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Chapter 2

Now all I had to do was go to the house and grovel to my dying father. I hadn't held the grudge for so long – it was just that I didn't know how to come back. I kept putting it off and when Becca called me two days ago to tell me that Dad was in bad shape, I was finished packing my stuff and trying to figure out what to do. La Push was the only option then because I had to fix things. I didn't want to live with the guilt of knowing that I didn't apologize when I could have, but in reality I could live with it. I just didn't want to, but my dad… he didn't deserve it. He needed to know that he wasn't a horrible father – I wouldn't be able to live with that.

La Push looked exactly the same from what I remembered – at least from what I saw. I drove directly from the garage to the house, but I didn't exactly get that far. I parked down the street watching the house and giving myself time. It seemed smaller but less dinky? Someone had been repairing it – new paint and the ramp had been redone. Jacob was a good son…

I debated on whether I should go to a motel or not, but I needed to do this. When I pulled up, I saw movement in the house – probably the dick who I talked to on the phone. By the time I was out of the jeep, he was outside on the front porch watching me.

"Miss Rachel?" he called. When I opened my mouth to yell at him, I remembered that only one person ever called me that.

"Seth?" He was huge. Tall and muscular – and hot. He had to be about twenty five.

"What are you doing here?" he asked with a smile and a hug – a really warm hug. I had to shake my head to keep my mind clear. I used to babysit this boy… man. Boy-man. I closed my eyes until the six year old with the penny stuck up his nose appeared in my mind.

"I'm… here for Dad. I heard he had a turn for the worse," I cleared my throat. It was the first time I was saying it out loud.

"Uh…" he stared at me with a blank look. "Besides being old and the diabetes, Billy's still kicking hard…"

"What? But-"

"He should be up soon. I would wake him up, but he really needs his afternoon nap or he'll get really cranky."

"My dad's okay?"

"Yeah," Seth smiled reassuringly.

"But…" Rebecca. Damn it, I should have known. And that douche! "Seth, who else is here? I talked to someone on the phone…"

"Oh you mean – uh oh," he turned around and hurried back inside.

I followed him inside expecting to find it clean and empty with the same old furniture. But it wasn't – it was kinda lived-in messy and there were new pieces mixed in with the old and a noticeably new, large TV screen. Hushed voices sounded from the back bedroom and Seth came back into the living room looking guilty.

"Ooops, I forgot to move his chair back," he said dropping on the couch and turning on the TV.

"Damnit Seth, you shouldn't be even using my chair. Who knows-" Dad rolled into the room, stopping at the sight of me.

"I wasn't using it I was just sitting in it. I've learned my lesson – no pop wheelies," he continued flipping channels as Dad just stared at me.

"Hi…" I breathed nervously. He was still staring at me – not getting angry or upset or happy – just a blank stare with Seth mumbling about what was on television.

"Look Billy look, 101 Dalmatians," he cackled. "I bet you wouldn't mind skinning us sometimes."

"You look so much like your mother…" Dad finally spoke.

"Dad you were right – I'm sorry. I was wrong," I bursted into tears falling into the closest chair. I tried hiding my face in my hands as I blubbered on about Doug and the last fifteen years.

"Ssssh… Girlie-girl, it's okay. It's okay…" Dad pulled me onto his lap and held me as I cried into his shoulder. I cried even harder when he called me Girlie-girl because when I was little that was exactly what I wanted to be. I had that stereotypical mindset as a kid and wanted to be the best girl ever. I wore makeup and dresses and I wanted to be a waitress, a maid, and a teacher. Dad liked the hairdresser phase the best because I would always brush out his hair… I turned out so different than I had planned.

I cried until my head ached and the snot had stopped pouring from my face, and then I felt warm arms carry me off as I drifted to sleep.

...

When I woke up, I felt a whole lot better. Sleeping helped, but it might have been the bed. Comfortable was an understatement. The sheets were soft and warm and they smelled like… man. I didn't remember Doug ever smelling this good – but maybe my memory was construed because of recent developments.

"But why'd you put her in my bed?"

"Billy told me to, plus it was her bed first."

"I can hear you," I grumbled lowly. Was this my old bed? My old room? I looked around trying to sit up.

The hushed voices stopped and the door opened as Seth poked his head in. "Hey, feeling better?"

"Hey," I choked, my throat dry. "Yeah, but I really need a shower… I need my keys – my bag in the car…"

"Already done," Seth nodded to the pile of suitcases on the other bed…

"Oh thanks…" I blinked.

I stumbled out of bed as Seth closed the door, and I quickly found my shower bag with my expensive shampoos and special moisturizing body wash. I stared at them thinking that they're so out of place here. When I think of the rez, I think of hot, sweaty and dirty summers and firey pinewood winters. I just grabbed the shampoo deciding on being more La Push and less LA. I didn't need fancy shampoo here. I didn't need to smell like a Tahitian moonflower. I needed to smell like me. I needed to be me or at least find out who me was because for the last few years I've felt me slipping away… I needed to be in one of those old Julia Roberts movies. Preferably one with a –

Holy mother of raspberries! I stopped in the bathroom doorway. There was a half naked man with a very nice muscular back and he was… peeing.

"Oh sorry!" I jumped backward in the hall.

"Learn to knock, will ya?" he yelled, his voice familiar.

"The door was open. Why would I knock on an open door? Learn to close it," I snapped.

"Wow, so much hostility…"

"I think I'm allowed."

"I'm sure you do…" he said with the water running in the sink.

"Hey," I stuck my head in the door. "I'm allowed because you were a jackass on the phone and you hung up on me when I was stranded on the highway."

"I'm," he started, his eyes locking with mine in the mirror. He was very handsome and it made me want to hate him even more. His face fell before setting his jaw and turning around not looking at me.

"You're what?" I questioned.

"Sorry. Excuse me," he nodded curtly before squeezing himself between and the door jam. He didn't touch me, but I could feel heat coming off of him. I heard the front door slam as he left, and I hated myself when I looked in the mirror.

Because I looked like a dried up squishy fish and I wished that I smelled like a Tahitian moonflower.

AN: Who could that strange man be? hmmm

Sorry meant to update two days ago but yeah I suck. Also because chapters are short I'm going to try to update faster, but I haven't figured out the exact ending so I'll be posting 'slowly' until I do.

thanks for reading!