A/N: Upon an ~overwhelming response, here is Spermies, chapter 4. We get really poetic in this chapter, so I would hold on to your horses and keep your hands inside of the vehicle, folks. Yee-har.
Dear Diary,
Dug here (who else).
How are you today? Has your day been okay?
Because mine has been shit.
Not like you would understand. I mean, you're just a diary, you're not even real.
Do diaries have problems? Because, you know I don't wanna start writing in you if you can't relate to what I'm saying and get the groove I'm laying down catch the wave I'm riding sail the seas I'm seeing ride the magic carpet I'm riding eat the donut I'm eating stroke the -
You know what I mean?
Maybe I'll explain it to you in a way that you can understand…
Let's just say that a certain majestic sea creature named Dug (not me, the other sea manatee named Dug…of course, heh heh, yes…)…how about we call him "Diary".
Catch my drift?
Okay so "diary" has this really big crush on this other diary, and her name is… "Girl Diary"…no wait, that's too long…
Girl Diary
Girlary
Digirlary
Girlary
Diagirlarieah
Diarrhoea
Yes, okay so we'll go with "Diarrhoea".
So yes, so "Diary" has this huge crush on "Diarrhoea", and really wants to take her out. You know, somewhere nice where all the other Diaries take their Diarrhoea. Some place nice, that Diarrhoea wouldn't be ashamed to be seen in (she's a very good looking Diarrhoea, this one).
So Diary today thought to himself that he could take her somewhere upscale, somewhere like that new fancy restaurant with the golden arches. McSpermies' or whatever.
Because Diary thought that maybe Diarrhoea would let Diary have some fun together. Diary really thought that if he could just get to talk to Diarrhoea, then maybe he could get her interested. Diary knew that if he got Diarrhoea nice and hot he could really get her going. Diary had heard from his other friends how good Diarrhoea was when heated. All hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Hot and sticky Diarrhoea.
Anyway.
Amidst all this excitement and diarrhoea, it appears as though I have just tripled myself. And whilst I would love to stay and chat, this mess will not clean itself.
Sigh.
Yours sincerely,
Your friendly neighbourhood sea cow.
...
A/N: And so the plot thickens.
Don't know what 'tripling' is? Enlighten yourself, but remove the brackets first:
http(:)/youtu(.)be/zmwMCuN3gWM
Thankyou, come again.
^^That's what she said.