I do NOT own The Big Valley nor any of the original Big Valley characters.

End of the Rainbow

Chapter Ten

Patrick stood next to the horse Cat called Blackie and stroked his mane. He was a fine horse, and Patrick was startled to find himself thinking, 'I'd like to have been the one to break you in'. Had he indeed, at one time, broken in a horse? He looked down at his spurs, and then took off his hat. He did dress more like a cowboy than a farm hand. His head began hurting again; it hurt so bad he fell to his knees and grabbed his head.

Cat, not knowing the cause of the headache, ran as fast as she could, not easy since she had a tendency to get sometimes get dizzy when she ran, and knelt down beside Patrick. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and held him close. "Do I be needin' to send for a doctor, or somewhat?"

"No," Patrick answered as the pain subsided as he pulled away, "thanks for your concern anyway. I just need to stop trying to remember things. It does no good."

Cat felt her heart go out to the man as the two of them stood back up. Maybe the trip wasn't such a good idea after all; maybe she should get a hold of Henry again and see if he was still available to accompany her. Patrick could see the worry in her eyes and guessed at what she might be thinking. "Don't worry," he said as he went back to brushing Blackie, "I'm fine; I can make the trip." He had no intention of breaking either one of the promises he'd made.

"If you be sure," and then, her heart going out to him with his amnesia situation, added, "I 'ate feelin' so useless, when it comes to your loss of memory. If I 'ad a clue to as who you be, I'd be tellin' you. I 'ope you know that." Her eyes were full of concern and her voice sincere.

Patrick knew that; he also knew that, despite his fight against it, he was falling in love with her. Thinking again of her reference to the end of the rainbow, he turned and took a hold of her shoulders. "What do you, yourself, want? Besides the horses being taken to their new home?"

Cat felt shock waves go through her as she looked into his eyes full of a genuine desire to fill her last request, as it were. Maybe she couldn't have everything she'd ever wanted, but, did she dare? "I…I told you not to be worryin' 'bout that." She started to turn away only to find him gently making her to look at him. He wanted to know.

"Tell me." His eyes bored into hers with such forceful persuasion that she gave in.

Her eyes were full of sincerity as she asked hesitantly, "Kiss me? In all me twenty-three years of livin', I've never been kissed, and I've never met anyone like you." Maybe that's why she found the courage to ask what was on her mind. He was different from anyone she'd ever met.

Never? Patrick stared. How on earth had such a beautiful, kind gal such as her been that unfortunate? He smiled, drew her to him and lowered his head. He didn't rush it, not wanting her to regret the request. The sweet taste of his lips sent shivers down her spine and Cat found herself sliding her arms up his back and holding onto his shoulders.

Patrick decided right then and there to at least court her. Due to her health and the fact she was dying, maybe marriage was out of the question, maybe it wasn't. It didn't really matter; he could still make sure she knew he cared. Though the first way to do that was to make sure he didn't use her in any wrongful way. He made himself pull back. "The men around you have been blind." He continued holding onto her as he smiled at her. "I best thank them." He paused, grinned wide and said, "Someday. I don't want to wake anyone up right now."

Cat blushed at the compliment. "I 'ope I wasn't out of line in askin' that, truth be told while others be dreamin' of findin' a pot of gold, I only dreamt of findin' a tall handsome cowboy who 'onestly, I mean, 'onestly cared 'bout me." Tears started to fill her eyes. "I'd accepted it would never 'appen though."

Patrick felt his heart strings being pulled tight as held her close and stroked the back of her head. "It's happened, girl. It's happened and I'll stay with you until the end, I promise. I'll help you get these horses to Stockton, and then we can go whatever you want." He knew, from his talks with her doctor, that he was only giving her up to eighteen months of his life, but she deserved some happiness during her last days. He was bound and determined to see she got it.

Cat thought on her home in London. Oh, it wasn't not that she wanted to go that far, but she missed 'her docks', sitting on the pier, watching the boats roll in and tossing small pebbles into the water just to see the ripples appear. "Stockton's bein' a small river port, isn't it? It be havin' docks, ships and a river?" She pulled slightly backwards and tilted her head upwards. She wanted to see into his eyes.

He smiled down upon her. "From what folks say around here it is, I can't rightly say if I know that or not. If it does, I'll find work, and you can have your docks and other things back." The moment he said the words, he felt himself fall over 'that line'; inwardly he cursed the doctors and held her close.

