A/N: The saying, "Long time coming" could be applied to this chapter for a number of reasons. I'll let you discover them on your own. This chapter is Golden Boy's longest to date and is meant as a peace offering for his long absence. He apologizes; as you will see in this chapter, he's been kinda busy.

Thanks and eternal gratitude to those who see these words before they are safe for human consumption. TwilightMundi, you ARE the Grammar Guru. Your patience with me and my shenanigans is the stuff legends are made of. Hugs, TM. To Barburella, you know the cycle: I write, I stop, you yell, I pout, you yell some more, I sulk, you threaten, I give in and write. If it weren't for you, GB would still be taped to that pole back in the prologue. We both thank you for your support and ass-kicking boots. Megsly and LauraLoo, there are no better pre-readers/skittlers in all the fandom. Thank you for your always entertaining and oftentimes unsettling comments in my Gdocs. And to she who requested to remain nameless: You are one classy Lady. I'd fly Coach with you anywhere, except for maybe Timbuktu. (I hear it smells there.) Thank you for your support and other "stuff." You know what I mean.

Disclaimer: SM owns the names, I own the sick things they do. By typing that last sentence I pretty much just admitted that I'm not fit for polite society. But when was polite ever fun? Eff polite! Enjoy.

8==D

Chapter Eight- Come Again...

I stood there in the driveway, staring down the street where Bella had long since disappeared around the corner. Bella. Just thinking about her made my pants tight again; my dick strained against the material at my crotch, trying to break free and chase after her. I was completely focused on replaying what took place a mere—how long had it been? I looked at my watch to check. Ten minutes? I'd been standing there staring blankly into the street for over ten minutes. I sighed deeply. A smooth voice behind me pulled me out of my Bella-induced haze.

"She's long gone, lover boy. The neighbors are gonna call the men in white coats if ya keep staring at nothin'.'"

"Damn it, Jazz!" I nearly jumped out of my skin. "Is it really fucking necessary to sneak up on a guy like that?" I raked my hand through my hair. It was a nervous habit my mother had tried to break me of throughout most of my life. I figured it was the least of all my evils, but if I had to choose between giving up whacking off or messing with my hair, then I'd never touch my hair again.

"I did not sneak up on you, Eddiekins. I stood at the door calling your name at least six times before I gave up and walked down here. What's so exciting at the end of our quiet street? And don't try to play dumb. I was watching the little floorshow you and Bella were putting on."

I was speechless. What was I supposed to say to that? Deny it? Argue that what Jazz had actually seen was my trying to realign Bella's back. From underneath her. With my tongue shoved down her throat. Somehow I didn't think that he'd believe me. So instead, I decided to man up and do the only thing I could do: beg him to keep his southern trap shut.

"Fuck, Jazz! You can't say anything! I didn't think anyone could see us! Please don't tell anyone. Especially anyone related to Bella whose name starts with 'em' and ends with 'met!' I'm too fucking young to die!"

"Chill, Edward! Sweet baby Jeebus, you need to get a hold of yourself, man! I wasn't planning on saying anything to Emmett. Yet. But you've got to be more careful if you want to keep that shit on the down low. I can promise you that Em's gonna find out you're bumping uglies with his baby sister if you continue to let her ride you like a seahorse in the driveway. What were you thinking?"

I waited for the Jazz to climb down off his high horse. I knew he meant well, but I was beginning to wonder if he'd sprouted a man-gina with all the nagging he was doing.

"You finished, Dear Abby? I was thinking how good Bella felt rubbing against my massive cock. That's what I was thinking." Maybe it was a tad crass, but I was developing a serious case of blue balls while contemplating my life without my balls. You know, after Emmett cut them off!

Uh, don't you have to have something in order to lose it? In your case that would be balls.

I mentally rolled my eyes at the wanna-be comedian in my head.

"Well, you might want to start thinking with something besides that massive cock if either of you ever wants it to survive long enough to do more than just rub up all over her. I'm just sayin'..."

"I know, Jazz. I'm just tense. God, I hope no one else saw us."

