Part 18.
Rosie impatiently heard her phone ring out. Over, and over. She lowered it from her ear and held it in both hands out in front of her, her thumbs darting over the keypad. Her eyes were wide she was that annoyed. "UUgghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" she screamed aloud, as the people standing around her slowly started to back away.
She didn't even notice. Her lips moved as she typed, and she spoke the words slowly, sounding them out as she wrote them. "Siiiaaaan! I'm not kidding pick up the damn phone or I sweeaar to God you'll regret it!" She forcibly pushed the 'send' button and then looked around her, gasping in a breath to try and ease her frustration. A couple of lads in her eye line were looking at her and they both smiled. "What!..are you looking at?" she demanded before dialling Sian's number again and pressing the phone to her ear. The brunette shook her head, no one understood what she was going though and she didn't need weirdo's looking at her. Regardless of how fit they might be. She bit on her bottom lip and rolled her eyes. She mumbled to herself, "if you don't answer I'm gunna-"
"Hello?" came the reply over the speaker.
It snapped Rosie to attention. "Sian?"
"Well, yeah.. ?"
The brunette was aghast. "What do you mean well yeah? Where are you? Why aren't you here? What's going on?" Rosie was shouting and she didn't care who heard. She wanted answers.
There was a pause. "I'm at home-"
"-why?"
An even longer pause.
"Sian!"
"Look Rosie", Sian piped up, but she didn't really know what to say. She stumbled with her words. She sighed, "I'm just not sure.."
Rosie rolled her eyes and walked to a corner and stood with her face to the wall. "Ohh no! No, no, no!" she tried to keep her voice low. "Listen to me Sian.." she pointed her finger and poked it at the brickwork as she spoke. "..this is the last time I get involved with you two. My little sister is getting herself in a state in there because she's heartbroken, and this is the last time I tell her to wait on you, and give you a chance-"
"-but she was all over Maz today!" the blonde defended.
"So? She loves you! You.." she shook her head some, "you idiot!"
"But-"
"But nothing! So she didn't chase after you, does that mean you're going to let her think that's it?" Rosie was staring intently at the wall, she had to force her words out through clenched teeth.
"..No". Sian's voice was quiet.
"So I swear to God this is the last time. You two have been fighting each other since the start so whatever problem you have in your head, get over it!"
"Roseh!"
"I'm being serious! This isn't good for her Sian, she lost you once", the brunette shook her head and looked at the ground. Her index finger rested against the wall and her tone was softer. "She's destroying herself in there".
There was a pause on the line. Rosie chewed on her bottom lip gently and waited for an answer.
"I'll be there", and she hung up the phone.
Rosie stood there for a minute or so, and then put her phone in her bag. She turned from the wall and stretched her fingers out in front of her. She looked at her fingernail and noticed it was slightly scuffed from all the wall poking. She frowned and blew on it. The things she did for her little sister.. Rosie looked up and paused as she saw a few more people staring at her. She rolled her eyes and went back inside the club.
Sophie was, drunk. Like well drunk. She was hanging off Maz like she would fall over without the support. She had her arms around the older woman's shoulders and was leaning into her neck.
Maz didn't really know what to do for the best. What had started out as trying to get Soph to have a good time had turned into her adamant on getting paralytic. She kind of, tried to look at her ex out of the corner of her eye, but the younger brunette was practically glued to her.
"C'mon babes", Maz said trying to get Soph to stand up. "You need some air".
"No I don't!" Sophie exclaimed. "I need anuvverr drinkk-"
Maz held onto Soph's forearms. "Ooohhhhhh no you don't". She looked towards the bar, "you need some water-"
Sophie snatched a hand out of Maz's grip and rubbed at her eye with her palm. "No I don't.." she pretty much pouted.
Maz sighed, what was she going to do? What if Sian showed up? This was a disaster. "Soph, babes, you really need to snap outta this". Her brow was furrowed and she tried to peer beneath her ex's gaze who was looking at the floor. Maz was worried. "Are you okay?"
Sophie looked up and into brown eyes and after a moment she smiled a huge grin. "Yeah babe I'm fine", and she went to throw her arms around Maz's neck again.