He released Cat and, after thinking for a moment, said, "Why don't we get ready to start our journey in a couple of hours? There's nothing to keep us around here anymore, and the sooner we leave, the sooner we can get these horses to Stockton." What he didn't voice was the thought that the sooner the horses were taken care of, the more time he'd have to make sure her last days were happy ones.

"Okay." She wiped her eyes and smiled, excited at the prospects of getting the journey started. ''eaven forgive me if you be married,' she thought as they walked, arm in arm, towards the house.

While Patrick and Cat prepared to head to Stockton, Jarrod was once again behind his desk in the study when Heath opened the door and walked in.

"You didn't show up for lunch." Heath sat down in the chair in front of the desk, "In fact you didn't even say hello to anyone when you came in the door. What's wrong?"

Jarrod picked up the letter he'd received just that morning from the Pinkertons and tossed it to Heath. "It was come in here and get a clear head, or go beat a certain Pinkerton agent to a pulp, which would get me jail time and I prefer my freedom." There was disgust in his voice as he spoke.

Heath's own eyebrows narrowed and hardened steel took the place of his pupils as he read.

'Dear Jarrod Barkley,

In response to your request for an update on our search for your brother, I regret to inform you that we have had to fire the man that was searching for him and have had to start completely over. I am only free to say the agent has failed at more than once case simply by asking too few questions and not handing out the proper information. We have assigned the search for your brother to a more competent agent. We truly regret the wasted time.

Sincerely,

Mr. Jonathon Lowe

"They regret…" Heath exploded as he threw the words out, "It's been two months! He's been gone for two months and they regret they have to start completely over! What kind of fools do they employ?"

Jarrod leaned forward and spoke in his Pappy voice, "Heath, even the Pinkertons are human and, sometimes, have the misfortune of getting a bad apple just like the rest of us. Now, I've been sitting here trying to figure out how to juggle my schedule around so you and I can go back down in that area ourselves, after those horses that you promised to buy from that young woman arrive. Call me crazy, but I can't shake the feeling we were that close to finding him before." He lifted his hand and held his thumb and first finger within an inch of each other and then pointed at the letter in Heath's hands. "And, ever since getting that, I can't help but feel that he's been in that area the whole time. Why he hasn't come home is another story."

Heath tossed the letter down upon the desk. "If you're right, he'd have to be hurt awfully bad not to get word to us somehow." That idea made his sick to the stomach.

"I know." Jarrod sat back in his chair. "That's why I came in here to see what I could do about getting some spare time. Once those horses are here, maybe you can have McCall watch over the ranch for a while. I'm going to cancel a few appointments that can wait," he tapped his fingers upon his calendar, "and I'll talk to Jason Bryce about getting some statements I'll need by the time we get back." He sighed. "To be honest, if I had known about this, I wouldn't have promised, when I was asked, to make sure we were both here when those animals were delivered."

Heath started to say something only to turn at the sound of the door opening once more; it was Victoria. "What's going on in here?" Victoria spoke with 'that tone', the one that told them they wouldn't be able to hide the truth from her if they tried.

Jarrod picked up the letter and, for the hundredth time that day, read it. Victoria stiffened as he finished the letter. "Don't worry, Mother," Jarrod spoke before she had the chance to say anything, "Heath and I will be going down there to look first thing Saturday morning and I hope the agent they have on the case this time will indeed prove more competent than the last one."

Victoria felt as if someone had just doubled the weight she'd been carrying around for the past two months, and it showed in her eyes, even if she did hold herself erect. "We'll find him, Mother." Heath stood up, walked over to her side and spoke, "This time we'll find him, or…" He paused, not wanting to even think of the possibilities that existed.

"Or find out what happened." Victoria's voice choked up a bit as she turned and left the room needing to find a place to be by herself.

The feeling in the room was heavier than it had been in ages; Jarrod sitting looking at his calendar, Heath going over everything he needed to get done before they could start the search once more and both praying like mad that they would be able to find Nick alive. Hurt and mending would not be pleasant, but if he were alive, that would be acceptable. "I'd best go talk to McCall." Heath finally broke the uneasy silence that hung in the room. "He'll need some notice of what's going on."

"Heath," Jarrod spoke up as Heath headed for the door, "we'll find him; one way or the other he's coming home." Heath only gave him a small lopsided grin as he walked out of the room.