A Full Rich Life

Chapter Six: Time to Say Goodbye.

Helen slowly opened her eyes, feeling as weak as a newborn kitten. She was vaguely aware that something cool and wet was draped across her forehead, and that her body felt as though it was covered in a sheen of icy sweat. She blinked against the harsh lights of the room she was in, and gradually what she had taken to be blurred shapes solidified into a very relieved looking Alannah.

"Welcome back."

Helen blinked, and then spoke, the weak and raspy sound of her voice startling her. "Where'd I go?" The room came more and more into focus, and she realized she was in a private room off the Infirmary. "Last I remember, I was toasting the married couples…"

Alannah mopped her forehead with the cold cloth. "You collapsed half way through the toast. I tried reviving you, but you were well out of it. Tarrant and Thomas carried you here. Alice and I had to stay behind and explain what was happening."

Katarina watched in horror as Thomas and Tarrant carried Helen off to the Infirmary. Five minutes ago, everything had been going wonderfully. The Reception for her and Vicki was going smoothly, and everyone was having, as Helen would say, a grand old time. Helen had been coughing, but she was able to muffle it with a handkerchief without much trouble. Then she had stood to give a toast to the happy couples. "I would like to… (a spasm of coughing) say that… (another, longer spasm and Katarina noticed her mother looking at Helen with deep worry on her face) I am so glad to…" Helen gave a strangled breath and collapsed, her glass falling from her suddenly nerveless hands to shatter on the floor.

Alannah leapt up from the table and knelt beside Helen, lifting her wrist and feeling for a pulse. She found one, but it was weak and thready. "Ilosovic, go into my Potions Cupboard and bring me the bottle of Revival." Ilosovic ran into the kitchen and came back with the bottle, and Alannah gently opened Helen's mouth and poured a measure of the potion down her throat. There was no response, and Alannah passed her hand before her eyes. "Someone needs to get her to the Infirmary; I can treat her better there."

Thomas stepped forward. "Tarrant and I will take her."

Alannah nodded. "Good, be careful with her. Tell the assistant on duty to put her in the private wing and wait for me. In the meantime, keep her cool."

Tarrant gently picked Helen up and he and Thomas exited the cottage. Alice and Margaret looked over at Alannah, terror and grief on their faces. Alannah gulped, and then looked over at her daughters, who had looks of anger and disbelief on their faces. Katarina spoke first. "When were you planning on telling us Gran was sick? ! How could you let us go through with the weddings knowing how sick she was? ! Why didn't you tell us? !"

Josiah spoke up, his eyes red. "Why dinnae ye tell me? ! She's mah flesh an' blud, Aunt Alannah! I thought ye were a kine and benevolent 'ealer, no someone who keeps a secret li'e this from family! Ye…ye…soith!"

"JOSIAH!" Alice's eyes were wide with disbelief and anger. She stepped forward, glaring at her son in fury. "You have no right to speak to her in that manner!"

"Yes he does." Alannah's voice was calm, but her eyes glistened with tears. She looked around at her children. "You all have the right to be furious with me. I should have told you."

Vicki spoke up, her voice calm. "Then why didn't you?"

"Because Helen forbade me to. She wanted to see you two married more than anything, and if we had postponed, then she would have died before a wedding could take place." Alannah gave her eldest a sad smile. "I thought the three of you would figure it out on your own, being my children."

Arianna looked over at her. "How sick is she?"

Alice gulped. "Sweetie, she's going to die soon." Arianna wailed and buried her face in Michael's chest. He stroked her back, looking over at his mother.

"Is that true?" Alannah nodded, on the verge of tears herself, and Michael gulped. "What does she have?"

"Consumption. It's a very deadly Overland disease, and she's in the final stages." She took a breath, and looked at Josiah. "I will understand if you hate me for not telling you, but Helen wished it."

Josiah stared at her, his eyes blue with grief. "She's dyin?" Alannah nodded, and he continued, his voice shaky. "An'…what she wanted most was tae see me an' Vicki wed?" Another nod and he began sobbing. "Then…I'm glad she got tae see it. I'm sorry, Alannah." He walked over to his mother, and she pulled him into a tight embrace as he sobbed into her shoulder.

Alannah smiled at him. "I forgave you the moment you said it, Josiah." She turned to her husband. "Ilosovic, do what you can here. I need to get to the Infirmary."

"Of course."

Alannah left the cottage, and headed for the Infirmary, relieved to discover that her instructions had been carried out. 'There are advantages to being Head Physician.' She turned to her assistant, a plump girl of seventeen. "Has Mrs. Kingsley come round yet?"

"No ma'am, but I 'ave been doing like you asked an' keeping her cool."

