Sirius never wanted to let go of Remus. It had been twelve long, painful, lonely years since he had felt the warmth of Remus, and a few seconds wasn't nearly enough to even begin making up for it.
But the girl's – Hermione's – scream jolted him back to reality, and he let Remus pull away, resisting the impulse to grab him back into his arms where he belonged.
"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" she screamed, pointing at him with a wild look in her eyes and her hair askew. "You – you – "
"Hermione – " Remus tried to speak, but she cut him off.
" – you and him!"
"Hermione, calm down – "
"I didn't tell anyone! I've been covering up for you – " As Hermione continued to shriek hysterically, for a wild moment Sirius thought she had realized that Remus and he were gay and was having a violent reaction to it. He quickly dismissed the fancy, however, and realized what she was actually referring to. He mentally chastised himself, feeling out of sorts and as though he hadn't been in proper society for years. Which, truthfully, he hadn't. But now he had lost track of the conversation, and he hastened to hear what Remus was saying.
"..listen to me, please! I can explain – "
This time it was Harry, not Hermione, who cut him off. "I trusted you.. and all the time you've been his friend!" his voice was wavering furiously, and Sirius felt a wash of emotion flow over him as he realized how very like James he was. Even his anger was the same, the way he shook furiously. Although the flashing green eyes was pure Lily.
"You're wrong. I haven't been Sirius's friend, but I am now – Let me explain.."
"NO!" Hermione was still hysterical. "Harry, don't trust him, he's been helping Black get into the castle, he wants you dead too – he's a werewolf!"
There was silence. The three students looked at Remus, aghast, and Sirius felt a familiar anger grow over him. How dare they judge him, hate him, and fear him, simply because of something he couldn't control –
"Not at all up to your usual standard, Hermione; only one out of three, I'm afraid. I have not been helping Sirius get into the castle and I certainly don't want Harry dead.. but I won't deny that I'm a werewolf." A shiver ran down Remus's spine, and he paled visibly.
The ginger boy reacted violently to this, trying to get up and away from Remus, who lurched toward him, concerned, only to fall back when the boy yelled, "Get away from me, werewolf!"
This show of anti-werewolf sentiment fueled another wave of anger for Sirius. The emotions of this evening – seeing Remus again, and Harry for the first time, as well as Peter, and trying to keep Harry from killing him while he tried to explain the truth and kill Peter, on top of his old hatreds and prejudices coming back, and hysterical screaming – it was too much for Sirius, whose greatest social interactions for the past few years had been limited to dementors and cats, as well as the occasionally teenager. Despite the seriousness of the situation, he had to close his eyes and breathe deeply. This evening had been taxing so far, and he hadn't realized how weak he had grown. Eating little to nothing and spending too much time as a dog would do that to you, he thought darkly, as well as spending more than ten years with dementors breathing down your neck.
When Sirius opened his eyes again, he had missed great chunks of the conversation, and the redheaded boy was holding Peter by the tail while Remus was starting at the rat intently.
After a pause, the redheaded boy spoke shakily, his face pale from pain. "What? What's my rat got to do with anything?"
"That's not a rat." Everyone looked at him, and he realized that he was the one who had spoken, an awful croaking sound that sounded nothing like his suave silken voice from years past. Not for the first time, some of Sirius's vanity rebelled, lamenting at his stolen youth. He pushed the thoughts away though.
Remus stared at him, startled at hearing the sound of his voice after so long, as the redheaded boy stuttered. "What d'you mean – of course he's a rat – "
"No, he's not. He's a wizard," said Remus quietly.
"An animagus, by the name of Peter Pettigrew," said Sirius, and at last the truth came out.
It took a long time to explain the entire story, with much anger and impatience on Sirius's side as well as confusion, doubt, and reluctance from the students and even Remus. The two men told it together, going back to the beginning, explaining about Remus's condition and how the three boys had become animagus for him. Before they could get to Sirius's part in the story, however, a new face arrived at the shack, using the invisibility cloak as a disguise.
When Snape appeared Sirius was jolted with all of his old hatred and loathing. He stood there, shaking with anger, as Snape jeered and slimed about, ignoring all of their attempted reasoning. Ultimately, before Sirius could do anything, the three students knocked Snape out with a tri-fold Expelliarmus curse.
"You shouldn't have done that," said Sirius after a few heartbeats of silence. "You should have left him up to me.."
Neither Harry nor his friend responded, and the girl whimpered to herself, thinking about what she had just done. Sirius stooped down and untied the bonds that Snape had jinxed onto Remus.