She tried to dodge it but Soph used her weight and almost fell on top of her. Maz thanked God she worked out so she had a strong physique. "What if Sian shows?"
And that turned her mood. Sophie stood up straight and looked at her ex with an expression of disgust. "Don't talk about her!" she snapped, and she pointed at the older brunette with force. "You and Rosie can jus...shurrup! She ent gunna break me again.." she had started to topple over and so stumbled to the right slightly to remain upright. "..ssso even if sshe does show, she can forgett it!"
Sophie swallowed heavily and shook her head which made her eyes widen, in an attempt to stay compusmentus. She was visibly swaying so Maz held back onto her. The older woman sighed and smoothed her ex's hair. "Okay hun", she said quietly, "okay".
At the back of the room standing, sort of by the bar Sian had come in and was trying to find her girlfriend. Or whom she hoped was still her girlfriend, if even they had got back together. Sian licked her lower lip and squinted her eyes... where are they? Her brow was scrunched up, a little. And then she saw them. Sian instantly smiled as she made out Sophie, and then she made out Maz, who was holding onto her, quite firmly. The blonde remained where she was, she was adamant she wasn't going to get jealous. They were friends, after all.
She remained watching them for some time, remembering how Sophie used to dance, and especially how she used to stumble about when she was drunk..she was doing that a bit now so Sian assumed Soph had had one too many. But that was okay too, as long as they left together.
Some dance track was on and Maz was really going for it. Putting Sophie to shame with her dance moves and it was well cute how Soph was making fun of herself and trying her best to have coordination in her state. The blonde kept giggling and wanted more than anything to just go over and take the brunette in her arms. She was certain Soph would just sink into them, just like she always did when pissed, way back when, and it warmed her soul quite a bit. Sian decided she would wait for the song to end.
And just when it did, and just when Sian was about to go over, that song came on. It stopped the blonde exactly where she was.. it must've been near the end of the night as the slow songs always came on then.. it was Te Amo. And Sian swallowed as she saw Sophie wrap her arms around Maz's neck and hold her close. And Maz held her close right back.
Sian tried to remain cool; tried not to get upset.. Sophie didn't know she was there, after all. If only she saw her surely Soph would come over and take her hand, dance with her to this song, to their song, on the dance floor.
The couple turned and Sophie looked up, in the direction of the bar and her eyes met some blues. Some upset blues.. she knew it even though Sian was right the way across the room. Sophie froze for a moment and just gazed at her. So she was here, finally. The irony wasn't lost on her, even in her drunken state. Maz shifted her head to look at Soph wondering why they had stopped moving. And Sophie simply held her tighter and carried on the slow movement, and then she took her eyes from Sian.
The blonde's chest collapsed and the air expelled from her lungs in a matter of seconds. She was certain her heart had broken in two, in that moment. She couldn't take her eyes from them, and as a few silent tears fell she knew that it was done. If this song meant nothing to Sophie, then that was that.
The couple had done a half turn on the floor and as Maz was contemplating what the hell she was going to do to change Sophie's mind, her eyes suddenly landed on someone who could make it all right. Maz's face lit up. Sian's here! But then she bolted. Maz stood back a little from Soph not really knowing what that was about. "What the?"
Sophie looked at her. "Ay?"
"Sian's here.." she was confused but wasn't going to waste the opportunity. Maz grabbed Sophie's hand and went to go after the blonde.
Sophie pulled back and stopped.
Maz walked right up to her. "C'mon Sian just ran off you've gotta go after her-"
"No!"
"What?" Maz's face was more than confused, she wanted to know what the hell was going on.
"I told you I'm not interested!"
"She looked upset.."
Sophie looked to the floor.
Maz stepped even closer to her. Something had clicked. "Did you know she was here? Soph.. did you see her?"
Her eyes didn't move from the floor.
"SOPHIE!"
Her head snapped up. "Yeah I did! Okay?" Her eyes glared at her ex.
Maz just shook her head and stood with her hands on her hips. She couldn't even bring herself to look at her.
Sophie was angry. "What do you want from me?"
"I want you to sort it out with her!"
"Why? Why are you so bothered?"
Maz held out her hands to either side of Soph, "Cuz I want you to be happy! And I know, alright, that she-" and she pointed to the door, "can make you happy. Is probably the only one that can!"
