A/N- Made using Pandora Radio and a list of random words my crazy friends gave me, especially The Green Mushuguna. Thanks to them and my awesome reviewers! I own nothing. Enjoy and please review!
Scarf
"Hello?"
"Hi."
"Hey."
"Whatcha doing?" It came out ridiculously dorkier than Blaine intended it to be in his head.
"Talking to you, silly. I'm also rearranging my scarf collection."
"How many scarves do you own?" Kurt mumbled something unintelligible. "What was that?"
"A few hundred."
"..."
"I know, I have a problem."
"Will you go with me to BreadstiX tonight?"
"Of course! What time?"
"I'll pick you up at 7. And Kurt?"
"Yes?"
"Wear your Alexander McQueen scarf." With a wink no one could see. Blaine ended the call.
Kurt stared at his phone in shock. "FINN!"
"Wha-?"
"Did you tell Blaine about Rose's Turn and the events that took place before it?" His tone was almost desperate.
"Yeah, when he was over here last time... He asked if he'd missed any crucial stages in your life and wanted me to fill him in."
Kurt groaned in defeat, flopping facedown on his bed. "If Rachel or Quinn ever asks what you used to be like, I'm telling them about the time you tried to dry your shoes with the George Foreman."
Finn looked horrified. "Dude, you wouldn't."
"You broke the bro code, Finn."
Apologize
"I bet you just want to go back to your stupid jock boyfriend! You want Karofsky to plant another one on you in the locker room, right?"
Kurt stared in shock, his glasz eyes filling with tears of hurt and anger. He spun on his heel, starting to the door.
He caught him by the wrist. "Kurt, I didn't mean it."
"You meant every word." He hissed back. "Don't lie to me."
"No, I didn't. I was upset, and I just sort of... blew my cool."
"You know how sensitive I am about that. I can't believe you would throw it in my face like it wasn't you comforting me then, confronting him, sticking up for me. I guess you were just showing off your 'courage', hmm?" Kurt was crying.
"Of course not! I love you, Kurt. I'm so sorry. I just had this word vomit, this angry verbal diarrhea and the words just spilled out of my mouth and I couldn't stop them. Sort of like now..." Blaine grasped Kurt's other hand, spinning him completely to be face-to-face, and took a deep breath. "I know I can never fully apologize for my complete rudeness, insensitivity, and general douchebaggery, so I am completely at your mercy for as long as your want."
"Blaine, shut up." Kurt smiled slightly. "You don't have to be my bitch for the rest of your life. I forgive you."
"Oh, good."
"I never said you weren't going to be my bitch at all. Now take me to the mall. I have some retail therapy to take care of. And I want a Belgian waffle freshly prepared and at my door every morning. Or croissants. With butter."
Spider
Making out with Blaine on his bed had to be Kurt's favorite pastime ever. Their bodies tangled together, sitting up and gripping onto each other for dear life. Their tongues roamed each other's mouths, exploring, tasting, and memorizing. Blaine's tongue softly stroked the roof of Kurt's mouth, causing the countertenor to moan and grip his hair tightly, pulling him closer. When Blaine began to trail kisses down his neck, Kurt groaned. "Oh, god, Blai-" He froze.
"What?"
"It's a spider." He whispered in terror.
Blaine glanced at the foot of the bed. "It's just a little daddy-long-legs. It won't hurt you." He moved to kiss his boyfriend again.
"What are you doing? I'm not going to make out with you with a spider watching us!" Kurt scooted away, horrified. The spider moved and he whimpered in fear. "Kill it!"
"I'm not going to kill the poor spider that never did anything to us. I'll set it free." Blaine scooped up the spider, which he'd secretly named Charlie, and carried him over to the open window, throwing him out. "Bye Charlie," Blaine whispered. He turned back to his boyfriend. "Can we continue now?"
"Not until you go wash your hands."
Blaine headed to the bathroom, glancing back at the window. "I'm sorry Charlie." He whispered.
Sims
"What is that?" Wes asked.
Blaine quickly shut his laptop, spinning around guiltily. "Nothing."
"Are you watching porn?" Wes snatched the laptop from him and opened it, sighing in relief when it revealed no porn. Because that just would have been awkward. "Oh, it's just The Sims 2."
"Yep, give it back."
"Wait, why? Who's in the house?" Wes hovered the mouse over the faces of a sim who looked strangely familiar. A small text box popped up with the words 'Kurt Anderson-Hummel.' He clicked on the other face to reveal a 'Blaine Anderson-Hummel'. "You made you and Kurt!" Wes gasped in shock.
"Give me that." Blaine snatched his laptop back. "You cannot tell anyone about this."
"Only if you let me see their memories."
"Fine." Blaine clicked on 'Memories.'
"Met Kurt, Made Friends With Kurt, Became Best Friends With Kurt, Fell In Love With Kurt, Kissed Kurt For The First Time, Did WooHoo With Kurt... Really, Blaine?"
"Shut up and read."
"Got Engaged To Kurt, Got Married To Kurt, Adopted BJ... Who the hell is BJ?"
"Our son. It stands for Blaine Junior."
"Adopted A Kitten, Taught BJ To Walk, Taught BJ To Talk, BJ Grew Up Well... That's it?"
"For now."
"You know I am obliged to tell Kurt about this."
Blaine shrugged. "Go ahead. Who do you think named our son?"
Glasz
"God, you have the most beautiful eyes." Blaine whispered, his forehead resting softly on Kurt's.
"They're nothing special."
"Are you kidding? They're like... I can't even begin to explain. They change colors. Sometimes they're blue as the sky, or greener than jade. They can be grey like storm clouds, or a mixture of any of those. They're like... glasz. Like the morning sea."
Kurt giggled, his heart warming. "You took time to describe my eyes like that?"
"Your eyes deserve a Facebook page. I'm going to make one." Blaine leaned forward, kissing him softly. When they broke apart, Kurt touched his boyfriend's cheek gently. "I love you."
"I love you more."
"Watch it, Anderson."
A/N- Reviews would rock my Klainebow colored socks. And I totally just had to add Klainebow to the dictionary.