Fat chance, Golden-Boy Genius! I think NASA caught your little foray into amateur porn on the Hubble. That shit's gonna be all over the Internet before you can say "Viral Video!"

Nice. Thanks, Shat. I thought we were finally on the same team.

Not even close, bub. I'm Team Shatner; Team Edward is for pussy-whipped losers and teen-aged girls.

I blocked out the Shat and tried to focus on what Jasper was saying. It wasn't as easy as one might think.

"I don't think so; I just happened to have a good vantage point from my room. That girl has mad equestrian skills," Jazz said as he shook his head.

"Were you watching us, Jasper? That's just fucked up!"

"It's not like you were in the privacy of your room, Golden Boy. You had that shit out on centerfield. Next time move it to the end zone or at least to the sidelines. There are kids on this street!" He was obviously giving me a hard time about my... hard time.

"It won't happen again. Believe me. I happen to like the current arrangement of my junk. And I can pretty much guarantee that Em would perform gender reassignment surgery on me if he caught me humping his baby sister in the driveway."

"And he wouldn't bother with the anesthesia."

"The sick fuck," I agreed.

I assume Jasper had bestowed his allotted wisdom for the day, because he just turned and walked back into the house. I collected my supplies and did the same. I sprinted up the stairs to shower and rub one out to visions of Bella writhing and panting over me. I hoped with all of me that we'd be spending copious amounts of time in each other's presence in the very near future.

But before that could happen I had to come up with a viable reason for me and the delicious Mistress Swan to be spending time together. She had commanded it, after all. And I was nothing if not obedient. Okay, maybe that was a load of shit, but Bella barking out orders was hot, and if she told me to lick my own balls I would gladly do so. I could have gone with an elaborate story that involved Bella contracting a rare, life-threatening disease that required her to receive daily blood transfusions from a willing donor (me playing the part of the willing donor, of course), or I could keep it simple and concoct a scenario- perhaps a group project- that would require the two of us (and our private parts) to work closely together for the next few weeks. I decided that simple was probably the best plan. The fewer details for me to fuck up the better. Not to mention that the idea of my private parts spending quality time with Bella's private parts sounded a fuckton more appealing than having to be stuck repeatedly with needles just to spend time with the object of my desire. Even if it was just a hypothetical scenario.

It was under this guise that I casually mentioned to Emmett later that afternoon that I would be seeing Bella later. That conversation went better than I'd imagined. Then again, I'd imagined loss of life and limb, so even if my vision had been half accurate then it would have been a fucking improvement. I paused before knocking on his door to give myself a little pep talk.

Chill, Edward. If you go in there all shaking and sweaty he's gonna know something's up. He can smell fear like dogs and kids can.

And piss, Eddiekins. He can smell piss too, and if you don't chill the fuck out you're going to piss your pants and then he'll know something's up.

Thanks so much, Shat. Always so helpful, my inner voice deadpanned.

Anytime, GB.

Nervously, I knocked on the door to Emmett's room. It was immediately answered with a booming, "Fucking enter!" I quickly sniffed myself for the twentieth time since showering with Granny Swan's "Skunk De-funk," and was surprised that I didn't smell even the faintest hint of eau de skunk. I could have kissed that old lady on the mouth for her miracle wash-all, but I preferred sucking face with her granddaughter.

When I walked into Em's room I never would have expected to find him sitting cross-legged on the floor flipping through a Cosmo magazine. I guess it was better than walking in on him "polishing the silver," but it was disturbing all the same. He looked up from his perusal long enough to see who had breached the threshold of his inner sanctuary. "Oh, hey, Eddiekins. What can I do ya for?" I rolled my eyes and stepped farther into the room. I stayed close to the door, though, in case I needed a fast getaway.

"Hey, Em. Sorry to interrupt your, um, reading," I motioned toward the magazine in his lap, "but I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Sure, man, just let me mark my page." He dog-eared the article on "Sexy Ways to Use a Vibrator on Him."

"Yeah, I'd hate for you to lose your place," I snarked.

