Fighting Back

Chapter 7

Nicole pulled the Navy Samcro t-shirt, that was more than 3 sizes to big for her, over her head. Wiping the steam off the mirror with her hand, she found herself staring at her reflection. Once again her breath caught in her throat as she took in the extent of the damage Ryan had caused her, but the damage he had caused her physically was nowhere near as server as damage he had caused emotionally.

When Juice pulled up outside Clay and Gemma's house she felt herself nearing what could only be explained as a panic attack. It had been the first time she'd been back there, the first time she had thought about it and after what Hale had told her tonight, she felt the weight of everything starting to crush her.

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Juice sat at the bar in the Clubhouse. Nicole had insisted on going there instead of Clay and Gemma's house. Juice didn't understand at first but then he realised that was where her attack took place and that it would have been the first time she would have been back, he gathered she obviously wasn't ready to go back there.

His eyes were transfixed on the hallway as he waited for her to come out. She had been quiet the whole ride and when they entered the clubhouse she went straight to Jax's room, ignoring everyone inside. Juice knew she was in no mood for company so he made the few sweet-butts and hangarounds that were occupying the bar leave so that it was just the two of them.

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40 minutes Nicole had been hiding in Jax's room and Juice could feel himself growing impatient, he was itching to go and check she was okay, and probably a month ago he would have but considering how their relationship was at the moment he didn't feel comfortable doing that.

As he picked what was left of the label on his beer, he heard a creek on the floorboards. Looking up, he saw Nicole standing in the hallway. He couldn't help but check her out as she stood in front of him, nervously playing with the hem of the t-shirt she was barley wearing.

"Where is everyone?"

"I sent them packing, figured you didn't want them hanging around."

He got up and walked behind the bar, he heard the pitter-patter of her bare feet across the wooden floorboards as she walked over, taking a seat on the stool Juice had just vacated. He grabbed the bottle of Brandy and poured her a glass, as he was pouring the drink, he noticed that she was rubbing her injured wrist.

"Your wrist hurting?" He asked as he pushed the glass of Brandy over to her.

"I think I landed on it when I hit the ground."

Juice walked around the bar. He stood in front of her and took her hand gently in his as he unstrapped the splint to get a better look at her wrist.

"Looks pretty swollen. I think you should leave the splint off for a little bit."

Nicole didn't miss the fact that he held onto her hand a little longer than most people would have. She wasn't going to complain though, she was enjoying this small moment of intimacy with him.

"Juice can we talk?"

"Yeah."

"Tonight, Hale told me something about Rya..." Hearing Nicole about to talk about Ryan, a subject that he didn't want to talk about, he let go of her hand.

"I don't want to talk about him." He snapped.

"Juice I really need to talk to someone."

"You can talk to me about anything..."

"Anything but Ryan, right?"

"I just can't and you shouldn't ask me to."

"Please." Juice completely backed away from her.

"I'm sorry." Juice apologised as he headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" He looked back and stared at her for a second before walking out the door, leaving her all alone. "Juice." she shouted after him, but again nothing.

Nicole crumbled, no longer to keep everything inside. Walking behind the bar she grabbed a bottle of vodka, her favourite. She took the bottle over to the leather sofa's and necked a mouthful, not caring that she was on medication to her this was all the medication she needed right now.

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Clay and the others finally left the police station, it was early maybe about 1 or 2 am. They had been tied up giving statements, trying to stop Jax being taken to prison and of course trying to figure what the hell had happened. They all went their separate ways, most of them exhausted from the nights events and were heading home to get a couple hours of sleep so they would have a clear head for the busy day they knew lay ahead of them trying to find out who was responsible for all this.

Clay gave Kozik the okay to go home. Kozik knew he should probably stay and help out his brothers but he had prior commitments back in Tacoma. But if he was honest with himself he would have probably tried to get out of Charming the first chance he could. He had heard rumours that she had come home but didn't believe them, until he saw her standing in front of him.

Jury and Needles went the local motel that they were staying at during their stay, as the clubhouse was full at the moment.

Happy headed back to the Clubhouse alone, not that he minded sometimes he preferred to be alone, it gave him a chance to think although on this occasion he was a little wired after the nights events and was hoping there may be a couple of sweet-butts hanging around to help release some of his pent up energy.

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Happy parked up and headed into the Clubhouse and noticed that it was completely empty, no sweet-tbutts in sight, he was out of luck. He walked over to bar deciding that if he couldn't get laid then he'd get drunk instead.