Sophie searched Maz's eyes and saw that she was deadly serious. And Maz was never serious. At all. Sophie licked her lips.
"You're being stupid, and immature and stubborn. And you're going to let the love of your life walk away from you, 'cuz she thinks you're a twat!" Maz blew out a breath and smiled in sarcasm, "no you are a twat!"
"..thanks".
"Well you are!" Maz was so annoyed she was overly animated. She grabbed Sophie by the arms, "so are you going after her?"
Sophie just looked at the floor, again.
Maz let her go and took a step back. She shook her head in utter contempt. "SOPHIE!" she shouted.
Soph looked up and was catapulted into next week. She had no idea how she wasn't lying on the floor and all she could do was hold her hand to her cheek in complete disbelief of what had just happened. She was certain Maz had just slapped her. But she didn't believe it. But then she had to turn her head around to look at her ex so she must have. And the burning sensation in her face was a big indication.
Sophie looked at Maz with wide eyes. But the older woman was still angry, and she looked ready for round two.
Maz's expression was livid. "GO! Before I throw you after her!"
Suddenly Sophie felt sober and she swallowed the lump in her throat. She looked at Maz before she legged it outside. What the hell was Sian going to think about all this?
Sian had got half way up the street before her legs had slowed her to an eventual stop. Her face was streaked with tears and her chest hitched with shallow breaths. She was in pain. The crippling sensation in her chest wasn't going away and she was guilty with emotions. Had she pushed Sophie into Maz's arms? Should she have got there earlier? Sian hunched over a little bit and gripped the tops of her thighs; her eyes closed and she cried.
Maz sauntered up to the bar and leaned on it. She felt exhausted. She closed her eyes briefly and shook her head. She hoped Sophie would man up and sort it out but it was out of her hands now. Maz cover her face with her palms and then stood up from the bar.
"Now you know how I've felt for the past four years", Rosie said as she stood next to the brunette. Her smile was wide and they shared a sort of mutual regard for how the evening had gone.
"Pretty shitty night huh?" Maz stated, as she tilted her head to look at her.
"Hmm", Rosie hummed, licking her lips. "But it could be on the up..who knows". She looked away and flicked her hair, in that girly flirtatious way.
It caused Maz to grin, a very wide and engaging grin. She swallowed and then gave Rosie her full attention. "Should we, take the party back to yours?" Her grin had turned lopsided.
The older Webster chuckled and looked to the ceiling. Her hands were out in front of her on the bar and she was playing with her fingers. Her tongue poked out briefly. "Oh so you think you could handle me?"
Maz stepped closer. "Babes I'm certain that grin wouldn't leave your face".
Rosie leaned in closer herself, her voice lowered. "And your grin.." she started as she brought her finger up to tap Maz lightly on the chin, "definitely wouldn't leave yours, if you saw me in the morning.."
"Hmmm, yeah?"
Rosie widened her eyes momentarily, "myeh, in my bathrobe..dripping wet hair..."
Maz absently licked her lips at the images. Her chest heaved a little.
"..you wouldn't know what to do with yourself", Rosie's voice was barely above a whisper in the brunettes ear.
Maz lightly cleared her throat and moved her head so they made eye contact. "So, you're feeling a little gay, then?" There was a playful tone to her voice.
Rosie laughed and looked to the front. "No", she smiled, and then looked back. "I'm not gay".
"Ah", Maz breathed in, "just gay for me, then..?"
Rosie momentarily got drawn in by Maz's eyes. They were sparkling. She allowed her thoughts to wonder for a second; the brunettes smile was mesmerising and she was very aware she was sooooo getting caught by it, she couldn't help it. She leaned back in close. "Maybe a little", she answered.
They stared at each other for a few moments; the rest of the club falling away and the rowdiness drowning in insignificance. And then Rosie broke it and picked up her bag. "But I don't think I can do that to my sister", she breathed, and she began to move away. Rosie smiled. "Sorry, amigo", she finished as she walked away.
Maz closed her eyes but her smile remained. "Yeah", she sighed. "I should be so lucky". And after a second or two she followed Rosie out the door.
