Chapter Two

Detective Beckett was distracted as she rode the elevator back up. She had a hard time keeping the grin off her face. She had rushed through her visit with Lanie, earning her a raised eyebrow from the medical examiner who was, fortunately, too busy with a body to pursue a line of questioning that Kate didn't want to get into right now. Not that she ever wanted an interrogation from her friend who was entirely too perceptive sometimes.

She was looking forward to lunch with Castle and getting a more detailed peek inside his head. It was an odd turn of events, since he was usually the one digging around in her brain. It didn't hurt that she was already a huge fan of his work. It didn't hurt that she often wondered about how he wove his stories or how he developed his plots.

She would never admit to him exactly how much she enjoyed reading his books, so that would have made it difficult to broach the subject herself. She was glad, on a day like today had been, that he had provided this distraction for her. She had been hoping that something would distract her from her own thoughts and a mind numbing day of paperwork was not going to do the trick.

Even if only for an hour over lunch, she was looking forward to immersing herself in someone else's life. It was made even more exciting by the fact of whose mind she'd be immersed in. Richard Castle, whose novels she had loved for years. They were friends; she would admit that now, though it had taken a couple of years for her to take him seriously.

Friends or not, he never talked about his work more than surface details and she was intrigued to see the process she had always been curious about but never had the nerve to ask.

She was still lost in thought as the elevator opened and she stepped out, trying to relax her features so she wouldn't give away her excitement when she got back to her desk. She was bumped hard as she stepped off and heard the quiet and insincere apology of the man who had bumped into her.

It took a moment for her to register that the quiet apology was in a very familiar voice. It almost sounded like Castle, but there was something off about his tone. It was strained and tight, off just enough that she was certain it wasn't actually him. When she turned to acknowledge the apology she was shocked to see Castle standing in the elevator, jabbing the button.

"Castle?" she asked in surprise before she truly processed the man in front of her.

His shoulders were slumped, his posture portraying a sort of sadness that at first she thought her initial interpretation had to be wrong. Then her eyes locked with his and she took in his expression. His mouth was a tight line as if he was fighting intense emotion, lips pursed so tightly a muscle in his cheek was twitching softly.

Castle looked pale as if all the blood had left his face. She was about to ask him if he was feeling sick, because he sure looked like he was about to throw up or pass out, but then her eyes locked on his and it was clear this wasn't a physical ailment. The sheen in his eyes, sparkling in the light with unshed tears, made her suddenly aware that the tension in his features was his attempt to fight an emotional turmoil, not a physical illness.

Her heart stuttered at the sudden realization that something was horribly wrong. She wanted to stop him, ask him what the matter was, hop in the elevator and figure out something to say on the way down, but she was shocked in place. She hadn't seen this level of emotional distress on the normally jovial writer more than a few times, each of which was under a highly stressful situation.

The crinkle between his eyebrows, the set of his jaw, glistening eyes, the tense set of his shoulders, her stomach bunched with concern for whatever was going on. He looked completely crushed and her first thought was, 'Oh, God, not Alexis'.

As the doors slid closed, her eyes drifted down and her last sight was of his hands, balled into tight fists that weren't quite able to mask the subtle shaking in them.

Her mind instantly went into detective mode as she pulled out her phone and dialed his number. Something was seriously wrong and he might need her help. If not as a detective, perhaps as his friend.

The line rang five times and went to voicemail.

She instantly hung up and dialed again. Five more rings and no answer. By the time she made a third attempt she was back at her desk, thinking that perhaps the elevator was blocking his signal.

On her third attempt she left him a brief, but insistent, message, "Castle, call me."

As she hung up she thought there was so much more that she could have said, should have said. She should have offered her help or let him know that she would be there for him if he needed her. He had been there through so much for her and the least she could do was be there as he went through whatever the hell was going on.

Completely distracted as she waited for his return call she zoned out on his chair for a moment, letting her mind wander. She wondered if she should call his mom or daughter, but what if it was nothing. What if she was overreacting? Maybe she hadn't seen what she thought she saw. Maybe he was just in a hurry to get home, perhaps inspiration had struck and he had to head off and write immediately.

Even as the thoughts filtered through, she dismissed them. She knew Castle too well for her to have misinterpreted that expression. She wanted to give him a little while to call her back before she started to rile up anyone else.

