A/N: Hi! Been a while since an update, sorry about that. I couldn't quite decide where I wanted this to go. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, especially Dengirl and Angelic Toaster for their lovely reviews for my last chapter. I think this will probably be the last chapter! I can't believe I finished it! Yay! *happy dance* So I really hope you like Chapter 9, and as always feedback is welcome.
They dropped Darya off in a small town in the south of Russia, which the Doctor promised remained relatively untouched by the debris of a crumbling country. The villagers were initially reluctant to take her, citing their bare barns and cramped houses, but after Rose emptied the TARDIS pantry into a wheelbarrow and presented it in front of the elders, they agreed to give her a home. Rose noticed several of the villagers admiring Darya appreciatively, and wondered if there was an ulterior motive to their kindness. Despite the Doctor's insistence that she was in safe hands, Rose refused to leave until Darya had woken. She wanted to tell her the news in person. It was time to start taking accountability for her actions. She sat on the floor in the dimly lit hut, watching the other woman sleep, and rehearsing her confession over and over in her mind. How do you tell someone you killed their child? Rose felt the prick of tears at her eyes again, and roughly scrubbed them away with the back of her hand. She was not the one who should be crying. Darya let out a low moan, and Rose stiffened, her eyes trained on her friend's pale face. She scooted closer to narrow bed and knelt beside it, taking one of Darya's thin hands in her own. She watched as Darya's eyelids fluttered, and as green eyes looked languidly around the room before coming to rest on Rose's.
"I'm not dead?" she asked in confusion. Rose attempted a smile and shook her head.
"Nah. We were lucky. I have this friend, called the Doctor, and, well, he found us and patched us up as best he could, and we're free now, your safe." Darya frowned, slowly digesting this information.
"Your friend must be a very good Doctor… he must care about you a lot to look for you all the way out there," she said softly. Rose's throat constricted. Maybe so, but she certainly didn't' deserve it. Her eyes widened as she processed the last part of the sentence, and she struggled up onto her elbows. Rose laid at placating hand on her shoulder.
"Hey, take it easy," she said gently. Darya looked at her in concern.
"As best he could? Are you alright? Are you still hurt?" Rose felt a lump in her throat. She tried to speak, but all she could manner was a strangled whimper. Darya squeezed her hand, and she looked down with tear-filled eyes.
"We're fine," she whispered. "But the baby.. it didn't make it. I'm sorry, I really am, I didn't mean.." she tailed off, watching Darya desperately. Darya looked down, then gave her a smile so sad it all but broke Rose's heart.
"It's okay. It's not your fault. It.. it would have happened anyway." Rose stared at her aghast.
"What? ? But if it wasn't for you stickin' up for me, he wouldn't have hurt you. You got hurt 'cause of me!" Darya shook her head.
"You stopped me getting hurt. You saw how they treated me there; do you really think I would have lasted more than a month? Maybe two?" She spoke matter-of-factly, as if talking about the weather. "Even if I did live long enough, I couldn't have raised my child there. If the cold didn't kill him the soldiers would. Besides, I'm free, thanks to you. I can try again. It's not your fault. It's not anyone's." She stared off into the distance, and her eyes filled with tears.
"I just wanted to be a mommy." Her voice caught in her throat, and she stared at her blanket. "I think I would like to be alone." Rose nodded, tears once again threatening to spill from her eyes.
"I think I have to go. My friend… it's not fair to keep him waiting." Darya nodded.
"Good Luck, traveller Rose." Rose kissed her lightly on the forehead.
"Good Luck, Darya. Be…" she paused. "Amazing." Then she slipped out the door. The last thing she saw before it closed was the slump in Darya's shoulders as she fell onto the mattress and started to sob.
"Alright Rose?" the Doctor asked as Rose stepped slowly into the TARDIS. Her red puffy eyes stood starkly against her white skin, and her eyes had lost their usual sparkle. She looked up at him and attempted a grin.
"Yeah, course." The Doctor pushed himself off the jump the seat and crossed the console room in three long strides. He rested one hand on her arm and brought the other one up to lift her chin until her eyes met his. In them he could see the clear blue guilt of his ninth regeneration, and the guilt and self-recrimination that had left him so broken before he met Rose.
"Oh Rose," he whispered softly. He wrapped his arms around her, squeezing her against his chest in a silent apology for shouting, for losing her, for the innocence she had lost somewhere in the Russian snow. He could feel her shaking, and her tears seeping into his shoulders. "I'm sorry," he muttered, over and over again. "I'm so sorry."
"They're all dead 'cause of me," she sobbed.
"Who?" he asked.
"All of 'em. The baby, those men in Utah, God, even the Daleks." He pulled away from her slightly, resting his hands on her shoulders.
"It wasn't your fault," he told her firmly, looking into her eyes to make sure she understood. "You did what you needed to do. You're not evil Rose Tyler. I take only the best, and I asked you, what, twice? Best decision I ever made." She gave him a watery smile.
"Yeah?" He grinned back at her.
"Yeah." His smile faltered slightly. "So, where to now?" Rose paused.
"Somewhere fantastic." The Doctor beamed.
"Brilliant!" He shot off around the console, pulling levers and twisting dials with dramatic flourishes. He didn't notice the smile slowly slip from Rose's face, or the guilt that trickled slowly but steadily into her eyes. Her Doctor, trying to make her happy. But she knew better. Whatever he said, it was still her fault.
He turned to her again suddenly, and she plastered a large smile on her face, remembering at the last moment to poke her tongue between her teeth. She promised him forever. She wouldn't break that. She would pretend to be the naïve little shop girl that he had found one night in a basement in London, instead of a dirty blond assistant. It made him happy, and she owed him at least that much.
A/N: Woo! That's it. I apologize deeply for the vats of cheese poured over some aspects of this chapter, but I'm no good at the whole emotional dealy. I know it wasn't a particularly happy ending but given the story and the period and whatnot I didn't think that would be particularly appropriate. I did have a sequel beginning to form in my mind if anyone's interested, though, where Rose's lack of faith in herself effects on of their adventures in a big way, so maybe I'll write that. But as always I would really love to know what you thought of this final chapter, and the story as a whole. If you're reading this, then you finished my story (or just skipped to the end) and I can't thank you enough for giving it your time, and I really hope you enjoyed it. Love minidaydreamer xx