Sian decided she shouldn't take it. Sophie was punishing her, and she didn't deserve it. She should go back in there and give that girl a piece of her mind! The blonde stood up straight, wiped the tears from her eyes and spun around-
Sophie was there.
It knocked the determination flat out of Sian. She was suddenly unsure and all there was only silence and ten feet of open space between them. The blonde swallowed. And it hurt.
Sophie found herself in a familiar place...Sian upset before her, and in all likelihood more than 50% her fault. Maybe 80%... She never intended too, but she always managed to get the blonde in tears due to her stupid pigheadedness. The irony of it being all she wanted to do was make her happy, see her smile every day, and know she was the reason for it. But instead she knew she was the reason for the tears and the misery and it was the worst kind of punishment..no harsh words, no arguments, just her girl standing all broken in front of her. And it was all, her... fault.
In an instant the emotion had escalated within the brunette; her eyes started to water, her chest began to hurt, her throat was suddenly sore and her breathing was distorted. She licked her lips as they had gone dry and her hands had started to shake. More significantly however she could hear her heartbeat thudding in her ears and she knew she had to change. She would stop being stubborn, stop ignoring what was happening in front of her and go after what she wanted. Sophie took in a deep breath; she was stupid not letting Sian know how important she was to her, and how she couldn't live without her, how she didn't want too.. Sophie took a deep breath and a few steps towards Sian. She did it slowly, as if terrified the blonde would bolt without giving her a chance. Another chance, the last chance she would ever need. Soph was determined; this was the moment her life would change for the better, and she would make the blonde happier than she had ever been. She stuck her chin out, she was resolute. And she would make Sian believe her.
Sian got nervous as Sophie began walking towards her; her insides felt like they were on edge and she could feel the blood pumping feverishly around her body. Her instinct was to run but her feet refused to move, however. She found it very unfair that when she was angry, all she could be was upset. She wanted to yell and scream and drill into Soph exactly how she made her feel. But she couldn't, as soon as she looked into those eyes she melted, and something within her retreated away. Maybe it was because she loved her so much she could forgive anything. She could withstand anything, being made to feel like utter crap one of them. But her brain told her she shouldn't, that she wasn't a doormat and she was better than how Soph sometimes made her feel. That was all her brain had told her in those last few years before she left. But her heart wouldn't be told and insisted on being taken in, like she was there, and the romantic inside of her hoped and prayed for a gentle word and a soothing touch that would turn this into a happy ending. She wasn't sure what Sophie could say to make this right.. the blonde's mind was running away with itself with all kinds of scenarios, both positive and negative ones. Already she had come of out of this situation both heartbroken and happier than she had ever been, all kinds of words exchanged and two versions of Sophie that she knew full well existed. Sian knew which one she wanted right now, but she wasn't sure if Sophie had it in her, to be that kind, loving, caring girl she had fallen in love with, way back when. Sian licked her lips briefly and swallowed down a breath. She fidgeted as the brunette came to a stop just in front of her, just out of arms reach. The blonde had tensed herself, ready for anything Soph could say. She wasn't sure how she would cope, she was already close to tears. Sophie had been horrid inside the club, and that was just with a look. That's all it took, somehow, Sian felt like this was it. She held her breath, for what felt like an eternity.
Sophie was upset. Sian looked broken and the brunette knew she would be tearing herself up on the inside. That slap Maz had given her was truly deserved. And she probably deserved far more. She was certain she would kick herself from now until forever but regardless, that didn't matter now. She would spend the rest of her life treating Sian like a princess. Starting right now.
"I'm sorry", Sophie breathed. It wasn't loud and it was so filled with emotion that the words barely made it out. Sian's eyes looked surprised, like it was the last thing she was expecting, but Soph carried on regardless. "I'm a twat, and I've treated you badly, like I did before, and I'm so, sooo sorry". Her voice was firmer now, and she took another half step towards her girlfriend. Sian didn't move, her feet were glued to the spot and her eyes were transfixed on Soph's.
