Previously on "Under a Killing Moon":
Bella's 18th birthday turns into a Stephen King novel when her mother tells finally mentions that time Bella got bit by a vampire. And now there's James's vampire venom floating around in her already mutated DNA. The best part is, no one really knows what will happen once the venom hits the mutated Keeper cells. Bella pukes on the floor and passes out. Similar to that time when I tried to get the worm at the bottom of the bottle...
She spends several hours in a feverish delirium, the two supernatural elements that have begun to mean so much to here warring with who gets to be the dominant gene. She overhears Edward saying a lot nice things, but he's not around when she wakes up. Cue dramatic exit.

Edward and Bella kiss. And kiss some more. He's his usual introspective, broody self. Charlie blames Renee, thank god, because you can't shoot Edward Cullen with your rifle. He gets called out to handle some more animal attacks...which is code for vampire leftovers. Charlie doesn't know that though. (Does he ever?) Bella explains that she's better than a human with super speed, strength and healing...but not quite as good as a vampire.

Disclaimer: Twilight and the characters protrayed are fictional. No real copyright infringement is intended. Also, even though Robert Frost and Jim Morrison are both dead...I don't mean to rip them off either.

Chapter 12

BPOV

Edward stared into my eyes and told me he wanted me. He said he loved me. I reached up to my face with the intention of wrapping my hands around his. There was a sharp knock and for a second, I panicked. What if it was James?

Or worse? Renee.

I didn't have a chance to pry myself off the couch to answer the door when it opened.

My butt did, in fact, leave the couch when I jumped. It scared the complete shit out of me. I was exhausted just thinking about the confrontation with James and the Volturi. What I did not need was an early surprise visit.

My neck nearly snapped when I turned my head to see the intruder.

Jasper. Fucking Jasper. And it wasn't just regular scared looking Jasper from school. That blond motherfucker had a grin that went from ear to ear. He focused this breathtaking smile at me first, then at Edward. I briefly wondered why he never looked so happy, until I remembered that I hated him for barging into my house.

"Look, I know you don't need an invitation to enter, but it is polite." My eyes narrowed and his smile quickly shrank into a smirk.

"Sorry, darlin'. I got a little excited." He hung his head slightly and I heard a high pitched giggle from behind him.

Alice nudged Jasper out of the way and exchanged a few looks with a very irritated looking Edward. Her bottom lip began to stick out slightly and she crossed her arms over her chest, then turned to look at me and smiled. I was never going to get used to that X-Files shit.

"What's the plan, then," I sighed, as I turned away from Edward and sank back into the couch. His hand lightly brushed my leg before resting a frustrating fraction of an inch away from me.

"Alice can't see any of it." Jasper shrugged and I felt Edward stiffen slightly.

"Then why are you so damn excited?"

"He likes the battle," Edward replied dryly.

"So you mean to tell me that I am sitting in a room with three super-gifted vampires and we don't have a plan to save my mutant ass?" I raked my hand through my hair and yanked on the ends.

"Alice can still see the nomads," Edward answered.

"Does Alice have a voice of her own?" I blurted.

"I do," she sighed. "I'm just frustrated. My visions have never been this difficult to see before."

"But we know the nomads won't be here until nightfall. We should have a decent plan of attack by then," Jasper added.

"The Volturi are coming," Alice breathed.

I felt Edward tense next to me and I gripped his hand. Suddenly, the prospect of coming face to face with Aro was more frightening than usual. Maybe it was the fact that my mother promised me to him. Then it dawned on me. Jane's nasty behavior, Aro's fatherly attitude and the forced friendliness of the rest of the guard all made sense. I should have noticed it sooner.

"Bella?" Alice's face was marked with worry.

"Sorry. Do you guys want to take this to the kitchen? We can turn it into a game of Stratego. I'll be the flag," I sighed.

"Alright, but only if I get to be the marshal," Jasper shouted behind me.

"Alice can be the spy," I replied as we sat around the kitchen table.

"Bella, your life is more than a board game metaphor," he pinched the bridge of his nose as he glared across the table at Jasper.

I wasn't sure if I found his sensitivity endearing or insulting. Had I not spent more than half my life training to face off with vampires? Did I not have a relationship with the leader of the Volturi? My own mother made a deal with that devil. A sense of humor is the only thing that will keep me from having another emotional breakdown in the shower.

