Chapter Twenty Four

There is something that I see
In the way you look at me
There's a smile, there's a truth in your eyes
But an unexpected way
On this unexpected day
Could it mean this is where I belong
It is you I have loved all along
It's no more mystery
It is finally clear to me
You're the home my heart searched for so long
And it is you I have loved all along

~ It Is You (I Have Loved) by Dana Glover ~

I had fire and ice in my veins. Every spark of fire that scored my flesh was doused with an icicle that sent splinters of frost spiking through my body. It was constant and I screamed and screamed.

I screamed for Charlie, who had been bitten. What had happened to him? Was he safe? Had Carlisle saved him?

I screamed for Carlisle, begging him to make the pain stop. Had he done anything to help me? Could he? Why wasn't the pain stopping?

I screamed for Jacob. Had he come? I thought I'd heard a wolf howling when I was in the gym.

… I screamed for Edward. I screamed for him to help me, to hold me, to let me know that I was OK.

How long had I been unconscious? Was I unconscious?

… Was I dead?

I mean, more dead than I already was. Actually, was that possible? How much more dead could a person get?

Oh my god – was this it? After all this time as a ghost, was I… finished?

No, it couldn't be. I mean, there had to be something else. Why would I be in so much pain if I was done?

I had too much to do – I had to see if Jake finished the Rabbit. I still had to finish The Return of the King (freakin' Tolkien!) and I'd been meaning to catch up on some daytime TV. I had to beat Emmett at that zombie game without Edward's help.

Edward…

I had to see Edward. I had to tell him that I loved him. That was what was meant to happen, right? Alice had seen it. She'd seen it. She'd seen me fall in love with Edward.

I was in love with Edward.

I loved Edward.

Oh god, and I never even told him.

I never…

…

…

…

…

…Oh, hell no.

I hadn't stuck around as a ghost for a decade just to quit when everything started getting better. Not when I had friends and family and a really gorgeous, sensitive, smoking hot vampire who wanted me in a really good way!

To hell with this 'go to the light' crap.

I was going back.

I couldn't hear anyone nearby and I hadn't opened my eyes. Because it freakin' hurt.

I mean, seriously, it was like someone had decided to just kick the crap out of me, just for the fun of it.

Oh yeah. They did. God, I hoped Edward kicked James' ass.

In fact, the only part of me that didn't hurt was my right hand. It actually felt kind of nice, really cool and something was stroking it gently. I liked that.

It felt like Edward. And that in itself was a reason to open my eyes.

I tried just the one at first, positive that if I could just see him that I would feel better and that would be that, I'd be back to my pain-proof ghost self. That one lid felt like it weighed ten tons and I think I may have strained half the muscles in my face trying to open it.

But it was worth it, because there he was and as I focused on him, his eyes met mine. His face was frozen for a moment and then he lifted my hand, pressing his mouth to it. I closed my eye again and attempted opening both.

Well, that wasn't too bad. And I was rewarded by Edward's smile, his spare hand stroking my cheek. I smiled faintly.

"Hi."

"Bella…" He moved, sitting on the edge of the bed and I used my spare hand to rub my eyes.

"I feel like hell."

"Not surprising." He murmured and I took a deep breath before leaning on my elbow, trying to sit up. Immediately Edward's hands went to my waist, steadying me and I slid my arms around his neck and burying my face in his shoulder. The smell of him was so comforting and I breathed him in, feeling the warmth and strength of him surround me. His hand wound its way into my hair, holding me close and I swallowed hard before pulling back to look up at him.

"Where's Charlie?"

"At the hospital." He whispered, resting his forehead against mine.

"He's OK?"

"He will be. He's still sleeping."

I closed my eyes again, running my hands up his arms onto his shoulders before looking at him again.

"What happened? I got bitten… what happened?"

"They're all dead. I killed James. Emmett and Jasper took care of Laurent and the wolves got Victoria. Carlisle sucked the venom from Charlie and saved him."

I was silent, thinking about that. About how Charlie had been able to see me. Edward's hand brushed my cheek and I saw that his expression was perplexed. I tilted my head, my fingers stroking against his neck, tingles of electricity across my skin.

"What's wrong?"

"Bella… I couldn't help you. The venom got into your system." He bowed his head so that it rested against my shoulder and I put my arms around him again, cradling him against me.

"Edward-"

"Bella, you've changed."

Changed?

I pulled back slightly, looking at him in confusion. His brow was furrowed and I looked down at my hands and arms. Did I look different? I didn't feel different.

Although, I didn't feel bad. In fact, I felt kind of good. Healthy. And energetic, like I could run a mile in a minute and jump a ravine whilst I was at it. And looking around the room, things seemed clearer too, like I'd switched over to HD.