"Thank you, Bridget. You can go get a bit of rest now, you look done in." Bridget gave her a grateful smile before lying down on one of the Infirmary beds. Alannah laughed quietly then went into the room where Helen lay sleeping.

Helen blinked. "I do remember feeling a cold cloth on me. How long have I been asleep?"

Alannah sighed. "You've been unconscious for three days. There were moments when I thought we'd lost you. Alice and Meggie have been coming in here every three hours asking how you are. At least now I can tell them you're awake."

Helen gave her a soft smile. "But I won't be for long. That's what you're trying to avoid telling me, right? That my time is up?"

"Helen, I…I was looking through my books, and I think I can make a potion that will arrest the affects of consumption indefinitely. I could…"

"No." Helen's voice was firm, and she glared at Alannah. "No, you couldn't. Isn't part of your Oath to do your best to alleviate suffering?"

"Yes, but…"

"And didn't you once tell me that you cannot reverse the effect of mortal diseases under any circumstances?"

"This is different, I'm sure that an exception could be made for you."

Helen gave a weak chuckle. "Why, because I am the mother of your Champion? I'm sorry, but that is a weak excuse and you know it. I am no more special than any mother, and I know Alice would not want me to live indefinitely with this. I have made my peace with Death, and am ready to greet him like an old friend. You have no right to try and postpone the meeting. I am ill, but I know my own mind."

Alannah smiled. "That you certainly do. Very well. You do not have long, Helen. Hours at most."

Helen gave a weak smile. "I know. Where are Alice and Meggie?"

Alannah mopped her forehead with the cloth, smiling. "They're right outside, waiting to hear if there's been any change in you. I was about to go tell them the news."

Helen smiled. "Good, I want to see them."

Alannah nodded, then stood and walked out of the room, staring in sympathy at the two women that sat on a low bench in front of the door, their hands clasped together and their heads bowed. Margaret was the first to spot Alannah. "Is she awake?"

Alannah nodded. "She is, but she doesn't have much time left. She wants to see you."

Alice blinked back her tears, and she and Margaret stood together and entered the room where their mother lay dying.

Helen smiled at them. "Hello my darlings, I'm so glad to see you."

Margaret smiled, tears flowing down her face. "Hell…hello…Muh…Muh…" the last bit of her restraint broke, and she collapsed beside Helen, sobbing her heart out. Alice came forward on shaky legs and collapsed as well, and Helen reached out and weakly hugged them.

"I could not be prouder of either of you if I lived to be a hundred. Alice, you were the reminder of Charles. He shone through in your eyes and in your insatiable curiosity and refusal to believe that nothing was impossible. Every time I saw you, I was reminded of him, and for that I will forever love you. You are my little Alice and a wonderful wife and mother. And Meggie, my darling Meggie. I watched, prayed and hoped that you would someday realize your full potential, and that you would escape from the stultifying life you had built around yourself and fly free. And now look at you. You are full of a life and vigor I never saw while you were married to Lowell. You smile more, and you laugh. You have a husband that adores you and a son that is the apple of your eye. You have made real friends, true friends instead of the social contacts you had in London. I love you both immensely."

Alice gulped. "We love you too, Mummy, and I don't want you to go! Why can't you stay for just a bit longer?"

Helen smiled. "Because I have kept your father waiting for me long enough." She looked at her daughters. "Will you both hold me for a while?" They clung to her, and she sighed. "Thank you. It's so beautiful here, don't you think? The…weddings…were…lovely. I…love you both…so…much."

A soft sigh escaped her lips, and Helen Kingsley shut her eyes and breathed her last.

Alice and Meggie stared at her for several moments, tears flowing unchecked down their faces. Alice leaned forward and kissed her cool forehead, speaking in a voice choked with tears. "Fairfarren, Momma. I hope you and Dad find each other in Heaven."

She and Meggie exited the room, and Tarrant took one look at the devastation and grief on Alice's face and held open his arms. She ran to him, clinging to him as her body shook with loud sobs. Thomas was holding his equally grieving wife, and Josiah and Arianna clung to their mother and father, sobbing. Even Ilosovic was crying softly-Helen had touched all their lives, and all felt the grief of her passing.

Alannah was crying when she felt her Song coming. Knowing that it would be useless to fight, she began to sing in a mournful dirge.

"When I am dead, my dearest,

Sing no sad songs for me;

Plant thou no roses at my head,

Nor shady cypress tree:

Be the green grass above me

With showers and dewdrops wet;

And if thou wilt, remember,

And if thou wilt, forget.

I shall not see the shadows,

I shall not feel the rain;

I shall not hear the nightingale

Sing on, as if in pain:

And dreaming through the twilight

That doth not rise nor set,

Haply I may remember,

And haply may forget."

Author's Note: I thought of putting the funeral in here, but decided instead that it will be in the last chapter.