"Watch it, Cullen. This could be a very informative article that could come in handy someday." I fought down the urge to laugh.

"You do realize that's a magazine for women, right?"

"Don't be asinine; of course, I do. But if ya wanna please the ladies then you have to know what they want. Cosmo is the bible when it comes to the sex lives of women. Any man worth his weight in the sack should have a subscription to this magazine. It might even help you get a little play, Eddiekins."

"Um, thanks? I'll take your suggestion into consideration." I swallowed down the thick, hard lump that had formed in my throat, wondering if he'd be so apt to dispense the sex ed if he knew it was his sister's pants I wanted to "play" in.

I highly doubt it, Golden Boy. He'd be too busy tearing your dick from your pelvis and shoving it up your—

OKAY! Point made. Now fuck off, Shat! This is hard enough without your two cents.

Fucking... off.

"So, what did you want?"

"Huh," was my brilliant response.

"I don't have all day, man, and you knocked on my fucking door, so what did you want?"

I quickly recovered and braced myself for the rain of pain that was sure to pour down when I told him about Bella and me spending more "quality" time together. Thank God I had something to lead in with to soften the blow. I would owe Rosalie my first born, but at this point it was worth it.

"Well, uh, I was just thinking about our discussion the other day."

"Which one, Cullen. I don't consider it a highlight, but we do kinda talk daily these days. Lucky you."

"Heh, heh. Yeah, we do, don't we? Um, I was referring to when we were in the locker room. And you were uh, upset..." He continued leafing through his Bible of Blasphemy. "... about Rosalie." That got his attention. His head shot up and he glared at me. If looks could kill.

"Shut the fucking door." Not one to poke an angry bull with a red-hot poker, I did as I was instructed. "I thought I told you to never speak of it again. That was a moment of weakness! What goes down in the locker room stays in the locker room, fucker." My hands flew up in front of me in a pathetic attempt to protect myself if need be.

"Whoa, there, big guy! I haven't said a word about what took place amongst the lockers and jock straps. I was just trying to remind you of our conversation where you asked me to 'help' you."

"Why would you need to remind me of that? Do you think I'm senile or suffering from Alzheimer's Disease?"

"What? No! Of course not," I sputtered.

"Then, what the fuck, Cullen?" He stood up and was inches from my face.

"I think I know of a way to melt the heart of the Ice Queen."

"You mean like your brilliant plan to ignore her? 'Cause that's worked out so well for me and all." His biting, sarcastic tone told me that I had best talk fast or end up like road kill along I-75.

"Hey, now, that was working until you had to go and start gnawing on your foot like it was hot wings or some shit! But since you couldn't keep the sexual innuendoes to a minimum, the Plan backfired. Now we, uh, you, need to approach her from a different perspective."

"And what do you suggest?"

"'Operation Delicate Flower,' of course."

"What the fuck is that, numb nuts?"

"Rose is the 'delicate flower,' Em. Treat her as if she were a prized orchid or rare species of, well, rose. A girl likes to think she's special. Rosalie is no different."

"Aren't you the Don Juan all of a sudden."

"Nah, I've just been watching Rose and noticed how none of the guys really listen to her. They don't even really see her; they just stare at her and say really crass things when she's around. That's got to get old after a while. So, I figured if you were the one guy who was doing things differently then she'd notice and, in turn, notice you. That's all."

He stood there for a moment, not saying anything. I think he may have been stunned into silence. It was a moment I wanted to cherish.

"Wow, Eddiekins. That was deep—and crazy enough that it might just work. So you're saying I should be all gentlemanly and shit and treat her like a lady, and she'll be begging me to do her?"

"Something like that, man. But maybe you shouldn't focus on the 'doing her' part as a goal. Just concentrate on convincing Rose that she doesn't have to completely hate you."

We laughed at the thought of Rose having any strong emotion toward Em other than hate. A nagging voice reminded me why I'd initiated this conversation to begin with. I could feel the sweat as it formed beads on my forehead. I figured quick and painless was the best course of action. An image flashed through my mind of duct tape and the sickening sound of adhesive ripping away deeply-rooted hair rang in my ears. Quick wasn't always fucking painless. I fumbled with the rabbit's foot I had shoved deep in my pocket.