Edward was smiling slightly, probably at my bemused expression. I shrugged shyly.

"Do I look different?"

"You look beautiful. So no."

I ducked my head and he laughed softly.

"You smell different. It isn't as strong as it used to be. And you… it's very subtle, but you look more like us. Paler, but not as pale."

"You've changed but not as much as you would have if you had been alive." Carlisle's voice came from the door and we turned, untwining our arms from each other. The Doc smiled, walking towards me

"So, I'm a vampire now?" I asked uncertainly and he sighed.

"I don't know. I don't know what you are, Bella, there has never been anything like you." He stopped by the edge of the bed and I swung my legs over so that I could stand beside him. Moving to the nearest wall, I pressed my palm against it and pushed. It slid through easily, with the same pain as I had always experienced. I pulled back, flexing my fingers and looked back at Edward and Carlisle.

"Well, that's handy."

"Try your strength." Edward suggested, throwing me metal plate from their needlessly supplied kitchen. I caught it easily but as soon as I gripped it, there was a groaning sound and the metal creased beneath my fingers. I lessened my grip and examined the dents. Nowhere near as bad as it would have been if Edward had caught it, his strength would have torn through it like foil. With a little effort, I bent back the edge of the plate easily.

Semi-super strength. Nice.

I took a deep breath and tossed the plate back to Edward. He caught it gently and placed it on the bed before looking at Carlisle sharply. It was then that I noticed the flask he was carrying. He looked at me apologetically.

"Blood… just in case." He twisted the lid off and held the flask towards me. I approached him slowly, sniffing. I could smell it, rusty and salty. Not appealing at all. I took the flask and took a deep breath, then gagged, screwing the lid back on.

"Geez, that's disgusting."

"You don't want it? Are you hungry for anything else?" Carlisle asked and I shook my head. I hadn't been hungry in a decade and that hadn't changed.

"To be honest, I feel pretty much the same. Kind of… tuned in. Everything is clearer, sights and smells and sounds."

Carlisle smiled warmly.

"It sounds like you're a hybrid."

"I'm environmentally friendly?" He laughed at that and Edward smiled.

"You've combined the key aspects of being a ghost and a vampire. It's likely that you're the only one to ever have done this." Carlisle held out his hand and I crossed over to him. He tilted my head, examining my eyes.

"Your eyes are lighter… they may change completely to the same colour as ours. As I said, your skin is definitely paler, but without the reflective properties."

"No sparkling?"

"No sparkling." Carlisle laughed softly, "Your features aren't dramatically changed, as they would have been if you'd been turned from a live human. But they're… refined."

In other words – I was almost vampire-hot now. I could live (or not) with that.

I ran a hand through my hair, looking from Carlisle to Edward. After my initial curiosity about my own state of being, my mind had already turned to other things.

"Can I go see Charlie?"

Carlisle drove Edward and me to the hospital. I didn't see the others as they were hunting and I was too desperate to see Charlie. There would be time to see them later. Edward and I sat in the back seat, our hands joined between us. No pretence, no time wasting. We'd come too close to loss to take our time with this and we had silently agreed.

"He was unconscious for about twenty hours. He came around late this morning. His deputy interviewed him, he said that he didn't remember too much but he was taken hostage by an armed man. There's a warrant out for James." Carlisle said as we pulled into the parking lot, "Not that it'll turn anything up. Edward, I'd like you to see if he does truly remember anything."

I walked with them in silence to Charlie's room but stopped before we reached the door. Edward felt the tug on our hands and turned to look at me. I tore my gaze from the door to his face and he knew immediately.

"I don't think he'll be able to see you, Bella."

"What if he can?" My voice sounded so small and Edward rubbed his thumb over my knuckles.

"Then we will do something to help him." He said softly.

I took a deep breath, nodding. Edward brought my hand up to his mouth, kissing it swiftly before releasing it and following Carlisle into the room.

Charlie was sitting up in bed, eyes on the silenced television in the corner of the room. But as we entered, he turned it off and looked our way. His eyes went from Carlisle to Edward… back to Carlisle.

He couldn't see me.

Relief and disappointment filled me and I felt Edward's fingers brush against mine.

"Good afternoon, Chief Swan."

"Doc." He nodded amiably, but I saw the slight narrowing of his eyes and the slight angling of Edward's head.

"How are you feeling?" Carlisle asked and Charlie shrugged.

"Can't complain."

"How's the pain control?" He asked, examining Charlie's chart before smiling at him, "I hope you don't mind Edward being here. He was jogging last night when he saw something going on at the High School. It was fortunate that those young men from the reservation were passing, I don't think Edward would have been able to get help in time."

