AN: GREETINGS, EARTHLINGS! MAGGIE HERE, LEADER OF THE PLANET...uh...Whatever, forget the planet, point is I'm back. Back from WHERE, you ask? Good question. I'm not entirely sure, but if you figure it out, lemme know! Anyway, I would first like to say that if you don't know who Eugene Lee is, then shame on you *wags finger* and second, if you don't know who ADAM LAMBERT is, then EXTREME shame on you, and I happen to be a huge fan of his, so if you do not like him, please refrain from flaming him in your reviews. Thank you. Also, the part where Galinda sings, "Hands touch, sparks flash," and Elphaba responds with, "keep it up girl, I'll kick your..." and then we yell "rating!" at her and she finishes with "...butt." did not come from my mind. I got the idea from "Wicked Retold or Not" by PocketSevens, which I highly suggest. Please R&R, those who leave reviews get to have a make-out session with Fiyero (Elphaba, if you're a boy), pre-approved by Elphie, of course (if you're a dude getting one with her, it's pre-approved by Yero). Thanks to those who reviewed last chapter! You guys know who you are, and this chapter is dedicated you! Hope you like it!

xoxo-

Maggie

Disclaimer:

Elphie: Maggie has something she wants to tell everybody, don't you, Maggie?

Me: *grumbles inaudibly*

Fiyero: Sorry, Mags, what was that? Couldn't quite hear you.

Me: I don't... *mumble mumble mumble* Wicked...

Glinda: One more time, sweetie.

Me: I DON'T OWN WICKED, IT ALL BELONGS TO GREGORY MAGUIRE! THERE, HAPPY?

Others: Yes.

Chapter Two: Dear Old-HOLY SHIZNIT, IT'S ADAM LAMBERT!

*it is dark because I'm being lazy and don't want to turn on the lights*

Joe: HIT THE LIGHTS!

*lights go up*

Joe: Much better. Now, where were we? Oh yeah. EUGENE! SCENE CHANGE!

Eugene Lee: On it! *changes set and gives thumbs up*

Galinda: *stands there smiling like an idiot*

Elphie: Ahem.

Galinda: *oblivous*

Elphie: I SAID, "a-HEM!"

Galinda: Oh, right. *clears throat* (singing) LA LA LAA LAAA! WE'RE GONNA MAKE YOU-

Me: Nope.

Galinda: *thinks* (singing) THANK GOOD-

Fiyero: Try again.

*pause*

Galinda: ...*is distracted by the fact that a few of his shirt buttons are undone and we can see part of his chest* (singing to the tune of "I'm Not That Girl") Hands touch, sparks flash-

Elphie (singing to same tune): Keep it up, girl, I'll kick your-

Everyone else: RATING!

Elphie (still singing to tune): ...butt.

Me: *clears throat* Gali,* remind us again what you call your parents?

Galinda: Oh, that's easy! I call them Momsie and Popsical!

Me: Know any SONGS about your-coughcoughhintcoughchough-DEAREST, DARLINGEST Momsie and Popsical?

Galinda: ...

Stephen Schwartz: *headdesk*

Elphie: OH, JUST FORGET IT, I'LL START THE DUMB SONG!

Eugene: *hands her piece of paper (the letter prop)*

Elphie: My dear father...

Galinda: OH, THAT song!

Everyone else: NO SHIZNIT!

Elphie & Galinda: (singing) There's been some confusion over rooming here at Shiz...

Elphie: But of course I'll care for Nessa...

Galinda: But of course I'll rise above it!

Both: For I know that's how you'd want me to respond, yes...There's been some confusion for you see my roommate is...

Galinda: ...unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite not possible to-

Stephen: IMPOSSIBLE, Galinda, it's IMPOSSIBLE to describe, not "NOT possible," IMpossible! GET IT RIGHT FOR ONCE!

Me: I know who can help set them straight. He's been in this play before as a matter of fact. The only problem would be if Galinda got distracted by his hotness, but if that happens, we can always just smack her, of course.

Galinda: HEY!

Joe: As long as there's a chance he can help get things back on track, we're willing to take that risk. Author him in, Maggie.

Me: Gimme just a sec...*writes in Trusty Binder of Wicked Stories*

*after a moment, there are footsteps coming down the hall. We turn and the stage door opens. Adam Lambert (squeeee!) walks in*

Adam Lambert: Where am I? How'd I get here? And who are all you people?

Me: *high-pitch, very G(a)linda-esque squeal* ADAM! *kidnaps him*

Joe: You authored in Adam Lambert?

Me: Hey, I can't help it if he's one of my Top Ten Obsessions! Besides, he's been in the play before, so he knows the script and might be able to help keep things under control.

Joe: ...Point taken.

Adam: Joe? Joe Mantello? Is that you? I haven't seen you since I was in San Francisco!

Joe: I know. Nice to see you, too.

Fiyero: So who exactly did this guy play?

Me: Before he got famous, when Wicked was in San Francisco, Adam Lambert played, well-

Stephen: You.

Me: *nods*

Adam: *stares at Fiyero*

Fiyero: *stares back at Adam*

Both: SWEET! I'M HANGIN' WITH HIM! *point to each other*

Me: This is not working the way I planned...Oh well! At least now I have my Adam hostage!

Adam: Actually, now that I get to hang out with Fiyero, I'm CHOOSING to stick around. By the way, what's your name?

Me: Just call me Maggie. It's a short version of my middle name.

Fiyero: Yeah, and her middle name is Margaret. But ALL of us call her Maggie. Sometimes we call her Mags. And she has nicknames for all-or at least MOST-of us, too.

Elphie: *gently smacks him upside the head*

Fiyero: What was that for?

Elphie: You were starting to digress.

Fiyero: Oh, well in that case, thanks.

Elphie: No problem.

Fiyero: Wanna make out?

Elphie: HECK, yeah!

*they start making out. Fiyeraba fans around the world (including me) go dreamy-eyed and sigh. My eyes become glued to the Fiyerabaness, completely helpless and totally unable to stop watching*

Boq: *sneaking up on me* *tries to discreetly pull Binder out of my grasp*

Me: *pulls it away from him and smacks his hand* MY BINDER! NO TOUCHY! *starts writing*

Adam: What is she doing?

Nessa: When Maggie writes in there, things happen, Adam. Sometimes they're good, sometimes they're bad, sometimes they're neutral, but no matter what, they are ALWAYS twisted and insane in some way, shape, and/or form of one kind or another.

Boq: Her mind can be a very dangerous place. Once you enter, there is no going back, and if you ever do get out, nine times out of ten, her insanity will have corrupted you. Proceed with caution, my friend.

Me: SHUT UP!

Boq: MAKE ME!

Me: OKAY! *keeps writing* OBEY ME, SLAVES! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!

Boq: Didn't she say something similar at the end of the last chapter? AND do the evil laugh?

Nessa: Yes, I believe she did.

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*fade to black*

AN: I hope you enjoyed it! I'll probably have the next chapter up by the end of the day. It's Saturday and I have nothing to do today but lounge around and read/write fiction, so...yeah. By the way: *Gali is a nickname that I came up with for Galinda a few days ago while writing a Shiz-era fic in one of my Binders with my trusty fountain pen (any ideas on a good nickname for the Binders and pen? I got nothing). And for those of you who don't know, the thing about Adam Lambert playing Fiyero in San Francisco is true. It was before he auditioned for American Idol. You can find videos of his performance on YouTube. Look for him singing "Dancing Through Life" and "As Long As You're Mine."

xoxo-

Maggie