"Hey, man, I just wanted you to know that I was going to be picking up Bella this afternoon to work on a project for one of our classes." I searched his face for any indication that he may have seen the love fest that went down in our driveway earlier. The surprise and genuine interest told me otherwise.

"Really? That's right, I'd forgotten you two had a few classes together. Okay, say hi to my little sis for me."

That's it? No irrational rage? No, "Me Hulk! Me smash you for humping Hulk's sister in driveway?" I was shocked that it could be this simple.

Don't look a gift ape in the face! Get the hell out of here and go get the girl, dumbass!

But I couldn't leave well enough alone. "Sure thing, I just wanted you to know that we'd probably be spending quite a bit of time together and I didn't want you to get the wrong idea."

"While I appreciate the gesture for what it is, Cullen, I hardly think it's me that's in danger of getting the wrong idea here." I blinked stupidly at him as he continued. "Let's just make sure we understand each other. Bella is the gem in our familial crown, and while we're here at UF it's my job to make sure she's safe. You just make sure that while you're with my little cygnet that she's well taken care of. If you return her to sorority row with as much as a hair out of place then I'm going to snap you in half, filet you, and use your spine as a comb to smooth down her hair. Are we clear?"

I swallowed down the massive lump of bile that had managed to work its way up my esophagus and nodded my understanding, doing my best impression of a zombie. His massive meat hook of a hand clapped on my shoulder, nearly bringing me to my knees. "Excellent, Golden Boy. Now go get 'em, tiger!"

I wasn't sure if he was trying to be funny or if he was that stupid, but as I walked out of McCarty's room I could only think two things: one—I had Emmett's permission to spend as much time with Bella as I wanted. I felt the rabbit's foot in my pocket again and thought, "Well, this foot may not have been very fucking lucky for you Bugs, but it sure as hell came in handy for me!" And two—What the fuck is a cygnet? I made a mental note to look that up before I left to get Bella.

8==D

I pulled up to the Delta Gamma house and sat there for what felt like fucking forever. In all reality it was only probably a few minutes, but I just sat there thinking. Thinking about who was waiting for me inside, thinking about what my next move should be, and thinking how fucking good my car smelled. It was like that shit Bella brought over was magic. I was just glad that I wasn't going to have to scrap the damn thing.

Walking up to the front door of the house where the chick you want lives can be nerve-racking for some guys, but it never had been for me. What had I, Edward "Golden Boy" Cullen, have to worry about? Not to mention that I hadn't ever had to walk that road before; I'd just honk the horn and they'd come running out. But there I was, making the "Walk of Lame" as I'd always called it, and nervous as hell doing it. Not only was I hopefully walking toward the girl who had become the star of every fantasy I'd had since seeing her, but I was going to have to face the only thing remotely as scary as seeing her father or brother on the other side of the door: her sorority sisters. Just when I thought I'd be better off running back to the car and doing the usual honk-and-wait routine, the front door swung open and there stood Rose smirking at me.

"Well, well, what do we have here? Is the Delta Gamma house to be graced with the presence of a gentleman caller? And none other than the Golden Boy Cullen, at that!" She looked back over her shoulder and called into the house at no one in particular, "I hope you girls are all up to date with those Depo-Provera* shots. Edward Cullen is in tha hiz-ouse!"

"Very funny, Snoop Bitchy-Bitch," I quipped. "You gonna let me in or make me stand on the fucking porch all night?"

"I don't know, Cullen, are my girls safe with you on the premises?" she asked; her tone was light and amused but she blocked the door with her body.

"Please, Rose. You know there's only one girl in this house I'm even remotely interested in. I think your 'home for wayward girls' is safe from the likes of me." My patience was wearing thin. All I fucking wanted to do was see Bella, and there I was trapped in limbo, verbally sparring with Rosalie. I may have growled the last part at her in my frustration.

