Way Back When. Part 8.
Sian entered the house and took the remaining seat between Rosie and Sally. She sat down apprehensively, and not before rubbing the palms of her hands on the tops of her jeans and quietly clearing her throat. She looked round the table nervously and as hard as she tried, just couldn't stop the thudding of her heart in her chest. It was making her entire body shake and her breaths come out in like, stunted gasps.
Or at least that was how it felt.
She licked her lips and looked to her left at Rosie, and kind of raised her eyebrows to acknowledge her. She didn't know what else to do. Rosie quickly looked away and suppressed a grin. The brunette just looked at her plate and picked up her fork, finding great interest in her veg all of a sudden.
Sian looked across to Sophie and shyly bit on her top lip. Sophie's interest was only in her sister and she sat there, pouring three kinds of venom into her death glare. Sian could see her ex's jaw clench and unclench ten times a second and knew this dinner was going to be as awkward as hell.
The blond took a nervous breath and took a sip from her glass of water and then started to eat the food in front of her. She wasn't too sure what to make of what had happened. Sophie had said she wanted to talk, and up until five minutes ago in the garden, had made a very good attempt at not touching Sian, at all. Clearly that had all gone out the window, and so that was a good thing, surely? Right now she couldn't read Soph at all. The brunette was chewing her food very slowly and was still fuming at her sister; cutting her eyes at her like they could penetrate glass. Nothing was being said at all.
Sian was just a mess of emotions.
"Well, this is nice", Sally began, as she smiled at everyone at the table, "...isn't it?" she asked no one in particular.
Kevin raised his eyebrows and took in a breath. He too, took a sip from his drink. His attention was divided between his daughters and was clearly wondering what the hell was going on. Although he didn't ask. Probably knew better.
"This is nice, Mrs. Webster", Sian smiled, remembering her manners. She didn't really want the meal to be ruined, just because she was sat in the room. Why did she have to be the catalyst in every kind of awkward situation, just recently? Sian sighed.
Sally turned her head to Sian. "I keep telling you to call me Sally" she said animatedly, thankful for the interaction, however small it was. "Honestly Sian you won't be told, it's just like before when you were here all the time; you never used to listen to me then".
Kevin raised his eyes to look at his wife and his brow furrowed. He hoped she might stop but knew from many years' experience that it took a while for her brain to catch up with her mouth.
Sally carried on smiling, "..wondering around part of the family, and you still insisted on calling me Mrs. Webster". Then she stopped. She took an anxious breath realising that was probably not the best thing to have said, seeing how the atmosphere was already highly charged, for whatever reason. Sally didn't let her smile fade though, however Sian looked back to her plate. Sally looked at Kevin who provided no help at all, he just took another sip from his drink and so she, too, ploughed her attention into her food.
Sophie had broken her trance as soon as Sian had spoken. Her expression changed and she took in a breath that seemed to lift her up in her seat. She saw how awkward Sian appeared and knew it was her fault. All her fault. What had she done? Sophie had let her emotions and desire lead her and she regretted it. She exhaled and relaxed into her chair. Her arms rested at either side of her plate and she slowly rolled her knife between her thumb and forefinger. She contemplated her ex and didn't take her eyes off of her, for what felt like an eternity. She watched as Sian dipped her head in a kind of embarrassed way as her mother said whatever it was she had said. Sophie wasn't listening, to that. Sian had then begun eating and didn't lift her head to look at anyone. Sophie wasn't sure what she was feeling. She knew she had made a mistake by being so bold in the garden, which really wasn't the time for what she had done. She had succeeded in making everything more awkward than it already was and she wasn't sure how she was going to take it back. She decided she wasn't going to think about it, for the moment. Sophie brought a hand up and rustled the hair at the top of her forehead and flicked it over and to the side, and then tucked into her meal wholeheartedly.
The rest of dinner proceeded in semi-silence with Rosie offering up the odd question. Clearly trying to get the ball rolling again as she was the one who had brought things to a shattering halt, earlier, after all. Pretty much it was her and Sally doing the talking. Sian watched as Sophie eased back into the conversation, gradually getting calmer and calmer as the discussion flowed. She was happy at that, at least. Sally seemed content on boasting about her youngest daughters photographic achievements. Apparently, she had been published! Although, Sophie was quick to slap that one down, noting how she didn't consider a series on Mancunian wildlife in the gazette an amazing accomplishment. Rosie nearly spat her food out laughing, remembering her little sister's research on it at the time and happily shared it with the table. Bats, birds, amphibians and insects, were pretty much it.
