Those of you who were thinking, "YES! KAGE NO HANA STILL HASN'T UPDATED! THAT MEANS SHE AND HER TERRIBLE FICS MUST BE DEAD! HOORAY!" I am sorry to crush your dreams, but I still am very much alive. I kept on getting writer's block while typing the chapter on Mary Sues, so I decided to write that one later. Today, in honor of Veteran's Day, which is celebrated in the U.S, the international capital of badfic production, (Don't be offended if you live here in the U.S. All of them do come from here!) I will write this very late Veteran's Day fic. I feel a bit more confident today, so I'll do this one in Rima's POV. I'll also be getting rid of my self-insert in this chapter because I've gotten used to not writing in second person.

Also, thank you Laserbrain! It took me a while to find the error but I smashed it to smithereens with my virtual brick! (Also, I believe it is 'grammatical error' instead of 'grammar error.' ^_^;)

"Attention all characters! The meeting shall now commence!" Kage no Hana, also known as Lychee, shouted. If my day hadn't already been ruined by Crossdresser's existence, then my day would have been ruined.

"Yaya-chi doesn't want to be at this meeting!" Yaya whined.

"Too bad! Deal with it!" Lychee replied. (Calling her by her name feels so awkward, it's like calling Crossdresser *mental gag* Nagihiko! I think I'll just call her 'the Author' now. Yeah, that sounds better.) "Anyways, I have called this pointless meeting to announce that I have joined the International Anti-Badfic Association! Which doesn't exist! Yay!" 'the Author' announced.

"And why should we care?" I asked.

"Because I would like to honor the many veterans of the Goodfic vs Badfic War who

spent their time and lack of energy fighting against the badfic authors! Plus I want you guys to support this movement!" she answered. I'm not sure what everyone thought, but I'm pretty sure over 75% of us sweatdropped.

"Um, what war? I haven't heard of any," Amu, who was as dense as ever, asked.

"The Goodfic vs Badfic War: An unnamed virtual war located on the website known as Fanfiction, in the Shugo Chara fandom, where many 'Goodfic authors' constructively criticize 'Badfic authors' to bring life to the fandom once again by eliminating some of the increasing 'Badfics' of the fandom," Hikaru recited. I swear, this kid either

a) Reads the dictionary everyday

b) Memorized every Wikipedia page in existence

c) Gets on Wikipedia on his fancy computer thingy at every available moment, or

d) Spends his spare time thinking of fancy definitions and descriptions for every noun that exists.

I would be happier if he wasn't the new King's chair, but then again- an evil little walking Wikipedia page is better than some insane psycho bent on world domination.

"In other words, a group of idiots argues with another group of idiots on a website that people with no life get on to write about us," I explained. "The first group of idiots, who are probably more idiotic, is lead by the many idiotic 'Goodfic authors' who act like Yaya and try to pair me up with Crossdresser," I continued.

" Yaya-chi is doing a good thing!" Yaya protested, although everyone just ignored her.

"Hey! I'm one of them! And I heard that!" the author interrupted. As usual, everyone ignored her.

"Rima-chan, could you at least think of a nicer name for me?" the thing-that-ruined-my-life-by-existing asked.

"Fine, I'll call you Purplehead. Happy?" I asked.

"No," he replied.

"Too bad." I retorted.

"I'm bored of watching you two argue and constructively criticizing people. So I'll just try to get you guys to support this movement!" the author said.

"Yeah, and I'll try to leave so I can send you to an asylum to be locked up and never released," I muttered under my breath.

"Anyways, let's start with...RIMA-CHAN!" the author yelled. Does she kind of remind you of Yaya right now?

''Wait, what?" I blankly asked.

"Do you want to be forever paired with Nagihiko in badfics or not?" she asked.

"NO!"

"Then join me! WE SHALL DESTROY ALL RIMAHIKO FICS WHERE YOU CAN BARELY EVEN SEE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THAT AND AMUTO! MWAHAHAHA!" she yelled. (Is it just me, or do all authors seem like they're on drugs or something?) "CROSS THIS LINE IF YOU CHOOSE TO JOIN ME! MWAHAHAHAHA!" she screeched as she drew a line on the ground with some chalk that had appeared out of nowhere.

"Sure…although it would be better if he disappears altogether," I grumbled as I crossed the line.

"Alright! Up next is…Nagihiko! Be honest- do you like being paired up with Rima?" she yelled. Crapcrapcrapcrap-crap!

Ping.

Uh-oh. "Ping" is not a good sound. "Ow" is, especially if it comes from Crossdresser, but "ping" is never a good sound.

"MWAHAHAHAHAHA! BOW DOWN TO YOUR KING, COMMONERS! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!" Hotori yelled. Thank you, Hotori-kun. I will never fall asleep while you are talking ever again. (I hope. I wonder why he chara-changed though?)

Crossdresser was smart, for once, and crossed 'the line' while the author wasn't looking. I made a mental note to kill the author later on.