"Whoa, there, nice impression of the Big Bad Wolf, buddy. I'm on your side, remember? No need to huff and puff and blow your way in." She laughed and motioned for me to come in. "Welcome to the inner sanctum."

I tried to relax and stepped over the threshold into Neverland. The Dee-Gee house was well known throughout the campus as being a "dry house," and I didn't mean alcohol. For whatever reason, the girls—who were all known to be "active"—took an oath to keep the house a sex-free zone. If they wanted a little somethin' somethin' then they needed to look for somewhere else to engage in their extracurricular activities. Therefore, the Delts all referred to our sister sorority as Neverland, as in "never gonna land a lay under that roof."

"Have a seat in the parlor; she'll be right down," Momma Rose instructed.

"Parlor? What is this, Gone with the Wind?"

"We are in the south, but you're no Rhett Butler. Sit your ass on the chair. Want something to drink?"

"Nah, but thanks. So, if we have a few minutes, I have something to ask you about."

"Sure. What's on your mind, Ashley?"

"Shut the fuck up. I'm no pansy ass."

"Yet you're pansy enough to know who the fuck I'm talking about, douche. Now, what did you want to talk about?"

"Emmett. I want to talk about Emmett, and, just so you know, I happen to have had a fangirl back in Forks who liked to have Gone with the Wind playing in the background when we fucked. We fucked a lot."

"Ew. Too much information, pretty boy. What could you possibly have to talk to me about that concerns that waste of perfectly good man meat? I swear, if the guy would just get a damn personality transplant I might be remotely interested in him."

"Oh, really? Interesting..."

"What? What's interesting, Cullen? What are you scheming now?" I was amused that Rose seemed to be a touch flustered and tried to work that in my favor.

"Me? Innocent, little me? Never!"

"Pfft. You would never willingly use the words 'little' or 'innocent' when describing yourself. You're hiding something in addition to scheming. Spill it. Now."

"Fine. But I wasn't scheming. I just came from having an interesting conversation with that 'waste of man meat,' as you called him."

"You mean he can hold an intelligent conversation that doesn't revolve around the joys of sausage or how to build a town entirely from Legos?"

"Rose. Stop it. You know he's smart. Dense, maybe, but the guy's really smart." I found it odd and disturbing that I was here defending my arch nemesis to the woman of his dreams, but I soldiered on. I would do whatever it took to get Bella. "Well, smart enough to like you."

"Whatever," she scoffed. "So, the big ape has sexcellent taste in women that in no way reflects his SAT scores."

"But, see, it does. He could be out there, getting whomever he wanted. Instead, he's home right now, trying to give himself a personality transplant."

"What? You don't make any sense. You do know that's impossible—kinda like unicorns, leprechauns, or the national debt ever being paid in full. If I had to guess, I suspect he's home either perfecting his Madden skills or 'playing with Dick.'"

"You're probably right on both counts, but the guy can multitask. Have you never watched him out on the field?"

"Whatever. What makes you think he's undergoing some kind of metamorphosis?"

"He told me so."

"Oh, now, I'm convinced," she deadpanned. "He's a changed man! Alert the Alligator**! Emmett McCarty has now become a card-carrying, honorary chick. And why the fuck are you here talking him up like he's the best thing since spermicide?"

"Why are you so bitchy today, Rose? Chill the fuck out. Emmett isn't that bad, and he's trying."

"I find that hard to believe."

"Care to make a friendly wager on the matter?"

"You really want to make a bet that Emmett, otherwise known as 'charismatically challenged,' is capable of altering his already stilted personality radically enough for me, Rosalie Hale, to find him appealing?"

I guess she took my suggestion seriously, because two minutes later we were shaking hands after deciding that if McCarty proved that he was a changed man that I would win and she would have to do my laundry for the rest of the semester. If the Pillsbury Doughboy failed and botched his personality transplant then I would have to be Rose's manservant for the span of one week—answering her every beck and call while wearing a cheerleader's uniform. There was no way in hell I was going to lose that bet. My poor, wounded ego couldn't afford to.