Charlie was silent, looking from one of them to the other. Edward smiled briefly.

"I'm glad you're alright, sir."

"You just passed by the gym, Edward?" Charlie asked him sharply and Edward nodded, "And where were you, Doctor Cullen?"

"At home with Esme, a rare night off for me." Carlisle replied breezily.

I moved closer to the bed as he spoke, resting my hand close to his. He shifted and his fingers brushed against mine and he pulled his hand away sharply, the ice cold shocking him. I flinched, drawing my hand back.

All three of them were silent for a moment before Carlisle looked at Edward briefly.

"Well, we'll let you get your rest, Chief. Don't hesitate to call if you need anything."

"Hmm." Charlie grunted, not his usual friendly self at all. Edward's eyes flashed to mine before he turned and left with Carlisle. I looked at Charlie and saw him staring at the Cullens with a calculating expression.

"He's suspicious." Edward said as Carlisle closed his office door, "He's planning to do an investigation on the sly. He remembers far more than he admitted to." Once again, his eyes met mine and my heart quaked in my chest.

"Does he…?"

"He remembers seeing you. He thinks it was a hallucination. He's less convinced about us… he knows that we're lying, but he doesn't know how much he trusts his own memory." Edward said musingly.

I sank into one of the office chairs, feeling numb. Edward's hand went to my shoulder, his fingers rubbing my skin soothingly. Carlisle was watching Edward pensively.

"What is he going to do?"

"Look into our pasts. He won't find much, but there's always the possibility that he could draw unwanted attention to himself." Edward said softly, as though not wishing to alarm me. But I knew what he was referring to.

"The Volturi?"

"… It's a possibility." But the way he said it confirmed my fears. Charlie was not safe.

I looked down at my hands. Here it was. The biggest decision I would ever make.

"Edward, can we go home? I need to talk to you."

We bypassed all of the other Cullens. I felt bad that I hadn't said anything to them yet, but I needed to do this before I lost my nerve. Instead I took Edward by the hand and led him upstairs, my nerves tingling at our unhindered contact.

Edward released my hand, turning to close the door behind – it gave the illusion of privacy, even though I knew that the others could hear everything that I was about to say. Edward stayed by the door, his eyes fixed on mine and I tore my gaze away, nervous at what was about to come. I reached for the stereo remote to give my hands something to do and soothing classical music filled the air, breaking the tension a little.

Edward was smiling slightly and I couldn't help me own faint grin, but I bit my lip as he moved towards me. I dropped the remote onto a table, looking up at him as he came close and reached out my hand for his, our fingers twining. He lifted his free hand and brushed my dark hair from my shoulder, sparks flying across my skin at his touch and I released a soft sigh.

His eyes were soft as they met mine again before darting down to my lips. And then he lowered his face to mine, brushing his mouth against mine, the hand that had been in mine curling against the back of my neck. I wrapped my free arm around his neck, reaching up on tiptoe to be closer as finally, finally we kissed, finally showed each other what we had both known for so very long.

He kissed me slowly then pulled back, resting his forehead against mine as his fingers stroked the nape of my neck. I closed my eyes again, breathing in his scent as my mouth stung with the loss of contact with him. After I felt less uncertain, less shaky, I pulled back and looked up at him, brushing a stray lock of hair out of his eyes.

"I love you, Edward." I said softly, although it was obvious, so obvious that I almost didn't need to say it. But I did, because I knew how happy it would make him. "I love you."

"I love you too." The words seared through my heart and I smiled as he moved to kiss me again, his hands cupping my face as I put my arms around his neck. His mouth was so gentle against mine, kissing at a leisurely pace, no hurry at all…

I pressed my forehead to his cheek, loving the feel of his skin against mine, the way he held me so easily. I felt protected and adored in his arms. And I hated what I was about to do.

"I love you, Edward." I said again, tightening my hold on him and I felt him smile.

"I love you, Bella." He murmured and I closed my eyes, hoping that he would understand.

"…But you need to leave." I whispered.

A/N: I know, horrible cliffie… in other news, there is only one more chapter then an epilogue to go. You know what would be super? If we could get to 1000 reviews by the end of this story!

It may be a little while to the next chapter, but you never know… I may surprise you!

It is You (I Have Loved) – Such a sappy song, but I love it, and I wanted to use it just for the ling "You're the home my heart searched for so long", to show how Edward and Bella feel now that they've accepted each other.

Reviewers will receive their chosen Cullen/Werewolf and a night in Edward's bedroom.

Love

Katie