But even though the students had attacked Snape for them – had apparently been on their side – they still would not believe the truth about Peter. So Sirius had to tell his part of the story, impatiently recounting how he had tracked Peter down and had instead been blamed for the crime; how he had suffered in Azkaban but had ultimately regained his powers and had managed to escape, and what he had been doing for the past year. Sirius saw Remus's face darken with emotion and sadness as he heard of all of Sirius's pain and the horrible things that he had been through. But finally the students allowed the two men to prove their point, by forcing Peter to change himself from a rat back into a man.
With a flash of blue-light white, the rat was forced out of his form and suddenly, in front of Sirius was Peter Pettigrew, perhaps the man that Sirius hated most in the world.
After more tedious but regretfully necessary truth telling, Sirius knew that he could say no more to prove his point.
"Believe me," he croaked. "Believe me, Harry. I never betrayed James and Lily. I would have died before I betrayed them."
And Harry nodded. Peter fell to his knees and let out a horrid, hoarse cry. He shuffled forward towards Sirius, muttering, "Sirius – it's me.. it's Peter.. your friend.. you wouldn't.."
Sirius narrowed his eyes, lashing out at him. "There's enough filth on my robes without you touching them," he spat, venom in his every syllable. This was man who had ruined his life and had killed his friends; and for that, he must die.
Peter turned to Remus. "Remus! You don't believe this.. wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?"
"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter. I assume that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?"
They locked eyes, but they both knew it wasn't true. Sirius had forbidden himself from telling anyone else, knowing that the fewer people who knew the better. And despite Sirius's deep belief that Remus could be trusted above all other people, he had been reluctant to tell him. The more people who knew the more dangerous it became. And Sirius did not want to put Remus in unnecessary danger. He now regretted this, but there was nothing that could be done. Remus smiled at him, and a ghost of a smile flitted across Sirius's gaunt face. There was no need to go into the details in front of the students – it was neater if they skipped over their relationship entirely.
"Forgive me, Remus," he said, almost mockingly.
"Not at all, Padfoot, old friend. And will you, in turn, forgive me for believe you were the spy?"
"Of course. Shall we kill him together?" for a moment he felt overcome with the thought of Remus believing that he was a traitor for so many years; but perhaps not, perhaps Remus had refused to believe so? He would have to ask him later, although he wasn't sure he wanted to know. But he pushed the thought away, instead being swept up in emotion. Now, finally, justice was coming. Peter was at an end.
"Yes, I think so." Remus was grim now, precise. He, unlike Sirius, would not enjoy the grisly end that was awaiting their old friend.
"You wouldn't..you won't.." panted Peter, who scrambled to Ron and Hermione, pleading with both of them in turn for help. Finally he turned to Harry, whimpering, "Harry.. Harry.. you look just like your father.. just like him.."
It was too much for Sirius, who had allowed Peter's sniveling to the other two, and he roared, "HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO HARRY? HOW DARE YOU FACE HIM? HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT JAMES IN FRONT OF HIM?"
Peter ignored this, and instead, terrified, reached out to Harry, whispering, "Harry – Harry, James wouldn't have wanted me killed.. James would have understood, Harry.. he would have shown me mercy.."
Remus and Sirius strode forward and threw Peter to the ground. They forced the truth out of him, and finally he confessed.
"He – he was taking over everywhere! Wh – what was there to be gained by refusing him?"
"What was there to be gained by fighting the most evil wizard who has ever existed?" asked Sirus, a terrible fury in his face, nearly overcome with anger. "Only innocent lives, Peter!"
"You don't understand! He would have killed me, Sirius!"
"THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED! DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOUR FRIENDS, AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!"
Sirius stood panting, his wand hand trembling. Remus came up beside him, and they stood shoulder to shoulder, wands raised.
"You should have realized, if Voldemort didn't kill you, we would. Good-bye, Peter."
Sirius raised his arm at the same time as Remus, but before they could kill Peter, Harry ran forward, placing himself between Peter and their wands.
"NO! You can't kill him. You can't."
Sirius reluctantly lowered his wand, staggered. What in Merlin's name was Harry thinking? "Harry, this piece of vermin is the reason you have no parents," he snarled. "This cringing bit of filth would have seen you to die too, without turning a hair. You heard him. His own stinking skin meant more to him than your whole family."
"I know," panted Harry. "We'll take him up to the castle. We'll hand him over to the dementors..he can go to Azkaban..but don't kill him."