Just as we were agreeing on the final terms of the "agreement" Bella came down the stairs looking hotter than should be legally allowed. There wasn't going to be any studying going down tonight, pretend or otherwise. The only thing I wanted to study at that moment were the curves under her tight sweater! The only thing tighter than her top were the jeans she must have painted on. Oh, and my fucking pants! They were fairly snug, too. My fingers itched to skim over the soft fabric that stretched across her chest and feel the peaks of her nipples. Had I mentioned that the top was tight? Because I could totally see the hard outline of her perky tits. For a moment I flashed back to this morning and what it had felt like to have the weight of those tits cupped in my hands.

I like 'em big! I like 'em chunky!

You've got to be kidding me, Shat!

What? Ain't nottin' wrong with lovin' chunky...

I figured, "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em."

I like 'em funny

I like 'em spunky

I like 'em witty

I like 'em smart... with brains

Girl I Like your big...

What you say?

I had obviously lost what precious little hold on sanity I had, because I was singing "I Like 'Em Big" with The Shat, and enjoying every second of it. I'm fairly sure I was humming the tune out loud as I watched her boobs gently bounce with every step. Again, I remind you that said sweater was tight, and thin. Did I mention thin?

For what felt like the umpteenth time, I was brought out of my trance by a throat clearing. I wondered if the whole fucking campus was coming down with a cold or some shit. It seemed like everyone I saw that day was clearing their throats at me!

Somehow, Bella's tits had moved across the room without my realizing it and were now inches from me and just within my grasp. I must have been caught up in the roll of their tide and hadn't noticed their forward trajectory. Bella stood in front of me and said her hello. I blame the proximity of her chest to my person (and The Shat) for what I said next.

"I like 'em big. I like 'em plumpy." I expected to get a knee to the balls for that one, or at the very least, a stinging slap, but my girl just giggled and said, "I know you do, Moto Moto. I think I just found my new nickname for you. Come on, let's get out of here."

8==D

By the time we got away from the Dee-Gee house the sun was starting to set; it was that time of evening where it wasn't daylight anymore but not quite night time either. What's the word I'm looking for? Oh yeah, dusk. We decided to grab something to eat at the diner down the street; a debate broke out over if we should go see a movie, and, if so, which one. Eventually, she won, saying that we couldn't talk in a dark theater, even though my counter argument was clearly superior: while a movie wasn't conducive to conversation it was, in fact, the perfect place for me to make-out with her and feel her up. I opted instead to take her over to Lake Alice and walk along the paths there. There were plenty of opportunities to duck off into the woods and fool around.

We drove to the lake after eating. Dinner was nice. It was amazing being alone with Bella. Well, as alone as two people can be in a restaurant full of other people stuffing their faces and pretending to be interested in what the person across from them was saying. The conversation between us was laid back and light. Bella mentioned my lack of skunk stank, and my dick did the Conga when she said she much preferred my freshly-showered scent. I wanted to drag her back to my shower at the Delt House and lather her with my Axe body wash. Little Captain must have agreed; he was about to break his neck to get closer to her.

I found a place to park and I took her hand in mine as we headed down the closest path. There was a sliver of moon lighting the path and reflecting off the dark waves of Bella's hair. She looked so tempting. I decided to make my move. We walked along a little farther; without warning, I tugged on her hand. "Follow me," I instructed her. Her grip on my hand tightened as I steered us off the well-worn path and onto the leaves and branches that covered the ground. Once we were a few yards away from potentially prying eyes I backed her up against the closest tree. "I've been dying to do this all night, Bella." I licked my lips in anticipation before bringing my mouth down over hers. The whimper that escaped from her could have knocked me down if I hadn't been holding onto her hips like a life preserver. A soft, cushy, warm life preserver. Water safety was never so fucking hot.

I had intended to kiss her slowly, purposefully. Our kiss from earlier, when she rode me like a professional jockey in my driveway, had been desperate and rushed. This kiss was supposed to be my chance to show her that, for me, this was more than stolen moments of sneaking away for a grope or a hook up. I wanted more from Bella, and I hoped she wanted more from me, too.

