Sarah's POV

No! Get down!" I shrieked. I kept screaming louder and louder.

But it was all a dream.

I woke up with tears in my eyes, surrounded by my teammates.

"Baby, listen to me. Relax. Breathe, everything is just fine." Ryan softly cooed. I cried on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around me. A couple minutes later, I finally gathered myself together.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Well, Cardoza and Swaye are in surgery this very moment. You must've fallen asleep while you were waiting."

"Are you okay?" Calleigh asked while handing me a box of tissues.

"I think so." I answered. Just then, a doctor came in with a wooden clipboard. He looked at us eye to eye, but didn't mutter a word.

He shook his head in remorse.

"Jesse Cardoza was admitted into the E.R. at 2:31 pm. He had a fatal gunshot to the heart. I'm sorry. Jesse Cardoza passed away at 2:43 pm this afternoon. We tried everything we could."

"My hands flew through my hair, and I began to cry again. I ran out of the hospital. I paced back and forth on the sidewalk, letting the tears run down my face. My hands shook uncontrollably. The words I just heard, they couldn't register within my body. Jesse, he's … dead. It's my entire fault.

"SARAH! SARAH!" I heard my name being called from the entrance of the hospital. There stood Horatio. He jogged over to where I was. As he removed his glasses from his face, he pulled out his handkerchief and gave it to me. As I wiped my face, the cloth had collected every inch of my makeup.

"Horatio, I'm so sorry." I spoke.

"Sarah, it's not your fault." He told me.

"Horatio, it is. Jesse took the bullet for me. I'm supposed to be the one in the hospital bed right now, not him."

"Jesse was looking out for you, and that's what teammates are supposed to do. You didn't know that he was going to die. No one did. Don't beat yourself up over this." He responded. I silently wiped the rest of my tears away.

"Come back inside."

"Horatio, I can't. I can't do it."

"Sarah, listen to me. Yes you can. You can do this. You are strong enough to do it." He extended his hand towards me. I held and forced myself to smile for the time being.

We walked into the hospital again. I wish none if this was happening. As if dreaming about getting all shot up in a hospital was enough, now I have to face a real tragedy right before my eyes. And on top of that…

Mid-day sickness. Yuck.

As I rushed out to the bathroom, I heard Calleigh follow.

"Sarah honey, are you alright?" She asked. After a few moments which felt like hours, I weakly responded.

"Yeah, mid-day sickness." I rested my head on my hand and took a deep breath.

"Come on, let's go rinse your mouth out. I have some breath mints in my purse if you need one." She put her hand on my back.

"Calleigh, I still haven't told him yet." I shyly admitted.

"What?" She asked in astonishment. "It's almost two months! You gotta tell him sometime soon!"

"I know, I know. But so much has happen from the first time I tried, up to now."

"I understand, just be brave and tell him, I'm sure things will go fine!"

"Okay Calleigh. I'll do it today. Hopefully." I quickly added on. I went to the water fountain to get a drink of water and rinsed out my mouth. We returned to the waiting room. The men were all sitting in the seats with their hands either grasped tightly together, or lost in their hair.

"You all can go home for tonight, It's been a long day, and a tough one at that. Get plenty of rest. I'll make the calls to Jesse's family. We'll discuss more tomorrow in my office." Horatio proceeded out the hospital. I took a seat next to Ryan.

"Ryan, I can't be alone tonight. Can I stay over tonight, please?" I asked.

"Of course. I'll meet you there." He gave me a quick peck on my lips, and I smiled.

"Okay." I watched as he exited the room. One by one, each person left the room, until I was the last one. I had to make one more stop before I went home, and that was to visit Dominick's hospital room.

As I opened the door, a nurse had stopped me.

"Can I help you ma'am?" She asked.

"Um," I started. "No, I'm just visiting."

"Oh, he's still sleep from the surgery. You can leave him a note or something, he'll read it when he wakes up."

"Thank you." I smiled. I walked around the bed, narrowing my eyes as I glanced at him.

"You sick son of a bitch." I whispered. I grabbed a pen and a piece of paper and wrote:

You killed a police officer today. And unless you can get a very good defense attorney, which I doubt you'll find, you'll be in prison for life. Surrender now. Tell us where your partner is, or things won't turn out good.

I folded the paper in half, and slipped it under his hand.

Later that night, after I had taken a very long, hot, relaxing and soothing shower, I dressed myself in a pair of UofWM (University of Wisconsin-Madison) sweatpants, a plain black shirt, and my black sneakers. I decided to take the long way to Ryan's house, so I could prepare myself for what might happen tonight.

I finally arrived at Ryan's house. I inhaled one last deep breath, and proceeded to get out of the car. I knocked on the door lightly. In a matter of less than 10 seconds, Ryan answered.

"Hey baby." He kissed me and held me by my waist. It made me smile, and forget about everything. Except for what I had to tell him. I figured that there was no sense in trying to hide it much longer.

"Ryan, I have something to tell you. But maybe you should sit down first, just in case.

"Is it bad?" He looked worried.

"Um, no, not at all. I hope you'll be happy."

"I hope I am too. So what's up?"

"I'm a month and a half pregnant." I spoke out. I saw his jaw drop, but he quickly got himself together.

"I'm going to be a father?" I shook my head yes.

"Oh my God." I saw a smile creep upon his face. He jumped up towards the phone. "This is amazing. I have to go tell Eric, and – and – and Horatio and Walter and Jesse!" He paused for a moment, and I watched as his happiness faded away. An awkward silence ran through the room. Finally, he began to speak again.

"How far along are you?"

"About a month and a half. I was so scared to tell you, but it worked out better than I had expected it to be."

"Wow, this is great." He couldn't stop smiling.

"I have to bring you home to meet the rest of my family soon. My mom is so excited to have a grandson. My dad too. Oh, and my sister is going to love you! I can't wait." I eagerly smiled.

"Neither can I." He grinned.

"You know, Thanksgiving is next month. Maybe you can come home with me then?" I offered.

"That sounds great." We relocated to the bedroom. I slid into the bed first. A couple minutes later, Ryan climbed into bed and wrapped his arms around me. I smiled as we cuddled.

"You know, I'm gonna miss Jesse. I was just getting to know him too." I said.

"Yeah, he was a great guy. A really nice addition to the team. But he's in a better place now. I don't want you to stress this too much." Ryan kissed my forehead.

"I won't, I promise. I just hope our new replacement is as good as him."

"I do too baby, I do too." He turned off the lamp. He rested his arm lightly around my stomach. Today has been a rough day. And it's not even over yet. But it's things like this that have to motivate you. My motivation right now is to find justice for Jesse, because he deserves it. I just wish it was all a part of my dream.

Wow, how long has it been? About like 5 months ? Sheesh I'm sorry ! Well, I did some thinking, and I think I'm going to extend this story. Idk how far, but it's going to be longer than 25 chapters. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, sorry for the tardiness :x Happy Easter, &Happy Mother's Day and all the other holidays I missed ! I should be updating soon, but graduation is coming up, so it's all about the work work work ! Lol, love you guys, see you next time ! xoxoxo – Mariah .