Yay! More reviews! Thank you everyone! No B.S. this time. I'll just let you get to the story.
Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight things. I only have some truly strange baby cravings...pickles with bananas. Eeeuuugh.
XOXO-Ka
Right Vs. Good
by: JudeOrion
Chapter 8: Perfect Snow Angels
I hated how weak I became. Over the years I had become self-sufficient. I could do everything on my own, even change my own tire. In the snow on a mountain pass. How many women could say they did that single-handedly? But when it came to the Cullens being back in my life? It seemed like I couldn't do anything on my own.
I held my cell phone in my hand, bit the bullet, and pressed call. The voice on the other end answered immediately.
"Hello?"
"I need you. Please come over, I can't finish this on my own. I just don't even know where to start this time."
"Five minutes," came the excited voice. I could hear the purr of an engine on the other line. "Be ready. Don't even bother putting anything on."
"Thank you," I exhaled. I sat on my bed only wearing lacy blue panties and a matching bra. I heard the door open and slam closed, and the sound of hurried footsteps on the hallway, uncharacteristically loud for a vampire.
My own bedroom door burst open.
"Where do I start?" Alice asked. "You should have called earlier. Look at you, you didn't even attempt to do your hair!"
"Thank you so much, Alice. I owe you," I groveled, silently praying that she wouldn't take it as invite to pick out my daily outfits. That was the last thing I needed.
"Please. You know I love doing this. I just wish you had given me time to do more. Why did you even call me? Not that I'm not thrilled, but your fashion sense has gotten so much better as you've grown up. You don't really even need my advice anymore." She looked kind of happy-melancholy, like my dad looked when I went off to college.
"I'm meeting Josh's parents tonight. I need to look good. I'm terrified, this is the first time I've met a guy's parents after we've gotten to the 'boyfriend-girlfriend' stage. I'm terrified it's going to be like a bad sitcom, she's going to say I look like a man and turn around an hour later and ask me if I got my outfit from Lindsay Lohan's line! What if she convinces Josh I'm no good for him?" On the other hand, what if Alice picked out something even worse and Mrs. Watson thought I was trampier than I would have been picking out my own clothes? Or too frumpy, I think that would be worse…
"Don't worry, Bella," Alice laughed. "I will make sure you look wonderful. I have the perfect thing in mind. She rummaged in the top drawer of my dresser and pulled out a package of leggings. "Put those on," she commanded. I obeyed without hesitation. They were black, and had a lacy flowery design. They scratched my skin slightly, but didn't itch thank God.
"This." She didn't bother to look at me, just held out a long, deep plum satiny shirt with a short Mandarin collar. It sort of came in at my waist and flowed down. It covered down to my mid-thigh. Alice set a pair of black patent pumps in front of me and then drug me into the bathroom before I could even slip the second shoe all the way on.
An hour later, when Josh opened my front door with a fall bouquet in his hand, I knew that giving into my weaknesses had been the right thing to do. His appreciative, almost caveman stare put to rest any qualms I had about wearing something so short. I'd fought Alice on only wearing the shirt, but she wasn't giving in.
"It's a shirt-dress, Bella. It's supposed to be either long shirt or short skirt, depending on what else you wear with it."
"Ok, so make it a shirt!"
"Be a big girl Bella, don't pout."
I just glared at her has she continued to do my hair.
"Wow, Bells. You look…incredible."
"Thanks. All the credit goes to Alice."
"Was that her Porsche leaving the lot?" he asked in wonder as I locked the door behind me.
I rolled my eyes. "Probably. Her family loves fancy cars." He whistled low as he led me down the stairs.
We were half way to his parent's house when Josh spoke again. "So…I should probably let you know…my family can be kind of loud. And outrageous."
"Oh."
He laughed. "Don't look so scared, Bells. They'll love you, I know it. Just be yourself." A bit later he pulled up to a small house on the west side of town, by the high school. A little white dog came crashing to the chain-link fence, yapping frantically. "That's Ginger. Don't worry, she's harmless." True enough, the second we were in the fence, Ginger's attack maneuver was to roll on her back and beg for tummy rubs. Josh obliged; I didn't want to risk either my skirt coming up or me falling down on these ridiculous heels.
