Chapter 18

Lily entered the common room and immediately started looking for James. It was a Friday night, so the only students in the Common room were some 4th years studying and a few 1st years sitting alone, Lily greeted some of the younger students she knew before leaving out of the portal. If I was James where would I be? She thought as she walked, well, obviously, he would be with Sirius and the otter marauders. But where would they be? Breaking the rules in every way imaginable, but where? Lily kept walking. She asked some students if they had seen him and they all pointed her in opposite directions. Just as Lily was beginning to give up hope, she saw Adrian and Michelle walking a corridor and decided to at least walk back with them to the Tower.

"Hey guys wait up!" she called out, jogging to catch up with them.

"Hey Lils" Adrian said smiling, but it was a sad smile. Michelle looked like she was going to cry.

"Are you guys ok? You're acting weird."

"We're fine." Michelle said drawing out the first word "I just feel horrible that I didn't know."

Lily was definitely confused now. "Didn't know what?"

"About Constance, James just told us."

Some thin lifeline broke inside of Lily. One of the last shreds of trust snapping in two.

"He? Wha'?" complete words weren't even possible

"Just told us, back by the lake. I feel so bad about not knowing. I mean, we're your friends, were suppose to know these things. I feel like I've been some selfish…." Michelle said more but Lily couldn't hear it over the blood pounding in her ears.

"Who?"

"who what?"

"Who did he tell?"

"oh, um, let me think it was me, Adrian, Sirius, Lupin, Peter, Frank, Alice and a few other 5th year ravenclaws that I always forget the names of."

Everyone she had tried so hard to keep it from.

"How much… Did he tell?" She chocked out and Michelle immediately saw something was wrong.

"He just told us how she totally rejected you as a sister, called you names, got hit by a car and then was willing to die instead of touch you."

So in other words, all of it.

Lily couldn't breathe, her throat was being strangled from the inside out. Vision blurred, she grew cold while she began to sweat. Tears were beginning to roll down her cheecks no matter how hard she tried to retain them.

"Lily…" Adrian said reaching out to comfort her…

"NO!" She said not to Adrian alone, but more the whole world..."nonono, he told? But how? Why?"

The corridor started to slant up, Her legs turned to lead. She had the urge to vomit. Bending over she put her hands on her knees, her tears making spots on the stone floor.

"Lily?" A concerned voice asked, gradually growing closer. His "concerned" voice. "Are you alright?" He put a hand on her back.

Lily couldn't believe he had the nerve to actually touch her.

"NO, I'M NOT OK YOU SICK BASTARD! HOw COULD YOU TELL THEM? ALL OF THEM? I CAN'T BELIEVE I TRUSTED YOU! I NEVER WANT TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN.!" She screamed and tore down the hall, running faster than her legs could possibly propel her. The burning sensation in her legs almost matched the pain to the crumbling sensation in her heart.

"What's wrong dear Lily?" The Fat Pink Lady said when she reached her

"LILY!" She turned around to see James racing up the stairs after her. She swung back around to the portrait ." Gillyweed. Gillyweed, Gillyweed, GILLYWEED" She screeched, the fat lady finally seemed to snap out of her confusion and opened the entrance. Immediately it slammed shut after her.

"Gilly weed." James said to the Fat Lady. She grimly shook her head

"Whadya mean no?"

"That's not the password anymore." She said grimly

"Yes it is!" He protested

"no its not, the new password is a very detailed explanation. Hurry up now."

Once She was safe inside the common room, she raced up to the dorm. Throwing the door open she practically fell into Gemma's Arms, saltwater-tears paving her face.

"Lily?" Gemma shrieked "What is wrong?"

"He told them he told ALL of them…" she moaned into her chest

"Who told them what?

"James he told them about Constance, he told EVERYONE about her, I can't believe I trusted him… now everyone KNOWS!" The words were met by a new wave of sobs and a chill in Gemma's arms.

"You told James?" She asked coolly

Lily nodded, like a judge agreeing to a death sentence "I thought I could trust him…. I can't believe I was going to tell him about Arameo… What did I do wrong Gem?" She blubbered.

Gemma closed her eyes and turned her face up rubbing her hands against her best friends back. She reached down and pulled her comforter around them rocking Lily back and forth like a child. James was going to pay for this one dammit.

"Look I'm telling you, I don't know what's wrong." James insisted vainly again.

"Well it obviously had to do with you."

James was so sick of this. Hours before, he had been sitting with his friends by the lake, swapping stories, someone had said something that reminded him of Lily's Constance story, so he told it. HE was a little surprised how no one knew about it; but not completely shocked.

And now here he was. Standing at the painting entrance, after midnight. When anyone else had come, The Fat Lady would let them in, but not James.

For Hell sakes it has been two hours

"Yes but I don't know what I did wrong, if you would let me in I could talk to her-"

"Absolutely not Mr. Potter. Lily is a nice girl, I will not let her be hurt."

"I don't know how I hurt her!"

The fat lady opened her mouth again, but the portal opened and Gemma stepped out. Before James could even say a word, Gemma hit him in the chest with a disarming spell so hard he flew back to the other side of the hall, hit the wall and sunk to the floor.

"Nice hit." The Fat Lady said.

Gemma stomped over to where her cousin was starting to stand up

"HOW could you? I can't believe I'm even related to you! Hopefully the motive to act like a jackass isn't hereditary and is only acquired because you were dropped several times as a child! Too bad you survived the fall!" She flicked her wand, sentencing him to the Bat-Boogie hex.

After watching him run around, screaming while being chased by imaginary creatures for several minutes. Gemma hit him hard with a counter curse, it was time to scream more.

"I have SO many things I want to call you but for the sake of these painting ears I'll refrain and stick to killing you!"

"Gemma Calm down-"

"CALM DOWN? YOU BROKE MY BEST FRIENDS HEART AND YOU THINK I SHOULD "CALM DOWN"?" She hit him with several more hexes, his pain growing increasingly, she felt the jerk deserved it.

"What did I do?" HE asked during a small interval while Gemma was trying to decide which hex was more painful. She froze when he said this/

"What did you do?" She said slowly walking towards him as he backed against the wall. HE was surprised a hiss could be this terrifying. "What did you do? I'll tell you what you did. YOU broke my best friends' heart by telling everyone within earshot one of her deepest secrets."

"I didn't know it was a secret."

Gemma laughed "How thick are you James?" She asked "Think of how she told you, it wasn't exactly at dinner for everyone to hear."

"Well-" she had him there-"that doesn't mean it was a complete secret, I mean she told others, she told you-"

"No she didn't"

"She- what?"

"She didn't tell me, her parents did, they grateful she had a friend even after that happened. SHE never told me, YOU were the first person she's told, trusted, with this. You were the one to break everything she saw in you. Anything you did that made her like you. Well congratulations, she officially hates you."

Even before Gemma's speech was done, James had understood the seriousness of what he had done. He hadn't stopped to think before he acted. He had made damage that seemed impossible to fix. He had ruined the girl he loved.

"I'm so sorry." He hadn't even realized it was said out loud. His sense were blurred by the cold permafrost that settled over him as her thought of what she must be feeling right now.

"You better be, and you'll be even more sorry when I'm finished with you, and trust me cuz, I'm nowhere near finished.

Well that's an interesting little twist, I don't think you guys saw that coming. This chapter was actually fun to write

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LIZIES