"That was odd…and wait- when did Nagihiko get here? Oh well! Yaya! Cross the line if you want candy!" the second most annoying person I've ever met shouted. Yaya, who was just as gullible as Amu, skipped over 'the line' while humming something that sounded suspiciously like "Chocolate-tan!" I still wonder why we're friends.

After Yaya skipped over the line, the author said, "Umm…I really don't have anything else to say! Cross the line if you want to destroy me AKA my self-insert!" Then, everyone crossed the line. (Not that much of a surprise, since everyone probably hates her.)

"OK! Bye! I'm leaving now! Forever!" she announced. Then, she disappeared in a flash of some really badly planned special effects. An awkward silence ensued.

"Yay! She's gone and the whole entire world lives happily ever after!" Yaya announced for no apparent rea-

-Wait, why is the screen shrinking! And why are we all frozen in place! Sto-

End of episode 8

You were probably wondering why I wasn't around for so long. If you really want to know, I was criticizing people. Think for a moment- how many decent fics have you seen today? -not a lot, right? Have you noticed the increasing amount of OOCness in fics? The improper grammar? What about Mary Sues and self-inserts? There are people out there trying to stop these things. But sadly, the amount of people who write those…those inhumanities greatly outnumber those who try to stop it. So, I am asking you to review and offer tips for improvement to those people in order to obtain a fandom filled with literature.

But that'll never happen. So instead, I am asking you to hurl bricks at grammatical errors or set your Wapanese fangirl-eating hounds on those badfic authors. Or kindly point out their mistakes, if you're really patient.

This chapter also lightly made fun of OOCness and self-inserts. I know I've been using one myself, but that was only used as a 'bridge' between writing in second person and writing in first person. I'll try to make the next chapter longer, I promise!

The reason self-inserts are so annoying, is because of their remarkable resemblance to Mary-Sues. It's either that, or because they seem like they were made to live their authors fantasies, and make the characters OOC by doing so. They literally radiate waves of irritation(?), which is basically the equivalent of holding up a giant sign that says, "Hi! I'm annoying! Kill me and flame the author!" For example:

Self Insert: hi! I'm Crystal-Sapphire-Emerald-Mackenzie-Madison-Chloe-Marilyn-Susan*, but call me Bunny-chan!1!1! this is my 1st story so plz dont critisize me so ill stay this bad at riting 4evr=a!1!1! ^w^

Amu: OMG UR SO COOL AND KAWAII1!1!

Tadagay: I 3 U BUNNY-SAMA!1!1

Yaya: OMG ITS TADAGAY KILL HIM!11!

Self Insert: *hit tadase with bat* there! now hes dead ^w^1!1!

Rima: YAY! THAT MEANS I GET 2 DO THE DISCLAIMER!1!

Nageheko*: NUH!1 I WANT 2 BUNNY-SAMA!1!

Self Insert: hmm…IKUTO! I CHOSE U*!1!1

Ikuto: bunny-sama does not own shugo chara, desu~nya!

.: Amu POV :.

"today theres a new girl joining our class her name is Crystal-Sapphire-Emerald-Mackenzie-Madison-Chloe-Marilyn-Susan1!"our stopid tichir nikaido-sensei said.

"u can call me bunny-chan!"the new girl was rly prety and looked like a modil so every1 shouted "BUNNY-SAMA!1!"then ran said"I sense charas"and miki said"it has 2 b the new girl!1"after class was ovr we went up 2 bunny-sama and asked "hey do u want 2 join the gardens*?"then bunny-sama said "sure and i have 7 charas whos names r tiffany,neko,inu,clara,baka,usagi,and sara we trans4m 2gether we bcome embryo princess and then we can make all wishs come tru." so i said "shugoi!plz come 4 the meeting 2day!bye bunny-sama!"and she answered "okay! ^_^"

Self Insert: dun-dun DUN!1 ul hav 2 read the next chappy 2 find out what happens at the meeting!1!

Amu: hey, is the new girl u?

Self Insert: im glad u noticed1! it is!

Yaya: wow…R&R1!

Self Insert: review cuz I wont update until i get 30 reviews!11

*Try to find the words "Mary Sue" in there!

*I misspelled it on purpose, so don't shoot it, okay? It really annoys me when I see invisible virtual holes in my story.

*Does this line remind anyone of a freakishly long anime that had a fairly good plot, but it gets worse and worse every season, which it has a ton of?

*Sorry for all of these notes, but I just want to tell you that it's meant to be a misspelling of the word 'guardians.'

Now doesn't that just make you want to wring her head, and low-capacity mind, off? Do you now see how annoying Lychee (the self-insert) was?

...

If you don't, you are either lying, blind, freakishly nice, being stupid, needing to see a doctor, needing mental therapy,or you have serious, incurable mental problems, which I highly doubt.

Chapter Summary: If you see a badfic, give criticism. If you are a badfic writer, expect criticism. If you have a self-insert, kill it before I come and flame you.