Pushing aside her paperwork she opened a program on her computer and pulled up the logs on recent calls for emergency personnel. She was still cross referencing fire, paramedic, and police calls when Ryan and Esposito came back. Esposito was teasing Ryan about how many times he called his fiancé between interviews and they stopped beside her desk.

"Yo, Beckett." Esposito greeted her with a crooked grin, "Settle a debate for us, would you?" he asked, but didn't wait for an acknowledgement, "How often is too often to call your significant other while you're supposed to be working?"

"I think Ryan spends less time calling Jenny than you spend texting Lanie, so if one of you has a problem I'd say that it's you." She responded absently, still scouring the files and coming up empty on Castle's home address, Alexis' school, even reports by general description of his mother or daughter.

They were both still standing there, now considering her with odd expressions. She must have let on that something was bothering her. Perhaps he had contacted one of the boys, though that was entirely unlikely.

Turning away from her computer with no new information she regarded them, "Have either of you heard from Castle today?" she asked.

Kate watched the two detectives share a knowing smile, the little smirks just succeeded in pissing her off. Didn't they know this could be serious?

Ryan was the first to speak, a teasing grin on his face, "He's not coming in today." He explained and followed it with a suggestively low toned, "Why?"

Esposito picked up from there, "Missing him already?"

"Guys." She snapped. Her tone indicated that she wasn't in a joking mood and they became completely serious. Both shook their heads to acknowledge that they hadn't heard from the writer. "He was just here, but he left in a hurry, something's wrong and now he's not answering his phone."

Esposito pulled out his cell, hitting the speed dial for Castle and waiting. She watched with anticipation, hoping that perhaps Castle would answer for the other detective. Somewhere in her she knew that she would be more than a little upset if he answered for Esposito and not her.

A moment later when Javier hung up his phone, Ryan already had his out dialing. With the same result they shared a puzzled look.

"He always answers his phone." Ryan said, a hint of confusion in his voice

Esposito turned suddenly concerned eyes on her, "You try." He told her. "He definitely wouldn't ignore your call."

She shook her head, "I already did."

"Again." Ryan encouraged.

With a sigh, she picked her phone up off her desk, hit 'redial' and waited. Each ring brought her pulse up a notch, anxiety and concern building with the tension. His familiar voice mail message played in her ear and she hung up.

The boys got as much from her as they could, though she was hesitant to explain the full extent of his expression. She explained it as agitated and anxious and left out the part about his watery eyes and how he looked like he was fighting just to hold himself together. With the vague thought that she might be overreacting to something, she wasn't about to hand the boys ammo to use against Castle when he strolled in as if nothing had happened later today or tomorrow.

It was another half hour of them unofficially investigating their friend, changing the search criteria to encompass the entire day instead of just the past couple of hours in case Castle hadn't been contacted right away. When they came up empty, Beckett had finally had enough.

Slipping away from her desk she moved to the break room to make a cup of coffee, but her true intent was subconscious. Once she had everything started, she pulled out her phone and scrolled her contact list. Without a single thought about it, she hit call.

It took only one ring for the phone to be answered. "Detective Beckett?"

She felt both relieved and guilty at the sharp note of concern in Alexis Castle's voice. On one hand she was glad that the teenager was alright, but on the other hand she now had the girl worried about her father. "Hi Alexis." She tried to keep her tone casual.

"Is Dad, ok?" she asked, the one question Beckett wasn't sure she could answer just then, especially when presented with a note of anxiety.

"Actually, he just left a little bit ago." She told the teen, not sure if she affected the proper level of calm in her voice.

"Oh." Alexis sounded confused, "Is there something you needed from me?" she asked.

Beckett felt a little silly now for having called the girl. She had just been so concerned that something had happened to her from the way Castle had left. There was no one he cared about more than his daughter and seeing that expression on his face had instantly sent her mind reeling with concern for the teen.

She decided to just give it to her straight; unlike Castle, Alexis was actually very level headed. Beckett explained that her dad had looked upset as he left suddenly, but wasn't answering his phone. "I was just worried that something might have happened to you and I wanted to call and make sure everything was ok." She finished.