Sophie favoured her sister with another look as Rosie covered her mouth and tried to swallow her food. Everyone found this memory funny and Soph had long since given up on trying to impress Sian with this conversation, pretty much since her mother had brought it up. "Trying to get a butterfly to stay, is impossible", she offered as she too, started to laugh. Sophie looked at Sian, who was grinning from ear to ear. She felt herself melt. "Guess it was funny, though". She blushed, ever so slightly.
"Not as funny as you chasing that butterfly onto the Platt's shed!" Rosie added, and the table ruptured in laughter.
"Didn't you fall off?" Kevin interjected.
Sian fell back into her chair. She was in stitches.
"Alright!" Sophie exclaimed, and covered her face with her hands. Why did her family feel the need to humiliate her? It wasn't right. Surely.
Sally was just pleased everyone was happy again. At least, on the surface, and that was good enough for her. She started to clear the plates away as everyone had finished and she tried to shoo everyone into the living room. Sian helped with the plates and Sophie excused herself to the bathroom. On her way out she practically fell over a pair of legs that was stretched out across the landing. To be fair, there was no practically about it. Sophie's knees impacted the floor closely followed by her torso and then her head. If it had been a cartoon a big DOOF would've appeared in front of her.
"Rosehh!" she exclaimed. "That bloody hurt!" and then she slapped her. On the arm. Mores the pity.
Rosie retracted her legs and brought her knee's up to her chest. "Soz", she giggled, and then raised her eyebrows, lowering her voice a little "..and lol, by the way".
"Uuhhh", Sophie grumbled, not hearing that last bit. She gradually lifted herself up. "What are you doing you nutcase?" she said, over-emphasising every word.
Rosie was caught up in her mobile phone, her thumbs thundering across the keypad. "Texting". The glare from the display bounced off her face she held it that close.
That really wasn't what Sophie meant. The younger Webster sighed. "Fine. Excuse me for interrupting". She rubbed at her forehead and started to walk off.
"Wait!" Rosie shot to her feet and pocketed her mobile. She grabbed Sophie's arm. "Not so fast, Romeo!" Her eyes were wide and her expression was set to its highest 'go-get-gossip' mode. "What was all that about in the garden?" Rosie was right in her sister's personal space and she folded her arms across her chest and hunched her shoulders, tight. She was waiting.
Sophie regarded her with a sort of, pissed off face. And then she softened it and sighed, relaxing her arms thinking really, what was the point in denying it? She leaned on the wall, and gestured in the air with her hands. "I don't-" ..that was wrong, because she did. Sophie licked her lips and tried again, "I'm not, I mean I.." she was shaking her head and getting lost around her words. Rosie was peering at her expectantly. It wasn't helping. Sophie sighed again, but louder this time and closed her eyes. "I love her, you know?" She opened her eyes and looked at her sister for help. Sophie felt just, all over the place. She thought she should deny it, thought she should regret what had happened earlier, but her heart and everything she felt in her entire body told her otherwise. She ached for Sian, physically needed her more than anything else, and no matter what her head told her to do, however crazy it was, however much it mightn't work, she just had to try. Sophie pictured Sian's face and breathed out dreamily. She needed her back. And her mind was made up.
Rosie had been nodding her head through her sister's ramblings trying to hurry her along to the point. At Sophie's admission her expression had brightened some, "yehh, and?" she grinned toothily, and inched that lil bit closer. It was the most obvious thing Sophie could have said.
"Isn't that enough?" Sophie blurted. She didn't think that was a small thing to admit, however much her older sister may have been expecting it.
Rosie rolled her eyes, "well, what are you going to do now?" she was excited; she put one hand to her chest and looked to the ceiling, "it's like a love story unfolding before my eyes!" She grinned, "..and I'm the genius behind it!"
"Yehh alright Cilla", Sophie quipped, she thumped both shoulders against the wall, "genius is pushing it a bit, for you!"
Rosie ignored that and sucked in a breath, resting her gaze back on her sister. She regarded her warmly, all joking aside. "Are you going to tell her?" her tone was serious.
Sophie looked at the floor and thought about it. She forced her hands in her pockets and knew exactly what she wanted to do. A grin spread itself across her face. "Yeh", she breathed, and then nodded. "I think I am".
Rosie grabbed Sophie's arm and squeezed it she was that excited. "Eeee!" she enthused. It made Sophie chuckle. Rosie then lightly slapped her, playfully. "Go on then!" They moved for the stairs.
"..I'm just asking, I thought it was odd, that's all".
Sophie stopped at the foot of the stairs, witnessing an exchange between her mother and her soon to be girlfriend, again. Rosie froze behind her, as well.
Sian was panicking, she didn't want this conversation to be happening.
