Soundwave

Author's Foreword

Eventually C.M.D. began writing them, we laughed, I cried a little bit from both sadness and happiness. Then it randomly turned out that I still had a few appointments to write. It took me a while to start writing them again, I was stuck on Megatron's appointment. Why? Easy! Because the squeaky voice given to The Decepticon leader that instilled fear into everybody's hearts form mentioning of his faction alone was pretty much a stolen cherry on top of an energon-y sundae. Eventually, after a few weeks, I got off my ass, sat down and wrote the rest of the appointments assigned to me one by one over the period of a few weeks until Rumble and Frenzy ...

Looking at the clock, Shockwave found himself quite satisfied with the way this long day had went. He managed to check the seekers all at once, found someone of interest in the process, and Lugnut's appointment was pleasing to say the least; the bomber had no idea he was infected with a virus. The acting CMO sat down at one of the consoles and began typing up the last few reports.

"… it's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday …"

Shockwave slowly raised his head and with a lone, widening eye, he looked at the door leading out into the hallway.

"What is …"

"… partyin' partyin', yeah, fun, fun, fun, fun …"

"What the …" the ACMO got up from his seat and began walking towards the door to see where the horrendous sounds were coming from when suddenly Soundwave barged in, optics leaking with coolant down his faceguard and dancing something to the rhythm.

"… kickin' in the front seat, kickin' in the back seat …"

"Soundwave, what has happened to you?"

"… yesterday was Thursday, Thursday, today it i-is Friday, partyin' …" The communications officer was desperately trying to convey the information but instead kept belting out the abyssal vibrations that the two had the displeasure of hearing.

"Here, take a tablet and write down what happened."

Soundwave took the device and began writing. Shockwave saw the mech write out a few words before his patient froze and dropped the tablet. The chief medical officer picked it up and saw 'It's Friday, Friday'.

"By the All-Spark! Soundwave, lie down."

"… Vi undrar är ni redo att vara med, Armarna upp, nu ska ni få se, Kom igen, Vem som helst kan vara med …" The CO couldn't control his voice and now he completely lost control over his body as it began dancing Caramelldansen.

Shockwave decided to take matters into his own hands. He put down the tablet and tried using his extending arms to restrain the poor mech but was quite rudely interrupted.

"… we're the Russian dancing men, oh yes we're Russian dancing men …" With the new song, Soundwave danced the Russian folk dance, effectively kicking Shockwave off his feet and onto the consoles before kicking them off their hinges and destroying the wall to the storage room.

"… I love to be annoyed by you, no one else can annoy me like you …"

Shockwave, with grunts and curses slowly got up, and tried restraining the officer again but he found it impossible to do.

"… it's peanut butter jelly time, it's peanut butter jelly time …" Came out of the dark storage room as things fell, clicking and clanging, making unbearable noise that for a few seconds even overshadowed the stupid organics' music.

"I am demanding a pay raise."

"… baby we ain't nothing but mammals …"

"This has to stop, NOW!" Shockwave yelled out so fiercely, his one optic sensor projecting so much rage and his very being releasing a wave of killing intent that Soundwave froze in the middle of a back flip.

"What the …"

Soundwave fell out of the darkness of the storage room back into medbay, all covered in random medical equipment and something weird looking on his head.

"Is that a ..." Shockwave took a minute to make sure that it was what he thought it was, "… a Mexican sombrero?"

"… la cucaracha, la cucaracha, ya no puede caminar ..." The mech began dancing on the floor.

"Where did you get it fro… no matter," the Decepticon said, as he wrapped his servos around Soundwave, putting him on the berth and using the restraints, "Now, to treat you."

It was a virus; Shockwave already knew that but was greatly confused as to what kind of a virus. Upon further investigation, with relief, he found out that it was not the same virus that Lugnut had.

"… saaaaaatisfaction, came in a chain reaction …"

Satisfaction was indeed what the CMO was going to feel once this was all over and he would be able to enjoy his evening with a certain teal Decepticon.

"… and darlin', darling, stand by me, oh stand by me …"

Maybe it was a little too early for things like that between the two of them; they just started dating and all.

"… something evil's is watching over you, coming from the sky above …"

Shockwave stopped paying attention to the fleshlings' songs as he thought that he was getting closer to deleting the virus completely from the CO's processor.

"… dare, dare to believe your dreams will survive …"

"There! Virus successfully removed!"

"Allow me to thank you," Soundwave replied, in his normal, metallic voice.

"No need, I was simply doing my job. However, do tell me how you of all Decepticons got infected with such a virus?"

"Question: is doctor-patient confidentiality assured?"

"Indeed, I simply wish for nothing like …," Shockwave stopped for a second, trying to find the correct words but could come up with nothing better than, "… this, ever happens again."

"Answer: Soundwave attempted to break into Autobot mainframe on Earth. End result: virus. Acquisition: Sari Sumdac wrote the virus as a defense mechanism."

"Hm, indeed. All right, off you go."

Soundwave nodded and left the medbay. The CMO could feel the mech smiling, happy that it was all over with.

"Now, let us see what he was really looking at."

Shockwave sat down at the only working console and uploaded the information, looked through it and finally found a link to the World Wide Web.

"Interesting, a virus off a human web site? Let's see. Connecting. Connection established. Hm, curious title, Two Girls One Cup …"

"Shockwave!" Megatron walked into the medbay with an angry look on his faceplates, "Why have you not reported? Shockwave?"

It took Megatron a moment to notice his most loyal follower sitting in the corner, rocking back and forth, servos wrapped tightly around his knees; with his lone eye wider than the Decepticon leader ever saw it, and repeating one thing over and over again.

"… make it stop, make it stop, make it stop …"

"Shockwave," Megatron asked and looked at the monitor, "Is something wro…"

P.S. All humanity has to do to defeat aliens is just show them a few videos like this … I swear they will be just too disturbed and mentally scarred to attack.

Author's Notes:

Yes, another appointment, what you gonna do 'bout it, huh? Thaz righ', you can't do slag 'bout it! Well, you can stop laughing, start feeling bad for poor Shockwave and Ratchet and keep on reading how they are tortured by C.M.D. and me! You know you can't get 'nough of this slagtastically awesometastic appointments! Don' forget to check the rest of them on Crescent-Moon-Demon's profile, the slaggariffic link is in my slagtacular profile!

Thanks to C.M.D. for editing and reviewing!