knew they were far enough I felt a growl emit through my throat.

Kiba thinks he a true pack leader. Yea, right and I'm a bird that is just going through puberty. I was better off without a pack on my back. I was able to survive on my own just find….I did it for so many years that I forgot how it felt to have someone care for you. Even when Iris was still around, I was starting to pull away from him and do lesser things to help him….

Flashback

I felt myself giggle as Iris nuzzled my neck. I was lying in the den and he just came back from a pack hunt. Iris dropped a dead rabbit in front of me. I crawled over to the rabbit and slowly begin chew on the rabbit meat.

"I found a lake nearby and I want you to rinse off before birthday." Iris barked lightly. I felt my ears become erect to the sound of his comment. I didn't really feel like getting out of my warm den just to rinse off, even if I needed one. Once I was done eating Iris convinced me to come to the lake with him. I came and set on the edge of the lake. He was in the lake swimming around.

"Polarisa, please sit in the shallow part or something." Iris whimpered out to me. I only gave him a light glare. "No, Iris I see no point of me getting in the stupid lake. I see no other wolves in the lake." I growled out lightly. Iris gave me a cold stare, "They got in earlier and I told them you'll be out later. However, you were sleeping and I didn't want to disturb you."

I glared, "This is disturbing me, Iris." "I'm only doing this for your own good, Polarisa." Iris whimpered softly at me.

I stood and growled an aggressive growl, "I dare you say you're doing this for my own good. I don't need to be playing in some damn water. I can take a bath when I'm not so heavy! Besides, you do nothing for me!" I whimpered when Iris got out the lake quicker then I could breathe. I took a couple clumsy steps back. He was giving this threatening glare. I whimpered again when I heard a loud growl erupt through him. It almost seemed as the whole earth was shake from his growl.

"I am ashamed that you say that Polarisa! After all I do! You don't do enough for me. You never do enough for me! I'm always giving 99 percent effort and you're giving 1 percent. Ever since you got bigger you became lazy and distance from the pack. I know you stay distance from the pack but you don't have to be nasty to wolves that want to be helpful to you. Those are the main wolves that will help you throughout raising the pups."

Iris eye became soft and his fur wasn't on edge no more.

Easy come, easy go
That's just how you live, oh
Take, take, take it all,
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble from the first kiss, Had your eyes wide open
Why were they open?

I felt my back side brush against a tree and I sat on the ground. I watched in awe as Iris approached me so slowly.

Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked, Cause what you don't understand is

I could feel the pups stir in my stomach as Iris took a slow step to me. Yet then he stopped….

I'd catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I'd jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby; But you won't do the same

I winced when I felt a raindrop touch my fur. I didn't care if was raining, maybe this will make up for the lake.

No, no, no, no
Black, black, black and blue beat me till I'm numb Tell the devil I said "hey" when you get back to where you're from
Mad woman, bad woman,
That's just what you are, yeah,
You'll smile in my face then rip the breaks out my car

I couldn't figure it out if I was crying or the rain made me like crying. Iris sat a couple feet from me as he sung to me. I couldn't tell if he was crying either.

Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked Cause what you don't understand is

I felt a whimper come out from my lips. This can't be happening to me.

I wanted to walk up to him and nuzzle him. Yet, as I kept staring at Iris it almost like he was shivering. I didn't know from what, though….. Was he cold? Or was he…crying?

If my body was on fire, ooh you'd watch me burn down in flames you said you loved me you're a liar because you never, ever, ever did baby...

I barked in surprise when I saw Iris charge at me and out snouts touched noses. I looked him straight into those beautiful clear eyes, the color of a cloud with a dark pupil and the red fur to make it look so interesting.

