A/N: Hello, everybody! Thanks for the reviews! I'll say more at the end, but for now, here's chapter two of The Horrors of Babysitting!

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Chapter Two

The Power of CAFFEINE!

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Sunset, Kent thought, finally. Now we can put Roy to bed and I can get some sleep.

He had just endured several hours worth of Roy singing/screaming songs about bologna and hot dogs, listening to the sounds of constantly-breaking things, a flying cat (who had apparently been dubbed Oscar by Sain) and Sain and his Cocoa Puffs. He couldn't wait for it to be Roy's bedtime so he'd be able to put the boy to bed and hopefully get some sleep himself.

Kent looked around in search of Roy's familiar red hair. The boy was nowhere to be found. The sounds of things breaking had stopped as well. Maybe he's worn himself out and fallen asleep somewhere. No, that would just be too good to be true. For some reason, Kent felt that his cereal-loving friend might have something to do with it.

"Sain," Kent said, "have you seen Roy lately?"

Sain was currently in the middle of enjoying his Cocoa Puffs, and therefore it took him a few moments to respond, or even notice Kent's presence. "Oh," he said finally, "What?"

The red-haired cavalier sighed before repeating himself. "Lord Eliwood's son," he started slowly, so Sain's Cocoa Puff-infested mind could comprehend.

"Oh, yeah, the kid," Sain said with a nod, "Whatta 'bout him?"

"Have you seen him?"

"Not since about thirty minutes ago," Sain replied.

Suddenly, the topic of their conversation came out of the kitchen, holding an EMPTY (DUN DUN DUN!) 2-LITER COCA-COLA BOTTLE!

"Way to chug the pop, Roy!" Sain commented.

Roy had an unreadable expression on his face. It was an odd, almost evil-looking smile. Oscar crept away from him, terrified. Roy's eyes were wide, so wide that they looked as though they'd permanently be stuck that way, and Kent could swear that the little boy's stomach stuck out at least three inches than normal.

"Sain, did you give that to him?" Kent asked, unsure if he'd be able to maintain composure if he answered "yes."

"Yeah," Sain replied casually, "the kid said he was tired, so I did what any mature, responsible guardian would do – I gave him Coke!"

Sain was anything but mature and responsible – Kent knew that, but he thought that he'd have a little more common sense than this. But, he should've known better than to think Sain had grown up any in the last few hours. His maturity levels were represented best by the fact that he was twenty-five years old, knew both Oscar Mayer theme songs by heart, and that his favorite food was Cocoa Puffs.

"Sain," Kent seethed quietly, "do you know what you've done?"

Before Sain could reply, there came an annoying fit of giggles. Roy was laughing uncontrollably, and for no apparent reason. Oscar the cat looked threatened by this new noise, and jumped onto Sain's lap.

"It's too late," Kent said, shaking his head, "We lost him."

" 'We lost him?'" Sain repeated, confused, before he was barraged by a ton of Roy's undecipherable, super-fast questions and comments.

Roy took a deep breath. And then it began.

"I like coffee. Don't you like coffee? I think we should go get some coffee, right now. Dogs are great but cats are better, cause you can throw 'em around and they still land on their feet. Don't you think that's cool how they can land on their feet? Ya know what? My dad has a funny name: Eliwood. Don't you think that's so funny? Grandma and Gramdpa's names start with "El" too. That's weird. Don't you think that's just so weird? Lyndis is kinda a funny name too, but Hector sounds normal. Hey, did you know that Lyn and Hector are married? Lyn called you a "womanizer," Sain. What's a "womanizer?" Heh heh. Your name is funny, too. Don't you think that..."

Sain could not understand a single word Roy was saying, but it was amusing to watch. Roy continued to babble on and on. "What is this kid on?" Sain asked a bewildered Kent, who had collapsed on the couch as far away from Sain as humanly possible. "What isn't he on?"

Roy had gone onto yet another topic – something about how oranges are orange and pineapples are not, and about why you should never try to make Marcus' horse wear a dress. How these two topics were related, Kent didn't know. What he did know was that getting Roy to sleep now would be next to impossible.