I let out an indignant snort in Edward's general direction. His golden eyes narrowed at me, but before he had a chance to further placate me, Jasper chimed in.

"How vulnerable are you?" Jasper turned his head away from Edward and focused on me.

"I'm not sure. I'll have more raw power, but I'm not a strong fighter. Don't get me wrong, there's a dragon inside me begging to be unleashed. I'm just more of an offensive player."

"There are three nomads. From what I can see, only one is present during the fight. I've gotten several versions of the same fight, and it's only been him. I'm assuming its James," Alice's small, worldly voice offered.

I tuned out as they got into the logistics of it. It turned into a carefully orchestrated number. Using Alice's limited visions, Jasper put together a battle ballet. Edward was vehemently opposed to me being out in the woods fighting for my life, and would object to any situation Jasper created that left me in danger. Alice would yell at both of them when they began to get carried away with their arguments. Several times I was jolted into paying attention by strong vampire fists hitting the Formica table-top. I rested my head on my chin and pretended I was listening while they pretended I wasn't there.

My mind began to drift to Edward. Kissing Edward. My face grew hot as I vaguely remembered wrapping my legs around his waist. I had kissed Edward Cullen. I had kissed a vampire. I stole a glance at a seriously fuming Edward, defending my so-called honor. For a minute, I thought I understood a fraction of Renee's stupidity. As he raked his hands through his messy reddish hair and huffed a string of outdated profanities, I could see myself endangering my own life to be with him.

My own life. Not the life of my eight year-old daughter. Or the lives of the people who were like family.

The drain of last night's birthday coma started to hit me and I rested my head on top of my folded arms on the table. Jasper's irritated southern drawl lulled me into haze, but Edward's desperate velvety baritone was like a lullaby.

"I see you've brought some company." Aro looked like the wind could blow him away at any moment.

Looks can be deceiving.

"I d-did. You kn-know Carlisle," I stammered, hoping to god he couldn't see through me. I tried to keep my thoughts as muted as possible.

A small fire was burning under the cover of a dense patch of trees. Growling was rumbling close by—I couldn't tell if it was vampire or otherwise. Aro only chuckled as I turned my head to listen and clutched the left side of my neck.

"James was a rather good fighter, it was almost a shame to exterminate him," he sighed listlessly.

"Aro, I came here to try and reason with you." Carlisle's cold hand on my shoulder almost seemed warm in comparison to the freezing rain that was stabbing at my entire body.

"Since you have always been a good friend, I am prepared to hear you out." Aro's mouth moved into a small smile. Maybe it was supposed to reassure me, but suddenly I felt nauseous.

The nausea could have been a side effect from the nearly-immobilizing pain shooting through my entire body. My knees buckled as shocks of searing, white-hot ache networked through me.

"It's not like you to seal a fate." Carlisle's words sent my heart down to my stomach.

"I think you give me too much credit, friend," the ancient vampire chuckled, "some of the best of the guard have been recruited during their human lives." Jane and her brother had been. I remembered that much.

I sucked in several gulps of air before I could speak. "I'm prepared to fight for my life," my voice was strangled.

"You will lose it in the process." The light tone of condescension was replaced with an angry caveat.

I shook myself awake and was greeted with three pairs of wide eyes.

"Did I say something embarrassing?" I mumbled.

"You…I…you," Edward's mouth closed as he looked to Alice for assistance.

Oh for fuck's sake. I ran my hands through my hair and across my face.

"He could hear your dream, Bella," Alice said.

"You were tense and afraid," Jasper added quietly.

"I was having a nightmare," I began defending myself. Edward's hand slipped on top of mine as he moved to the empty seat on my left.

"Bella, I could hear your mind. See the nightmare in your head."

I mimicked the expression of the other three. What the hell? I made a brief, panicked inventory of what I was dreaming of, just in case it was embarrassing. Same old rainy nightmares, thank god.

"What else would you be dreaming of?" Edward questioned, apparently still able to hear my mind. A blush crept up my cheeks and Jasper chuckled from the other side of the table.

"Well, Eddie, I can tell you that it would be embarrassing."

I rested my forehead in my free hand and willed whatever kind of fuckery was rampant to disappear. How are they even getting in? Edward's hand tightened around mine and I looked up to see a confused expression on his handsome face. Oh god, I hope he can't hear me.