"Come on," Josh beckoned. He took my hand and led me up the stairs onto a small porch, then through the front door. In front of me was a living room with two recliners and a short couch, and a few added folding chairs. The carpet was brown, a little too long to be modern, but not shag either. The walls were white, and there were at least three bookshelves crammed into a tiny corner with one of the recliners. The shelves were totally filled up, and stacks more lay on the floor.
"Mom, where are you?" Josh called out.
"Kitchen!" Came a call from the back of the house. Josh smiled at me and headed back there. We passed a staircase to the right, and another room that was probably supposed to be a dining room, but held a table with phone stuff, another couple of chairs, a china hutch and some sort of exercise machine. A small hallway led to what I presumed was the bathroom. Directly in front of us was the kitchen, lots of counter space filled with appliances and mouthwatering dishes. A woman stood at the stove, stirring something in a saucepan vigorously. She was a bit of a larger woman, with short brown hair and, when she turned around, a very welcoming face.
"Hey, sweetie. Just let me finish this up." She kept stirring for another thirty seconds or so before pouring whatever was in the saucepan onto the turkey in the oven. She closed the oven door, set the timer, and turned, wiping her hands on a towel. She came to give Josh a hug first, then came at me with outstretched arms. "You must be Bella. We've heard so many things about you. Finally I get to meet the woman behind the stories."
"What have you told her?" I asked Josh in a threatening voice.
Josh's mom laughed merrily. "Only good things, I assure you." She let me go and stood back. "Although you're right, she's so thin!" she said. I blushed and looked down. I'd gained weight after having the kids, but I was still kind of skinny, it was true. "Well, what would you like to drink, Bella? We've got soda, water, milk, I think Dale's got a couple of beers in the fridge in the garage."
"Um…soda sounds fine. Thank you, Mrs. Watson."
"Karen," she corrected me kindly. "Coke or cherry Coke, Sprite, Dr. Pepper?"
My head reeled. "Coke. Please."
She handed me a can from the fridge just as a timer went off on the stove. She hurried over to it. She was sweet; not like the nightmare I'd imagined. She kind of reminded me of Mrs. Weasley from the Harry Potter books. I smiled at Josh, which made him beam back at me.
"Where's Dad?" he asked.
"He went to Grandma's to help take everyone over. Donna blew a tire just as she got here, and she can't get to a shop until Monday; every where's closed until then. There aren't really enough cars for everyone else since Trisha and Saul flew."
"Ok. That was lucky it only blew on the way in."
"Yes, it was. She had just gotten to the hill before Grandpa's store so he came up and helped her change the tire and switched cars with her so she could get to their place safely."
"That's good. I'm going to show Bella around before the mob gets here, ok?"
"Ok."
Josh put his hand on the small of my back and led me out of the kitchen. He took me down the short hallway I had noticed earlier. True to my guess, there was a bathroom on the left and door directly across from that; a door was on the other wall, closed.
"Bathroom, as you can see," he said, then squeezed by me to open the door across from us. "Computer room. It's uh…yeah." I could see what he couldn't quite get out. It was a mess, simply put. There were another two bookshelves behind the door, tubs marked BOOKS stacked everywhere, the computer desk left little room for the keyboard under the paper, and just random stuff was everywhere. A tiny TV was perched haphazardly on a stack of boxes.
"She usually keeps a really tidy house. This room just compensates for the cleanliness."
I couldn't help giggling.
"Here, I'll show you the dungeon."
"Dungeon? You aren't going to tie me up with chains and stuff are you?"
Josh put a smirk on his face and bent to kiss me. "Hmm…Could be fun."
"Haha." The sarcasm was lost under an assault from Josh's lips, however. He broke away all too soon and took my hand.
"Come on. Before I do something stupid in my parent's house." He shut the door behind him and opened up the other one to the left. "Careful. The stairs are steep." He led me into the basement. I couldn't help but gasp. In front of me, spanning the whole south wall of the house was a ceiling-to-floor row of bookshelves, full of movies.