When he walked around the bar to grab a bottle of Jack Daniels, he saw Nicole stretched out of the sofa, her t-shirt hitched high up her thigh, as her long dark hair fell over her shoulder, covering the side of her face. He took the bottle and walked over to her, quietly placing the bottle of Jack onto the coffee table in front of him. Removing his cut he unzipped the black hooded jumper he was wearing, stepping around the table he placed his jacket over her, covering her legs keeping some of her modesty.

As he went to take a seat on the chair opposite her, his foot kicked something. Bending down he picked up a bottle of Vodka, taking a quick examination he realised it was almost empty. He bent down beside her, gently using his finger to move her hair from her face. Just like he'd thought her eyes were red and puffy, she'd been crying. He shook his head, knowing full well that she was probably starting to spiral out of control, he'd seen this happen to her before, knew the signs.

He removed his attention from her when he heard her phone ringing, he looked around and saw it lying by the side of her. He picked it up, answering it quickly so that the noise didn't wake her.

"Hello." He answered walking outside the Clubhouse.

"Juice?"

"No It's Hap."

"What are you doing with Nicole's cell?"

"She's at the Clubhouse."

"Juice was supposed to bring her here, that idiot. She okay?"

"Yeah, she's crashed out on the sofa."

"Okay. I'll come over."

"I can keep an eye on her if you want."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks. Call me if you need anything."

"Sure."

Happy walked back into the bar, pleased to see that Nicole was still flat out on the sofa. He grabbed the bottle of Whisky, taking a drink as he sat in the chair opposite her. He took another hit of Whisky, knowing that the alcohol would help make his bed for the night a little more comfortable.

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Nicole woke the next morning lying flat on her back. Opening her eyes she was instantly met with a surge of pain, but this time it wasn't from her injures, it was from her head. She was hungover, and from the heavy weight pressing against the back on her eyes it was going to be a bitch. 'Damn meds' She thought to herself. She knew they were the reason why she had this hangover, because had drunk a lot more than she did last night, and had never suffered this much.

As she sat up she felt the pounding in her head triple. She rubbed her temples hoping that the action would minimise the pain. She noticed the jacket that was covering her, it wasn't there last night. Looking around the clubhouse for the owner she realised it was completely empty. She saw her cell on the table in front of her. Picking it up she looked at the time, it was 7 in the morning, way to early in her mind. She shrugged on the jacket as the morning chill hit her.

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Happy had left the room to go and take a leak, on his return he saw Nicole sitting up with her head buried in her hands, he chuckled to himself knowing she was hungover.

"Bad head?" Nicole slowly lifted her head up.

"Could say that." He laughed to himself again before walking into the small kitchen. He pulled two bottles of waters from the fridge. He handed one to Nicole as he sat back down.

"Thanks." Nicole took a sip of her water. "This is getting a habit." She stated before taking another sip.

"What is?"

"Me waking up to find you watching over me." Happy didn't answer instead he just took a sip of his own water, her words reminded him that he needed to have a little word with Juice. Figure out why he thought in that stupid head of his that it would be a good idea to leave her alone. "What happened after I left?" Nicole asked rubbing her temples again. "What happened with Jay?"

"He got arrested."

"Great, just what we need. The others?"

" Everybody headed home for some shut eye apart from Koz he went back to Tacoma." Nicole nodded.

"Did you manage to get some."

"Enough."

"Good. Why was Koz in Charming anyway?" Happy shrugged.

"Needed to talk to Clay bout something, why?"

"Just asking." Nicole got to her feet, ignoring the thumping in her head and the prying eyes of Happy.

Happy watched her disappear down the hall, a little confused. She reappeared 15 minutes later, her hair was tied back in a ponytail and she was dressed in the clothes she had been wearing the previous evening.

"Would you mind dropping me off at Jay's house?" She asked, handing him back his jacket.

"Sure."

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"Am I out?" Jax asked as Unser opened his cell.

"Under the circumstances I think I can make an exception for the obstruction charge." Unser replied opening the cell gate further to let Jax out.

"Thanks."

"A word of warning though." Jax stopped to look at Unser. "This attack I know what it means, what you guy's gotta do..."

"I don't give a shit bout retaliation. I'm gonna find my kid." Jax went to leave but turned back. "I'm sorry about Hale, he shouldn't have got caught up in this." Unser nodded his head thankfully.

When Jax emerged outside the station he saw that Clay, Opie, Chibs and Bobby were waiting for him. Clay was the first to greet him, embracing him in a brief hug, patting him on his back as he let go.