His eyes shot to the other side of me and I followed his gaze. Alice was staring ahead with a blank expression in her eyes and a trace of worry around her mouth. My head was reeling with the latest installment of Freudian dream nonsense and the knowledge that Edward could hear my thoughts. Or, at least he could while I was asleep…

"I get it!" I jumped up in my chair and both men stared at me with their glowing golden eyes.

"Why you could hear my thoughts," I pointed to Edward, "and why you could pick up on my emotions," my index finger fell on Jasper. "And probably why she's sitting over there trying to sort out a mess of crazy visions." A smug smile tugged at my mouth and I sat up straight in my chair to give myself a proverbial pat on the back. I am so smart, I am so smart.

"Are you gonna share with the rest of the class, Miss Swan." Jasper's earlier look of amusement seemed to drain from his face.

"I was asleep! I let my shield down because I was asleep!" I mentally fist-pumped my intelligence, but Edward was giving me a worried look.

"What if we're not the only ones who can reap the benefits of that revelation?"

A sudden gasp from Alice prevented Edward from further pissing on my parade.

"Your dream and my visions," she breathed heavily, "they're lining up."

Jasper peered at me curiously. I shifted uneasily in my chair as all three vampires stared at me like I was the bearded lady at the circus. Immortal, blood-sucking creatures of the night, for Christ sake! How am I the freak at this table! My face frowned sharply and Edward's thumb brushed the corners of my mouth.

"So tell us about your dream," Jasper sighed.

"I get my ass kicked." I shrugged. "Someone comes to my rescue, but I never see him. Violence ensues. The Volturi show up. Carlisle tries to talk some sense into Aro. My ribs are probably pretty close to broken because it hurts so bad I want to hurl. I'm sensing this dream isn't going to pan out so well for me." I stared at the table top, not wanting to show any weakness on my face.

"We're your back-up. And I don't go down without a fight," Jasper gloated.

"I appreciate it, but I need to do this alone. There's no way I'm dragging you three into the lion's den. You don't even know me!" I whipped my hand out from under Edward's and stood up. Maybe I was getting too wrapped up in the unconditional support of Edward's family. It could have been the kiss from earlier that warped my little independent brain. In any case, there was no way I could let those three journey out on a suicide mission for me. It was selfish, and I don't do selfish. My palms flattened against the fake wood and I glanced at Edward.

I really wish I could do selfish, because I didn't want to give him up. His shoulders were already tensed from my tirade, and I knew he was coming up with an angry rant to get me to change my mind.

"I know your ma kinda left you out to dry, but that's not what family does." It was Jasper that that spoke first.

"I'm not going to let you guys stick your necks out for me." I could feel the tears welling, and I hoped I was only so emotional these last few days because I was tired.

"I saw you for a reason, Bella. We saved you because from the moment that vision came, I knew you were special. You're important to Edward, Bella. You're important to me." The intense stare accompanying Alice's was haunting.

I sat back down next to Edward and rested my head in my arms.

"You always have a choice," his rich voice was low in my ear, but I knew Alice and Jasper could hear.

My roads were diverging and it sucked. Maybe Renee is the worst mother ever. I could dye my hair blonde, wear a white t-shirt and rap about the ways Renee failed as a mother and get a couple platinum records. Hell, I could have Kristen Stewart play me in a Lifetime movie about how my Renee ruined my life. But she was still my mother. Wasn't it in my DNA to follow in her footsteps?

"It's your turn to try, Bella. But I can't be your guide. It has to be your decision." Edward sat back and I immediately felt his absence.

Jasper's and Alice's hands were intertwined, their eyes fixed to their laced up fingers.

Being a Volturi member was never on the top of my "what I want to be when I grow up" list. I thought, maybe I'd go rogue and head off to college. Or become a vampire and have infinite chances to make my un-life mean something—find the cure for AIDS or solve the economic crisis. Whatever I did, I was going to choose to do it. Or so I thought.

Not only was I born with X-Men genes, but my mother used me as a bargaining chip with the Volturi.

Since when was I ever going to be able to make up my own mind? I can say, with confidence, it won't be in Volterra. Edward was right. I needed to make my own choice. I had to look that fork in the road in the…uh…fork….and tell it to fork off! Or, more appropriately, pick a path.

Okay, so maybe I thought about Edward's tongue inside my mouth more than was rational while I made my decision. But, I also took into consideration the way Jasper yelled at me for thinking I was in this alone. Alice thought I was special, and not in the freak chromosome way. And Edward? Hasn't he been saving me from skidding vans, douche bags in low-riders and my mother? My choice seemed obvious.