"What is this?"
"My dad's pride and joy. He hasn't even taken half of these out of the case, I think."
"How many are there?" I went to the end of the row, and peeked behind it. Another row was filled up against the wall, only half as short as the one in front.
"I think about three thousand. That was last year, though. We have a 'counting party' every first of the year." My eyes bugged out at him.
"Shit. Are these beta tapes?" I fingered a couple on the inside row.
"Yeah. VHS's and Betas are here. The other row is purely DVD's."
"Crap. This is what your dad does in his free time?" I asked.
"Yep. And he knows what he has and doesn't have in his head. He had some kind of brain injury when he was in middle school. Because of it he has a lot of trouble reading, and he can't really do math, but it's incredible how the brain makes up for those sort of things in other areas. He's able to remember all this off the top of his head. Among other things." I suddenly heard voices and creaking footsteps above us. "Sounds like the family's here. Ready?"
"Not even a little bit. Let's go."
The words sounded vaguely familiar as they rolled off my tongue.
"She wore those stinkin' pants every day, I swear!" Karen passed me the picture she was holding. There stood a young Trisha, Karen's sister, leaning against a railing outside wearing Coca-Cola bellbottoms. I couldn't help but giggle. We were crammed in the tiny living room. Josh had a big family. And this was just the immediate family of his mother's side. He had three aunts and one uncle, all married except one aunt. So that's seven people. Add in five cousins (there were four more from previous marriages not there). Make that twelve people—just in the room. His grandparents, too, with his great-grandma, and Dale's parents. Seventeen. With Josh, his parents, and I, that put twenty-one people in this small house. Not to mention that Josh had a brother coming back tomorrow on leave from the army.
I did not do well in crowds, especially where I didn't know the people. But Josh's family was welcoming to the umpteenth degree. They were a stout family; I mean, you could tell they had the direct Swiss heritage they claimed to have. The men were burly and hairy, and the women were motherly. You couldn't resist one of their tight hugs. Jovial was the word that best fit them. And Nana! The woman was Josh's great-grandma, and still snappy and sarcastic, with a hint of her European accent lingering in her voice. She used a walker with a chair attached to it to get around. Nana kind of reminded me some of my friend Jake's dad. Resilient, observant, and eager to join in the festivities, able to come up with a way to be a part of them even if their bodies wouldn't cooperate perfectly.
Dale's parents, on the other hand, were the opposite. Bob was quiet, with a sour look on his face constantly, grumbling and bumbling around. He couldn't fool anyone, though. It was plain by the way he treated the dog and the way he looked and half-smiled at the kids playing by the stairs. He was a marshmallow. His wife was constantly asking, "would anyone like anything else? I'm going to the kitchen, are you sure I couldn't get anyone anything? I can cut up a piece of turkey or pie if anyone's hungry. I can make up some cider or cocoa." She got on Karen's nerves a bit, probably because it was Karen's house and not Anna's. I couldn't help but accept her offers even though I was stuffed. She looked absolutely crestfallen if she was denied the ability to do something for someone.
It was hot in the living room, so I grabbed Josh's jacket, which was a bit lighter than my own (and smelled much better, I thought) and went out the back door, hidden by the kitchen. It was snowing again, and this time it was sticking. There was already a good half-foot on the ground from the day. I couldn't help it—I laid down in the snow and started moving my arms around. I heard the door close and looked up. Josh was standing in the glow from the porch light.
"Hey, angel." I giggled. "Too many people in there?"
"Not exactly. Just warm."
"Yeah, it gets that way. You should see when the rest of my cousins are here. It's downright nuts. And Christmas! Forget it!" he laughed and extended his hand out to me. I took it and jumped up, careful not to let my feet in my masterpiece. Josh spun me around into his arms; I could feel his breath tickling my ear.
"Look at that. A perfect angel."
"Yep."
"I don't mean the one in the snow." I blushed but didn't speak. I leaned my head back onto his shoulder, looking up at the overcast sky reflecting the snow.
"Bella?"
"Hmm?"
"I love you."
