For him in vain the envious seasons roll, who bears eternal summer in his soul.

- Oliver Wendall Holmes

There wasn't much more to say. If Elena Gilbert had never been more confused and regretful. Or maybe that was just what she told herself. She wouldn't lie and say that kissing Damon Salvatore wasn't one of the best things she'd ever experienced. She'd just leave out the part where he was an amazing kisser. Not that she'd tell anymore she kissed Damon in the first place. That would be bad. Very bad, and she didn't intend on telling anyone anytime soon, which meant she was stuck with this memory all by herself. Except of course Damon.

She didn't know what possessed her to do such a thing, she'd blame it on the pot and alcohol, but she knew that wasn't the truth. She didn't even want to think about what happened at the party anymore. Or after.

Elena didn't think she'd ever find herself in this exact predicament. As he hands knotted harder into Damon's sleek black hair, she wondered if Damon was just kissing her because he was bored of Caroline, or kissing her because he wanted her. But Elena couldn't find the courage or desire to pry her lips off his to ask him. So she continued with the long, passionate kisses she gave Damon, and he continued grabbing her butt. She didn't realize until Damon moved his lips from hers and down to her neck that she needed to breathe. As she inhaled and exhaled rapidly, Damon pressed open-mouthed sloppy kisses down her neck, sucking and nipping at her skin. There would surely be a hickey there in the morning.

He kissed his way to her collarbone, and down the middle of her chest. Elena could never remember liking this as much when she was with Matt or Stefan or even Tyler. With her back pressed against the brick wall of the back of the Lockwood estate, Elena gripped even harder onto Damon, this time the lapels of his leather jacket. A beeping came from his pocket and then one from the side of her bra.

"Ignore it." He whispered, and Elena realized it was their phones. His hands travelled just below the hem of her dress, slowly moving the fabric up farther and farther. Both of their phones beeped again. Damon rolled his eyes as Elena took hers out of her bra, taking the call.

"Hello?" Elena giggled as Damon's hand slinked further, and it seemed he had already replied to a text, and was now kissing her neck playfully. "Elena Gilbert is busy right now, please leave a message after the beep. BEEEEEEP!" Elena giggled again, and Damon thought it was rather cute.

"Elena, where the hell are you?" Bonnie asked, sounding pissed, but also slurring due to her drunken state.

"Bonnie, I'm busy can you call back later?" she asked as Damon started kissing her cheek, slowly inching towards her lips, making Elena quiver slightly.

"Oh my goodness, whatever. I'm cabbing home. Find your own way back." She spat, turning off the phone.

"Ooh, Bonnie's reaaaaaally mad at me." Damon only replied with a moan as his lips found his way back to hers. They sank down to the floor in front of the lake, her on top of him, straddling him and she bent her body down to kiss his neck and lips. Her hands skillfully unbuttoned his shirt and she pulled of both his shirt and leather jacket, kissing her way around his bare, solid chest. He laid his head back on the grass in total serenity, closing his eyes and her lips and hands made their way around his body. She fell off his body to lie beside him for a second, until her was now on top of her, doing the same to her as she did to him, going a little father this time, as to slinking his hand up her dress and pulling her panties aside…

Elena tried to shake the thought from her head. They hadn't had sex, but when they took a cab back to her place, they almost did. Until Jeremy almost walked in on them in a very compromising state. Luckily Jeremy knocked before intruding into her bedroom, and she had quickly pushed Damon off her bed and pulled the covers over her half naked body.

And now, she sat on the floor in the middle of her hallway, banging her head against the ground because she had just gone a tad farther than making out with her best friend's boyfriend. She called this out. She knew Damon would cheat on Care, but she wasn't expecting it to be her who he cheated with.

Elena didn't know how to respond to anything right now. She regretted what she did with Damon, but how could she regret something that felt so right? How were she and Damon supposed to act around each other now? How could she talk to Caroline and lie to her face when she makes up some dumb excuse about making out with Tyler all night? Elena didn't know how to go about this and she didn't want to, so all day she ignored calls from Bonnie and Caroline and Tyler and even one from Damon. She'd tell them that her phone was dead and she couldn't find her charger.

"Hey, 'Lena? I'm going to the grocery store, you wanna come with?" Jeremy asked, taking Elena out of her dream-like state. She looked up at Jeremy, her brown eyes inspecting her brother's.

"Uh, yeah. Sure." Elena pulled her hair up into a pony tail and threw on some leggings and a plain white, baggy v-neck and followed Jeremy out of the house to her car. It only took a few minutes to get to the store and Elena put on her sun glasses so that she could be free of the annoying sun. She basically followed Jeremy around, pushing the cart and watching as he loaded things into it.

"What's with you?" He asked. "You've been so quiet all day." Jeremy stated, looking to his sister with curiosity.

"I did something stupid, that's all." She muttered, picking up a package of cookie dough and throwing it in the cart. He looked at her strangely once more, then continued in walking beside her as they pushed the cart. A sharp turn made Elena swerve, hitting something softer than the shelf.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry." She said quickly.

"It's fine." He mumbled.

They both stopped immediately, brown eyes instantly hitting blue ones. They just sort of stared at each other for a second.

"Elena." Damon stated. Elena couldn't exactly talk because she didn't know what to say. When words finally escaped her mouth there was only one syllable.

"Hey." Jeremy looked between the two of them, then nodded, taking the cart from Elena and speeding away.

"We probably need to talk." Damon said, and it had been clear that it was awkward for him too and Damon Salvatore didn't do awkward. "Look, about what happened," He started and followed Elena as she began walking around the store.

"Nothing happened." She said, not looking back at him, but when he sped up and was soon standing in front of her, she looked up at him with her chocolate eyes. "Nothing happened." She repeated, and Damon smirked. She knew what he was going to do before her did it.

He gripped her arms hard and pulled her against him in a painfully hot kiss. When he drew back, she saw some of her red lipstick smudged on his lips. She laughed lightly, wiping it off of him. "Nothing happened."