Kent watched helplessly as the caffeine-high Roy ran into another room. A few moments later, the young lord returned wielding, or attempting to wield, one of his father's blades. Kent tried to get it away from him before he hurt himself, but Roy was recklessly swingling the sword around, and he had to dodge it. Roy struck one of the table legs with the sword and set it ablaze.

Sain nearly choked on his Cocoa Puffs. How in Elimine's name did he do that! It took him a moment to remember that Roy was a mamkute – a half-dragon – and had the ability to (unintentionally) set things on fire. As Kent ran to get water, the boy was put in a sort of trance as he watched the flames grow. Roy threw the sword, no longer interested in it, and pinned a a very frightened kitty to the wall by it's Oscar Mayer bandana with it. Its eyes had grown to the size of saucers.

Great, Kent thought as he returned with a large cup of water, we've got a charred table let, a hole in the wall, several broken items, and from the looks of it, an almost-severed cat. Not to mention that at this rate Sain is going to consume all the food in the kitchen.

After Kent had doused the flames, Roy sat there, staring at the burnt table for a while before noticing the cat stuck to the wall. "KITTY!" he yelled, as Oscar attempted to run away, but was held back due to the fact that he was still pinned to the wall. The cat emitted a high-pitched screaming noise as Roy lunged for it.

"This is fun," Sain said, still eating his cereal, "See, Kent? I told you this would be fun!"

Kent grumbled as Sain stuck his hand into the box again and came up with nothing. He tried again, but reached nothing but crumbs. He stared at his empty hand. Sain held the box up and looked inside, but saw no Cocoa Puffs. He held the box upside down and shook it, but nothing came out.

"They're all gone..." Sain whispered.

"What are you talking about?" Kent asked, irritated and tired.

"The Cocoa Puffs..." Sain said, "...they're all gone... and Roy's gone over to the Dark Side..."

Kent was questioning the brown-haired cavalier's sanity for what must've been the millionth time that night. There's really something wrong with him. I think he was dropped on his head a few too many times as a baby.

"This can only mean one thing..." Sain said. Suddenly, he smiled a big, cheesy smile. "It's time for Lucky Charms!"

Kent watched wordlessly as Sain went into the kitchen to get more cereal. Oscar tore around the room as Roy chased him, screaming something about how he needed a bath.

Two more days. That's it. Just two days. Kent closed his eyes and tried to prevent the oncoming migraine.

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A/N: Well, there ya go! Another round of The Horrors of Babysitting! So, whaddya think? Was it as funny this time around?

Thank you Narakusnoone, Tempo90, rome, Gingy Mittens, random – man, Halloween Sora, The Silver Kitty, Kiriku, narugurlee 13 and Cool-Chan for your reviews! Glad you guys liked it! (I feel loved! )

Hmm... yes, Serra would make things interesting. (Of course, Sain would probably just try to flirt with her or something. 0.o) Thank you, Narakusnoone, for that idea. Expect to see Serra in one of the next couple chapters!

I don't know who Rei and Lugh are, Gingy Mittens, but if you told me what Jaffar and Nino look and act like to jog my memory, they might get a cameo appearance in here somewhere. But you have to remind me what they're like, cause I'll never remember by myself!

Thank you for that idea, Tempo90! I think I'll use it in chapter 3 in junction with my idea to create mass havoc! What's my idea, you ask? You'll have to wait and see...

Oh, and to narugurlee 13: Spoiler Alert, peeps! To my understanding, Ninian is Roy's mother. She's the only Fire Emblem character who qualifies, because Roy's a half dragon, and Ninian has the ability to change into a dragon. Yes, lots of support endings say that Eliwood and Lyn have a child named Roy, but it makes sense with Ninian. You can see this ending if you get level A support level between Eliwood and Ninian. She dies, but is resurrected. It's a long story. There has been a lot of disagreements about this...

Again, thanks for your reviews, and you have any ideas, you can tell me. Don't be disappointed if a certain character or something doesn't make it in or something. Remember, this is centered on Roy, Kent, and Sain.

R&R, please!