My heart sped up. This was the first time he had told me this. Things had been getting heated since we started dating. We were coming closer and closer, both emotionally and physically. I was in love with him, but had yet to say it. I was scared of the phrase, downright terrified I admit. I didn't know what it meant to Josh. I hadn't felt it with Mike, not at all, I knew that. With Edward? It was…I don't know. Unhealthy obsession, maybe? Mixed with the love, of course. It was out of control, insane, consuming, and I was scared to feel like that again.
What I felt with Josh was simpler, more comfortable, and safer. It was comforting. It was like a fire in a hearth compared to the raging bonfire that was Edward. I felt like I did love him. I cared deeply. We got on well, had lots in common. He made the butterflies in my stomach come alive every time he touched me. He made my blood boil when he really put his hands on me. And, probably the most important, I wanted to be with him. All the time. I missed him terribly when he wasn't there, and I often made excuses to drop by the diner to see him, or to drop by his house, anything to see him would do.
Josh took my silence the wrong way, for he started to take his arms off of me, apologizing.
"No." I grabbed his wrists and put them back around me. "Don't let go. I love you too, Josh. I'm sorry…you just caught me by surprise."
He tightened his arms around me and nuzzled his face into my hair. "Thank you."
I didn't know why he was thanking me, but I just tightened my hold on his arms and smiled to myself.
A few minutes later we went back into the house because I was freezing. Everyone was saying their good-byes.
"Bella, it was wonderful to meet you, dear. Will you be around tomorrow? We're having a welcome-home barbeque for Kaleb."
Of course. Only around here could you barbeque with it snowing. These people were nuts.
I answered in the affirmative, then Josh and I said our goodbyes and left.
We were parked out in front of my building a few minutes later.
"Do you want to have a drink?" I asked.
Now, this was normally how we ended our evenings together. He would drop me off at my building, come up for a drink, we would act like teenagers and suck face for a while, and then Josh would reluctantly go home. However, with our recent…uh…revelation…the question was laced with static. We both knew that it had taken us to a new level, and we both knew what his coming up to my apartment would mean.
Josh stared at me for a moment with consideration in his eyes, then leant forward and kissed me chastely. He didn't speak, but opened his door. He came around and opened my door for me and held my hand up the stairs. In the kitchen, I poured us both a glass of huckleberry wine and unwrapped some apple pie Karen had sent us home with. I set a plate down in front of him on the coffee table and sat next to him.
After a few minutes of silence between us (and trust me, it was a very awkward silence) Josh offered me a bit of pie from his fork. I took it and chewed with a smile on my face. I gave him a bite in return. It was strangely erotic, feeding each other.
I don't have any clue how it happened, but suddenly we were on the floor, kissing like our lives depended on it. Our tongues traced each other and our fingers stroked along skin that was abruptly exposed. I could feel Josh's erection against my thigh and I squirmed for more friction.
"Risking the chance of sounding completely cheesy, would you like to take this into the bedroom?" I asked.
"You sure?" Josh asked. He pulled away and stroked some wayward hair out of my face.
"Yes."
"All right." He lifted himself up off me and held his hand to me to help me up off the floor.
I took a deep breath and followed him. Here goes nothing.
I woke throughout the night to Josh's snoring. Sure, he'd stayed over before, but the once we'd fallen asleep on the couch together he'd been on his back. Other times he stayed on that couch and I was on my bed, after he had drank too much to consider going home.
Next to him, when he was on his stomach? Forget about sleep. I couldn't take it anymore and decided to get up officially around five-thirty. I took a long bath and found that, after last night, I felt like dressing kind of sexy. So I went back into my bedroom (there was no chance that Josh could hear me; he was snoring too loudly) and threw on an embarrassing lacy underwear set that Alice had picked out for me. I threw on a silky robe overtop. My feet were still freezing, though.
Screw looking totally sexy.
I put on my old fuzzy blue slippers and plodded into the living room to refine my lesson plan for the next quarter. After a couple of hours I checked in on Josh; he was just stirring so I gave it about fifteen minutes until he was awake.
Twenty minutes later he came out of the bathroom with a smile on his face.