"Jacky boy." Chibs and Jax shook hands.

"Hey Bro." Jax greeted Opie and Bobby while Clay made his way over to Unser.

"So what do we know about shooter." Clay asked.

"His jaw, cheek and nose were busted." Clay laughed to himself, proud by the damage his step son had caused.

"Mayan?"

"No. Few prior's but no known affiliations." Unser informed him.

"Doesn't make any sense." Opie added now including himself in their conversation.

"So what are we looking at?" Clay questioned "Baby sitters at St. Thomas?"

"Not sure. Saint police are on it." Clay wiped his eyes, as he tried to get it straight in his mind. "I have news for your bride." Unser announced. "Seems like Zobelle's girl went down with a nine mill in her hand."

"Self defence?" Jax queried taking an interest in what he'd just heard.

"Possibly. Irish kid took two in the back. That's still looking like murder number one."

"Well at least Zobelle's daughter is something." Clay stated trying to reassure everyone.

As Jax walked away with Clay he decided to take this opportunity to question him.

"Where we at with the Irish?"

"Sitting down with Jimmy this afternoon." Clay responded.

"Shit." Clay raised his eyebrow at Jax's reaction to his answer but when looked over to where his attention was focused on, he saw Tara.

"You lot go on ahead I won't be a minute."

Jax walked over to Tara. He waited till all of the guys had pulled away before he spoke. "What are you doing here?"

"Happy dropped Nicole off this morning. Said you were being released."

"I don't know what happens now Tara, it's going to get a lot worse." He admitted.

"I know."

"Do you? What happened last night was just the tip of the iceberg." Jax was trying to push her. He needed to figure out if she was strong enough.

"You trying to scare me?" She knew exactly what he was up to.

"Yeah I am." Jax answered honestly. Bit it didn't affect Tara, she was in it for the long haul, she just had to prove it to him.

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Nicole took a shower to refresh herself, after straightening her hair and applying some make-up, she got dressed in a pair of dark blue ripped jeans and a white vest before pulling on one of Jax's Samcro jackets, just like the one Happy had used to keep her warm.

She's asked Tara earlier if she was okay to drive. Tara was reluctant at first and went into Doctor mode, but true to form Nicole ignored everything.

At least on the drive over to the Hospital, Nicole's mind was occupied on how to drive with a fractured wrist. But as soon as entered the Hospital her mind was focused on one thing and that was Ryan.

After a few good lies and pleads she finally found out what room Ryan was in. As she approached the room alone, her paced slowed as she saw the armed police officers guarding his room.

"I'm here to see Ryan."

"Sorry Miss Can't let you in." One of the officers said.

"Why not?"

"Samcro members are not aloud through this door." Nicole couldn't help but laugh.

"What do you think I'm going to do. Besides he wants to see me." The man looked at her unbelievingly. "Will you at least ask him before you kick my ass outta here?" The two officers looked at one another, before one them went inside Ryan's room.

The guard returned less than two minutes later. "You can go in."

"See told you."

Nicole stared at the door, she was still unsure if she was doing the right thing but she knew she had to get this over and done with whether it turned out to be good or bad.

"You going in?" The officer asked.

"Hmm...Yeah, I'm going inside." Nicole sucked in her breath and walked inside.

Ryan was sitting in his bed. His head shot straight to Nicole when he heard the door open. They silently looked at each other over, inspecting the injures the other had inflicted.

Ryan's shoulder was bandaged up, she saw the scratch on his face that she caused. Nicole shook her head, he'd really gotten away lightly. She was hurting both physically and mentally, but he didn't seem to be, in fact the cocky smile that was on his face as he continued to stare at her, told Nicole that he wasn't even sorry for what he had done.

"Good to see you Nic" His words caused her to shudder.

"What's this all about Ryan? Hale said you wanted to see me?"

"What no small talk first?"

"No."

"Fair enough. I want you to drop all the charges against me."

"No...No way. You've got to be joking." Nicole scoffed, shaking her head but when she looked back at Ryan who was staring at her blankly. "Oh my god your not joking."

"Nope."

"That ain't gonna happen."

"Oh I think it is." He replied cockily.

"Really."

"Yeah because I know you'd rather not have your boyfriend's ass end up in Jail."

"Juice. What's Juice got to do with this?"

"Nothing. Guess again." Nicole tried to think about who he was talking about then it dawned on her. "Happy?"

