Back to no-life-ness. Read and review.
Disclaimer: IDONOT OWN PJO&CO. sOME LUCKY TEXAN DOES.
Annabeth's POV
I lost him. He's gone. Gods no where. That's it. Only the gods know. They don't like sharing that kind of information so all I am left to do is cry in the arms of my least-expected friend: Clarisse.
We were standing at the head of my table. Everyone was staring at us. It was the first time I had cried in front of the campers. The latest time had been when I was grieving the loss of my dear, fallen, brave heroes among whom are: Silena Beauregard, Charles Beckendorf, Lee Fletcher, Michael Yew and so many others. That time I cried, I was Percy's arms. And everyone else was crying as well. This time, I was the only one, except for Macey, and everyone was confused.
"Shh," Clarisse patted my head. I was sobbing into her shoulder. It might be weird: me, crying in the embrace of my boyfriend's enemy's daughter. What might sound weirder is that, to everyone else, Percy might just be running late and I would be crying for no reason.
But I knew he was gone. My mother gave the confirmation.
"Annabeth, Clarisse, please walk to the Big House." Chiron said through a stained voice. It was a constant thing for him: love, hate, war, peace, life, death.
Sometimes, blow after blow could leave you prepared for the next one. Other times, the next blow hits harder than the previous.
I was feeling much of the latter.
Clarisse started to lead me away from Macey and Mal, who was looking down at his bowl. He knew I knew.
Mother had told him of Percy's disappearance when I was staring off into the hearth.
Macey whimpered and ran towards me. She tugged at my shirt and I looked down at the crying face of my baby sister.
I lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around my waist and head on my shoulder. Her face was nuzzled into my neck and she was sobbing, which made my tears fall faster. I carried her off to the Big House, with Clarisse at my side.
The last I heard at the pavilion was Mal.
"Okay, everybody, divide yourselves. We are searching to perimeter. I do NOT want to see Annabeth cry that way again. She's been through enough, dammit. Get going!"
I wept when I told Chiron the strange events of the morning. He put on his poker face, which left me more frustrated than before.
Macey sat on my lap, crying into my shirt while Clarisse sat next to me, her arm around my shoulder consolingly.
"We wait," he decided. My heart dropped.
"What?" I yelled.
"We wait, child." He said with finality. Macey knew what was good for her and crawled into Clarisse's arms.
I stood up.
"I just gave one of my best friends, one I loved like a brother, a knife so he could sacrifice his soul and help end the war that I risked so much for!" I was shouting at the centaur in front of me. "I was kidnapped, held the weight of the world on my shoulders when I was fourteen and tortured by a Titan. I lost Percy once before and I waited, only to find out he was 'marooned' on an island with Claypso!" I ranted. My voice broke.
"I can't wait, Chiron. I've risked so much," a new fit of sobs erupted from my chest and the centaur hugged me. I buried my face into his chest.
"I'm afraid there is nothing else we can do, my dear child." He whispered the judgment like he just gave a baby to a cannibal. I sobbed into his chest for a few more minutes then pulled away. I looked back at Clarisse, whose eyes were a little red. Macey was gone.
"I sent her to her cabin. She looked tired," Clarisse said, her voice thick. She must have been remembering when Chris wasn't here...mentally, at least.
"We should go join the search party," I suggested. She had a distant look in her eyes. She nodded and we left the house.
We met Malcolm at the amphitheater, checking things off with every report he received on his pad of paper. He looked up, and gave me another one of his sympathetic looks again. He looked so much like our mother when he did that.
"Negative or positive?" Clarisse barked when she saw his look.
"Negative," he muttered.
I was in such a daze that I didn't catch the rest of the conversation. Why did he leave? Where did he go? What was so important, he had to leave without saying goodbye? Was he with someone? I was staring off into the woods.
So many memories in the woods. The first time we played capture the flag. Percy didn't like my plan since it was just to keep him in place. Of course, he kicked ass and was claimed that day. He soaked Clarisse with the creek water, broke her spear, and when everyone else joined the party, a trident appeared over his head.
Percy had ran away from camp to come save me. He held the weight of the sky on his shoulders for Artemis that winter. It was two years ago.
We found the Labyrinth in these woods. Because Percy oozed with luck, have of the game cornered us, and Percy demanded we enter a crack between the boulders.
The happy memories vanished when I thought about the Labyrinth. It was just the beginning of losing him.
"If you question it, you'll drive yourself mad," Clarisse stood next to me, gazing into the woods.
Instinct told me to run. To find a place where I could think. Where he would go.
I ran to the ocean. It was three miles away from the amphitheater going east, but I ran the entire way. My legs were getting lighter with every step and soon I got the running-high I always got when I ran. Everything blacked out except my destination. I collapsed on the sand when I got there. Five minutes later, Clarisse caught up with me, sitting down next to me. I expected her to follow me. She knew that.