"Hey, gorgeous." He came up behind me as I was cutting fruit and wrapped his arms around my waist, slipping under the front of my panties. I smacked his hand.
"Quit it."
He laughed. "Hmm…well, you've got it almost right."
"Hmm?"
"You're in the kitchen, but you're not barefoot."
"Pig." We both laughed. It was our thing. I cooked for him so much, and he always had the same comment. I always had the same retort.
"What'cha makin'?" he asked, pouring coffee into a mug.
"Scrambled eggs and fruit," I said. "The eggs are almost done."
"Sounds yummy." He reached up next to me and took some plates down from a cupboard. He set them on the table as I brought the food there. I grabbed some silverware and sat down across from Josh.
"Thank you. For last night," he said.
I blushed. "I should be thanking you." He placed his hand over mine and rubbed my knuckles.
"No regrets?"
"Why should I have any?" he smiled at me.
This was a start of something wonderful, I could feel it.
So why, after Josh left, did I lay in bed unable to sleep, aching for something more? Something I couldn't even place?
I was sitting in my classroom the next Thursday, during my free period, when Edward came up to my desk.
"What can I do for you, Edward?" I asked.
"Do you mind if I stay in here for a bit? They're doing blood typing in my biology class."
I chuckled. "I suppose it's all right."
"Do you remember when they did blood typing back in Forks all those years ago?" He asked with a smile in his voice.
I looked up at him. He had silently drug a chair across the room and sat backward in it. He rested his head on his crossed arms, which were resting on my desk.
"I do." I shook my head, smiling. "Looking back now, I'm surprised you didn't do me in there."
He frowned. "Don't laugh about your death, Bella. It was more tempting to me than you know."
I sobered up. "I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't mean to make light of it. I was thinking more of my reaction when you scooped me up from the pavement and insisted on carrying me to the infirmary. I was so angry."
He cracked a smile at that. "That was funny. Jasper was in a nearby classroom and gave me a taste of what you were feeling later. Even then I couldn't help but laugh." He proved it by laughing loudly.
I smacked his arm. "You're a jerk!" I laughed along with him.
When we calmed down he looked at me again. "Something's changed."
My heartbeat gave me away. It spiked violently. Edward smiled and looked at the left side of my chest. "I guess that tells me my suspicions." He ran his fingers through his hair agitatedly. "Do you love him?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Does he treat you well, Bella?"
"Yes."
"You're sure?"
"I'm sure."
"I'm still not giving up."
"I figured as much."
He looked me dead in the eye. Serious as can be, he said, "I am happy for you, though. I really am. This whole time we've been here I haven't seen your eyes light up but for these last few days. It reminds me of how you used to look at me. I am happy for you."
I was shocked. "Thank you, Edward."
He shrugged. "It's true."
We worked quietly for a few minutes.
"Edward?" I regretted speaking immediately after his name left my lips.
"Yes?"
"Nothing. Never mind. It's stupid."
He sighed in exasperation. "You know I hate when you do that. Just spit it out."
I chewed on my lip for a moment.
"Please?"
"Fine. When Alice and I went to Spokane, and I spilled coffee on my lap. Did she…um…well, did she think about me—when I was in the car? I mean, have you…uh…seen what she's seen?"
Should have just left it, idiot!
Edward wasn't looking at my eyes. Bad sign. He opened his mouth and closed it a few times, trying to come up with an easy way to break it to me.
"Never mind. I think I have my answer."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, she just…slipped."
"I understand, Edward. Can we just…not have anything more to say about it please?"
"Yes. My apologies." It was funny seeing him flustered. He became so proper; it really was endearing.
A bit later the bell rang, and Edward got up to drag his chair back to his table for class. He bent down in my ear first.
"I have to admit. I like the sight of you bare better than I'd ever imagined you with hair. And I've imagined it plenty, trust me." He quickly kissed me under my ear; his cool breath fanned my ear and then he was gone, sitting seemingly innocently at his table.
I tried to subtly press my legs together to try to stop the sparks of electricity that burst through my body at his kiss and his words. It did nothing to stop it, only spurring it on.
Stupid damn vampire!