When did I become such a fucking girl?

That's what I've been trying to tell you, pussy! Now STFU and get in there, SeaBiscuit!

Spurred on by the "encouraging" words of The Shat, I dove deeper into our kiss, licking and teasing her mouth, encouraging her to open to me. She didn't make me wait long; soon, she was as invested in our embrace as I was, moaning and panting as we did our best to rub every square inch of bark off the tree we were propped against. Bella's glorious tits would brush against my chest every time she moved or took a breath. It was a sensory overload. The feel of her lips against mine, the rough bark under the hand I used to prop myself against the tree to avoid crushing her, the soft pile of her sweater at her hip that I had fisted into a wrinkled mess, the tickle of her hair when the slight breeze teased it across my skin, the feel of her nails etching passionate pleas across my back. My mind worked furiously thinking a million things at once.

God, she feels good! How far can I take this? I wonder if she'd be okay if I felt her up just a little? Or took this fucking sweater off altogether? Fuck, I wanna take all her clothes off and have her naked and under me! I wonder what the chances are of that happening tonight?

Slim to none, Mr. Anxious Pants.

Shat, I'm only gonna tell you this once: this is a party for two; get the fuck lost.

Fine. But don't blame me if your night ends in blue balls instead of happy endings. I was just trying to help you get laid.

Duly noted, now scram!

Bella moaned and I, of course, took that to be the universal invitation for "Touch my tits, please!" So I did. And they felt better than I remembered. If I could have found a way to walk around the rest of life with my hands on Bella's boobs, I would have done so. So soft, and heavy. And when my thumb brushed across her nipple? Oh, God, I wanted it in my mouth! I gently pinched the tender, erect flesh and she whimpered her gratitude. Her hands had been steadily migrating toward my ass; she roughly grabbed hold and pulled my hips flush with hers, grinding against my cock. The signals she was sending couldn't have been much clearer, unless she stripped us both of all our clothes, threw me to the ground, and straddled me. I didn't think that was something she'd have a problem doing, considering our make-out session from earlier.

She was driving me crazy! I felt as if I was going to explode if I didn't touch her skin soon. Slowly, I drew my hand down her body, my fingers slipping under the hem of her sweater. The skin of her stomach was smooth and cushy under my explorations. My hand continued its upward path with tentative sweeps, I gasped when I met the lace of her bra. "What color is this sexy bra, Bella? I need to know."

"Orange," she panted against my mouth. "My panties are blue, just in case you were wondering about those, too."

Gotta love a girl with school spirit!

"Go Gators!" I growled and then went back to ravishing her mouth. My greedy phalanges hooked over the edge of the cup and released her from its confines. The air in my lungs evacuated my chest in a rush of wind when I felt the creamy, smooth skin of her boob at last.

So smooth! So fucking good!

"Ugh, Edward! God, yes! Your hand feels so good. More."

Not one to disappoint a lady, I bunched her sweater up around her neck, and my mouth turned its attention to the heaven that awaited it in her perfect tits. I lapped and sucked at her like she was an ice cream cone quickly melting in the summer sun. Lefty was surely jealous of Righty, so I paid her some attention as well. Bella ground herself against my thigh, trying to find friction to relieve the ache that was building in both of us. Her moans filled the cool air around us. I was so caught up in the nirvana that was her rack that I was caught completely off guard when she decided to get a little handsy, as well. At one point her hands were kneading my ass, the next they were groping my dick through my jeans. My hips bucked against her, desperate for more.

Looks like my hands aren't the only part of me that's greedy.

Bella obliged, rubbing and tugging at me. "Damn these jeans! I can't get a grip on you!" Faster than I could say "let me help you with that" she had them unbuttoned, the zipper down, and was whipping my cock out of my boxer briefs. I hissed when her hot, little hand made contact and pumped me confidently. "Bella. Mmmm, just like that, baby. So good..." I hummed in appreciation. This girl knew what she was doing, and I was so very glad she was doing it to me at that moment.