"That's the one. See I know Hale has been telling everyone that he was the one who shot me, but you and I know both know that's not the truth."

"You bastard."

"Don't be like that Nic, I am giving you a choice. You can still press charges against me if you want..."

"Yeah, but you'll drag Hap down with. So really I don't have a choice." Ryan just laughed at her, she was right she didn't have a choice and he knew it.

"So you'll do it?" She reluctantly nodded.

"I'll go and talk with Unser."

"Good." He watched as she headed to the door. "Wait, there's something else." She turned back to face him.

"What is it?" She asked feeling deflated.

Ryan didn't say anything as he pulled back the covers and got out of bed. He moved over to her. Nicole froze when she realised that he was getting closer to her. Her eyes fell to his leg that he was limping on, she knew it was from when she had stabbed him with a piece of glass.

She knew he was weak, where his weak spots were, but even knowing that she still felt scared, and that's why she didn't move, she couldn't.

Ryan noticed the fear in her eyes, he'd seen it many times before at his hand. He stopped just inches in front of her. His hand moving a stray piece of hair from her face, causing her to flinch.

"I know you won't believe me when I tell you that I'm sorry and I never meant to hurt you."

"Never meant..." She turned her head to the side as she wiped away a stray tear. Sucking in a shaky breath she turned back to face him. "Ryan you beat the shit out of me, try to...Try to rap..."

"That was a mistake. My head was all over the place, I thought I was going to lose you."

"You have lost me Ryan."

"I know." For the first time Nicole could see that he was genuinely sorry for his actions. She stared into his eyes for a moment trying to figure what the hell he was thinking.

"Ry..."

"I can't say around here, I'd be a sitting duck for your family."

"I get that. But how do I know that once the charges are dropped that you won't just drop Hap in the shit anyway."

"Your just going to have to trust me." He remarked as his finger ran across her cheek. Nicole felt her stomach turn as his hand touched her skin. She couldn't be in the same room as him any longer.

"Fine." She thought her answer would make him move away from her but it didn't. He stayed in front of her staring down at her, his gaze so intense Nicole couldn't look at him. "Can you move...Ryan...please."

He nodded and when Nicole felt him back away she finally looked up. She expected him to have that cocky smile on his face that he always had when he knew he had scared her, but this time was different. He wasn't cocky in the slightest in fact he looked upset. Nicole's head was spinning she needed to get out.

Nicole couldn't explain what she was feeling as she left Ryan's room all she knew for sure was that she was going to throw up.

She ran to the bathroom down the hall. Throwing open the cubical door before she dropped to her knees, vomiting up nothing but bile. She hadn't eaten anything all day so she was basically dry heaving and it was killing her already damaged ribs.

Nicole emerged from the bathroom 5 minutes later. She still felt queasy but there was nothing left inside. As she made her way back to her car she saw Unser at the reception desk. Deciding that she might as well get this over and done with, she walked over to him.

"Wayne." The older man turned around. His brows furrowing as he took in the girls' appearance. Her face looked completely drained of colour.

"You okay?"

"Can I talk to?"

"Sure." Unser ushered her inside the waiting room across the hall. "Is this about your Aunt?"

"Um No." Nicole took a seat, Unser did the same. "But thanks for everything that you've done for her."

"Your Aunts a great woman, it was a pleasure to help her." Unser noticed that her hands were shaking, he was curious to know what was causing her stress. "So what can I do for you?"

"I want all the charges on Ryan dropped." She mumbled as she kept her eyes glued to the floor.

"What?"

"You heard." Unser remained silent for a moment watching the young girl in front of him as her fingers nervously pulled at a stray thread on the cuff of her jacket.

"What's happened?" She got to her feet and looked him dead in the eye.

"Nothing. I just don't want him charged with this." She told him firmly.

"Have you spoken to Ryan."

"Yes, but he hasn't forced me to do this if that's what you're thinking."

"Then why?" Unser was now on his feet.

"Because...because I love him and I don't want him going down for this. What happened it was a mistake, he didn't mean it." She lied, but it was the only thing she could think of. She just hoped that he brought it.

"This really what you want?"

"Yes."

"Okay, I'll see what I can do. Clay and Jax aren't going to like this." Unser rubbed his hand over his thinning hair, he really didn't understand her choice.

"I don't want Jax and Clay to know, well at least till it's all official."

"I'm not sure I can do that."

"Please, they can't know not yet. Please just keep this to yourself."

"Okay, sweetheart I'll keep it quiet for now."