"Okay, but can we please stop choreographing this like a Backstreet Boys video?" I sighed.

I'm pretty sure Alice squealed in delight.

"And you can't keep me out of it." I turned to Edward. "Don't fight for me, fight with me."

"Fine." I could hear the exasperation in his voice.

Jasper and Edward bickered about the best way not to get me killed. I started thinking about Jacob Black. That shape shifting son of a bitch and his vamp hating cronies might be just the edge we needed. Of course James and the Volturi would be expecting me, since I am the fricken birthday guest of honor. My location will probably lead Aro to expect some degree of Cullen involvement. What no one will expect? Werewolves in Washington.

I am so smart!

"What's going on?" Alice cocked her eyebrow at me.

"I…uh…have to take care of some unfinished business with Renee. But, I need to make a quick stop." Try to think of a good excuse why Edward can't go with you. Try to think of a good excuse why Edward can't go with you…

"I'll come with you." Edward knows his script.

"Look, I have a plan. But, I need to work it out." I decided the truth would be best. Because, you can't base a relationship on lies. Sins of the…uh…mother? I think not. "I need to go see a couple of guys on the res."

"You can't go out there by yourself," Edward said through clenched teeth.

"Well you can't go out there at all," I snapped. All three vampires recoiled slightly. "Trust me, you guys. I might be a couple decades younger than you, but I am trained for this kinda thing." Right?

"I trust her." Jasper shrugged.

I felt Edward's arms around my waist and his cold lips enveloped mine. I'm sure I heard fireworks and a hallelujah chorus. A strong hand slipped to my lower back and pushed me closer to his mouth. There were quick, soothing jolts of ecstasy pulsing through my entire body. Everything slipped away and we were alone. But I wasn't alone. I was with Edward.

The pressure of his lips on mine lightened and I was back in the Swan kitchen, staring into his topaz eyes and trying to tell myself that my plan would work. He chuckled when my cheeks started to burn.

"I'll see you soon," I whispered.

"Try not to get yourself mauled. You reek like vampire." Edward smiled wide and my heart swelled. I didn't even care that he marked his territory and the wolf-boys were going to be more difficult. There was a pretty good chance I loved that moody guy like the Justice League loved Batman.

Alice flung herself at me before they headed out the door, whispering "be safe" and telling me that everything is going to be okay. I believed her.

I was going to make it okay.

Thanks to the usual suspects...Cap, bite me, marina (do like how I am so lazy I can't even type your full handle? I suck) holidae...and everyone else who's reviewed the last two chapters and didn't hear anything from me. Welcome to all the new readers. Hello to all the UKM vets. A big, CEO hug to my beta wonkeygirl...who hasn't beta'd anything you've read yet...but she's awesome. And she's making me do NaNoWriMo with her, so I may go MIA. (just for the month of November, PROMISE). And a shout to my other PTB Beta, mysmileismytears...because pretty soon I'm going to finish Chapter 4 fail and then we'll really get this train moving.
*The fork in the road and diverging path references are from "The Road Not Taken." www[dot]bartleby[dot]com/119/1[dot]html
*It's your turn to try/I can't be your guide is a poorly done rip from "Moonlight Drive." www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=D9Q6gw478bw

A/N: I'm going to try my damnedest to get at least the remaining chapters finished by the end of the year. I am, however, still working on revisions. Those might take a little bit longer. Also, upon revision...Bella has already had a pissing match with Jacob over who is going to dominiate in a vamp v. wolf mortal kombat. But, I haven't gotten that much beta'd yet, so it's not here. IF you'd like to see it. Let me know. Because I've been editing the chapter before that for 2+ months now. (No, really). And, I won't include the meeting with Jacob here...because I treat him unfairly and I know this. But, if anyone really wants to see them have a 'whose dick is bigger' contest, I can one-shot that shit. There is still a thread at Twilighted, there's a link on my profile for that if you're interested.

Notice how head and end notes are almost as long as my update? Does that make me cooler? Probably not. Do you know what DOES make me cooler? Having read Feisty Y. Beden's story "Sleepers, Awake: Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme." "Son of Preacher Man" may also be responsible for some of my write-lag.

Thanks for reading. Okay. This update is officially over.