"Harry!" gasped Peter, pushing forward to kneel in front of Harry. "You – thank you – it's more than I deserve – thank you – "
Harry pushed him away, spitting out, "Get off me. I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it because – I don't reckon my dad would've wanted them to become killers – just for you."
There was silence. Sirius, although still fuming with hatred for Peter, was impressed by Harry's nobility. Still, though, he had to give it one last chance. Perhaps he could still kill this piece of filth. "You're the only person who has the right to decide, Harry. But think.. think what he did.."
"He can go to Azkaban. If anyone deserves the place, he does.."
And so Sirius let it go. He gave up on the one driving force behind the past year – killing Peter – and instead settled for justice.
Remus tied him up, and Sirius sagged, suddenly relieved and exhausted. He watched fondly as Remus bustled around in a businesslike way, putting a splint on Ron and tying up Snape. Sirius turned away to look at Peter, and he nudged him with his toe. "And two of us should be chained to this. Just to make sure."
Remus and Ron volunteered, and Sirius conjured heavy black manacles to chain Peter to Remus and Ron. With Crookshanks leading the way, they walked out of the Shrieking Shack.
It was a very awkward procession, but somehow they managed it. Sirius ended up in front of Harry, and he took the chance to speak to his godson face to face for what seemed like the first time. Struck with sudden inspiration, he offered Harry a home to live in. He was sure Remus wouldn't mind, and to his delight Harry seemed eager at the idea. Sirius smiled for the first time in years, a true, brilliant smile of his youth.
But as they reached the outside, things began to go wrong, starting with the movement of a cloud. The full moon was revealed, bathing the party in moonlight.
Sirius's eyes widened and he flung out an arm to make Harry and Hermione stop. Remus had gone rigid, and his limbs began to shake. The girl said something, but Sirius couldn't hear what she said over his loud heartbeat.
"Run," he whispered. "Run. Now."
But Harry disobeyed, instead leaping forward to help his friend. Sirius caught him and threw him back, yelling, "Leave it to me – RUN!"
There was a snarling noise as Remus began the painful transformation into a werewolf. Sirius's heart went out to him, knowing the pain that Remus must be going through, but he couldn't focus on that. Instead, he himself transformed became once more the bearlike dog. As Remus-the-werewolf wrenched free of the manacle, Sirius seized him about the neck and pulled him backward, away from the students. They were locked, jaw to jaw, ripping at each other with their claws, fighting, hissing, howling –
Remus broke free of Sirius's grasp and slashed a claw once, twice against Sirius's muzzle, then against his back, letting out a howl. Sirius growled in return, but he couldn't bring himself to harm Remus. Instead he swiped at him, pushing him away harmlessly, and Remus took off, galloping away into the forest.
Sirius licked his wounds, but before he could transform back he heard Harry yell, "Sirius, he's gone, Pettigrew transformed!"
At once Sirius was off, lifting his nose to the wind and scenting out Peter. The trail led towards the lake, and Sirius followed it, bounding forward, hatred fueling his paw-steps..
He came to an abrupt stop at the edge of the lake, and he suddenly felt a familiar feeling of cold and of horror –
He looked up, and surely enough there were dementors. But not one, or a few, there were at least a hundred of them, gliding in a black mass around the lake towards him. He let out a yelp, and a whine as he was brought to his knees, and then somehow managed to change back into Sirius, himself, a human.
Sirius was forced down, crouching on all fours, his hands on his head. "Nooo. Nooooo.. please.." he moaned as horrible thoughts choked him, all of the unhappiness in his life burrowing its way into his head. You're a disappointment to your family, you faggot; you killed your friends and ruined the one man who could ever love you – you couldn't even accomplish what you set out to do, you let Pettigrew escape..
The thoughts washed over him and he gave a shudder, falling still. He could just see a cold, clammy hand reaching out for him, lowering its hood, letting out a rattle and sucking out the air..
And then he knew no more.
When he came to, he was locked in an office high up on a tower in Hogwarts. Sirius sat up with a start and looked around wildly, but before he could do anything he caught sight of Dumbledore and Fudge. Dumbledore was looking at Sirius with concern, but the look of Fudge's face could not be described as anything but smug.
"Are you alright, Sirius?" asked Dumbledore pleasantly, looking concerned. Fudge looked at Dumbledore sharply, as though this was not a matter of concern. Sirius just waved a hand wildly and spoke rapidly, with the air of a man who was trapped. "You have to listen to me – please, Dumbledore, I can explain – it was Peter, he was a rat, we were all animagus – "
Fudge scowled and stood up. "You dare to try and blame Peter Pettigrew for your – your horrible deeds? You dare to try and make up excuses for what – " he seemed to be overcome with emotion and wrung his hat in his hands, speechless.