I wanted her to feel as good as she was making me feel. I was no longer content with just feeling her up, so I moved the pleasure party I was bringing below her waist, as well. While she continued working her magic on my disco stick, I quickly popped the button on her jeans and slid the zipper down. Glancing down I saw that her panties were indeed blue—and lace. I slipped under the waistband and over the soft curls there. The feel of her slick and needy against my hand was intense. She moaned, "Fuck, Edward!" Her jeans were too tight for me to get in there and really work; believe me, I fucking tried! I hated to abandon ship after setting the U.S.S. Horny afloat, so I settled for rubbing and grinding my fingers along the seam of her jeans until she was writhing and chanting my name as she came.

No longer distracted by my efforts to get her off, she went to work on me with renewed purpose. Suddenly, she gently pushed me back and dropped to her knees. Her mouth closed over the tip of my cock and I groaned in ecstasy. It had been so long since I'd had a chick's lips around my dick, but never had it felt that amazing. After only a handful of passes of her very-talented mouth up and down my love torpedo I blew my load before I could warn her to back away. She didn't seemed fazed, though, taking it all like it was whipped cream rather than cum. She was fucking amazing, and I told her so. I helped her up and pulled her to me.

"Wow, Bella. That was... beyond words. Thank you." I had never thanked a girl for getting me off before. I just figured it was as much a pleasure for them as it was for me. With Bella, though, I couldn't stifle the gratitude that welled up inside me. I was in my blissful happy place when I heard a throat clear behind me and felt Bella tense up in my arms. I looked over my shoulder to see a man in a uniform pointing a flashlight in our direction.

"What the fuck? Think you could stop shining that shit in our eyes," I called as I heard Bella zipping up her jeans and assumed she was straightening her clothes.

"Mind telling me what you kids are doing out here in the woods... at night," the man asked smugly.

"Just going for a stroll. Is there a problem with that?" I was being a little difficult, but this asshat had interrupted my post-coital bliss, and I was not at all happy about that. He pointed the beam of light down to cast its light along the ground.

"Well, no, except that you're supposed to stick to the paths, as per the rules clearly stated on the signs. Not to mention you two were making enough noise to warrant a few calls to the Ranger's station. Someone reported they heard animals mauling a hiker. I just came out to make sure no one was hurt. From the looks of it, though, I'd say you two were definitely mauled, but not hurt." The mood killer grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at us. It was then that I noticed a cool breeze on my half-mast dick. Officer Friendly noticed it the same time I did and hummed his admiration. He was eyeing me like I was a juicy cheeseburger and we were in a drive-through rather than the woods. "Nice," was his commentary on my junk. I quickly tucked my then fully-deflated dick back into my jeans and closed up shop. I did not want him to think I was a twenty-four hour window or some shit.

"We'll just be going now," I informed him. Grabbing Bella's hand I tugged at her until she followed.

"Sorry," she called behind us. "We didn't see the signs."

"Just be sure to stay on the path from now on!" he shouted back. I didn't hear the last part clearly, but it sounded like he laughed and said, "Come again."

8==D

*Depo-Provera is a form of birth control administered via shots every three months.

**The Alligator is the Campus Newspaper for UF and where Bella works.

A/N: There really is a very large lake on the UF campus named Lake Alice. It's beautiful and everyone flocks to its shores. Google it.

This story was rec'ed by a fantastic writer who sent a shit ton of traffic to this ridiculous story. I don't have nearly the readers she does, but I'd like to return the favor. So if you haven't read the awesomesauce that is CoachLady1's "Guarding Bella Swan" then you need to hop over and give it a read. wwwDOTfanfictionDOTnet/s/6064435/1/Guarding_Bella_Swan

There aren't very many chapters left of this fic. I'm estimating three or four at the most, so we are in the home stretch! Thank you all for the wonderful comments and hilariously funny theories you leave me in reviews. I don't deserve you people. *Snuggles and smooches* Until next time, Lambies...