But darling I'll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I'd jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby; But you won't do the same.
No, you won't do the same,
you wouldn't do the same,
Ooh, you'll never do the same,
No, no, no, no

I watched as Iris pulled away from me and walked past me. What Iris was really singing true? I just there as the rain came down. I thought I did enough for him. I thought I cared my own weight in the relationship…. I thought I showed him I cared even without saying it. I felt a slow pattern of whimpers come out my body. I stood slowly and walked back to the den to see nothing. Iris didn't return back to the den. I felt the river of tears come out of me, for that was the first night I ever slept without anybody to keep me warm.

The next morning I found out that Iris hasn't been seen since from the hunting pack and me. Nurse, my friend, ran to me and nuzzled my fur. Nurse mid-night blue fur glisten in the morning sun and I felt something was about to happen. "Polarisa, we found out that Iris left…"

"Then go find him! We are wolves we can sniff each other out!" I felt a growl escape my throat as I looked at her. I hate being worried. It always made me angry.

"The thing is he left this world….not the just the pack…" Nurse whimpered for sympathy.

I felt everybody eyes on me. I felt this huge piece of live being ripped out of me and I didn't like it. I whimpered and the pack drew in closer to give me comfort. Yet, all their furs didn't compare to Iris's red fur and those clear eyes. I whimpered stronger as I felt other around me whimper. I can't believe he killed himself.

End Flashback

I felt strong pain shoot through me. I shook my head and turned around to catch up with Kiba and Toboe. I may have seemed distant in the past but this time I want others to know that I care for them, even if I have to say it.

I saw Toboe face lightens up when I walked beside him Kiba turned around and gave me a …. Smile? I smiled back and I knew this was going to hurt my pride but I had to say it.

"I miss you guys." I whimpered out.

I stood still when Kiba and Toboe eyes got wide. I knew they would be surprise but what happen next surprised me the most from Kiba.

"I missed you too!" Toboe barked happily.

Kiba looked over his shoulder, those golden eyes piercing my teal ones.

"I missed you also…..Glad you're back." Kiba barked out as he kept walking.

I stood there for a couple of seconds. I felt my heart skip a couple of beats, Kiba….Thank you.

I growled as I watched Hige flirt with Moonlet. After giving Tsume and Hige their share of the food, they were back to their usual selves. I giggled as Toboe and Starffire went to go play with the kids. Tsume was just chilling back; he was laying in the shade on the porch. Kiba was walking around the town just to take a stroll. Hige was following Moonlet like a lost puppy. I giggled at that.

I was lying beside Tsume. I made it a goal to get Tsume to say he missed me. Hige already nuzzled me and confessed he missed me. I only need Tsume to confess. I giggled as he growled when our fur brushed each other.

"Get away from me Polarisa." Tsume growled.

I whispered Tsume my full name when we were in the snow. He was shocked that I my name was a name of a rare crystal in the portal. It was a rumor that not a lot of people know about it including animals.

Yet my mother knew of the stone. Tsume only calls me my full name when we alone with each other or he's annoyed.

I giggled again as I brushed up against him again.

"Stop," Tsume growled again glaring at me.

"Admit it Tsume, you missed me." I barked happily rolling over on him.

I felt his warm body rumble under mines as he growled.

I watched as he shifted into human form and walked off the porch. The man waved bye to Tsume and soon I turned human to follow after him.

"Tsume please admit it so I can protect Moonlet from Hige." I said half heartedly.

I grabbed onto Tsume's arm and cuddled with him as we walked. I could hear the elders saying how much cute young love is. I knew Tsume anger vein was popping out his head because he was trembling.

I couldn't hold in my giggle for long.

He yanked his arm form me, "Ok! OK! Damn your annoying Polarisa! I missed you annoying, fat, over weights self!"

I felt my anger vein pulse at the size comments. I could hear Tsume snickering and I knew he did that on purpose. I looked at him and glared. I didn't have time to argue with him. I turned on my heels and walked the opposite way.

I could hear Tsume laughter. I couldn't help but smile.

'I missed you too Tsume.' I thought to myself. I truly missed this pack…..

I hope I can enter paradise with them…

TBC [A/N: GRENDE-BRUNO MARS, SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE]