Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters, just the crazy doctors listed in the fic.
"Okay, Yusuke," the therapist said. "I want you to tell me what parts of the story you wrote?"
"What story?" Yusuke asked sarcastically. "And what does it matter which parts I wrote?"
"Because it will help us determine the underlying reason for your problem," she explained.
"Look lady," Yusuke said bitterly, "I didn't write a story and I don't have a problem."
The therapist put a hand to her chin. "Hm, this is worse than I thought. You can't even acknowledge that you have a problem. Okay, let's start over. Yusuke, my name is Dr. Sani and I have a master's degree in psychology."
"That means absolutely nothing to me," Yusuke stated. Dr. Sani looked like she had been shot.
"Well, Yusuke, your file says that you're an only child to a single mother," she said looking at her charts. "It must have been hard for you to grow up without a father."
Oh God, Yusuke thought. He watched enough TV shows to know how this was going to go.
"If you're going to ask the 'how did you feel about that' bullshit, then I'm walking out of here right now," Yusuke replied.
Dr. Sani started writing some stuff down in her chat. She said it as she wrote it. "Reluctant to talk about his feelings, easily angered, suggest family counseling."
Yusuke's vein started popping out. "How the hell am I supposed to go to family counseling while I'm in this place?" he asked at about talking volume.
Dr. Sani wrote more down before snapping back at Yusuke, "Now, young man, I will not tolerate your behavior. Either you calm down or I'm going to have your ward keep you in your room for the rest of the evening."
"But I wasn't even yelling," he muttered.
"That's it! You're going to sit in your room and when you're ready to let me help you, you will be let out."
This is such a load of-
"Mr. Kuwabara," an elderly man called into the common room. "My name is Dr. Takaneshi and I will be your therapist during your stay here."
"Um, okay then." The two walked into a room that looked like an interrogation room in cop TV shows.
"Um, Dr. Takaneshi? Why is it so dark in here?"
"SIT DOWN!" Dr. Takaneshi roared.
"Uh, okay," Kuwabara said as he rushed to sit down. Once he got into the chair, he was strapped in.
What the-?
"Now, Mr. Kuwabara," Dr. Takaneshi cut into his thoughts, "I am going to ask you a series of questions and you are to answer them truthfully or else you will receive a shock."
"Are you frigging crazy?" Kuwabara yelled.
"No, you are," Dr. Takaneshi stated calmly. Kuwabara rolled his eyes, but the doctor couldn't tell because of the light shining in Kuwabara's eyes. "First question: is your name Kuwabara?"
"Um, yes?"
Shock!
"What the hell?"
"That was a lie," Dr. Takaneshi said as if it was a known fact. "Your name is Kazuma."
"But I-"
"Next question: Do you live in Tokyo, Japan?"
"What does that have to-?"
"Answer the question!"
"Jeez, okay. Yes."
Shock!
"What now?"
"It was never specified what city you lived in."
"OH, GIVE ME A BREAK!"
"Hey, Kuwabara," Kurama said. "Are you alright? Your session went on for three hours."
Kuwabara wobbled into the common room and muttered a bunch of intelligible garbage.
"My name is Kazuma; it was never specified what city I live in; I don't like cats, I love them; I'm a normal, human boy; I didn't fight in any tournaments…" The list went on and on.
"Kuwabara?" Kurama tried again.
Kuwabara tried to sit down and fell head first onto the floor and groaned.
"What the hell happened to him?" Shizuru asked.
"I have no idea," Kurama stated. "But I think something happened during his session."
"No shit, Sherlock," Shizuru teased.
"Where is Yusuke?" Kurama asked.
"Keiko said he was locked in his room and isn't allowed visitors until he's willing to discuss his feelings with his therapist."
"Oh."
There were a few minutes of silence before screams were heard and flames were seen.
"Oh boy," Shizuru whispered. "I wonder what pissed flame boy off."
Hiei came running out of the room and Kurama grabbed his arm before he got away.
"Hiei, what happened?" he asked.
"Get me to your room and I'll tell you," Hiei responded. He sounded desperate so Kurama agreed.
Shizuru watched the therapists as they searched the common room holding a straightjacket.
"Well, that explains that."