"Sal", Kevin piped up, putting a hand on his wife's arm, "leave it".
Sally shrugged, "I don't see what the problem is, all I asked was why they broke up in the first place, they seemed so perfect together. I mean everyone has their problems but-"
"Mom", Rosie leaned forwards and put a hand out in front of her, and Sophie, "I don't think it's the time-"
"I think it's the perfect time.." Sally seemed content in careering on, even though neon flashing danger signs were going off, somewhere. Clearly in front of everyone but her.
Sian had started to pace a little, in front of the living room couch. She had no idea how the conversation had ended up here, all she had asked about was little Jack as she hadn't seen him around, and somehow they had ended up with Sian leaving the street, that time, way back when. Perhaps it was a touchy subject for Sal, and therefore she had opened up an obvious touchy subject in return. Note made! Sian considered. Right then she had no idea what to say. Her eyes wondered over to Sophie who looked at her back, the brunette seemed suddenly knocked off guard, like this was the last thing she was expecting. Sian wondered what Sophie had been thinking, before she came down the stairs. Her attention came crashing back to the subject at hand, and Sophie pulled her eyes away and glared at her mother.
"Mum now is not the time!"
"Well when is the time?" Sally looked back to Sian, "and why is it suddenly such a heated subject?"
Rosie saw an opportunity and moved round her sister, trying to distract some attention away from the situation. "It's not mum, you're just making it heated". She took a seat on the sofa, "God knows why".
Sian rolled her eyes and pushed her hair over her head. She wished Rosie hadn't of said that.
Kevin had had enough drama. He turned and went into the kitchen.
"That's because this one said something about feeling neglected and being ignored for months on end and so Sophie had bought it all on herself". Sally was in full bitch mode and crossed her arms tightly over her chest. "Whatever 'it' was, is what I'm waiting to be answered, Sian..?"
Sian's eyes fell shut. It felt like the life had totally run out of her.
Sophie's attention snapped to her ex. Anger flared, astonishment was what she predominantly felt. She couldn't believe it. Sophie took a step towards Sian. "What?" she hissed, her eyes as wide as they would go.
Sian's emotions were teetering on the edge. She felt like crying. Surely, everything now was ruined. She looked at Soph and she was catapulted back, four years, the expression was much the same. Just with something added, hatred? Sian hoped not. The blond's voice was quiet, and it shook a little with the heaviness of what she felt. "I didn't say it like that, Soph.."
Rosie had the side of her head resting in the palm of her hand. She regarded Sian sideways and her heart went out to her. This was awful.
Sian continued, "..I didn't mean-"
"You didn't mean what? Sian?" Sophie demanded. The venom in her voice was clear as day. She was blinded by anger, no way had it been her fault! No way! "So it was all my fault, was it?"
"No"
"My fault that he was there?"
Sally shot her head from Sian to look at Sophie, "who was there?" ..and then back to Sian, "he was where?"
Rosie raked her hands through her hair. This was it.
Kevin's interest had peaked in the kitchen. He cocked his head to the side.
Sophie hadn't shifted her gaze from Sian. Her eyes were digging into her. Sophie was now behind the sofa and she was pushing her fingers into the top of it.
Sian's voice was the quietest it had ever been. "Soph.."
Sally couldn't take it. "Sophie?"
Sophie snapped her head to her mother. "Ryan! Ryan was there!" she looked back to Sian. "Ryan was with her, in our flat, kissing her!"
Everyone looked to Sian, who dropped her head. She felt ashamed. Her impulse was to run. But she remained. She wouldn't do that twice.
"What?" Sally was shocked. She had no idea. How could this have happened without her knowing? She looked at Rosie, "did you know about this?"
Rosie looked at her mother and rolled her eyes, she got to her feet. "Look, I think everyone needs to calm down-"
Sophie was beyond calm, however. It was too late for that. All that she had wanted to scream at Sian four years ago was piling on the tip of her tongue just waiting to fall out. "That's why she left! She cheated on me, with him! Slept with him in our flat!"
Sally was stunned into silence and now Kevin re-appeared behind her, his eyes now wide. "She did what?" he demanded. He couldn't believe it.
Everyone's attention was turned on Sian. They glared at her and waited for some kind of reply. Even Rosie stared at her, her expression and body language was softer, however.
Sian looked at Sophie. Her eyes were confused and her mouth was open. She didn't quite understand what had happened or what was being said, to be fair. She made one shake of her head, and tried to peer through the alien expression on her ex-girlfriends face. If it was hate she saw, she never wanted to see if from Sophie's eyes again. She took a breath in and spoke for all she was worth, "I never!"