"I've spent all this time, worried that it would end up the same, but I know I'm the reason it ended like it did. I know I ran away from you long before you ran away from me-" her voice cracked again as the memories came back and she fidgeted a bit, pushing her fingertips into her palms. "..and I let you think I didn't love you. When I did", Sophie's eyes filled up and she made a concerted effort not to cry. Her pitch went high all the same. "..very much. I've always loved you, you're the one for me Sian". She had to pause to take some breaths in as her chest began to feel heavy. She glanced at the blonde who was hanging on every word. Her expression a mixture of surprise and compassion. It was something Sophie loved about her but supposed she had always took for granted; Sian was always an extremely caring person, no matter how she was being treated. Soph always felt the love from her, and she was determined to do exactly the same in return now. Sophie took a deep breath and tried at a smile. "I just always, I don't know.." she looked at the ground, "hated myself for messing everything up. I knew I was doing it, knew I was pushing you away, just like I knew that's what I did in there..." she gestured towards the club and then looked into Sian's eyes. She evened her tone out and spoke with conviction. "But if you let me, I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you".
Sian felt her heartbreak. But in an exceptionally good way. If she was dreaming this, she never wanted to wake up. Everything she had ever wanted to hear Sophie say had just come from her lips. Sian's face was half crumbling as she fought to hold onto her emotions; her lips were turned up in a sort of smile and her eyes were threatening to let go all of what she was feeling.
Sophie gently reached across the open space and squeezed Sian's hand. She entwined their fingers and the blonde just couldn't deal with it. The tears slowly started to trickle down her face and Sophie's heart literally hurt, "babe", she whispered as she stepped even closer. "Believe me, I'll do anything you want.." herself on the verge of tears, "just don't leave me, please?"
Sian brought her spare hand to her forehead in one last vain attempt to compose herself before she completely crumbled. She flung her arms around Sophie's neck as she let the tears come and literally broke down in the brunettes embrace. She cried for the last nine years of hurt and of missing the one person who had the power to do this to her. And now she had everything she wanted. She trusted Sophie through and through and just knew this time it would be different. She felt her body sink against the brunette's and felt Sophie's hands gently sooth her back as she let the tears cry everything negative out of her.
After a few minutes Sian felt her body relax and she sniffed back some breaths. "I'm not gunna leave you", she said into Soph's ear, "I love you, too". She brought her head up and rested it against Soph's forehead and for the first time, in a long time, she smiled like everything would be ok.
Sophie was smiling from ear to ear and her heart pounded so fast she thought she might pass out. She gently kissed Sian's nose and then brushed their lips together sweetly and they froze like that, as if they were caught in a moment that they had waited a lifetime for. Sophie felt like she had. Her hands cupped Sian's cheeks and then she moved them down to her waist, gently grabbing at the blonde's leather jacket as she slowly began to move her lips and treasured the feeling of Sian's lower lip between hers.
It was magical. But Sophie's thoughts didn't stay there for long. She swallowed almost in slow motion and thought about taking Sian there and then. The jacket was clenched between her fists as she used it to hold Sian's body to hers, as close as she could get it. Sophie ran her tongue over the lip that was between her and it caused Sian's eyes to open. She looked at the brunette and a grin touched at her lips. She was so close she could feel the breath when Soph breathed out and Sian could see the desire in her expression, as her head remained slightly tilted and her eyes closed.
"Let's go home", Sophie breathed, and then her eyes opened.
"Home?" Sian asked. Her voice was quiet and filled with emotion.
Sophie's hand came up to rest in the blonde's hair. "The flat", she answered as she gently pulled her fingers through it.
She couldn't believe it, and she wanted to make sure she had heard right. Her voice was barely above a whisper, "are you sure?"
Sophie breathed in and looked her girlfriend in the eye. "I want to go home with you, and make love to you in our bed, all night. And every night for as long as you'll let me".
Sian's heart leapt in her chest and her smile couldn't contain what she was feeling. Her head was almost spinning with it. She lowered her hand and took Sophie's fingers in her own and shyly bit on her lip. She saw the need in Soph's eyes and it made her stomach feel funny; the memory of how turned on the brunette's words used to get her was coming rushing back and she just couldn't wait to feel Sophie all over her again. Sian raised an eyebrow as her gaze lowered and she felt her heart start to beat rapidly as the images of Soph being naked came back to her. And that was it.
"Let's go", she whispered cheekily.