My name is Uncle Ruckus, and this is My Voice
If I had a voice, I would tell you
that honestly, I wish I was dead right now.
I'm tired of living in this cruel world, the world that promised me nothing.
There are people out there who would tell me to suck it up and get over it.
But you weren't there to see how I suffered,
how I managed through all the shit life's given me.
If it weren't for some damn skin disease, I'd be a normal white man,
and I wouldn't be up here in Woodcrest.
But no, I became one of the poor black men.
I do all sorts of various jobs to get money,
I work 6 jobs 5 days a week just to get by.
I'm quite surprised to be living right now, what with the money I make anyways.
I sometimes cry myself to sleep at nights,
hoping,
praying,
even begging God to take me away in my sleep so I join him on the other side.
But I wake up each morning to find that still here on this side,
having to go through the same routine each day,
and it makes me cry even more.
It pisses me off how there are these nice little white children having a better life than me,
but I still respect the white man,
because technically, I am white, even though I'm "black".
Now there are some people out there who ask me why chose death when I could chose life,
But honestly, if you take a walk in my shoes, and see all the shit that I've gone through,
from an abusive childhood,
to this damned, terrible adulthood,
you'll see why I want to leave and join God and Jesus and everybody else up there.
I've got no one over here.
My family left me because of my abusive father.
There's Tom, Robert, and those reckless Freeman Boys, but I can't trust them enough to have my back.
Now most of them out there know why I'd rather be dead.
Because in the end, I'd rather be on the other side, sad, crying, and surrounded by people
than be over here, sad, crying, and all by myself.