Alexis chuckled lightly, "Not that I don't appreciate the concern, but he would have told you if something happened to me. I'm pretty sure of it." She was going to ask a follow up question, but Alexis continued, "I'm sure it's nothing. He probably just had an epiphany or something. Sometimes he gets a very serious look on his face when he's struck with inspiration."

"You're probably right." Beckett responded, not entirely convinced.

"He sent me a text message about twenty minutes ago." Alexis told her.

"That's good. Sorry to have worried you." Beckett responded as she felt a moment of relief at the teen's words. That meant he was in active communication as of very recently. "When you see him later, can you just ask him to call me?" she inquired

"Actually, I'm going with Paige and her family to their winter home. Skiing and hot cocoa until Sunday, but I can give him a call and let him know. If you want."

On one hand, Beckett was a little frustrated that Castle wouldn't answer her calls, but he sent Alexis a text. At the same time, she was his daughter and Beckett was just, well, that was complicated. She knew Castle wouldn't ignore his daughter's calls as he was obviously ignoring theirs and perhaps she could get a sense of relief. As much as she felt odd asking the girl to do it, Beckett agreed that she would appreciate the gesture.

Back at her desk a while later, after finishing her conversation with Alexis, she felt better. She told the boys Castle was in touch with his daughter and everything seemed to be fine. He was probably writing.

With that they all turned back to their paperwork.

It was almost four in the afternoon when a shadow passed over her desk and she looked up, fully expecting to see Castle hovering near his chair. It was Alexis and the young girl's forehead was creased with concern. "He's not answering." She said simply.

"You said he gets held up in his writing and sometimes doesn't hear what's going on around him." She tried to calm the girl with the logic she had used on the detective earlier.

"No, you don't understand." The teen's frustration was palpable. "His phone is off." She said tightly, her tone rising as she spoke, "He never turns off his phone."

It took Beckett a moment to formulate a response to the passion in the teen's voice and the concern written on her face. "Maybe the battery died." She provided as lightly as she could manage, though the extent of Castle's emotional state was still a secret she was keeping to herself.

"He took it off the charger this morning before I left for school. His charge will last four days unless he spends all day playing with his apps, then only one or two, but he couldn't kill his battery this quickly even watching movies."

Beckett sighed and led Alexis into the break room, guiding her to a chair and sitting across the small table from her. "I'm sure he's fine. What did he say in his text message?"

Alexis dug in her pocket and pulled out her phone, scrolling through before sliding it across the table to Beckett.

She felt a moment of numbness as she read the brief message.

"Have fun skiing. Don't worry about me being stuck in the big Apple. Love you!"

It shouldn't have meant anything. It sounded perfectly rational and reasonable for a message from a father to a daughter, but something struck her.

As her mind flashed through him explaining his 'safe word' to her so long ago and the dozens of times she had twisted his ear and he'd shouted, "Apples, Apples!"

The phrase 'stuck in the big Apple' sent a chill through her.

Something had happened to him and he was sending them a message. She wondered what he had walked into when he left the precinct and hoped that they would find him before something terrible happened.

She couldn't stop the myriad of visions that plagued her as she forced herself to remain outwardly calm while her internal torment raged with flashes of hundreds of crimes scenes she had been through.

Each one had a disturbing change from her original experience.

Instead of the victim they had found on scene, her mind replaced them with Castle. Frozen in construction scaffolding, hanging upside down from a fire escape, stuffed in a safe, laid out on the floor in a puddle of his own blood, a large crimson stain growing from a wound in his chest and soaking into the carpet.

In each mental image, his body was pale and lifeless, but his eyes held the expression he had the last time she had seen him in the elevator. The hurt and anxiety clearly reflecting in his blue eyes as if begging her to help him.

She felt suddenly breathless from her own imagination and hoped she was completely wrong about this whole situation.

x.x.x

A/N: I'm so very humbled by everyone's response to this so far. I am focusing on my other story, but will try to post on this every 2-3 days, probably alternate POV like I do in most of my stories.

To answer a question, no, this is not based on spoilers for the future. The spoiler warning from the previous chapter is for episodes that have already aired. If you haven't seen them, they may or may not be referenced briefly.

Review that made my day: pkl, First to the party just like my last story and so excited you make me smile every time.

Thanks for reading.