I cried softly. The sea. It reminded me of Percy so much. My Seaweed Brain. My love.
"Talk to me," Clarisse almost pleaded. I looked up at her. She was staring off into the ocean. Clarisse was hard to read. Everyone thought of her as angry all the time. No one cared to inquire why. She must have felt so unloved, until Chris. Her eyes were filled with tears. She might have missed Percy too. She needed someone to beat up.
The waves were wild, and gray. The crests were slamming onto the sand and rocks. It was winter time, but I doubt that was why they waves were so melancholy.
The son of the sea god was missing.
"How's...the search going?" I croaked. She nodded in approval of the search.
"Good. Malcolm IM'ed Thalia. She freaked out a little, but she agreed to help search for Percy. Without Artemis there, Thalia is in charge."
"May I ask you a question?"
"Only if I get to ask you one after," she closed her eyes. I needed some therapy time. I was a wreck. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't breathe regularly and my heart ached.
"Deal. How do you feel, Clarisse? Like for real." I whispered. At first I thought she didn't hear me. The waves were so loud. She was leaning back on the palms of her hands with legs stretched out like mine. She raised her face to the sky and sighed. There was no doubt she was pretty. Her hair was a light brown that coordinated with her light, tan skin. Her eyes were brown. Like chocolate. Her lips were big, ready to shout or smile. Her nose was perfect. She was gorgeous. Not many people realized it though.
"I feel...disturbed. Do you remember when I came here when I was ten? You had just gotten here. You were eight years old. I remember thinking, 'Wow, that girl has courage. She's younger than I am and she can hold her head high.' I was so jealous of you. You were so pretty. So smart. You had everything to me." She opened her eyes and looked at me, smiling a little embarrassed. I always forgot she was two years older than me.
"But you kick ass! That's why you have so much respect! You're a true child of Ares!" I protested.
"I know," she chuckled. "I was so scared those first few months. I was scared I wouldn't make any friends. I did, though. I found you and Chris. You had so much on your little eight year old mind, you weren't really with me much. At first I thought it was because I was a bully. I wasn't claimed those first few months. I was finally claimed after my first capture the flag. I was so scared, Annabeth. I don't like bullying. It's my nature, though. I always fought for my voice to be heard. I always had to do that. Chris listened. He was the only one who did. You had so much to think about. Your best friend turned into a tree. Your other best friend was angry at everything. You were so young." She closed her eyes again. She had started to cry.
"People have, and still do, think of me as the big bully who gets pissed easily and hardly ever feels emotions. I do, though. It's just so hard to share them. Not my thing, you know? Well, anyway, I continued living in my shell for another four years. Then your doofus came to camp," she smiled at the memory. She wasn't smiling then.
"Yeah. He should did cause an upstart, huh?" I fought back the tears.
"That's an understatement. No one's life has been the same since then. He made me realize how bad it was to look like the bully I was. He knocked me down to size. You guys went on your ques-er, first quest and came back successfully. More or less. I was jealous. I had been at camp for four years, at the time. He had only been there a day and a half! My father expected so much from me. I tried, yes, I tried. He should know that, my father should. The next quest you two snuck off to was my quest. You saved me. I owe you my life-"
"Don't mention it," I blurted out. It wasn't like me to say stuff like that. It was Percy's place to blurt shit out.
"Ha, okay. I won't. Anyway, you two pretty much screwed up my relationship with my father. The nest summer I went into the Labyrinth. I lost Chris. The only one who understood. I lost him. It was horrible: watching him suffer and deteriorate. So scary." Her voice trembled. "I was too proud to fight at first in the war. Silena made a mistake, which had cost her her life. I was hurt after that. I used my emotions to lead me into battle. I kicked ass. I had the true blessing of Ares. I still have not avenged her death, Annabeth." Tears fell onto her shirt.
"I am disturbed because shit can't be left alone. Silena had it going great. So did Beckendorf. They were so brave. They really did die for love, Annabeth. The gods disturb me with their...antics."
"No matter what happens, I will never forgive the gods for Silena and Beckendorf's lives." She finished, tears streaming down her beautiful face. I looked at the ocean. The waves were getting wilder. I didn't think Poseidon appreciated Clarisse's comment, no matter how justified she was.
"So," she looked at me. "How do you feel? Like really. Tell me about your grief." She said, watching me stare off into the sea, where I could only hope Percy was.
A/N So...I hoped you enjoyed. It's like 3AM and I'm starving. How'd you like Clarisse's feelings? Did they make sense? Do you disagree? TELL ME! rofl.
Thanks, love, AJ121