Dumbledore looked at Sirius intently. "Please, Sirius, start from the beginning. No, Minister, let him give his side of the story. I do believe that one convicted is allowed to give a case?"
"Sirius Black was already tried and found guilty!" protested Fudge.
"I believe," said Dumbledore softly but with an edge to his voice, "that Sirius was never given a trial."
Fudge sat down, once more speechless. Looking at Dumbledore wordlessly, Sirius hoped that his gratitude somehow could get through. Dumbledore just looked at him sternly, and once more Sirius retold his tale, living through it a second time that night.
At the end, there was silence.
"Nonsense!" sputtered Fudge finally. "This is all utter nonsense. It's – it's preposterous to believe that three fifteen year old boys could hoodwink the ministry regulations and manage to become animagus. And that a grown man would masquerade as a rat for twelve years; in addition to fooling fifty muggles and wizards into believing that someone else had killed him.." he trailed off, and looked anxiously at Dumbledore.
Sirius held his breath. Surely Dumbledore, the man who knew everything and who was wise, and kind, and good – surely Dumbledore believed him?
Dumbledore lifted his bowed head and looked at Sirius as though he were x-raying him, his blue eyes intent and serious. Sirius felt as though he were a student again. Finally Dumbledore nodded, and stood up. "Come, Fudge, there are matters to attend to."
Sirius wilted in his chair. Fudge leapt up quickly. "Yes, yes, I'll go have the dementors rounded up. I suppose they'll want to perform the kiss at once."
But Dumbledore shook his head. "Perhaps," he said, "We should check on Mr. Potter and his friends, first."
Fudge blinked, but walked out of the room muttering and nodding his head in agreement.
Dumbledore walked out behind Fudge, stopping once to give Sirius another look that managed to reassure Sirius more than any word ever could. He mouthed, Wait, to him, and then closed and locked the door.
Sirius leapt up and began pacing the room, checking the window and the door (both locked) and wondering what was going to happen. What had Dumbledore meant? How was he possibly going to get him out of this mess? Had he even believed him? Questions rolled around impatiently in his mind, and then he thought of Remus. He sat back with a groan, wondering what had happened to him and if he would ever see him again. It had felt wonderful to hug Remus again, to feel his warmth against him – but was it the last time he would be able to?
He began to pace again, fearing for his life. But hardly five minutes had passed when a tap came on the window. Sirius looked up, and then his jaw dropped – for there was Harry and Hermione, hovering in the air ontop of a hippogriff.
The window sprang open, and Sirius stared openmouthed up at Harry. "How – how – ?" he asked weakly. Harry shook his head. "Get on – there's not much time. You've got to get out of here – the dementors are coming – Macnair's gone to get them."
Sirius heaved himself out of the window and managed to pull himself onto the hippogriff behind Hermione. Harry urged on the hippogriff – whose name was Buckbeak – and the great beast swept upward into the air, soaring higher and higher until in landed with a clatter on the battlements of the top of the West Tower.
Harry and Hermione slid off at once, and then turned to face Sirius. "Sirius, you'd better go, quick," panted Harry. "They'll reach Flitwick's office any moment, they'll find out you're gone."
But Sirius couldn't bring himself to leave, not yet. "What happened to the other boy? Ron?"
"He's going to be okay. He's still out of it, but Madam Pomfrey says she'll be able to make him better. Quick – go – "
Still, Sirius was staring down at his Godson, drinking his essence in, his similarity to James.
"How can I ever thank – "
"GO!" shouted both Harry and Hermione.
Sirius wheeled Buckbeak around, and suddenly he was facing the open sky.
"We'll see each other again. You are – truly your father's son, Harry.."
And then he squeezed Buckbeak's sides with his heels, and they took off into the open sky and into freedom.
I'm sorry; I know this is a fairly short chapter, and that it's been overdue, not to mention that it sucks. I've just kept putting it off. After all, everyone already knows what happens in this part of the book, so I've had very little muse to continue writing – because, in my opinion, the point of a fanfiction is to explore other stories and relationships that a book doesn't go into. And then on top of that, even after I wrote it, my fanfiction account spazzed out and wouldn't let me post it. Nonetheless, it's finally done! And I promise, the next chapter will be more interesting and will focus back on Sirius and Remus's relationship, brief though it may be, in the years before the fifth book and the final climax!
As always, thanks for reading and commenting, and just remember that much of the content and all of the characters come from the wonderful brain of J. K. Rowling.
